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Chapter 47 - My head

My feelings get squashed like a bug, but why is it when it does happen and I get depressed why do I finally feel comfortable and relaxed, I sit in my room on my soft floor, writing these poems wondering what goes through my head, to make these weird yet interesting poems? but when I try to remember what I was thinking I draw a blank and only see snow falling from the sky, and me in the middle of the field looking up at them with tears rolling down my face. My thoughts start to increase and speed up as if it's a race track, then when I try to figure it out. it stops that scene that I could see and those thoughts that were running wild and free seemed locked up and confined, seeking the freedom it once had.