Everyone was finished for the day and our parents had settled in front of the TV and were deciding to sleep early. My dad was beat after working all day. My mom had been busy in the kitchen making a wonderful meal after she had come home from work. Since mom had started working part-time, she said she never got a chance to cook us meals anymore and she missed that. That day, she had finished early so had time to cook. We were all waiting for Sam to get home. Earlier that afternoon, she had gone out with a friend but was expected any minute.
~**~
Sam and I, Alex, were fraternal twins - she was born minutes after me so she always called me 'bb' (short for big bro) and I used to tease her as 'baby'. Since we were fraternal twins, there were inherited similarities derived from the common genealogy for both of us. Although this was true in essence, we grew up to realise the differences - we had slightly different physique and body structure. We also had slightly different temperaments.
I was a typical male - big-boned, physical, and single minded while she was a typical female - slender, sensual and very creative and artistic. I am not stereotyping but I had recognised the differences between us far earlier than the similarities. As such, we did look different although I had heard people claim to spot our parents in our looks.
Although we were fraternal twins and as such there were few similarities between us, genetically, we often felt a connection between the two of us. She had reciprocated this just the same, as usual. Over the years, our parents, Stuart and Beverly, had simply come to accept it to be sibling love. For them it was good in one sense - we never fought with each other.
Sam had always been excellent at reciprocating my feelings. There was seldom a time when I had to elaborate anything to her - I guess you could attribute it to our 'link', of being twins. We understood each other implicitly. I always felt complete in her company and presence and so did she. We also found out that for some reason we missed each other when we were apart for long. A week had come to be long enough for us to go without seeing each other.
When we were growing up as kids, I do remember the very first few times when we had gone on separate school trips and by the time we had got back, we both had been 'miserable'. We had run into each other's arms when we had got back. After a few failed attempts, even the teachers had recommended our parents to just let us be together until we 'grew up' and 'grew out of it'. They just thought it was very sweet.
We grew up for sure but over the years, we just got closer and more comfortable with each other. Therefore, it comes as no surprise that we have been very different from other siblings - instead of fight, argue and bicker, we cared, collaborated and co-operated with each other all the time.
We had our 'tussles' occasionally but it was all a guise for a tease and to enjoy some closeness. She loved to tease me and over the years, she had sussed out some of my 'weaknesses'. I knew one of her biggest weakness - she was very ticklish. I used that as my personal defence shield when I needed to. Nonetheless, one rule, out of just a few in our house, laid down by my mom very early on was that under no circumstance was I allowed to physically hurt or hit Sam. I was meant to look after her well-being and likewise no matter what, she was supposed to respect my cautions and advice as an older brother.
I guess that was never really a bother because not only was I protective of her, I would always look out for her and likewise she always looked up to me for advice and guidance. We had developed a secret code for communicating urgency and we used those key words and cues at times. This always made me feel warm inside because no one knew the codes and no matter how many times others had tried, we had not divulged it to anyone. There was an unspoken language between us and we seemed to read each other's minds through our expressions, body language and glances.
We never really needed 'best friend' while we were growing up because we were very close. In fact we had developed such closeness and trust between us, we considered ourselves as best-buds. It used to be difficult to write essays in primary school about our sibling when we were very young kids. I used to see her as my other half, my best buddy, my soul-mate. For a long while when I was growing up, I thought 'sister' was just an 'official' name for such a person. In my mind, she was my life. Apparently, the same applied for her.
Over the years, we had developed the unspoken and implied restraint from divulging anything we shared between us - she and I never told anyone about what we spoke and did between us, not even to our parents. The secrecy sustained a rather unusual non-verbal intimacy between us and it provided the trust that made us both feel very confident together.
We grew up relying on each other and my mom always said how lucky she felt that she never had to worry about us growing up - we grew up without an urgent need for being looked-after. While we were growing up, mom had stayed home taking care of us and being a perfect homemaker. Therefore, it was a relief to her when we took care of each other and she did not had to watch our every move.
Apparently, when we were toddlers, we had been known to place dummies into each other's mouths, as kids we held the bottle for each other and even slept in a hug or while holding hands. We kissed and caressed each other a lot when we were kids. When we used to be playing out and about, people used to coo at our mutual love. "They do get along lovingly," my mom used to remark.
Over the years, as we realised that our special relationship was raising some eyebrows, we had decided to 'tone it down' by making friends and hanging out with others. Having grown up so close to each other, it was difficult for both of us to find good friends - Sam found it more difficult than me, although I was the one who spent more time alone. She found it difficult to relate to other male friends and her girl friends were very different from her. Although she was a very social and bubbly person, sometimes in the evening or after dinner, she would come around for a quiet hug and we used to talk while lying in bed.
I loved to talk to her about a lot of things - she was an ideal person to talk to. She would listen, question and somewhere in there, in her subtle ways, give me new thoughts and ideas, new perspectives on life. It comes without saying that we were good at consoling each other in the times of sadness too.
~**~
Sam came home after having gone out with her friends and went straight to her room in a hurry. While climbing the stairs mom and me had noticed that she had been crying and it was evident she was not in a good mood from the bang of her bedroom door as she shut it. Then we had heard sobbing coming from her room just before it was muffled.
Since Sam and I never really argued or fought, it was rare in our house to hear doors being slammed - our parents had a happy, contented marriage. Moreover, I had never ever hurt her or upset her. Needless to say, I was taken aback with this display. We had realised this was serious. I was in the lounge with mom and dad and they had just sat down in front of the TV waiting for dinnertime. My parents had stared at me with a big puzzled and alarmed question mark expression. I stared at them for a moment.
Then I got up mumbling, "I will see what the matter is."
"Good boy," mum mumbled. "Tell her dinner is ready."
My parents never got involved between our personal affairs unless we asked for their advice - they left us to deal with each other's issues. Since I was so good at dealing with Sam about her issues, my parents just left me to it.
When I opened her bedroom door slowly, I peered in her room. She had buried her face in her pillow while lying on her tummy on her bed. Her arms were flung around the pillow and she was sobbing quietly still fully dressed. I gently closed the door and after walking slowly to the bed, I sat on it on her side and leaned on my elbow bringing my face close to her head. I started stroking her head gently, running my hand over her long light brown hair and on to her back. I did this several times. Her sobbing was slowing down and I felt she was calming down.
"Hey sweetie", I whispered gently in her ear. She turned her face toward me on the pillow and gazed at me, still tearful but had stopped sobbing.
I could hardly see her in such a state. It broke my heart to see her like that. When she looked at me after slowly composing herself, I caressed her face with my palm and lowered my face to her and asked, "What's the matter? Talk to me."
She stared at me with her tearful eyes. Her mascara had run. She had stopped sobbing but her eyes were still wet. She sat up slowly, turned around and sat on the edge of bed, dropping her feet to the floor and scooting next to me with a tissue in her hand.
As I wrapped my arms around her gently stroking her back, I said softly, "Nothing in the world is worth so much heart-ache."
I really did not know how I came up with that but something was telling me she was distraught over someone. I had never seen her cry like this before. This was her first.
She wrapped her hands around me tightly and sobbed for a few moments. I rubbed her back and tried to calm her down. As I pressed my cheek on her cheek, I ran my hand over her head down her hair. Without shushing her, I tried to calm her sobbing. After a while, she pulled out from the hug and looked at me in my eyes. She just stared at me for a few seconds.
I quietly whispered again, "What's the matter, hon?" I was still stroking her back slowly and gently but now I cupped her cheek in my palm. Seeing her in tears had made me tearful too.
She lowered her gaze and lowering her hands from my hug turned away and softly said, "I've split up with Billy. He dumped me," and sobbed again in her tissue.
I threw my arms around her and she hugged me while starting to sob again.
"Oooo." I sighed relief and sympathised while pulling her in my arms again trying to console her. I had feared something worse.
I smiled and exclaimed, "Well it's his loss. I never really understood what you saw in that douche bag in the first place. Never liked him. You deserve a lot better."
She just giggled under her tearful sobs and again calmed down before she stopped sobbing.
She poked her elbow in my stomach and muttered, "You are just saying that."
"I'm not." I protested. "You know how much I adore you. You certainly deserve a lot better. I don't know who, but certainly not that douche bag." I tried to make light of the situation.
She had been going out with Billy for a while and I thought it was going ok. He was her first real 'boyfriend'. I did not really appreciate him much as her choice, but I had thought that was down to my possessive jealousy and eventually had come to accept their friendship.
While she was turned on her side in my hug and still in my arms, I pulled her close and planted a few kisses on her forehead.
She kept glancing at me while I consoled her.
"It's your fault," she said abruptly looking straight at me in a girly whinge.
"My fault?" I was shocked and surprised as I stared at her. She grinned and so I laughed out. "How is it MY fault?" I was trying to contain my giggling. Now she was giggling from under her tears too.
"You have spoilt me by being so nice. I was wrong to assume he would be like you."
"Well sweetheart, you just made an ass of u and me", I giggled again.
She giggled too. "Stop making me smile. I feel like crying." She whinged in a girly manner.
She was good at relating to my twisted sense of humour.
"Sweetheart, you cannot compare me to him." My ego had received the biggest boost. "And moreover, you and I are different from everyone else. What you and I have is very special and unique. And yes I do adore you but that's because I do feel you are special and deserve a lot more."
I pulled her in my arms again and hugged her tightly. I gently rocked her. I planted a soft kiss deep in her neck just below her ear. That must have sent tingles in her body because I knew it was her weak spot.
She quivered slightly. "I'm just so glad to have you in my life." She said softly. "I adore you too, you know."
"I know, hon." I whispered softly as I pressed her into my hug in acknowledgment. She loved it when I called her that. She used to call me that too.
"Not as much as I adore you." I remarked teasingly.
She punched her elbow in my stomach again jokingly and gave me a stern look. I chuckled.
She was much composed now as she wiped her eyes and tears.
"Hungry?" I looked at her.
She just nodded after a momentary glance.
"I'm starving. I was waiting for you. Mom asked me to get you down for the dinner. Come on." I cocked my head in the direction of the door.
"Go on. I will be there in a minute", she spoke looking at me with a gentle smile.
"You are going to be ok?" I tilted her face toward me with my curled finger under her chin.
She nodded in a shy grin, dimming her eyes slightly to acknowledge her composure.
"Ok." I gave her a soft quick kiss on the cheek, stood up and walked to the door. I glanced at her back, and saw her looking at me. I smiled at her warmly, and stepped out the door and gently closed it behind me. Then I walked down the stairs and sat at the dinner table. Mom and dad were already at the table.
"You guys can start. I will wait for her. She is coming in a minute." I said.
"Everything ok?" Mom inquired caringly.
"Yep. All ok now." I nodded reassuringly. "She said she will talk to me later. Man trouble." I grinned.
"Oh dear." Mom exclaimed with a sigh.
"Good lad." Dad thanked me for caring for her. "Let's tuck in. I'm starving."
That evening after the dinner, Sam had cuddled next to me on the couch as mom and dad were relaxing in front of the TV. After a while, she looked at me and signalled to go with her.
"Good night mom and dad. I'm going upstairs to bed. I had a long day." She had waived good night.
She gave me one of her cues as she trotted upstairs to her bedroom.
I waited for about 10-15 minutes before I got up, waived goodnight myself and went upstairs. I went into the bathroom, freshened up for the night and then slowly and quietly tiptoed to my bedroom.
~**~
Sam and my bedrooms were in a corner adjacent to each other at one end of the house while the master bedroom was on the opposite side. In the middle was our common bathroom. Mom and dad had on-suite bathroom. We only had two bedrooms as such with a smaller study. For that reason, it was decided that when it was time for me and Sam to sleep in separate beds, as space was limited, one of us would take the study room while the other would get the bedroom and would have to share the shelves - the bedroom was more spacious and the study was a smaller room in comparison. Mom left us two to decide who took which room. As usual, Sam wasn't fussed and she looked at me and I wanted her to make the choice and we had just looked at each other for a while.
"Oh sort it out you two", mom had said exasperatedly and left it to us.
I had told Sam she could have the main bedroom if I could have access to it as and when. She was more than pleased to do so and had agreed and from then on, she had permitted me to use her room. There was more. Among the few rules that we had in our house, mom and dad both knocked and waited for 'come in' before entering our rooms if the door was closed. They treated us as proper adults from the very beginning. They never barged in if the door was closed but unlocked even after knocking. They always said, "A closed door needs to be treated as locked; else it could have been left open."
However, due to my arrangement with Sam, she had granted me 'special privilege' to access her room without knocking. She never required me to knock and just the same, she never knocked before entering my room. As such because both our parents knocked and waited before they opened closed doors even if they were unlocked, Sam and I fell into a habit of never locking our doors; just closing them shut when we needed some privacy. Nonetheless, the privacy applied only to our parents - never between us. That arrangement between us had always made me feel very special and close to her. It had also boosted our non-verbal intimacy.
~**~
While I dwindled the time waiting to hear my mom and dad get to bed, I waited patiently in my room. Once I heard the house become quiet, I went out my door closing it quietly behind and opened Sam's bedroom door and closed it behind me quietly. As I entered her room, she was in her bed curled up facing the door on her side under the duvet. It seemed like she was in her nightshirt.
When she saw me enter her room, she turned her table lamp on and raised the duvet to let me in the bed. As I got in her bed, she snuggled next to me and I wrapped my arm around her and lay on my back. She lay her head on my shoulder as she flung her arm around my chest and hugged me. As we settled in the bed, she shuffled close to me. After we had stayed like that for a while, she quietly started the conversation.
"I never really thought other guys would be so different from you." She spoke softly.
"In what way?" I stroked her back.
"Most of them seem to be just horny jerks." She spoke angrily. "No one really has the genteel heart as you."
"Well not all are horny jerks." I tried to justify calmly.
"I did see one today," she exclaimed. "He made me feel so smug just because I did not want to get physical."
"Was that the reason for today's heartache?" I inquired.
She nodded looking up at me. I felt her cheek move against my chest.
"Did he hurt you?" I asked her with straight voice.
"No." She shook her head as we looked at each other. "He just wouldn't take a 'no' for an answer."
"Now that is not news to me." I said nonchalantly. "There are a lot of guys who get worked up when they are in the mood and don't know how to be respectful."
"I just said to him I was not ready for a physical relationship and he kept pushing me. When I said I needed time, that's when he said I could have all the time I wanted and dumped me."
I just hugged her close to me while stroking her arm. "Forget him and put this behind you. Clearly he was not worth it."
"I just did not want to get physical with him that's all. He was nice enough to go out but I did not want to get physical with him. I did like him you know." Her voice suggested she was tearful.
"Don't worry about him now. Have you guys broken up officially or will you think of patching things with him?"
"No thanx. He is history." She said with a strong conviction. "Even if he begs, I ain't giving him a second chance."
"Ok. Then if he bothers you, let me know." I assured her in a big-brother kind of way.
She giggled with a girly smile. "Thanks hon. I don't think he will after the way he treated me today."
After a moment of silence, she spoke softly, a little hesitation and dismay was in her voice, "Do you think I might be lousy at being a girlfriend?""Don't you dare talk like that." I said sternly. She could tell from my voice I wasn't impressed about what she had said.
After a moment of silence she spoke, "I just wanted to see how it feels to be in a relationship. I didn't want it to end up like this, a failure."
"It's not your fault." I urged.
"Somehow it does feel like that, particularly since it was my first." She sighed despondently.
"You need to set high standards." I nudged her. "You are an angel and you need to choose more carefully." I complimented her.
"So what about you? Why aren't you in a relationship?" She asked me.
"No thank you." I replied. "I ain't interested."
"Why not?" She was puzzled. "Quite a few of my friends fancy the hot pants of you."
"Nah. I'm ok." I just shrugged it off.
She was looking at me quietly, expecting me to elaborate. Between us, we never stopped before completing our conversations. Phrases like 'forget it' or 'it doesn't matter' didn't exist between us. She stared at me and I looked at her. We had turned on our sides and were gazing at each other. I decided to open up.
"For me trust is a big thing and I need to be sure I am going to be handled with good care and sincerity. Promise should mean something, you know." I looked at her. "I don't like girls who change their mind. Most of your friends don't know what they want." I was sincere in my comments.
"True." She said softly. "I understand what you are saying."
"Even Jennifer?" she gazed at me. "She likes you a lot. What happened?"
I had gone out with Jennifer for a while. But things had fizzled out - rather I had slowed things and calmed them. I knew Sam was very close friends with Jennifer and I didn't want to ruin things between them because of me.
"She didn't live up to the promises she made." I looked at her. "I know she is your best friend so I didn't want to ruin things for you two, but I didn't want to get hurt either."
"What do you mean?" she asked being puzzled.
"Although she said she liked me and all, I never felt it with her. She seemed to just say it without actually showing it." I tried to elaborate. "For me, actions speak louder than words and I know real feelings cannot stay hidden from me for long." I looked at her and caressed her cheek as I smiled. "I've been with you for long, so I know when I'm loved."
She looked at me and smiled back as I shrugged my shoulders and grinned. She realised I had implied about her.
Then she hugged me and we lay there in silence for a while. I cuddled her in my arms.
She spoke softly again after a while. "Can I ask you something?"
"Anything hon. You know that." I nudged her. We were allowed to ask anything between us. Nothing was off-limits.
"I know." She smiled. "I just wanted to know if you had been physical with anyone yet." She remained quiet for a moment before looking at me.
"Like just playing or actually...?"
"Well either." She waited anxiously for my response.
"I have been physical a bit with Jen when we were going out, and Sara before her. They kissed and caressed me but nothing past that."
"Oh. That's all." She noted.
"Why do you ask?" I was being genuine. "Are you jealous?" I smiled.
"That's a mild word for me tonight because of how nice you have been to me." She said softly. "But I just wanted to know."
We lay there for a while in each other's arms. After I felt her nod away, I helped her roll away on her side and slowly sat up in the bed. I kissed her cheek and tucked her under the duvet. I got up from the bed and stepped out of her bedroom.
Next day, I gave her a big 4-foot tall stuffed toy teddy bear as a gift. I left it plonked in her bedroom when she was out. I had left a greeting card stuck to its hand. The card had a picture of a white swan taking flight over a lake with its wings stretched wide.
I had hand-written a verse inside the card:
'Water runs dry from a swan's feather,
as it has to fly higher and farther.
Spread your wings and take flight,
to new pastures and horizon in sight.'
When she came home, I was purposely sitting in the lounge. We were all waiting for her to get home so we could have the dinner together. When she came downstairs from her bedroom after freshening and changing into her nightwear, I looked at her but she just gazed at me with a grin and she did not say anything. I did not know if she liked her gift. After the meal, I stayed back helping mom to clear the table but Sam went to her room. Then I sat on the couch watching TV for a while. Sam never came downstairs.
When I went upstairs to kiss her good night, she was in her bed, curled up on her side facing the door. When she saw me pop into her room, she looked at me and gestured me to come in and sit next to her. She held out the card and asked me its significance.
"What does it mean?" she asked me. "What are you trying to imply?"
"Swans don't care about getting wet because water runs dry from their feathers. They shake it off like nothing happened and fly away without giving it a second thought, because there are a lot of wonderful places they have to get to, and see bigger and better things to enjoy."
"Thought so." She murmured, and then stared at the picture in the front of the card for a while. "Don't they mate for life?" She asked me gazing in my eyes.
I nodded and smiled. "You are not just a pretty face, are you?" I teased her.
She just grinned.
I looked at her deep in her eyes for a moment, with a warm gaze and said, "You need to find a swan because you are one too; I'm sure you don't realise it. The quicker you accept it, the quicker you will realise you can never be happy among poultry."
She took my hand in her hand, pulled it close to her face and kissed my palm gently. Then tucking it around her chest, she turned around on her side to face the other way and pulled my arm indicating she wanted to be spooned. I cuddled her as she lay there quietly and silently.
"Thank you for being you." She whispered softly.
"It's my pleasure as always." I whispered in her ear. I lay there for a while and as she loosened her grip on my hand, I got up propping on my hand and looked down across at her face. She had her eyes closed. I lowered my lips and planted a soft kiss on her cheek.
"Sweet dreams, hon," I whispered. I tucked her under the duvet and I caressed her hair as I ran my hand over her head. Then I caressed her cheek with my knuckles gently. Then I kissed her cheek and slowly got off her bed. I closed her door softly behind me as I stepped out of the room.
I was unable to fall asleep even after about half an hour of lying in my bed. Just when I was feeling sleepy after about an hour or so, I thought I had heard my door open and close slowly and quietly. I continued drifting to sleep. The room was illuminated with streaks of soft light from outside and was otherwise dark.
It must have been Sam as no one else walked in like that. I was sleepy anyway and I continued drifting to sleep. If she wanted me, she would usually wake me up so there was no reason for me to wake up. I was sleeping on my back with my face turned toward the door.
Sam just stood there and I heard sound of her walking toward me. I pretended to be asleep. She then seemed to have kneeled next to my bed. A whiff of her fragrance gave her closeness away - I could never miss recognising that sweetness. After a moment or so, I felt and heard her hair rustle as she lowered her face to mine and I felt her lips on mine as she planted a soft kiss. She must have done that very gently and softly so as not to wake me. I wanted to let her think that so I continued to pretend to be asleep.
There was moment of silence. I think she wanted to make sure I was still asleep and the short sensual demonstration of her admiration for me had not stirred me up. Then I heard a rustle that indicated she had stood up and walked away from the bed. Then I heard her mummer, "I love you." I heard the door open and close quietly behind her.
I had many mixed feelings that night. I knew we were close but that was the first time I had truly realised her feelings about me and it made me feel very happy. She really loved me deeply.For our 18th birthday, I had been wrecking my brains to think of something nice to gift Sam. I had asked her what she wanted. After a moment of contemplation, she softly said, "The fact that you are in my life, I have had the best present ever already."
That had made me so warm inside. "Come on hon. please give me some idea sweetheart." I had begged her again after I had hugged her in appreciation to what she had said. "Please." I looked in her eyes, nearly begging.
She looked at me with her deep warm eyes then said something that stayed with me forever. "Hon, whenever you feel you wish to gift me something special, let it be your own creation, one of its kind so it can become truly mine." She had said it calmly and gently. "That would always be special to me just as you are." She cupped my cheek and looked at me with warm eyes and a loving grin.
Therefore, I had presented her something truly unique on our 18th. It was a half-opened oyster shell with a pearl inside, resting on a proportional wooden pedestal. On the front face of the pedestal were the words inscribed on a small plaque "you are more precious that any pearl". When she saw it first, she was perplexed. "It is beautiful. I'm sure there is more to it than meets the eye." She had smiled while inspecting it.
I explained to her how I had found the shell on a holiday in the sea. I had cleaned it and painted it with resin, and stuck inside it a single natural pearl I bought from the mall. I had made the wooden stand in our garage and hand written the plaque on it.
On hearing all this, she looked at it again, placed it gently on her table next to her bed, and then opened her arms wide and just scooped me into a tight hug. She held me like that for what seemed hours.
"I adore you so much", she whispered in my ear still hugging me.
When she came out of the hug, I saw tears welled up in her warm eyes.
"Hey baby." I took her in my arms and kissed her cheek. "Didn't you like it?" I was trying to make her smile.
"Don't be silly." She punched me jokingly on my shoulder. "I love it. It is the most wonderful gift I've ever received," she said softly. "I'm just overwhelmed by the love you show me at times."
"You did say it had to be special." I smiled.
"I know. This is very special indeed," she said softly pushing herself into my arms.
I hugged her tenderly taking her in my arms and kissing her on her neck. She had melted in my arms as we hugged for a while. All the while, I could feel her hand stroking and running through the hair on the back of my head. She loved to play with my hair as I loved to play with hers. I kissed her gently on the cheek with a soft quick kiss just before we came out of the hug. Her soft curvy torso had melted into my arms.
"I have something for you too," she said excitedly.
She handed me a wrapped box with nice ribbon and a heart sticker. Talk about putting sensual touch on something as bland as a gift box. That was my little sister.
When I opened it, there was a 100ml eau de toilette bottle. There was the letter X inscribed on it with gold coloured resin like an insignia. I just looked at her. She used to call me 'X' quite many times. It was short for Alex. When she was little, she could not pronounce my name and used to call me that. It just stayed with her like that even after she grew up.
"Go on, try it." She was waiting with baited breath.
I sprayed it on my arm, rubbed it in and let it mature. As I took a sniff, I realised it was very classy and refreshing fragrance. I could smell some citrus fruits, a small hint of flowers and a very classy after-note. It matured into a very refreshing fragrance. Clearly, it was blend of many different fragrances. It was a pleasantly complex fragrance.
"Nice." I smiled as I looked at her, inspecting the bottle and the box. "I like it; very interesting fragrance."
"Oh good." She jumped with excitement. "I was not sure if you would like it. But by now I think I have sussed your taste."
"Go on. Tell me more about it." I was curious to know. It was apparent that this was not an off-the-shelf purchase.
She smiled coyly. "Remember the trip I went last month with my friends. Well it was not quite what I made it out to be. I had visited a perfume factory. They provide factory tours and after the tour, you can make a personalised custom fragrance of your own. They usually only do 30ml bottles but I paid extra to get me a 100ml."
"So you created this perfume?" I was curious, now that I had realised what the gift was.
She nodded. "They taught us the basics of fragrance and how the perfume is made. Then they gave us about 15 minutes to make up our own collation. From what I had researched and understood there, I came up with 3 different ones and then finalised this one."
"Why this one then?" I looked at her inquisitively.
"This reminds me of you." She said softly. "We were told that perfume has individuality and personality and this is just you. When I smelled it, it made me think of you." She was very sultry and sensual in her voice.
"Thanks." I smiled and hugged her. "May be YOU should use it then rather than me," I teased her.
"Then I would be loopy all the time and won't get anything done." She blushed. She nudged my arm in a tease.
After our birthday, I felt Sam and I had begun to come closer. I realised it later but she had started to let her hair grow just because I liked long hair. She started asking me to take her shopping, just so that she could ask my opinion on the clothes she chose. She would ask me to choose her perfume for her. I used to do the same - let her choose for me. I started letting her shop my clothes for me - just because she complained that I had no taste in fashion. I had figured it was her way of suggesting that I wear her choice of clothes. She never wore anything that I had not chosen.
"I need you to take me shopping," was her code for asking me indirectly to choose for her. When I realised that, I started selecting her clothes and she would try them for me.
She had a lovely figure, just a little shorter than me and although she was not athletic, she kept her figure in a good shape. She had curves all at the right places, and as she was not skinny, I loved cuddling her in bear hugs. I felt her soft torso melt in my arms every time. She had long thick straight light brown hair that she kept letting grow. She did not have a fringe, just because I did not like it. Instead, she parted her hair sometimes in the middle, and sometimes on the side, and let the bangs flow past her ears. Her sweet oval face looked good with a nice forehead. She never wore makeup just because I always encouraged and complimented her natural beauty. She even used the mascara sparingly. However, she always smelled lovely. One whiff of her fragrance as she strolled past me or hugged me would get me sighing.
Her fragrance is what I could never forget. "You chose it remember?" She used to remind me always. It was the second reason I kept finding excuses to get close to her always, apart from the fact that she was a very tactile person. She had magic in her fingertips and her touch was sensual yet electric - it used to raise goose bumps in me all the time. Yet she did it so casually and without any real intention. I could feel the love in her heart through her touch just as much as she would melt mine with her warm piercing gaze every time she looked at me.
She loved me to hold her tenderly at her waist. When we were home alone, she would love to feel my arms wrapped around her tummy holding her from behind. I would snake my arms around her tummy from the back and she would place her hands over mine. I would pull her in my hug, and she would press into my arms. I would nuzzle my face over her shoulder and press my cheek on her cheek. That made her feel very warm and loved inside. She would place her hands on mine and stay in the hug for a long while. At times, she would turn and press herself face to face and let me give her one of my bear hugs, squeezing her at her waist, while she wrapped her arms around my neck. She would always press herself deep in my hug, our torsos pressed against each other.
I could tell when she wanted to feel my hand around her as she used to get close and gently nudge me or wrap my arm around her back as she pushed herself into me. It used to be so natural and innocent that no one really took notice. She loved taking my arm when we walked together. She used to put her arm around mine and hold my hand at times.
No matter what favours she asked me, I could never say no to her. Whenever she asked me for a favour, all I could say is "and in return..." teasingly. Every time her 'compensation' is what I used to look forward for doing her favours. Just as she did me favours, I used to return in kind.
As she was very feminine and artistic, her hobbies and interests would not really interest a guy. Nonetheless, I used to either tag along or ferry her about for it when she needed me to give her company because never once did she turn down an opportunity to spend time with me, no matter what I was planning on doing.
Theatre, symphonies and movies were her thing. I loved movies too. So there we had something in common. The choices were where the favours would usually start. I liked action, thriller and murder mystery. She preferred romance, comedy and chic-flicks. We both loved sci-fi and drama. Nonetheless, we always had a lovely time after the movie discussing it over dinner. That was the part I loved the most. After watching a good thoughtful movie, even she used to get into the discussion. We used to spend long hours critically analysing some good ones we had seen over the years. As she was creative and artistic, she used to interpret things very differently which always made me smile at her lateral outlook in life. It also taught me the subtle wisdom that I had come to appreciate from her so much.
Our sense of humour was quiet compatible. Although she thought I would die of starvation if I ever decided to be a stand-up comedian, I did manage to make her roll in laughter at times. Once you started Sam giggling on something, it would take a while for her to stop giggling, and I would giggle just looking at her. Mom and Dad used to roll their eyes and just leave us be, "oh here they go again."
Sam jack-jumped in conversations a lot - where I was logical and would hold a conversation for some time, she used to go off on a tangent very quickly and then make a comment where I used be like "huh? Where did that come from?" and then we used to laugh. It used to be interesting to figure out how she had landed on that topic from what was in discussion at the time.
I did not drink alcohol in our family that much, just because I never enjoyed the taste for it. Sam used to enjoy white wine and sometimes rosé. Our parents had not encouraged drinking wine at home as a habit. Although they had some, Sam was allowed only a glass occasionally; she and I enjoyed good food. Mom was an excellent cook and homemaker. She took care of us with all the love in the world.
Although we were raised with reasonable amount of discipline, we had open-minded parents who encouraged us to think big and beyond. That was also the reason why they rarely frowned on the closeness me and Sam shared between us. In their minds, we were close because we were twins and fencing it with rules would had just aggravated the situation.
I remember one afternoon, Sam and mom had spent hours in the kitchen cooking something. Apparently, it was a surprise for me that Sam was learning to make. Sam had discussed with mom what she wanted to cook and mom had asked her to create a list of ingredients.
"X, could you get me some stuff from the store please?" Sam yelled out from bottom end of the stairs in the lounge.
"What do you need?" I popped my head on the landing.
"Here's the list," she smiled as usual. "I need it soon." Those eyes, that smile, those looks. I had died.
"How soon?" I was in the middle of a game.
"Now." She exclaimed. "Mom and I need it now so we can cook it."
"Talk about last minute preparation." I exclaimed and got changed and came downstairs.
"Ok. Where's the list?" I said.
As she handed me the list, she started elaborating me the amounts and varieties as substitutes if they did not have her sort of ingredients.
I just looked at mom totally confused. She just shrugged her shoulders and smiled.
"Why don't you just come with me?" I looked at Sam with one of our visual cues. "That would make it so much easier."
Sam looked at mom. "Can I?"
"Might as well. If he cocks up the list, it will take twice as long to fix it. Anyway, until you get these things, we can't make a head start." Mom looked at her nonchalantly.
"Ok. Give me one minute." Sam ran upstairs and got changed. When she came down, my eyes lit up. She had changed into a casual sleeveless shirt with a discreet yet seductive V-neckline, which hugged her waist and was tucked inside a slender, figure-hugging pair of jeans. She had done her hair in one of her unique styles. She put on boots and she looked gorgeous. She smelled heavenly and she had a smile that lit up like sunshine.
"Come on then." She took my arm and we headed out.
"Bye mom. See you soon." I flew her a kiss.
"Don't be late. I have dinner to sort too." Mom warned us.
"Don't worry." Sam shouted her confirmation as we stepped out.
Sam never gave up an opportunity to spend time with me, staying in or going out, and neither did I.
That night when we were enjoying our dinner, dad made a comment about the fine dessert. "What's the occasion?"
"Sam made it for Alex because he likes it." Mom said to dad with a sly smile.
Sam just looked at me coyly while eating the chocolate cake she had made that evening along with the piña colada cocktail. She had made a special 'virgin' batch for me, as I liked the non-alcoholic cocktails better.
"What about the icing? That's the best part," dad exclaimed while enjoying the cake.
"Alex doesn't like icing." Sam said.
"So? We do." Dad looked at mom then her.
"Next time." Sam agreed.
Dad just looked at me then Sam, then mom, then smiled, shook his head and finished his dessert.
"I thought it wouldn't taste nice. It doesn't look as good as it should." Sam said while gently stroking my thigh under the table. She always sat scooted up next to me. She was trying to be humble about her cooking.
"It tastes lovely." I looked up and looked at our parents and then her, trying to be encouraging. "It's meant to be eaten not looked at. And it tastes heavenly." I tried to be complimentary.
"Thanks hon." She was glad that I had loved it. "You are always an easy pleaser."
Dad cleared his throat.
"And both of you too." She giggled. We all just laughed.
My closeness with Sam was developing steadily and consistently. We used to spend quite some time playing our video games on our console in her room. The cabinet was just next to the door and in front of the bed, against the wall. At times, we used to sit in the bed. She used to recline on my chest and sometimes she used to sit between my legs. We had gotten a beanbag and a large soft cushion that we usually used, to make it comfy to sit on the wooden floor at other times. Then Sam suggested we could make things interesting.
She suggested that we play the game in single-player mode but each one of us would use only one side of game pad. She would sit in my lap on the cushion, between my crossed legs, with her back pressed on my chest. I would cuddle her slightly in my arms and one of us would use their left hand to use the left controls while the other used their right hand to use the right controls on the game pad. When we tried it the first time, all we did was giggle and fall about laughing, seeing just how confusing the whole thing had gotten.
Once mom came up to see what the whole racket was about. When we explained her what we were doing, she just shook her head, smiled and told us to keep it down.
This new way of playing games was rather sensual. It meant that we had to place our other hand somewhere as it was not being used. I usually hugged her around her tummy and she placed her hand on my thigh.
When that way got boring, we decided to turn it into a 2-player mode. Now, each one of us used alternate sides on the two pads. Therefore, within the two of us and two pairs of hands, no single person controlled one game pad fully. Sam would use the left controls on one and right on the other. I would use exactly the opposite. We used to laugh our asses off at times while playing games like these. We called them 'mixed singles' and 'mixed doubles' in our coded way.
This new way also meant that we had increased the closeness even when playing games on our consoles. It provided me with a warm glow inside and I loved to play like that. We used to share the beanbag and the cushion at times. She used to press herself back on to my chest and I used to cuddle her deep in my arms. Our cheeks would brush at times depending on how we sat and then I would plant kisses on her cheek. She used to have her hair in a loose bun or in a rubber band so it would not cover her cheeks. We loved pressing our cheeks together and she would caress her palm on my cheek sometimes. She used to run her fingertips over and under my thighs gently. It sent shivers through my body. When I quivered, she used to giggle with laughter.
"Stop it. You are doing this just to tease me." I used to nudge her without much intention for her to stop. She used to turn her head and plant soft kisses on my cheek occasionally, or raise her palm and gently place it on my cheek. That used to be a cue for me to know when she wanted me to turn my face and kiss her cheek.The school was ending in few months time. We both had decided to continue our diplomas in the local college after summer. It sounded prudent in many aspects rather than make a big move to university. Financially it would give us the breather we needed.
Sam came to my room one evening. As she lay on my bed, I continued working at my desk.
"X", she called out to me softly.
"Yes hon." I replied without looking toward her, continuing with my work.
"What have you thought about doing this summer?"
I put my work aside and looked at her. She turned in the bed, propped her head on her hand and while resting on her elbow she looked at me.
"Nothing much. I have been looking for some work but none so far." I replied.
"Me neither." She replied. "I have tried but everywhere it's dry."
I looked at her. Usually she had something floating in her mind when she asked such dead-end questions.
"I was thinking,..." she continued, "...instead of wasting the opportunity for some work experience, and feeling disappointed about job market, why not we collaborate and do something together?"
I was intrigued. "What do you have in mind?" I turned to her with keen interest.
"Hear me out." She continued. "Why not invest our time in getting our house renovated?"
"In what sense?" I was perplexed.
"Well this place has not been redecorated for a few years now. We both have developed sufficient skills to be able to paint, wall-paper or redecorate simple areas like the lounge or our bedrooms."
"Sure." I acknowledged. "But that's going to cost money."
"Eureka, Archie." Sam chuckled with sarcasm.
I smiled realising her twisted humour.
"We will put forward a proposal with a plan and a budget to our parents." She continued to elaborate. "Then if they agree, we will buy the stuff and redecorate it ourselves. Two months of solid work should be able to sort this place. There are two of us. That's a lot of man-woman hours."
Now I chuckled at her political correctness. "Sounds possible. I'm assuming you already have sorted some plan out."
"You aren't just a pretty face are you?" she teased me again. "Well I was thinking why not start with re-arranging of the lounge, re-painting the house, say select rooms for now, and then see if we could have some of the carpets replaced."
"I'm in." I agreed. "When do we tell mom and dad?"
"Let's broach the topic at dinner tonight." She suggested winking at me.
"Deal."
After a moment of silence, she put forward another question to me, "Will you be ok spending time working with me?"
I looked around to her. "I would love to. Why wouldn't I be?"
"I don't know; just asking if you would rather do something else with your friends."
"I would be more than happy spending time with you." I said. "I mean working with you."
She smiled at me with a twinkle. "I was thinking, let's make it a standard 40 hrs-a-week routine. Evenings and weekends are ours to enjoy. That way we will get a feel of what a full time job feels like."
"Good idea." I nodded. "That doesn't sound too hectic."
Then as she lay there, for a moment, she murmured quietly, "Don't worry I will make it worthwhile. It will be fun working together."
I stood up from my desk, turned around, went close to her and lay down next to her in the bed. She rolled on her back, threw her hands over her head and looked at me. I lowered myself on her and hugged her tenderly.
"Every minute I spend with you is full of bliss." I whispered in her ear.
She wrapped her hands around my neck and hugged me with warmth. "I'm glad you think that. I love to spend time with you too."
I sat up and rested my elbow on the bed. "Even if this plan does not shape up, we will find something else to do together, how about that?"
She smiled in acknowledgement. Her eyes glowed with excitement. I lowered my lips, kissed her cheek and hugged her for a while. She ran her hands over my back wrapping her arms around my neck.
In the evening, after the dinner, Sam and I broached the topic to our parents. After listening to us carefully, dad looked at mom.
Then looking at us, he spoke with appreciation, "Kids, this house is yours too. If you feel you wish to make home improvements, I am all for it. However, I would like to see some budget and some plans so I know what I am getting myself into. Not that I don't trust you, but at the end of the day, the buck stops with us." He looked at mom. "So you understand when I say this, as long as it will be a good investment, we are all for it. What do you say?" he looked at mom.
"I'm fine with it too." Mom nodded.
"Then in a week's time, we will provide you with a plan and a rough budget." Sam suggested.
"How about I give you a budget right now, and you make it fit inside it? I ain't no president or prime minister to work forward." He chuckled.
Sam and I looked at each other. "Sure."
So dad gave us a rough budget.
"Is that maximum or there is a leeway?" Sam asked.
"There is a leeway but not too much. Work with the figure as max because I know you will go over that definitely anyway. I'm already assuming a surplus in the figure I have given you." He smiled looking at mom.
"Ok." Sam and I looked at each other. "We have our project."
"So is this your idea for the summer?" Dad asked.
"Yep." Sam replied. "Rather than waste time looking for jobs and getting depressed, we thought it would be nice to invest some time and resources in our own home."
"Great idea." Dad looked at mom with admiration.
"Plus we were thinking, we would like to start doing groceries for us." Sam added looking at me. I just nodded.
"Mom, you don't have to worry about getting it anymore. We will get it every week." Sam said squeezing my hand.
"That would be kind of you." Mom smiled.
"What magic mushrooms did you have for breakfast today?" dad giggled looking at mom and then us both.
"Oh dad. Stop teasing us. We are trying to contribute to the family and we realise we could make a start somewhere." Sam was girlish.
"I'm just pulling your leg, sweetheart." Dad leaned forward on the table. "Your consideration and help is always appreciated. You know that. It is nice to see you kids taking responsibility in the house, and without our prompts. That is something."
After the meals, Sam and I went upstairs to discuss about our project. We spent the majority of a week looking at ideas and calculating costs for them. Sam was always the creative one so she came up with a ton of ideas for the makeover. I got the maths sorted and the different options and combinations. It was fun working with her. I saw a very different side to her personality. Sam was a bright and inspiring person to work with. She had a very calm and relaxed approach to work. May be she enjoyed working with me since we were close to each other anyway, but the time we spent together was always full of excitement.
She took every opportunity to touch and hug me, get close and hold me. She ran her fingers though my hair, held my hand while walking, wrapped my arm around her and hugged me sometimes. It was all very warm and loving.
We had realised that we ended up using many skills to create the plan from the given budget. It helped us develop and strengthen our technical and personal skills. I had begun to realise the significance of such in-house projects as good substitutes for work placements.
Where Sam fell short, I would help her out. When my abilities fell short, she filled the gap. We made a good team and we loved working together. Apart from the learning we were gaining, we were also getting closer together.
When we were presenting the plan one evening, dad just stopped us and looked at the maths. "I trust you guys to make good decisions about the colours and aesthetic. I just want to make sure you have not missed anything critical in your consideration. That is all. So far, it looks good. Go ahead." He approved with confidence. "And remember, we are in this together. If you hit a wall, so as to speak (he air quoted 'wall') do not think it is your problem to solve alone. We will solve it together. You are never alone. This is not a test. It is an exercise to develop and learn." He smiled at us.
Sam hugged him. "Thanks dad."
The weeks that followed were really good. During the summer, Sam and I worked on our project every day. We had created daily and weekly planner so we had a target to reach every day. The first week proved challenging. We were falling behind by the end of the second week. Therefore, we sat down and re-did the schedule with some additional buffers. What seemed like an easy 5-week project now looked more like a 7-week one. Moreover, we had to scale a few bits down and reduce the scope slightly. Since this was not a test, Sam just smiled and said, "More quality time together." She hugged me and we both smiled at each other.
During work, we listened to our favourite music and took time to dance to some tunes. Occasionally, we used to chat about different things. I would watch her every gesture, her every expression and her every movement. She would enjoy my gazes, encourage my closeness and hugs and touch me at every opportunity. By the time we had finished the makeover, I had lost touch of time. I would look forward to spending time with Sam everyday without really paying much attention to what we were doing. She had a very unusual way to take the chore out of work and instead make it enjoyable.
When we were painting Sam's bedroom, I left a small kiss mark of my lips on the wall very close to her bed when the glossy paint had half-dried. It was placed so that when she lay in her bed on her side facing the door, she would notice it directly in front of her sight. I did not tell her about it. Two days later, Sam came into my room at dawn and climbed into my bed under the duvet. She kissed me softly on my cheek and said, "Thank you for the kiss."
I had just smiled. "You noticed it then huh."
The next time I had seen it, she had painted red outline of a perfect heart around the kiss mark, with the kiss mark just on the bottom right corner inside the heart.
While I was standing there admiring her idea, she came and stood by me, hugging me with her arms from behind me. "You kissed my heart," she said softly.
"You felt it then." I whispered, kissing her forehead as I pulled her by her waist by my side.
"uh huh." She nodded. "Deep inside."
When we had completed the work, we showed it to our parents, not that they did not see it being completed every day. The final amount did go a tad bit over, but dad actually smiled. "You have done extremely well I must say. This is not too over the budget. I had anticipated a lot more extra expense." He smiled. "And it does look professional, not just good and new. Well done guys." Our parents looked at us with pride.
We both were chuffed. We were thrilled about our success with our first real project. There were lessons we had learned in hindsight. Nevertheless, the most important thing that had happened was Sam and I had gotten closer to each other.
We got one more surprise - dad decided to 'pay' us our labour charge for the makeover. "You did it out of the goodness of your heart, without being prompted and without any expectation of reimbursement. I feel you deserve some remuneration for your hard work."
He had paid us both full-time wages for the hours we had spent working on the project. In addition, he gave a generous 'tip' for being such good kids. Mom and dad looked at us with complete admiration and we both were thrilled beyond words.
"This is way better than any work placement." I exclaimed. "We enjoyed the work and got paid for it." I laughed.
Sam and I hugged dad and mom and we enjoyed a lovely meal that evening.
We had installed an audio surround system for the TV with built in USB audio player in the receiver. I had purchased the speakers on the internet. Sam had selected a nice unit to house the entire media centre. We had digitised all of mom and dad's CD collection. The bookshelf was redecorated with glass doors. We had also managed to change the sofa to an L-shaped corner unit stretching the entire width of the lounge in front of the TV. There were two recliners built-in the sofa and Sam had loved the lounger-style end corner unit. We could seat five people in the lounge now.
Once the makeover was done, we all loved enjoying the new sofa. Sam would love to sit with me reclined in the lounger and then plonk herself in front of me reclining back on my chest. Dad loved his recliner and mom got used to it soon enough. "This is the life." Dad remarked occasionally when he relaxed after meals.
"It is really comfortable, isn't it?" Mom agreed with him. "Nice work you two."
Sam would feel chuffed and I would snuggle her while she cuddled close to me on the lounger.
Occasionally Sam had fallen asleep lying on me - sometimes on her back with my arms around her tummy, her hands pressed on my hands, or sometimes she would turn and lie on my chest, her head on my shoulder or nuzzled in my neck, her feet intertwined in mine and I would be holding her in a soft embrace. Her tender warmth would feel so loving against me at such times. I would not want to move all night. Seeing her sleep so peacefully in my arms would be such a complacent moment.
Mom would often throw a blanket on us before she and dad went to bed.
"I will carry her up later," I used to quietly whisper to mom.
I used to stay there for a while until such time I could feel Sam stir up. Sometimes she did not, so then I carried her in my arms to her bed.