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Chapter 14 - The Extraordinary Life

Chapter Fourteen: 1979 - 1982

An Unbelieveable Tour to SAC HQ

When you're with American Forces Radio at least back in the old days, (like everyone says) being you were one among approximately 550 people in Air Force personnel in this career field. The Navy , Army and even the Marines had personnel in what is known as AFRTS as well. It is important to note that while a particular service has it' personnel you work for an area commander and WITH commanders most often and especially at remote locations and there are plenty of those. The entire field is under the Department of Defense. Sometimes that can prove interesting. We'll leave it there, but use youre imagination.

It's a lot easier to get "known" or perhaps noticed when there are so few. Some excel for any number of reasons and I give you the perfect example of Sgt. Adrian Kronauer of

Good Morning Vietnam fame. Sometimes getting noted, can be a very good thing, and sometimes not, You'll will see as we move through the later years now of my 24 – years of service.

At any rate, from Incirlick Turkey, I received my orders for a three year accompanied tour to Strategic Air Command Headquarters, (SAC ) in Bellevue, Nebraska, just outside Omaha in the far eastern part of the state.

Reporting for duty, my job became the non-commissioned officer in charge of media relations department at SAC.. Sounds impressive doesn't it?

But, I should note that there were five officers that were over me and I worked for.

But being very good at radio and TV, (the deep voice that roared) really helped in carving out a rather unique position at SAC.

The officers handled mostly print inquiries and special projects which were nearly constant from somewhere in the world so all the broadcast inquiries were sent my way or to all of us as, then to me, as might be deemed necessary.

First thing was getting a Top Secret clearance. It was the lowest level one, but I got it. It was required to work there. As the tour there evolved I completely understood why.

Since the job was largely a day job from 8:00 AM to 5:00 PM most of the time I had evenings and weekends pretty much free. So, I got me a part time job in downtown Omaha, at radio station KOOO, a country music station.

That actually opened a lot of doors and opportunities one would never dream of that you'll hear about and I think you will enjoy, maybe envy a little as we go along. I know I would have. Things just fell into place, with very little prodding overall.

Let's get started.

The very first thing was a request I handled to meet and accompany Debbie Boone, singer,

(You Light Up My Life) and daughter of Pat Boone,the singer and movie star in the 50's and early 60's.

She came to take the tour of the underground command post for an unclassified briefing. Many of these briefings were given all the time, with business and political leaders, radio and television stations and other news organizations.

I probably did three or four dozen trips myself in the three years I was there.

After the first year was asked if I would update and re-record the unclassified briefing for all of these folks that visited the underground.

That alone to be honest was a very special honor and event in my life. There were all sorts of high profile people from all walks of life that visited our offices almost on a weekly basis. There probably still are.

Jimmy Carter was the Preident of the United States in 1979, We had one Air Force captain who lived in Bellvue. He was one of the Iran hostages held 444 days in the US Embassy takeover in Iran. Talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time. He told me after it was all over and we sat down for an interview, he had been in the Embassy about 20 minutes when it all happened. He didn't work there.

He had actually just arrived in Iran for a tour of duty.

The job as media relations NCO was always interesting, because every single morning when you arrived for work, was going to be a different day. You never really knew what to expect One very big day was this one.

I arrived for work on a fairly busy morning with many projects being worked by the officers in our section. We all took turns answering the phone and then pass it along as needed to the particular projecrt handler or the first person free to take the call. It's about 8:20 AM the phone rings and since I was free at that moment, I answer it.

A somewhat gravely but very understandable voice on the other end says, "I know that President Jimmy Carter is visiting SAC today." Since it was a releaseable fact I said, "yes sir he is but I am not sure of the exact time." (which by the way was always classified and we would never disclose if we knew it, which I did). So, how you answer the phone and what you can say sometimes always requires you think on your feet.

The fellow on the other end says, "It makes no difference, I am telling you he will not leave there alive."

Oh, just what I needed, a threat against the President of the United States and I've only been at work 20 minutes. I really needed this today.

I motion to both the major and the captain in my section of the office that this call needed to be traced. They saw my signal and started doing so.

My job now is obviously becomeso keeping this guy on the line as long as possible. I start thinking things like why me, why today, but when something like this happens, you can think all you want I suppose, but acting cleverly and steadily becomes critical.

I say to him "Excuse me sir, is there a problem or a reason you have for saying this. I mean I just got in today and this is pretty extreme don't you think". Long sentences, long questions, anything to keep him on the line becomes necessary.

After about 30 maybe 40 seconds more he says to me,

"I know what your doing, trying to trace this call, goodbye." The line went dead and that was that, well almost.

About four minutes later I have two FBI agents at my desk, I didn't even know there were any working there at the headquarters then. They started asking me a lot of questions. Did you recognize the voice? Can you describe the voice? From the voice can you determine how old he might have been? Did he sound or do you think he was intoxicated?

After another minute or two they said, "well good job sergeant we will let you know what we find out later."

So, I had done my job, quite well apparently that morning and the officers all mentioned it which made me feel very good. I am thinking what else can possibly happen today that is anything close to this? The answer was nothing.

About 4:00 PM that day though, wanting to follow-up and get some sort of closure to what had transpired first thing in the morning I called the number these FBI people had given me and asked.

What I heard was a bit of a relief, and a bit humorous but in a strange way I suppose. The agent says, "oh yeah, sorry, we didn't get back to you. This guy is a bit of an old nut that lives not very far off base, we've dealt with him before everything is OK." I had to wonder why none of us had ever been briefed about this guy. I mean we were the public information office.

I would have thought we should have this sort of public information certainly about people like this that might be "loose" in the area and probably in other ways as well, but we didn't.

All of us were a bit puzzled but nothing came of it so we let it go. Nevertheless, it did bother me that none of us in the office knew anything about this guy..

I did work with a BBC Television station on a story about the command and the "looking glass" the airplane that is always airborne. It was a pleasant experience and he sent a letter to my boss when they returned home saying so.

Ah! but with the good all to often comes the bad and then sometimes the ugly is not far behind either.

There was a group of TV news producers from French television who a month or so later wanted to do the same basic story almost. So my day started with an unclassified briefing in the underground command post followed by some filming around the base for background where the planes were kept. As we were driving, the lead producer askes me to stop the van right by the approach end of the active runway.

He says he wants to have the photographer lay down on the approach apron of the in use runway and film the plane as it flew over his head, (at an altitude perhaps of 20 feet) to land.

I told him no, saying that the distance between the photographer and touchdown on the active runway was maybe 35 yards and too dangerous for the photographer. It could also or could distract the pilot seeing him there and an accident could happen. Not only that the jet wash from the engines as it passed by would be very dangerous. He argued that he was willing to accept all the risk and the photographer was willing to do the same. I still said no.

Then he said "well if I cannot film where I choose, I will not film at all." I said fine with me, everybody in the van and we are out of here. He protested loudly to my boss and his boss. He got the same answer I had given him.

They left in a huff. I got a good job and a few other words about this TV crew. Then it was the German's turn to do a story. We headed down to the security checkpoint just before 3 PM in the afternoon.

As the security police were checking their ID's and credentials, all sorts of lights and alarms started sounding and the big concrete doors to the entry to the command post closed. We were all a bit bewildered because we knew this was no exercise. The reporters and film crew stayed around until we got an all clear, actually less than an hour later. One thing it proved to me and I think to them as well. Whatever it was, NORAD in Cheyanne mountain and SAC were clearly on the same page in an instant.

It turned out that the computers in Colorado detected an apparent missile launch from somewhere in thr Soviet Union apparently. B-52's were in the air in minutes from other bases. The entire thing was cleared up in less than an hour and things returned to normal about an hour after that. Once everything was checked and rechecked the crew departed but they already had a pretty good start to an extra story. The culprit turned out to be a 46 cent part in a computer that malfunctioned and started it allt.

The Germans not only got their story the next day but the real deal as an add on at no charge. It ended well, that of course was the most important part.

It had for me certainly been an eye opening tour to say the least and I was only about one third into the three - year experience. Ucky me sort of .

Then, my phone rings at home about 3 AM one morning.

I am thinking a no notice exercise like we'd go through at some other bases, but we didn't do any of those, If anything we'd create them for our bases, so again the first thought one has is "what now?"

The what now was a fire in a minuteman missile silo in Missouri. It was my captain saying to pack a light bag, come to the office for a briefing and we were going to the scene.

I had the small suitcase packed, the phone rang again as I was headed out the door to the car. It was the captain again saying change of plans, we weren't going to Missouri after all, at least not he and I.

I don't know if I was relieved or disappointed to be honest. Apparently a repairman who was working on a scaffold in the silo dropped a wrench which punctured the skin of the missle and fuel started leaking. On e spark was all that was needed to start a fire and they got one. Everyone was evacuated eventually to include one airman that was trapped in one area.

His work partner was hailed as a hero in what was and turned out to be an "un-authorized" rescue attempt, which was successful. Then about a week late, was disciplined for disobeying a direct order from the commander on scene to NOT make the attempt to save the mans life. That story made it to 60 minutes on the CBS Network. That made the workload in our office a little busier.

Another brief mention of yet another incident we had to deal with. A lieutenant was caught on camera making trips to a Russian counsulate which activated the hornets nest yet again.

He retained the attorney F. Lee Bailey as his lawyer and that caused more questions than answers. I knew about it but this whole business was handled by the front office, mainly the full Colonel in charge. Things returned to normal, well almost normal.

Out in the sparsely populated areas of Colorado especially in the south, we have military aircraft training and testing areas. Fighter pilots engage in training on these courses frequently. Well, as Murphy's Law states,"if something can go wrong, it will." We had one of our fighter aircraft out there on the range practicing low level bombing runs, no weapons, just testing out everything the aircraft can do in various scenarios.

One such feature of the plane was what they call "terrain following radar." This was a great tool for any plane to have, but every plane is slightly different one would guess as to how the system actually works on that plane. Pilots practice simply to get completely trained and accustomed to a specific model of plane they might fly.

One morning we got the word that one of the fighters had crashed out there on the range. Naturally, everyone from rescue to safety people and manufactures are on the way to the scene to try and determine the cause.

It became known that the plane was making low level runs out there on the practice area in addition to all other sorts of things. One of the scenarios was the use of the terrain following radar.

As it turned out, I got the story to handle with help if I needed it. One newspaper out in Colorado called me and asked about terrain following radar, which I tried to explain to him.

The reporter apparently decided to add two and two and get five. There wasn't much left of the airplane but he asked if the pilot was using the special radar and that could have caused the crash if it had failed.

I told him anything was possible but I was not there and we'd see what the investigation currently on going would reveal.

The very next morning I read the story in the paper

"SAC spokesman says plane was using terrain following radar when it crashed."

It's times like those when at least in the moment you'd like to strangle a reporter trying to make a sensational story with nearly nothing to go on. Of course I was interviewed by the higher ups in the office and was asked. I explained exactly what I had said and they replied, "Well welcome to our secret society of MISQUOTED airmen.

That brings me to another part of the daily, ongoing things we have to deal with somnetimes. This involves letters of complaint from people who are anything from annoyed to claims of all sorts of personal injury or damage suffered when they hear a sonic boom an aircraft might make. The book of letters was quite thick. I must tell you that any day you feel you need comic relief, you pick up the book and read some of the letters. Our office monitored and kept records of all these complaints. The appropriate office takes all claims to investigation no matter how strange they might sound. We also check out everything such as was their even an airplane in or near the complaint area (in the case of a sonic boom for example) if and who might have been flying what in that area with the area control towers and radar stations. Most every complaint is taken seriously.

I have to give you these two stories because as I mentioned sometimes these letters will bring tears to your eyes in disbelief and laughter.

The first was a fellow who claimed he was taking a shower in his bathtub at 2:30 AM in the morning when a plane sonic boomed right over his house. Right off, I knew that this is simply not allowed. As a result his letter stated that he fell and hit his head on the ceramic tub and had to see a doctor for the head injury. That plus the next day upon examining a part of the house near the bathroom saw where the wood and cement looked like it was crumbling. Yes, we investigated, no award was made because the doctor he saw had apparently moved away and he'd already fixed the house by the time the inspectors arrived, (like in less than just over a day), jHe sent us a bill, we sent him a complete assessment but no check. He didn't argue.

The next one was equally strange and a bit unbelieveable as well. This time the letter came from a farmer, whose farm was out near the test range, but not on the designated flying routes. He was raising pretty much everything but had like about 1,500 chickens among everything else. His letter claimed that two Air Force pilots in two F-4 high performance jets, had approached his farm at high speed.

He said that when they got to his property, "nearly touching the ground" and lit the aircraft's afterburner and proceeded to make a steep climb.

His claim was thet over 500 of the chickens suffered heart attacks due to the incident and died.

That was investigated as well. Believe it or not turned out to be true, a good claim. Unbelieveable!! But as base operations on any base always does, they know who is flying, where, the aircraft type and tail number and of course, who the pilots are. Needless to say these young jet jockeys were, should we say "interviewed," read the riot act and disciplined appropriately. The Air Force paid the farmers claim and while I never knew, I wonder if the pilots were made to pay the Air Force for the chickens. Just a guess that their fate was considerably worse.

I was still working part time at this radio station and I got to meet the son of a big booking agency in Omaha.

That proved very fruitful as we became friendly enough so that when he booked the country musical acts for the Nebraska State fair in the capital of Lincoln, I got backstage passes, free admission to he fair, the shows and to go back stage to meet all the entertainers and ask them to do promotional statements for my show. I got to meet all of the country music artists performing that week.

Among them were

Kenny Rogers, Dottie West, Lacy J. Dalton,

Merle Haggard, Crystal Gale and others. I was quite pleased with all the results that we got with the promotions and even a few interviews. One in particular stood out. That was Crystal Gayle. She was there with her husband Bob.

When you were going to interview her, it was going to be a one on one in a small private room. He however wanted to review all the questions and the promotional statements before hand.

That was understandable, as there were two country music stations in Omaha, a lot of them within "ear shot" of Omaha and as a lawyer which he was, was extremely careful not to use words like, "I only listen to" "exclusively" and that sort of thing so as not to offend anyone. To this day I remember that 20 minutes I spent with her.

It was not over by a longshot though as the station actually co-sponsored a live show in Omaha. On the program was Johnny Lee, (Lookin for Love) Mickey Gilley and their bands. There were to be two performances that evening. A fellow named Randy who was also at the station got to MC or basically introduced the first show and I got the nod for the second one. At any rate, in the break after the first show, I met Johnny Lee who was the opening act.

As we always did, I asked if he had any preferences as to his introduction and all he would say was "I'm sure you'll handle it well." So I asked what side of the stage he would enter from and he said right side which made sense as that was the entrance to the stairs where the dressing rooms were. So the show started, I got up and introduced him, pointed to the right side of the stage and he came out on the left side.

As he passed me he grinned and said "gottcha." After his performance I was backstage talking to him when he said that we'd go have some beers downstairs where the dressing rooms were. I said OK, sure.

The second show ends, the audience is leaving I head up on the stage and Johnny and I start back to the stairs that will take us to the dressing rooms. All of a sudden Johnny and I hear a " Hi Johnny Lee how are you." It's a tall, beautiful blond, whom I knew was not any part of the show we just finished. So, how she was ever even backstage was a mystery. What we both notice is that, well, lets say she is riding about 32,000 feet and still climbing.

She says, "I am ready to party if you are, what are you doing now?" Johnny took one look and said, "well, me and my friend here pointing to me are about to go and have a few beers" and he walks off. I am about 10 steps behind him at this point.

As I pass her I hear something I never have forgotten to this day. She says "hi" (there is a very short pause and then, )"are you anybody?".

I just, grimaced, kind of an "ouch" I guess, I didn't say a word and headed downstairs. We never saw her again.

I also got a chance to do an introduction and meet the famous Oak Ridge Boys. Joe Bonsall, lead singer, Duane Allen, Bill Golden, with the long white hair and beard, and Richard Sterban with the most incredibhle bass voice you can imagine.

All were so very real and polite although Joe was always ready able and did say whatever came to mind, whenever.

The station also received an offer of another show through this agency I had made friends with.

Seems these two acts were on the road, traveling together through the midwest and they were setting up tour dates and stops. The station was in fairly serious financial straights at the time and after talking with the station manager and trying my best to get him to say yes and commit he finally had to say no that he could not afford to take the chance.

As it turned out, the lead singer was Lacy J. Dalton and her band, the Dalton Gang. The opening act, we had never heard of or about at the time. However, they were forecast by just about everybody in the business to be huge in short order. As it turned out, the pundits were right.

The group was called ALABAMA. The total fee for the show, two one hour performances was $11,000 dollars. Some things you never forget and honestly always regret.

When I was in the final year or so of this tour, I was given another project by my supervisors at the time. The request came from an Air Force laison office in of all places Hollywood, well OK, Los Angeles California.

The project was to get a film group, crew and their equipment to Thule AB in northwest Greenland near the top of the ice sheet. They had two aircraft, crew and all the camera gear, sound equipment, lights and all to get there,

My job was to get them fuel for the aircraft as they headed to the top of the world. I learned in short order that the director of the film was Clint Eastwood and the movie they wanted to film scenes up there for was called FIREFOX

We actually came to an agreement by getting the craft refueled in Maine and again at Gander, Newfoundland and fuel while in Thule to start the trip back. They also had asked for some charts from the meteorological center that would be used in the movie like a GPS. I managed to get the film manager, Fritz Maines to agree that Mr. Eastwood would spend awhile at the local NCO Club visiting with the folks assigned there. It all worked out like a charm.

What I didn't know at the time was that I would get a chance to visit this base myself, just for a couple of hours.

I could not imagine a tour there to be honest. Mot a bad place but at he time, I was stationed in Iceland and the day we left Iceland iIt was a balmy 52 detgrees. When we arrived at Thule, it was plus nine. I just knew the being stationed there for a one- year tour was simply not in any of my long range plans. It was one of those things that if you're tapped, nominated or "chosen" you go of course and you deal with it, but if not, you sigh with great relief and breathe easier again.

There were other events never to be forgotten as well. I mean here I was in anothder tour and a prestigious major command headquarters. It was a new and fascinating experience, minor or major, many one of a kind events continuously almost

One was the annual AKSARBEN celebrations. Aksarben is Nebraska spelled backwartds. It featured everything from a carnival like atmosphere to horse racing and shows during the day to celebrity shows and performances each evening. Once again, I got to go backstage and meet the performers after the shows. One was Glen Campbell. That interview got off to a bit of a rocky start.

My then wife and I were backstage, he came to the area and I gave him the promos I wanted him to read. He said, "I forgot my reading glasses" and looking at my wife said "let me borrow yours." He put them on and laughingly said "Oh my God sweetheart get a dog. "

He did the promos was nice enough to sit around a few minutes and talk and as he was leaving said "I hope you didn't take me seriously Carolyn, it was a joke". She agreed, I think !!

Two nights later, once again backstage after a great show by Liberace was there. He was a true gentleman, not anything like the onstage performer. We did a lot of talking and he read for me as well.

We all knew for years what an incredibly talented performer he was and as flamboyant as they come.

Perhaps three of the most memorable moments in my assignment to Strategic Air Command Headquarters were working a small part overall, escorting the crews of the television documentarty "30 Minutes to Live" as a good amount of the filming was done at SAC on Looking Glass aircraft in the command post underground all of course in an unclassified setting. Real SAC military personnel participated.

As the scenes were being filmed I got the feeling that this would be an eye-opening look at a potential attack on the United States, I mean it was something you could just feel. When I saw the completed television production, I realized that I was right and actually could pick out four or five scenes where I was actually there at the side of the producers.

I guess numbers one and two on the list were totally different but equally impressive on a technical sergeant.

For any number of reasons, I guess, I always managed to find myself in the middle of so many great moments in my military service and before that in history. Both of the points of contact had the first name of Lorne.

I was asked to assist as the announcer in a dramatic reading by the commander of the Strategic Air Command band,

Lt. Col (then) Lorne Johnson wrote a script, the music and then directed the entire performance at the Officers Club on Offutt Air Force Base.

I think we practiced like forever but Col. Johnson wanted this to be perfection. As it turned out, it was and I finally found ouy why. I will never ever forget the actual performance, the comments and letters of appreciation that followed.

After our performance I went with my Public Affairs colonel to a room to meet some of the people that had just witnessed this event.

I'm honestly not sure who, but the word was that some of the VIP's in attendance that evening wanted to say thank you for what they had just seen and heard. Talk about stunned.

There were more stars in that room than a night sky and a number of civilians. The ones I can actually remember were the four star commanders of other commands and of course their aides. At the very top of the list however was the real, Jimmy Doolittle, and next to him, Alexander Haig the former Secretary of State under Ronald Reagan.

Truth is those moments were mind numbing and breathtaking.

Then there was one last event that I shall never forget either. That was a poem I wrote and the day Lorne Greene came to Omaha for an entirely different reason.

Not being shy, I don't think ever, I thought to myself, wouldn't it be great to have Lorne Greene with his deep incredible voice read this poem and from that I could make a film clip for all time. So I called around, eventually found the right person and was invited to a cocktail event that evening that Mr. Greene would be attending.

I was introduced to him, told him about my poem and I asked him if he would do me the honor of reading it. He didn't hesitate for a second and then, another surprise.

He said the room was to noisy, why didn't he come to my studio in the headquarters the next morning and do it then. You can imagine what that meant. He showed up right at 10 AM and recorded it beautifully and then was gone. When I played it back a few minutes later, I found that there were portions that were garbeled due to twisted in one part and lack of any recording material on this one reel. I was devastated. I called the manager and told him what had happened.

About an hour later at my office, the phone rang and it was none other than Lorne Greene. He said he had heard about the problem but was leaving for wherever the next morning. Then he said, tell you what, meet me at the airport we'll find a room and I'll do it then. Can you be there about 8:30 AM? I could have been there at 3 AM if it were necessary. I met him the next day at the airport, we recorded it twice actually and then I walked with him to the gate. There is a short film clip somewhere in the audio visual archives today with my poem and his narration.

This as it turned out and you just read was an incredible three - year tour. From here we head to Texas.

Another one - year tour before heading to a finishing school of sorts then to another remote tour of duty.