On this day, the streets were empty. What a lovely day, such easy traffic, such clear weather.
"Why am I still at work?" an office slave had her face squished against the desk, metaphorical tears running down. T_T. What a mood.
The hum of the office carried on. Paperwork piled and cases were still seen.
"At least it's a quieter day, less clients." munched CC.
She was trying to see the brighter side, that is until a hamster smacked her snacks away.
"Stop eating cheetos!" it squeaked, devouring the snacks for itself. "What you eat I eat and I want health! Only with health can I conquer the world and inflict righteous pain!"
"Yes yes Mr. Hamster." responded CC automatically, opening a different bag of chips.
"Staaaaaaph!" slapped the hamster, flinging the bag to somewhere far away.
Maybe CC's co-worker. Oh....looks like they were sharing chips today. It was a peaceful day. Maybe, on the bright side, she could sneak some more work and writing down today. Yes, the updates to her web novels were nice. A concentrated place to world build and turn drafts into actual content. For once the hamster actually agreed and left the lazy human to get to it. Boredom and sadness were great motivations.
Just when the human got the right tab open, when she opened up her longest little hobby, some shit called Unloved Twin or whatever, duty called. No really.
*ring ring*
A nondescript black Panasonic phone rang. It was a plain and simple thing, one you might see at an office near you, and yet to every office slave, it might as well be cursed.
"Hello XXXX-XX company, how many I help you today?" answered a perfectly polite office employee, customer service voice fully on.
It sounded like an entirely different person. So sweet, so nice. If it was a forever alone guy on the other side of the phone, he might even turn stupid and try to start flirting. It had happened a few times. The life of customer service was a cursed one.
"Hello yes? I'm scared of the coronavirus!" called the crackly voice on the phone.
"Oh? That's...unfortunate. But what can we do for you today?" CC tried.
"I want the vaccine!"
"I'm sorry madam, that's not something that we at XXXX-XX have any dealings with at this time, also it does not even exist."
"Don't lie to me! I saw in the paper!"
"We sincerely do not have such a product at XXXX-XX, nor does anyone else. For it does not exist. Our sincerest apologies."
"Well that's unprofessional of you. Fine then I want the last 10 years of vaccines!"
"...I beg your pardon?"
"I want every vaccine this country has made from the last 10 years injected into my veins at once!"
"We at XXXX-XX greatly advise against that...nor is it possible. Have a wonderful day. Good bye." *click*
CC took a calming sip of tea, yes, not waking Mr.Hamster from his nap. Work was boring and peaceful and tiny fuzzy creatures needed their sleep.
Back to work!
CC got maybe two lines down and a Wikipedia page open when the phone rang again.
*ring ring*
"Hello XXXX-XX company, how many I help you today?"
"The mall is closed." comes a deep voice.
"...pardon? How may we serve you today sir?"
"The mall is closed. My bank is closed. What do I do?"
"Sir?"
"Am I going to be ok? Tell me what to do."
"Please hold."
Out of fear, confusion and great mortification, CC did the only thing she could do in this situation. Redirect the call to a co-worker.
It's fine....it's a peaceful day. Nice and peaceful. Very few clients, just a slight increase in odd phone calls. Yes. Still a fine day to get work done.
*ring ring*
She dives for the phone before it could wake up murder hamster.
"Hello XXXX-XX company, how many I help you today?"
"I want my free hand sanitizer and face masks!" shrieks a shrill voice.
CC could feel her soul leaving her body in parts and pieces, like slices of left over cake at a party.
"I apologize dear customer, whatever do you mean?"
"I know the government has allocated cases of free hand sanitizer and face masks for your office to pass out to patients. I want to reserve my cases, I'll be there soon."
"Madam, I believe you have the wrong number. We've received no such announcements of shipments, especially from the government?"
"Is this not an OFFICE!!!!?"
"....Yes this XXXX-XX."
"THEN YOU HAVE LOTS OF FREE CASES. HOW DARE YOU HOARD THEM. I'LL SUE!!!"
"I do apologize."
"I SAID I'LL SUE, WILL YOU GIVE THEM TO ME OR NOT?"
"I'm afraid we don't even have them?"
"I'LL SUE!!! GET ME YOUR BOSS NOW!"
"Allow me to transfer you to my assistant manager, please hold."
The office slave twitches in her seat, slamming the black phone down. It's no use though. Flashing red lights beep and shine. The increasing one by one, like a loading bar. Soon there were no more lines. No more space.
*ring ring cr-zzz32y4iuewh*
As quickly as it came, the horrible noise is gone.
But at what price?
Mr. Hamster was up again, it's adorable teeth has chewed through the wire.
"It's time." Mr. Hamster squeaked, ominously moving over to the computer mouse.
Just like that CC's screen changed. Her precious novel in progress closed for a whole new screen on the same site. Unloved Twin's workspace was changed to something else.
Queen of the Castaway Isle read the screen.
"It's time." repeated the hamster, not even taking its usual place on her head. "It's time for great violence."
Being an empty shell, her fingers start moving on their own. Clicky clicky clacky.
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