One by one people started to leave the still fresh grave until there were only me and my supervisor. I looked at the grave mournfully. Like other graves in this cemetery, there was no tombstone on it. It was deliberately made to be unknown graves so no one outside people in our organization knew who lied in there.
In this particular grave in front of me lied Zidane, my supervisor's left hand, my team mates. Actually, he was my vice commander in our super team. Just like my supervisor said, our chapter created a group of twelve men that had their brains being altered. I didn't know what they did to our brains, but it made us had super power. Like mutants, you know ... like real-life x-men. Some could disappear, some could fly, moved things with their minds, had laser came out of their eyes, etc. Zidane could bring out a samurai from his hands, while my self ... I could turn anything I touched into dust whenever I wanted to.
With those scary super powers, soon our team was famous among our organization. No mission couldn't be done. We were front liners in many open wars the organization had and we never lost. Well.. that happened for about one and a half year.
About six months ago, tragedies started to happen in our team. One by one, our members started to lose their control over their powers. Thus, Zidane and I had to put them down. Knowing this fact, my supervisor dismissed the team at once and our members were put to an isolation for observation. Still, I got news that they were died in the isolation. The gossip was they were being extremely violent and fought to each other. Another gossip said they were exploded. I didn't know which ones was true. Until one day..
That day, Zidane and I were in a meeting with my supervisor. We were talking about the next issue. Actually, I already had a thought that Zidane being slightly strange that day. He was being a little agitated, unlike the super calm Zidane used to. But he said he was fine, so I didn't mind about it.
When we were in the middle of conversation, suddenly Zidane stood up. His face was full of agony. Before we could react, he suddenly attacked my supervisor. Fortunately, Derrick, her private bodyguard's reflex was quick. He turned his body as a shield for my supervisor. Thus, Zidane's samurai that was all of a sudden appeared from his body pierced Derrick's back.
Two of bodyguards tried to hold Zidane, but he was too quick. He split their bodies in two with one move. I immediately approached him. And Zidane, like didn't recognize me, pointing his samurai toward me. I grabbed the samurai and turned it into dust. "Zidane !!" I barked at him while holding his hand.
"I'm sorry.. I'm sorry... I can't control my self" Zidane murmured. With three other bodyguard, we managed to lock his body so he couldn't move anymore.
"What were you ..." I halted my intent to rebuke him when I saw his face expression started to change again. His samurai appeared and disappeared uncontrollably al though he couldn't move his hand at all.
"Zidane.. control your self!" I barked him again, putting both my palm onto the spot where his samurai came out.
"I can't. Commander.. I ... I ... "
Zidane suddenly stopped talking. His eyes were all white and blood were coming out from his nose and mouth. He just died.
After being autopsy, the organization's forensic said the cause of Zidane's death was because brain explosion.
----------
"I'm afraid your brain cells' activity is also uncontrollable, Sir," A bald man that stood next to my supervisor in front of me said in a regretful tone. Although I had prepared my self about it since I had the surgery, hearing the news itself still sunk my heart.
"I'm sorry, Iggy," my supervisor said, stretching her arm, about to touch my lower arm that was on her table. I deliberately moved my arm to avoid her touch.
"We.. we suggest you to join our isolation facility, Sir," The bald man continued.
"Can you cure me if I join it ?" I asked him.
The bald man shook his head. "I'm afraid not.. But at least, you .."
"How long do I have?" I cut his words with another question.
"Three months.. six months at most," he said.
I made small nods as a sign of my understanding. I then turned my head to my supervisor. "I am useless now. Can you at least let me live the rest of my live peacefully with my family ?" I asked her my final request.
My supervisor stared at me. Her face was reddish trying to hold her emotion. "Iggy.."
"Well ?" I urged her.
My supervisor finally nodded. after in silence in some minutes, just staring at me with pitiful gaze, "Of course you can.." She said. She quickly wiped a tear that about to fell from her eyes. For more than 20 years I worked with her, it was the first time I saw her shed a tear. she was human after all.
----------
The hardest part for me was telling the news to Sophia. I knew I couldn't tell her all the truth, but she needed to know that I was dying. Even in my last moment in life, I still had to lie to my love ones. But I had to, for their sakes.
So, I finally told her when we were about to sleep. We were just having our session about fifteen minutes ago.
"Pumpkin.. I 'm dying," I whispered to her ear while rubbing her hair.
Sophia chuckled. "Your performance hasn't changed, Honey. Yo are still fantastic," she said.
"No, Pumpkin.." I said to her. I moved my body so I could stared her in the eyes. "I am dying.. literally dying."
She poked my nose. "Don't make that kind of joke. It's not funny," she rebuked me.
"No, Pumpkin. I'm .. I'm not ... " I couldn't hold my tear not to fall.
Those tears made Sophia realized I was serious.
"What.. what.. what are you talking about ?" Sophia got panic seeing my tear.
"I ... I had ... brain cancer ... last stage," I uttered my lie. Sophia bulged her eyes. "I'm ... I'm dying, Pumpkin.."
"No.. No!! You're joking, right?! Tell me you're joking !!" She said, trying to deny my news. I shook my head several time to ensure her.
"No, Honey ... No!!" Sophia shouted then bursted a cry. I reached her head and placed it on my chest. Then we cried together.
----------
Six months later.
"Mom.. Erick invites me to his prom this Friday," Jennifer said to Sophia when we had our dinner.
"Who's Erick ?" I asked.
"My boyfriend, Dad," Jennifer said with wincing eyes.
"Can I go, Mom ?" she asked again to her mom. Sophia turned her head to me.
"As long as you were home before nine," I uttered my term.
Jennifer winced. "The prom just started at nine !" she protested.
"What kind of prom just started at nine ?" I asked.
"A NORMAL kind of prom, "Jennifer answered with an annoyed tone. She then turned her head back to Sophia. "Can I go, Mom ? Please.."
I grabbed glass in front of me, about to drink its contain. But when I touched it, the glass suddenly disappeared, turned into dust. "SHIT !!" I shouted in shock.
"What is it, Honey ?" Sophia asked me when she heard my shout.
"No.. No.. Nothing !" I answered her, hiding my wet hand under the table. "The answer is NO," I said to Jennifer.
"WHAT ?!?!" Jennifer asked in disbelief.
"You heard me. I said NO," I repeated my answer.
"But, Daaaad..."
"No. You are not allowed to go to the prom! and that's FINAL," I said in stern.
"I hate you and your rules, Dad!! It is way better for me when you are not around !!" Jennifer shouted.
"Jen !!" Sophia was about to rebuke Jennifer, but she had stood up and left the dining table. Sophia turned her head toward me. "Honey..."
"With that kind of attitude, I am more than sure she is not allowed to go to the prom," I said to her. I stood up and also left the table. I needed to chaos Sophia's mind to make her didn't realize the missing glass.
-----------
With a lot of trouble, I finally able to put all CDs into secret safety box. The CDs were my secret letter to Sophia and Jennifer. I had put a quite clear clue for them, a framed-painted quote "The Life of My Love". I encrypted my letter into scanned photographs that were captured by Sophia. Only Sophia and Jennifer knew about those photographs and where they were kept. So, when somehow someone could decode the password, they couldn't know my letter since they couldn't decrypt it.
I wandered my gaze around my office for the last time. Yes, it was the last time I entered this room. I had clear everything, every clue about me and prepared the secret letter since three months ago.
After heavily exhaled for couple of times, I opened the door, once again with so much trouble. Not because I have stiffed hands, but I have to put so much effort to control my power so I wouldn't turn the door into dust. It was a really huge effort that took a lot of my energy.
Limping, I walked toward my bathroom. With heavy groan, I finally succeeded to climb onto my tub and lied there. Sweat already dampened back of my shirt. After resting for a little while, collecting some of my energy back, I turned the water faucet. While listening to the sound of water that ran out from the faucet to fill the tub, I was recalling about my beautiful marriage live.
Our marriage was definitely the best thing ever happened in my short 40 years of life. I even didn't regret the lost of our baby, since that brought me Jennifer, the most perfect daughter a father could have. I loved both of them with all of my heart. What I regretted were .. I wish I could spend more time with them and ... and ... if only I didn't have to keep these many secrets from them.
I was far from perfect husband and father. But I had tried my best to make them happy. Except for this time. I sighed. If only I could die without putting any trauma or tragedy to them. If only.. I didn't have to die like this. But, I knew that this was for the best.
I looked at my trembling hand. My brain was becoming harder to be controlled day by day. I was out of excuses to tell Sophia about things around me that suddenly went missing. I didn't dare to sleep, afraid that I might touch Sophia and turned her into dust.
The tub was almost full. Once again, I put all my focus to turned off the faucet. I pressed my lips to make a thin smile. When I closed my eyes, two drops of tear fell from the corner of them. I inhaled a long breath before drowning my head completely under the water.
Yesterday, I told Sophia about this plan. She was of course rejecting it at first. But after a long and twinging talk of understanding, she finally approved it.
I started running out of breath, but I kept my head under the water. My smile got wider when my mind was full of beautiful memories I had with my two most beloved persons. The first time I met Sophia. The moment when I introduced my self to her. Days and nights we spent together. Her face when she saw this house for the first time. Our wedding. Jennifer's first chuckle to me. Her spoilt voice every time she called me "Daddy!". How she loved being twirled around in the air, even until now.
I coughed when some water started to enter my trachea. Still, I forced my head to stay underwater. The memories then started to drifted to other moments of my life, the least beautiful ones. Started from how I joined the organization and every gaze of my victims whom saw me before they died. My lung was burning as water started to fill it. I deliberately forced my mouth and nose to suck the water in, ignoring how every muscle of my body was trying to reject it. The pain was unbearable, but it was quick. Soon, I felt no pain no more.
@@@@@AUTHOR'S NOTE@@@@@
This chapter somehow is so emotional for me, almost brought me to tears