The light was shining onto my eyes as I woke up, blinking a few times as I reach up to my head, pounding a little from a dull headache. Sadly, it wasn't the sunlight that woke me up, it was the familiar sound of my father's jeep pulling into the driveway outside.
Before I get into that, I should explain why this is bad, or at least why I immediately thought it was bad, not realising how much worse it actually was. My mother had left for the week of my birthday, I was quite sad about it at first as it was a big one, my 18th, but it couldn't be helped. My granddad had just had a heart attack and my uncle who has learning disabilities lives with him. He was in a stable condition but someone had to look after my uncle. So she's gone and it's just me and dad celebrating my 18th. It was nice and pretty low-key, he gave me what he thought was my first beer as we stayed up late and listened to music, chatting away about life and things. It was Thursday so we didn't stay up too late and that was my 18th. It wasn't great but I knew he was out Saturday night with his friends for his monthly get together. He told my mother that he wasn't going to go as it would just be me here on my birthday weekend, but secretly he went, giving me a crate of 16 beers and said I can have a few friends round as long as we didn't wreck the place.
A few hours later sitting at my laptop, word had spread, people were making plans and friends of friends of friends were being told about an empty house on Saturday. It's my 18th birthday celebration, I can handle waking up early with some friends and cleaning up the mess before dad is back, no problem! Plans get made and a few older people with decent jobs... well I say decent, they can afford alcohol at short notice, have agreed to come and supply the party. Saturday morning comes and I assure my dad everything will be fine, the neighbours won't hear a thing and my close friends start turning up. I say goodbye as we're all just innocently sitting around watching TV. As he leaves we're all on the edge of our seats watching the window out of the corner of our eyes, seeing his car pull out of the driveway and down the street. Party time!
We set the music up while drinking the beers, getting a nice buzz going before anyone even arrives. It starts off slow at first, the early eager and younger party goers showing up, standing around awkwardly in the kitchen, making terrible attempts at small talk with each other. Soon enough though more and more people turn up, 6 packs of beers in tow, then bottles of wine and spirits, vodka, rum, whiskey. Now it's a party. I'm in my zone, this is what I've always wanted for my 18th, I'm a social butterfly, a drink never escaping my hand as I flutter from one group of people I don't know to the next, getting these wishes of happy birthdays as I drunkenly explain that it's my 18th. I'm not even keeping track of the time or how many drinks I'm having as it all starts to get blurry. I remember being picked up and sat in the middle of a room as people form a crowd and sing to me. My drink is taken away as there is talk about me having to do something since it's my 18th, now I'm an adult. I laugh, just shaking my head and trying to join in and enjoy the party atmosphere, playfully fighting back hands reaching out for me as they carry me up to my parents bedroom.
That's where it all goes black, and then bright white after I open my eyes, hearing my dad's jeep. I'm in panic mode, trying to get up from off the sofa where I guess I must have fell asleep in the living room. I just fall off onto some empty beer cans when I notice I'm wearing some red high heels and a black mini pencil skirt. Shaking my head I start to wake up more, I have a black crop top on as well, over what seems to be a padded bra, with my long hair up in a high pony tail. I get onto my feet and check the mirror in the living room. My face is a mess of smeared makeup and what I will figure out later, dried cum. Before I even get to react to this mess of a reflection that I'm staring at, I'm interrupted by the door opening and my dad's voice calling out my name angrily.
Taking a deep breath, I turn around slowly as he raises his eyebrows up at me, I can see the change in his facial expression as he realises it's me.
"Uhm, hey Dad.." I manage out weakly. "I.. I don't know what to say, I thought it would just be a small party and things got out of hand..."
He doesn't say anything as he drops his jacket and just walks over to me, walking around me slowly before he's back in front of me.
"Why on earth are you wearing your mothers clothes... and her makeup?" He reaches forward and wipes something from my face, bringing his finger up to his nose as he takes a smell. "Charlie.. is there something we need to talk about?"
It's strange. His voice isn't angry, I think, a couple of brain cells unaffected by last nights drinking sparking to life together, making some dumb connection as I think I can see a way out of this mess.
"Dad.. I just.. I didn't think you guys would... uhm, would understand, this is just.. something that I've always wanted to do..?" I say, trying my best to sound convincing.
He studies my face more, his expression similar to how he looks at his sudoku each morning in the newspaper. I bite my bottom lip, a nervous habit of mine, as I can feel the unfamiliar texture of lip gloss and a faint salty taste on my tongue from my lip. Letting out a small cough that only enhances the thudding in my head, I decide to break the silence.
"I'm just going to head up to my room, and quickly get dressed, then I'll be straight down here to tidy up, I promise I'll have it done before you even know."
I go to turn away as I feel his hand gripping my slender wrist, stopping me in my tracks. He pulls me back in front of him. I look up as he towers over me, close in front of me.
"I got a phone call from Mum on my way home, she said she tried the home number first but no one answered so I had to lie saying I went out early to go shopping. She should be back soon, so we both have no time for you to get changed, you can do that once we've finished here."
My heart is racing now, as I walk around the living room, bending down in the tight clothes as I pick up all the beer cans and half empty glasses, the clothes stretching over my body each time I lower myself to the ground. I'm in some kind of hungover, shocked, automatic mode as me and my father don't say a word to each other as we clear up the mess. Before long the cans and bottles are collected, a couple of bin bags full of them by the door. He's in the kitchen wiping down the surfaces as I'm walking a vacuum over the carpet in these high heels. I don't know why I haven't taken them off, but it's not actually that hard to walk in them. I finish vacuuming a little before my dad is done in the kitchen. I walk over to the doorway there as he's just putting the last of the dirty glasses in the dishwasher.
"Hey Dad... all that is left is to take out the bin bags, I don't think I can carry both and I don't really want to go outside like... well, you know, like this.."
He turns around and walks over to me, looking over my shoulder as he sees the two full bin bags.
"I'm not going to be able to carry both either kiddo, it won't take long, come on." He says dismissively, taking my arm as we walk together over to the door. He looks down at me and smiles, a reassuring smile, as he gestures to the other bag after picking up the first. I shrug, knowing I can't really argue with him, picking up the bag as he opens the door. Surprisingly, he takes my hand and leads me outside. We're walking hand in hand down the pathway of our front garden in the harsh light of Sunday. And I'm dressed in a way I've dreamt about many girls from my school being dressed. I can even feel my dad's thumb ever so slightly moving up and down over the top of my hand as we walk. There's so many things going through my head right now, worrying about being seen, then worrying about being recognised, and how calm and accepting my dad is being about all of this. Thankfully we reach the bins, letting go of each other as we dump the bags in the recycling in them and walk back together, not holding hands this time, walking back inside as I pick up my pace and step inside a little ahead of my dad.
I turn around as I hear the door close behind me, seeing my dad standing there just looking at me still. He gives me the smallest of nods, like a nod of a approval.
"Okay, I think you can get changed now, but I don't think you should put those clothes in the washing basin, keep them in your room for now, and maybe have a shower. We will talk about this later though."
That's all I needed, I didn't even reply as I turned around and rushed up to my bedroom. I fall forward on my bed, collapsing on my front as I try to gather my thoughts. Last night was a mistake, last night was a big mistake, I think to myself as I eventually pick myself up. Why did I drink so much and let myself get used like this? I don't remember anything still but I'm no idiot, I can figure out what happened. I don't feel sore so at least I didn't get fucked, my throat is sore but I'm pretty sure I was smoking at times last night, but it's obvious someone came on my face. I try not to think about it as I undress out of the tiny, tight black outfit. I hide it away under my bed along with the heels, getting some comfier clothes and a towel as I head into the shower and clean myself thoroughly, heading back into my bedroom once I am done and falling asleep on the top of my bed.
A few weeks go by where nothing happens. I try to forget about everything, I had asked friends cautiously about the party but everyone I speak to just say that it was legendary, and everyone was really wasted and had a great time. I ignore the clothes under my bed and things start to get back to normal. I even get more comfortable being around my dad. My exams come up and I do as expected. Nothing too bad, nothing great either. I hadn't planned on going to college anyway, wanting to get straight into employment. Summer comes about and I spend my time mixed between hanging out with friends, enjoying the sun, and looking for work. But nothing is coming up.
One Monday morning, I wake up, looking at the time I think I have the house to myself. I head into the shower, walking out in just my boxers to head downstairs and start the thankless job search at the computer in the study. As I step inside I nearly jump out of my skin as my Dad is sitting in the chair in front of the computer, turning around in the chair as he smiles to me.
"Job search isn't going well then?" He says, matter-of-factly, folding his arms as his eyes run over my body, me just standing there in my boxer shorts, my wet long hair behind my ears and down my back. I watch as he gets to his feet and walks over to me, he takes my hand and leads me upstairs to my bedroom, not saying a word as we both sit down on my bed.
"There's still something we need to talk about, isn't there?" The question is hypothetical as before I can even think of how to respond, he carries on.
"And I've been thinking about it, and have came up with a way to solve both of your problems at once." Problems? I think to myself, I just need a job.
"Charlie, I don't want you living a lie, but I also know how hard it can be for young men to be comfortable in themselves enough to really let everyone around them, especially those who love them, see who they truly are."
"Dad.. I..." I start to say before he brings his finger up to my lips, stopping me and keeping his finger there.
"It's okay, and I have great news, but it will be a bit tricky. I have a new position at my job, where I've been given the task to hire a personal assistant. Usually nepotism would be a problem with me hiring a family member, but our HR team is huge at the moment on hiring people living... how do I say it... different life styles that may be a hurdle for them into getting employment, for example young men who prefer wearing clothes of the fairer sex."
My eyes are going crossed as I'm looking down at my dad's finger on my lips, listening to him as it dawns on me what he's saying. I move my eyes upwards into his, as he is just staring at me.
"I know, I know.. it won't be easy for you to be so open with your preferences, but you will be with me, and not only that, you will be earning money. In fact, me and your mother have already been talking about it. Don't worry, she isn't mad about her clothes, she actually admitted she hadn't noticed them gone since they were too small for her and quite old, so you can keep those. We also know the party must have been some reaction to your let down of an 18th, so as a late present, or presents, we've been shopping for you. It might not be perfect and what you want but once you start earning, you can add to your new wardrobe, but I think we have enough for looking good for the interview and suitable outfits for work. The interview is this afternoon, I've already spoke to my senior leader about the exceptional circumstances of this request and he agrees that it will be a good look for the company at our next employee review from HR, so it's practically all a formality!"
He even sounds excited at the end of him speaking. Before I can reply to him he's up on his feet, leaving me in my room before returning shortly with huge bags of clothes, makeup kits and accessories. He places them on the bed and lifts me up to my feet, taking hold of my slim hips as he pulls my body against his and leans down. I can feel the hot breath in my ear as he whispers.
"This is the first day of the rest of your life, Charlie, you don't have to pretend anymore, and I will be there to support you. Always."