When I wake up, I realize quickly that Lucien's nestled himself into my bare chest, and I feel my cheeks heat up as I try to decide how to extricate myself.
Apparently hearing my heartbeat shoot up as well, Lucien chuckles. "Did you know," he murmurs, "that the custom of taking blood from the neck is relatively new?"
I just silently wait for him to continue. I know why he's doing this, and I don't want to give him the satisfaction. Still, my heart gives me away, and he smiles into my skin.
"People are far more sensitive about the torso than they used to be," he continues, moving himself to just below my collarbone. "Anyone could be bare-chested and no one would bat an eye." He murmurs into my chest now, and I unconsciously squeeze him at the feeling of his lips on such a sensitive spot. "This used to be a much easier target. Don't you want to know what it feels like?"
Somehow, my heartrate shoots up even higher. "Can't you just bite and get it over-ah!" I twitch as he just grazes me with his fangs.
"Oh? Not going to fight me?" I can feel Lucien's gaze, but I pointedly keep my face turned away. "Don't you know how much harder you're making it for yourself when you just let me?"
"You enjoy it more when I fight," I reply stubbornly. "I figure if I'm going to..mmm, Lucien!" He's sucking at my skin now, not even pretending that he's going to bite. "J-just bite, dammit!" I stutter.
"If you won't fight, I'll just keep pushing," he hums with delight. "Are you sure that's a good plan?" He opens his mouth again, to tease me with his teeth-
And I put my hand behind his head and push him into me, forcing him to break my skin. He makes a small sound of surprise before he tastes my blood, and unexpectedly groans with pleasure as he takes a drink.
"Well played, Adelaide," he murmurs hoarsely. "That almost..mmmm.." He dives back in to drink more, and I just pray he's hungry enough that he'll shut up for a while.
And he does, for a little while. But he still pulls away far too soon. "That was rather dangerous, you know," he murmurs, finally coming to my face level. "A lesser vampire might have all but drained you just then."
"It wasn't really that bad...was it?" I ask hesitantly, and Lucien's eyebrows rise.
"It's dangerous to mix hunger and lust. You know that."
"Y-yes, but-" I stutter, "you were just talking about being casual about chests, and I wanted you to shut up, and, I mean, it's you-"
He cuts me off. "Adelaide, you pushed my face into your breast."
"Ughh…" I cover my face with my hands. "My points still stand," I mumble through my fingers. "You have always been the king of control anyway. I… I didn't think it would work," I add sheepishly.
"Hmmm." I peek through my fingers to see him studying me. "I suppose I can't blame you. But I'm sure I don't need to tell you not to pull that with the others. Not even Dante."
I shake my head vehemently, but he continues.
"It would be messy if you were killed so soon," he says, looking down on me with the same deep gold eyes as always. But this time I feel the chill in his words. As thralls, we know that there's blood on the hands of every vampire we serve. But sometimes a moment arises like this, where you suddenly become acutely aware that you're being held by someone who has murdered before, probably with ease.
"Are you afraid?" he murmurs, coming closer to stare me down.
"...No."
"You hesitated."
"Because I know I should be." I can't look away from his face. There's almost conflict in his expression - but again, I can't place it. But it does hold an immense weight. I can almost feel it, as he leans over me.
I realize I've put my hand to his face. "Ah.." I start to pull away, but he puts his hand over mine.
"Yes. I like you far too much." Lucien pulls me close again, but just for an embrace. He takes a deep breath in the crook of my neck before he releases. "Shall we get you breakfast, then?"
I nod and follow him into the main room.
As usual, I pass through straight into the kitchen, but when I've finished my food, Lucien's not there.
"...Did he say where he was going?" I ask the others, but they all shake their heads. "I'll find him when I finish," I shrug, and take a seat between Adrian and Virgil.
"Oh?" Adrian pokes my cheek. "Usually you make me come to you. What's changed?"
"I wanted to make it clear that I do care for you both," I answer simply. "I'm giving up on pretense."
"Pretense…?" asks Virgil.
"I was forcing myself to put up walls that I didn't want to, because I was scared. But I'm giving up on that, even if I get hurt."
Virgil takes my hand and squeezes it, but doesn't have anything to say.
"Adelaide, I would never hurt you on purpose," pleads Adrian. He sounds genuinely worried, and his eyes search mine when I turn back to him
"I know, but that's not the only way people can get hurt. I don't distrust you."
Dante speaks up. "I'm glad you took my words to heart, little bird, but you should know they're going to get very attached."
"I'm already attached," huffs Adrian, and I feel Virgil squeeze my hand again.
"You say that like it's a bad thing, Dante. It's not like I'm forcing anything," I reply.
"You're only saying that because you want to take her home," says Virgil. "You didn't care before."
"I didn't know how affectionate she could be, before," Dante replies quietly.
"That's..that's just normal, Dante…" I begin, and he sighs and leans on his hand.
"Yes, you're both right, I suppose." But he looks a little sour.
"You just want to monopolize her," Virgil says. When I look over to him, there's a glint in his eyes. "You want to own her."
"I do," he replies evenly, and I feel my heart start to roil. I start to speak up, but Dante continues. "I want to keep her affection here, where she can use it on people who will return it."
That stops my anger and hurt dead in its tracks. I didn't think he cared about that. I suppose it was obvious to see, but I didn't realize he was even looking.
Virgil doesn't have a response either, at first. Finally, he speaks up. "Fine. But you'll probably lose interest later."
"For both of our sakes, I hope so," he chuckles, and leaves the room.
I've been so caught up in the conversation that I've only eaten about half of my food. I go back to it in silence, musing. I still don't understand why… I look to the two on either side of me. I don't understand them, either. Is this simply a matter of the isolation? But I also know that I could have easily been put with people who wouldn't listen, or would have rubbed me the wrong way, or vice versa. How much can I believe that this is true? Dante, strangely enough, is the easiest to believe. He doesn't understand it either.
"You're doubting again," pouts Virgil. "I can see it in your expressions."
I shrug. Adrian just strokes my hand understandingly.
"I can't help how I feel," I reply quietly. "This is part of letting things move naturally, too."
"Hmm." Virgil's tension on my hand finally eases up. "Well, I suppose I can understand that. You're strangely insecure for being so confident."
I let out a short wry huff. "Confident, huh? I suppose it does seem that way." I stand up, having finally finished eating. "I need to go find Lucien."
I don't know why, but I feel sure that I know where he is. I head for the music room, and even though it's silent inside, he's there when I open the door, laying across an armchair like it's a lounge.
"Do...you want to try that dance again?" I ask hesitantly, but he shakes his head.
"I simply thought this was the best room to rehearse in." But he won't meet my eyes, which for him, is highly unusual.
I come to his chair, and pat at his legs, to get him to make room for me. He sits up with a slight frown.
"You're melancholy," I say as I settle into his lap.
"Yes," he replies, and I can see in his eyes, So? Do you really plan on asking me why?
I don't. "Do you want to cheer up, or do you want to pitch fully into sadness?" I ask.
Lucien finally meets my gaze with faint surprise before breaking into a wry smile. "So you do know me."
"Yes." I bonk my forehead into his. "But that's not an answer."
"I am curious to see how you would try to cheer me up," he replies.
"Well, I'm not promising it will work," I sigh, and stand up. "But I'm restless anyway." I tug on his hand to follow me outside.
But as soon as I close the door, I take off running. He'll figure it out. I tuck myself into a space between two shrubs and wait. Soon enough, he walks over. His ankles are almost within reach….
"What exactly are you doing?" he asks, looking down at me through the leaves.
"I'm tired of sitting around all day," I reply. I snake my arm out, grab his ankle, and yank. Unprepared, he falls to the ground with a thump.
I break out laughing, but run off to a new place before he can react. I'm never going to forget the look of sheer surprise on his face when his ass hit the ground.
This time, I've scampered up into a tree. Lucien walks up to the foot of the tree with his arms crossed, but his expression is pleasant. "Living up to your nickname?"
"Nope." WIth a grin, I leap out of the tree, just barely soaring over his head, and land on the ground with a roll. I take off running again, aiming for a corner of the garden with stones lining the garden path. I can't hear his footsteps, but he must be close.
I scoop up a stone and spin around, hurling it as hard as I can at him. He's only a foot away. Lucien catches it with a grin and lunges forward, grabbing my ankle. I let him pull me towards him, but as soon as he lets go of my ankle to grab my wrists, I curl forward and lunge out between his legs. Or rather, I try to. He grabs me by the waist, and stands, holding me upside down like a kitten.
"Did you really think that would work?" he asks.
"It will if you let it," I giggle, kicking at his head.
He turns his head to the side to avoid my feet. "You really aren't afraid?" Without waiting for an answer, he tosses me into the air, flipping me head over heels. The world whirls around me for a few seconds before he catches me, right side up this time. He waits for me to catch my breath with his usual catlike smile.
"Well...it's not as exciting if there's absolutely no fear, right?" I reply. "But more importantly," I giggle, flicking his nose, "I got you."
"I didn't think you would do something so childish," he replies evenly.
But I feel my grin only widen. "I know, that's what made it so funny. I can't believe I made an ancient vampire fall on his ass!" I start trying to wiggle out of his grasp.
"You're like a restless dog," Lucien chuckles, and finally lets me drop to the ground. Still, he won't let go of my wrist. "Maybe we just need to play with you more, hmm?" he adds, eyes narrowing suggestively.
"Maybe." I drop to the ground, using my weight to pitch him off-balance. With my back to the ground, I put my feet on his chest and shove, flipping him off his feet and over my head. He lets go to catch himself, but I'm not fast enough to get up before he lunges for me again.
This time, he pins my arms to the side and crouches behind me. "Why, exactly," he says into my ear, "did you choose this to 'cheer me up'?"
"Hmmm…" I think as I wiggle around uselessly. "Because it's the opposite of melancholy, I suppose."
"Adrenaline heightens emotions, but it doesn't necessarily engender positive ones," he replies.
"I know." I dig my heels into the ground and shove backwards, pushing us both onto our backs. "But at least it's something strong, right?" I start trying to rock back and forth as I struggle. "And I think we're all restless here. We're tired of just sitting around."
"That's true," he admits. I feel him time his own movement with me, and the world flips around again as he pulls me back into a crouch. This time, though, I'm left kneeling on the ground, which gives me far less leverage. "But you don't think it's dangerous, to do this kind of thing with me?" He releases my arms and squeezes me gently around the waist.
"You may shapeshift into a panther," I giggle, "But it's not like you actually have some kind of hunting instinct I'll accidentally release," I reply. "I've been living with vampires for long enough that I know that kind of thing is a myth. It's not instinct, just a series of decisions like anything else people do."
"That's not the kind of dangerous I meant," Lucien says in a low voice, and kisses my shoulder. He lingers there for a moment, and I feel the heat in my cheeks rise with realization. He smiles slightly, but doesn't move away, instead moving along the line of my neck, drawing his tongue along my skin.
"I...I didn't…"
"You didn't think about it, did you?" he murmurs into my neck. I feel his hands start to rove over me, pulling me closer to him. "For someone so clever, you can be quite foolish."
"I still can't believe it," I stutter.
Lucien pushes me over, forcing me onto my hands and knees. He sighs into the nape of my neck, curling around me tightly. "I know. But I'm impatient."
He lets me turn around so that I'm lying on the ground. Finally able to meet his gaze, I ask, "Why? Why are you so impatient? Dante said the same thing."
"Because you are temporary, Adelaide," he responds, with a look that tells me I should know better than to ask.
"I know, but...it's not like the journey there is unpleasant...right?" I search his eyes. "Why do you want to push it forward so badly?"
"Because I know I don't have to wait," he replies, his brow slightly furrowed. "I don't want pieces when I can have it all." Lucien leans in and kisses me deeply, snaking his hands under my back to pull me closer to him.
Hesitantly, I let myself respond in kind, relaxing into his touch. I squeeze him back, and slip my hands under his tunic. Lucien lets out a small hum, arching under my touch as I explore his skin. He's much softer than I expected him to be with such a lean physique. He responds with his mouth whenever I find a tender spot, twirling his tongue around mine and sucking on my lips. I reach his hips before I realize what I'm doing.
Lucien pulls away as well, eyes glittering. "Do you want to move to the bedroom?" he asks.
"Well...I can't," I reply in a small voice.
"Why not?" he asks, but he's grinning. He already knows the answer.
I cover my face in my hands, grumbling, "You already know why."
"Oh, Adelaide." He draws his finger down my torso. "You know that's not the only way we could have fun."
I gulp as I feel heat swell inside of me. "Yes, I know, but...I'm still overwhelmed."
"Don't you want to find out what this much experience feels like?" he murmurs, leaning closer.
That reminds me! "Lucien, actually," I say, pushing him back. "You are a liar."
"Hmmm?" He grins in return. "How, exactly? I may manipulate, but I don't generally need to lie."
"You like men too, don't you?" I narrow my eyes at him, and his grin widens. "You said you only liked women that day."
"I didn't say anything," he clarifies, but I thump on his chest.
"You know you implied it," I huff, and he chuckles.
"Yes, you're right, but that doesn't make much difference here, does it? I may not be straight, but the other men here are...unfortunately." He sighs and pokes my cheek. "So all that's left is you," he adds with a grin.
"Lovely," I sigh. "But I still need...rest."
"Fine," he replies, scooping me up. "Why don't we rehearse, then? After you eat, that is."
"I can walk," I begin, but he shakes his head.
"You need to preserve your energy. I still haven't had my fill." He smiles down at me. "But I'll let you eat first."
"Oh, how magnanimous," I drawl, and he chuckles as he carries me inside.