AND SO, Starling returned to the place where it all began for her, the
Baltimore State Hospital for the Criminally Insane, now defunct. The old brown
building, house of pain, is chained and barred, marked with graffiti and
awaiting the wrecking ball.
It had been going downhill for years before the disappearance on vacation of
its director, Dr Frederick Chilton. Subsequent revelations of waste and
mismanagement and the decrepitude of the building itself soon caused the
legislature to choke off its funds. Some patients were moved to other state
institutions, some were dead and a few wandered the streets of Baltimore as
Thorazine zombies in an ill-conceived outpatient program that got more than
one of them frozen to death.
Waiting in front of the old building, Clarice Starling realized she had
exhausted the other possibilities first because she did not want to go in this
place again.
The caretaker was forty-five minutes late. He was a stocky older man with a
built-up shoe that clopped, and an eastern European haircut that may have been
done at home. He wheezed as he led her to a side door, a few steps down from
the sidewalk. The lock had been punched out by scavengers and the door secured
with a chain and two padlocks. There were fuzzy webs in the links of the
chain. Grass growing in the cracks of the steps tickled Starling's ankles as
the caretaker fumbled with his keys. The late afternoon was overcast, the
light grainy and without shadows.
"I am not knowing this building well, I just check the fire alarums," the man
said.
"Do you know if any papers are stored here? Any filing cabinets, any records?"
He shrugged. "After the hospital, they had the methadone clinic here, a few
months. They put everything in the basement, some beds, some linens, I don't
know what it was. It's bed in there for my asthma, the mold, very bed mold.
The mattresses on the beds were moldy, bad mold on the beds. I kint breed in
dere. The stairs are hal on my leck. I would show you, but-?"
Starling would have been glad of some company, even his, but he would slow her
down. "No, go on. Where's your office?"
"Down the block there where the driver's license bureau was before."
"If I'm not back in an hour-"
He looked at his watch. "I'm supposed to be off in a half hour."
That's just about E goddamned nuff. "What you're going to do for me, sir, is
wait for your keys in your office. If I'm not back in an hour, call this
number here on the card and show them where I went. If you aren't there when I
come out-if you have closed up and gone home, I will personally go to see your
supervisor in the morning to report you. In addition-in addition you will be
audited by the Internal Revenue Service and your situation reviewed by the
Bureau of Immigration and . . . and Naturalization. Do you understand? I'd
appreciate a reply, sir."
"I would have waited for you, of course. You don't have to say these things."
"Thank you very much, sir," Starling said.
The caretaker put his big hands on the railing to pull himself up to sidewalk
level and Starling heard his uneven gait trail off to silence. She pushed open
the door and went in to a landing on the fire stairs. High, barred windows in
the stairwell admitted the gray light. She debated whether to lock the door
behind her and settled on tying the chain in a knot inside the door so she
could open it if she lost the key.
On Starling's previous trips to the asylum, to interview Dr Hannibal Lecter,
she came through the front entrance and now it took her a moment to orient
herself.
She climbed the fire stairs to the main floor. The frosted windows further cut
the failing daylight and the room was in semidarkness. With her heavy
flashlight, Starling found a switch and turned on the overhead light, three
bulbs still burning in a broken fixture. The raw ends of the telephone wires
lay on top of the receptionist's desk.
Vandals with spray cans of paint had been in the building. An eight-foot
phallus and testicles decorated the reception room wall, along with the
inscription FARON MAMA JERK ME OF.
The door to the director's office was open. Starling stood in the doorway. It
was here she came on her first FBI assignment, when she was still a trainee,
still believed everything, still thought that if you could do the job, if you
could cut it, you would be accepted, regardless of race, creed, color,
national origin or whether or not you were a good old boy. Of all this, there
remained to her one article of faith. She believed that she could cut it.
Here Hospital Director Chilton had offered his greasy hand, and come on to
her. Here he had traded secrets and eavesdropped and, believing he was as
smart as Hannibal Lecter, had made the decisions that allowed Lecter to escape
with so much bloodshed.
Chilton's desk remained in the office, but there was no chair, it being small
enough to steal. The drawers were empty except for a crushed Alka-Seltzer. Two
filing cabinets remained in the office. They had simple locks and former
technical agent Starling had them open in less than a minute. A desiccated
sandwich in a paper bag and some office forms for the methadone clinic were in
a bottom drawer, along with breath freshener and a tube of hair tonic, a comb
and some condoms.
Starling thought about the dungeonlike basement level of the asylum where Dr
Lecter had lived for eight years. She didn't want to go down there. She could
use her cell phone and ask for a city police unit to go down there with her.
She could ask the Baltimore field office to send another FBI agent with her.
It was late on the gray afternoon and there was no way, even now, she could
avoid the rush-hour traffic in Washington. If she waited, it would be worse.
She leaned on Chilton's desk in spite of the dust and tried to decide. Did she
really think there might be files in the basement, or was she drawn back to
the first place she ever saw Hannibal Lecter? If Starling's career in law
enforcement had taught her anything about herself, it was this: She was not a
thrill seeker, and she would be happy never to feel fear again. But there
might be files in the basement. She could find out in five minutes.
She could remember the clang of the high-security doors behind her when she
went down there years ago. In case one should close behind her this time, she
called the Baltimore field office and told them where she was and made an
arrangement to call back in an hour to say she was out.
The lights worked in the inside staircase, where Chilton had walked her to the
basement level years ago. Here he had explained the safety procedures used in
dealing with Hannibal Lecter, and here he had stopped, beneath this light, to
show her his wallet photograph of the nurse whose tongue Dr Lecter had eaten
during an attempted physical examination. If Dr Lecter's shoulder had been
dislocated as he was subdued, surely there must be an X-ray.
A draft of air on the stairs touched her neck, as though there were a window
open somewhere.
A McDonald's hamburger box was on the landing, and scattered napkins. A
stained cup that had held beans. Dumpster food. Some ropey turds and napkins
in the corner. The light ended at the bottom floor landing, before the great
steel door to the violent ward, now standing open and hooked back against the
wall. Starling's flashlight held five D-cells and cast a good wide beam.
She shined it down the long corridor of the former maximum-security unit.
There was something bulky at the far end. Eerie to see the cell doors standing
open. The floor was littered with bread wrappers and cups. A soda can,
blackened from use as a crack pipe, lay on the former orderly's desk.
Starling flipped the light switches behind the orderly station. Nothing. She
took out her cell phone. The red light seemed very bright in the gloom. The
phone was useless underground, but she spoke into it loudly. "Barry, back the
truck up to the side entrance. Bring a floodlight. You'll need some dollies to
move this stuff up the stairs . . . yeah, come on down."
Then Starling called into the dark, "Attention in there. I'm a federal
officer. If you are living here illegally, you are free to leave. I will not
arrest you. I am not interested in you. If you return after I complete my
business, it's of no interest to me. You can come out now. If you attempt to
interfere with me you will suffer severe personal injury when I bust a cap in
your ass. Thank you."
Her voice echoed down the corridor where so many had ranted their voices down
to croaks and gummed the bars when their teeth were gone.
Starling remembered the reassuring presence of the big orderly, Barney, when
she had come to interview Dr Lecter. The curious courtesy with which Barney
and Dr Lecter treated each other. No Barney now. Something from school bumped
at her mind and, as a discipline, she made herself recall it:
Footfalls echo in the memory
Down the passage which we did not take
Towards the door we never opened
Into the rose garden.
Rose Garden, right. This was damn sure not the rose garden.
Starling, who had been encouraged in recent editorials to hate her gun as well
as herself, found the touch of the weapon not at all hateful when she was
uneasy. She held the .45 against her leg and started down the hall behind her
flashlight. It is hard to watch both flanks at once, and imperative not to
leave anyone behind you. Water dripped somewhere.
Bed frames disassembled and stacked in the cells. In others, mattresses. The
water stood in the center of the corridor floor and Starling, ever mindful of
her shoes, stepped from one side of the narrow puddle to the other as she
proceeded. She remembered Barney's advice from years ago when all the cells
were occupied. Stay in the middle as you go down.
Filing cabinets, all right. In the center of the corridor all the way down,
dull olive in her flashlight beam.
Here was the cell that had been occupied by Multiple Miggs, the one she had
hated most to pass. Miggs, who whispered filth to her and threw body fluids.
Miggs, whom Dr Lecter killed by instructing him to swallow his vile tongue.
And when Miggs was dead, Sammie lived in the cell. Sammie, whose poetry Dr
Lecter encouraged with startling effect on the poet. Even now she could hear
Sammie howling his verse:
I WAN TO GO TO JESA
I WAN TO GO WIV CRIEZ
I CAN GO WIV JESA
EF I AC RELL NIZE.
She still had the labored crayon text, somewhere.
The cell was stacked with mattresses now, and bales of bed linens tied up in
sheets.
And at last, Dr Lecter's cell.
The sturdy table where he read was still bolted to the floor in the middle of
the room. The boards were gone from the shelves that had held his books, but
the brackets still stuck out of the walls.
Starling should turn to the cabinets, but she was fixed on the cell. Here she
had had the most remarkable encounter of her life. Here she had been startled,
shocked, surprised.
Here she had heard things about herself so terribly true her heart resounded
like a great deep bell.
She wanted to go inside. She wanted to go in, wanting it as we want to jump
from balconies, as the glint of the rails tempts us when we hear the
approaching train.
Starling shined her light around her, looked on the back side of the row of
filing cabinets, swept her light through the nearby cells.
Curiosity carried her across the threshold. She stood in the middle of the
cell where Dr Hannibal Lecter had spent eight years. She occupied his space,
where she had seen him standing, and expected to tingle, but she did not. Put
her pistol and her flashlight on his table, careful that the flashlight didn't
roll, and put her hands flat on his table, and beneath her hands felt only
crumbs.
Overall, the affect was disappointing. The cell was as empty of its former
occupant as a snake's shed skin. Starling thought then that she came to
understand something: Death and danger do not have to come with trappings.
They can come to you in the sweet breath of your beloved. Or on a sunny
afternoon in a fish market with "La Macarena" playing on a boom box.
To business. There were about eight feet of filing cabinets, four cabinets in
all, chin-high. Each had five drawers, secured by a single four-pin lock
beside the top drawer. None of them was locked. All were full of files, some
of them fat, all of them in folders. Old marbleized paper folders gone limp
with time, and newer ones in manila folders. The files on the health of dead
men, dating back to the hospital's opening in 1932. They were roughly
alphabetical, with some material piled flat behind the folders in the long
drawers. Starling skipped quickly along, holding her heavy flashlight on her
shoulder, walking the fingers of her free hand through the files, wishing she
had brought a small light she could hold in her teeth. As soon as she had some
sense of the files she could skip whole drawers, through the Y's, very few
K's, on to the L's and bam: Lecter, Hannibal.
Starling pulled out the long manila folder, felt it at once for the stiffness
of an X ray negative, laid the folder on top of the other files and opened it
to find the health history of the late I. J. Miggs. Goddammit. Miggs was going
to plague her from the grave. She put the file on top of the cabinet and raced
ahead into the M's. Miggs's own manila folder was there, in alphabetical
order. It was empty. Filing error? Did someone accidentally put Miggs's
records in Hannibal Lecter's jacket? She went through all the M's looking for
a file without a jacket. She went back to the Ys. Aware of an increasing
annoyance. The smell of the place was bothering her more. The caretaker was
right, it was hard to breathe in this place. She was halfway through the Y's
when she realized the stench was . . . increasing rapidly.
A small splash behind her and she spun, flashlight cocked for a blow, hand
fast beneath her blazer to the gun butt. A tall man in filthy rags stood in
the beam of her light, one of his outsize swollen feet in the water. One of
his hands was spread from his side. The other hand held a piece of a broken
plate. One of his legs and both of his feet were bound with strips of sheet.
"Hello," he said, his tongue thick with thrush. From five feet Starling could
smell his breath. Beneath her jacket, her hand moved from the pistol to the
Mace.
"Hello," Starling said. "Would you please stand over there against the bars?"
The man did not move. "Are you Jesa?" he asked.
"No," Starling said. "I'm not Jesus."
The voice. Starling remembered the voice.
"Are you Jesa!" His face was working.
That voice. Come on, think. "Hello, Sammie," she said. "How are you? I was
just thinking about you."
What about Sammie? The information, served up fast, was not exactly in order.
Put his mother's head in the collection plate while the congregation was
singing "Give of Your Best to the Master."
Said it was the nicest thing he had. Highway Baptist Church somewhere. Angry,
Dr Lecter said, because Jesus is so late.
"Are you Jesa?" he said, plaintive this time. He reached in his pocket and
came out with a cigarette butt, a good one more than two inches long. He put
it on his shard of plate and held it out in offering.
"Sammie, I'm sorry, I'm not. I'm-"
Sammie suddenly livid, furious that she is not Jesus, his voice booming in the
wet corridor:
I WAN TO G0 WI JESA
I WAN TO GO WIV CRIEZ!
He raised the plate shard, its sharp edge like a hoe, and took a step toward
Starling, both his feet in the water now and his face contorted, his free hand
clutching the air between them.
She felt the cabinets hard at her back.
"YOU CAN GO WITH JESUS.. IF YOU ACT REAL NICE," Starling recited, clear and
loud as though she called to him in a far place.
"Uh huh," Sammie said calmly and stopped.
Starling fished in her purse, found her candy bar. "Sammie, I have a Snickers.
Do you like Snickers?"
He said nothing.
She put the Snickers on a manila folder and held it out to him as he had held
out the plate.
He took the first bite before he removed the wrapper, spit out the paper and
bit again, eating half the candy bar.
"Sammie, has anybody else been down here?"
He ignored her question, put the remainder of the candy bar on his plate and
disappeared behind a pile of mattresses in his old cell.
"What the hell is this?"
A woman's voice. "Thank you, Sammie."
"Who are you?" Starling called.
"None of your damn business."
"Do you live here with Sammie."
"Of course not. I'm here on a date. Do you think you could leave us alone?"
"Yes. Answer my question. How long have you been here?"
"Two weeks."
"Has anybody else been here?"
"Some bums Sammie run out."
"Sammie protects you?"
"Mess with me and find out. I can walk good. I get stuff to eat, he's got a
safe place to eat it. Lot of people have deals like that."
"Is either one of you in a program someplace? Do you want to be? I can help
you there."
"He done all that. You go out in the world and do all that shit and come back
to what you know. What are you looking for? What do you want?"
"Some files."
"If it ain't here, somebody stole it, how smart do you have to be to figure
that out?"
"Sammie?"
Starling said. "Sammie?"
Sammie did not answer. "He's asleep," his friend said.
"If I leave some money out here, will you buy some food?"
Starling said.
"No, I'll buy liquor. You can find food. You can't find liquor. Don't let the
doorknob catch you in the butt on the way out."
"I'll put the money on the desk," Starling said. She felt like running,
remembered leaving Dr Lecter, remembered holding on to herself as she walked
toward what was then the calm island of Barney's orderly station.
In the light of the stairwell, Starling took a twenty-dollar bill out of her
wallet. She put the money on Barney's scarred, abandoned desk, and weighted it
with an empty wine bottle. She unfolded a plastic shopping bag and put in it
the Lecter file jacket containing Miggs's records and the empty Miggs jacket.
"Good-bye." "Bye, Sammie," she called to the man who had circled in the world
and come back to the hell he knew. She wanted to tell him she hoped Jesus
would come soon, but it sounded too silly to say.
Starling climbed back into the light, to continue her circle in the world.