How many people have died because of me? And how many of them I killed myself with my blades. I don't know anymore.
I fought against him for so many years, but I was never allowed to know the name. But now there is no point in thinking about the past. After all, I'm dead. The arrows that pierced my body are probably to blame. But why can I even think for myself and see myself? So, I can move. Does that mean I'm a ghost now? Do I even come to Aza, the realm that is available to a warrior as a place and home after death? Maybe I must wait for something. Or am I trapped here in the world forever as a spirit?
But until my fate is decided, I can look at how the battle is going. What I already know is the fact, that I cannot offer support to my followers, nor can I do anything to the enemies. Is that a punishment? However, I want to displace the idea that there is nothing to do after my death, at least for now. There must be anything that I am able to do for my comrades!
For now, I leave the place of my death and explore the battleground. Hopefully the opponents are already defeated. And hopefully my opponent, who surprised me with the secret archers, went down with them.
Unfortunately, this is not the case. My whole unit, including Lye, has fallen. Damn it! You all were still young and full of life. You could have achieved so much in this world. Especially you Lye... my only real friend I ever had. Hopefully he has maintained the peace that I am denied. I hope he is in Aza now and waits for me. I still don't know why I'm being held on the battlefield as a ghost.
What is this dark fog? It suddenly appears out of nowhere. It gathers in the room where I took my last breath. My body is completely enveloped by this fog and it seems to be lifting. Slowly it turns his head right into my direction. I watch myself right into the eyes. But instead of seeing my blue eyes, they're just black. Death black. But soon after I investigated them some sort of force pushes me and I'm losing my balance. Now my spiritual figure is also surrounded by the fog. Steadily it gets closer and closer and finally it covers my entire body.
Now the light is completely extinguished. This must be my way to Aza! I relax quite calmly and let myself fall into the fog. Soon I will come to you, Lye! Trust me. We will soon eat and drink together again as friends with all our comrades. Just as we did yesterday and so many times before. To be honest, death is better than being in this world of war. In this world there was way too much suffering. Every day we fought for our survival. Whether it was in combat or at our side jobs.
My fall seems to go into the infinity. Slowly the feeling of falling also decays and it slowly feels like I am floating in an empty space. I don't know how to describe that, but it feels like all my worries have gone away. They all disappear into the seemingly endless space. Beautiful. Flashes of light shine in a wide variety of colors around me. Even if they hit me, they don't hurt at all. Slowly, however, these also fade, and the fog finally seems to settle. So, on the ground it has disappeared, and I see a floor made of some sort of stone. The flowing noise of a huge river can be heard quietly in the background. For the first time I also raise my head upwards and I see a whole building complex, which has a totally different construction whiteness than the buildings in my regular world. You can literally feel the architectural masterwork. A lot of small gardens, made of the most beautiful flowers and statues, which emphasizes the whole ambience even more are covering the surrounding area. The beautiful view almost stuns me. I've probably just let myself down in a trance for a few minutes just by the sounds of the birds. The sun can't dazzle me either. Everything here is perfect and clean. No traces of war or destruction. This place here, that must be Aza.
Steps can be heard from my backside, but from whom? Is that Lye? He's certainly already waiting for me! I turn around and see a man wearing a gold armor. There is no trace of Lye... The person looks very young, despite this outfit. At the same time, he also looks like he is a very wise man. Should I address him? I can try it, but with such a rich-looking person I must pay close attention to my choice of words. For nobles it is very important to be very polite! This should not be a problem for an experienced warrior like me. However, it still causes discomfort in me. Before I can even speak a word, his first words so fall: "Greetings, first Genas!". He said this with a very hearty and relaxing voice. "You certainly have many questions about your existence and the reason for it, but first let yourself be told that you will be my first student ever! But before you can ask me questions let me guide you and tell me your name", he continues with a consistent tone. At the same time, he directs his head towards the pillars around here. The sunlight that shines on the structures fills the entire garden with a beautiful uniform white tone. Dark spots are thus illuminated and nowhere is a dark spot to be found here.
He asks me what my name is... I never had one. No one has ever given me one, but what can I say to this wise man? How should I respond to this question? I must come up with a name for myself quickly! "I see. You don't have one," he continues after a short moment of silence. Am I really that easy to see through? I thought I had acquired a poker face in the time when I worked briefly as a trader. But that doesn't matter now. "Yes!" I reply, "I haven't needed a name in my life, so I didn't think about it.". "I understand."
He replies with a heroic tone, so that even the birds flew out of the trees: "From now on, your name should be Ruh... Ruh the first Genas!" Again this name... Genas. What is that supposed to be? Is Genas the name or title for all warriors? Ruh. From now on I have a name. My parents had never given me one, and my followers always approached me as a commander. Probably because they didn't know for sure what my name was. But that never bothered me. No! It even made it easier for me. In this way, I could easily immerse myself without anyone ever having heard of me. It was also easier to find jobs because no one knew who I was. But what shall I think of the name Ruh? Somehow it sounds a bit weird to me. To get something I never had before, is confusing. Nevertheless, it gives me a bit of individuality. "A fighter without a heart and no name," that's what my opponents called me. However, I drift away from the peculiar question I should ask. I'm still concerned about where everyone else is. So far, I haven't seen any other person here. Neither an old comrade, nor other people like the man, that stands right in front of me. Is this place really Aza?" Now come along, Ruh the first Genas of Aza. There's a lot I want to show you", the gold-plated man says. Did I just hear "Aza"? Maybe I'm very close to my goal and it's just a stopover. It must be a kind of ceremony. Now I'm even a bit excited. What will happen next? It would be a bit interesting to experience something special before I retire in Aza.
The man, who is still unknown to me, leads me first around the garden, which I could already look at before. The garden is structured in different levels and has a round base area. The walls separating the individual parts of the gardens have beautiful detailed decorations. From carved stone surfaces to the most colorful mosaics, every kind of decoration is represented here. But what material is used here? I do not know. I have never seen a stone that can be polished so smoothly, but at the same time has such a beautifully uniform white color. As pure as this white may seems, it certainly has its dark sides too. The whole thing here gives me the same feeling as when I was with my old comrades. We all had a lucky charm on our armor, which was white. The color of purity. So, we proved that we weren't the bad guys on the battlefield. We were the ones who stood up for the people. We had to be very different from our enemies! Corruption and money have destroyed our whole world. My whole unit has been directed against the system of our world and has had to plug in a lot. All my friends who have fallen in this last battle may also be here and I hope they are waiting for my arrival.
"You're probably wondering what my name is. It may sound a little bit weird now, but I don't have a real name either. Gods generally don't have a real name here in Aza." He starts laughing quietly. But I am more concerned that he calls himself a God. That's impossible! If he was truly a god, he would look totally different!
Not like me or any other person. A God is the highest form of life! He is a impostor... for sure! But if that's the truth, that he really is a higher being I can't believe that he doesn't has a name either. He must have a name! After all, without having a name, no one can worship you. I give him a suspicious look.
He continues: "It is not exactly true, that I don't have a name. I am called God of Light by the others, but as my first Genas you are far too valuable to just address me in this way!" I immediately notice that he starts to stutter. Very atypical. A few minutes ago, he was totally calm, but his whole mood seems to have changed. More and more visibly forced words come out of him: "Just come up with a name for me! I think you are able to give me a name that is as good as yours." Now he goes to the edge of the fountain, which serves as the central point for the garden. Here all irrigation canals come together and here are the most amazing plants too.
He seems to be watching the waves of the water closely. A light wind blows away the flowers of the blossoming trees around me. Leaves rustle and the perfect lighting really makes you feel like you're in the afterlife. Without looking at me, he talks to me again, as he did at the very beginning, quiet and calmly. "And?". He disappeared from one moment to the next. "Do you have a name for me?", he suddenly whispers into my right ear. How could he come to me so fast? I was certainly so far from the fountain that not even the fastest horse would have reached me in less than two seconds. He is now patiently waiting for my answer while he stands behind me.
So how should I call him? I was never talented with giving names anyway. I never had one myself though. But when I look at the complete appearance, a name is coming into my mind. It has no special meaning. I don't even know how I did come up with this name, but the name is supposed to be Pah. I move my head right to my back, where Pah stands so I can look him directly in the eyes. I try to say it as monotonously as possible: „Your name shall be Pah."
He has an astonished expression on his face. It seems like he doesn't like it. He suddenly starts to put a smile on his face, and he speaks with a cheerful-sounding voice: "Then you shall call me Pah from now!".