"Is it my face that turned you down?
Is it my face that you didn't like?
Is it my face that's not cute enough?
Is it my face that didn't deserve to be loved?
If it is my face, then i will change it
Not for you but for myself
If you think I'm ugly, then you are uglier
For inside you there's a rotten soul
For my looks i will start to care
This face has brought me shame
Maybe i can fix this and be more attractive
Then i will never know you when that time came
If it is my face that is the problem
There are many products that can be solution
But even a moisturizer or whitening soap
Can never fix your charcoal soul"
I will never fall in love again, a promise that i made myself, at least until i already have an attractive face that girls will like. On these days, most of the girls are looking for pretty face, cool personality, and of course, money. I promised myself that i will work hard until i achieve all of that, but for now i will continue to study my lectures at school while making my face look better. Oh!! I already started telling you stories but I haven't introduce myself yet.
I am Luke, 15 years old and not that good-looking, my height is just on average, i have dark skin, black hair, brown eyes, and a lot of pimples in my face, some people find me as a disgusting person, I don't know why maybe because of my pimples, they are overlapping on my face, i literally looks like a walking pimple with face on it, but even though i have disgusting face, i have good personality, i am always smiling in every situation, i am very positive, and i sure have pure and good heart.
So lets go back to the story. I entered the school gate, all eyes are on me, some people are laughing, while some people are feeling sad for what happen to me. Because i am still feeling embarrassed, i ran towards my classroom, i run fast without looking back, suddenly, a girl appeared in front of me, i bumped into her and i fall into the ground...
"Sorry i wasn't loo....."
the words that i can hear from other people, defending myself can make my situation even worst. I just cried silently, anyone can see, but they will never hear it, they don't have to, because I don't want them to, because if i cry loudly, i know that they will make more fun of me and laugh at me louder.
The class has started, i wiped my tears and tried to analyze the lectures that my teacher is giving. But the things that are making me cry are still in my head, I can't take it out of my mind, I can't break free from her words, i am continuing to be a prisoner of the pain that i feel. Without understanding the lectures the class has ended, it is break time and i am too embarrassed to show my face on school canteen. Once again i find myself sitting on the grassfield, sad and hungry. Luckily i still have a friend that can stand my disgusting face, it's ricky, he is my childhood friend and my classmate since 5th grade, he is the compleate opposite version of me, he's tall, has lighter skin color, athletic body build, smooth face, he is very handsome. He dont need to court girls because they are the one that's courting him.
"Here, have some chips and water, i know you're hungry"
he then gave me a pack of barbecue flavored chips and a bottle of water
"I heared what just happened. I bought the water for you, and i found that chips on my locker. Here, take my locker key, i know that you are too embarrassed to show your face on other students in canteen. I have a lot of chips in my locker, i also have lots of coockies and biscuits, I don't know how those girls opened my locker room to put those foods, take as much as you want"
He then gave me the key and replied "thanks"
Then i changed our conversation topic...
"Dude, by the way... Where were you? I needed someone to talk to a while ago but you weren't in our class" i asked him with sadness
"I don't want to attend on that subject, so i spent my time on basketball court a while ago" he replied
"You know, sometimes I felt jealous of you, you don't need to attend the class because our teacher will pass you anyway, you have a lot of girls out there that are waiting to be fucked by you, literally, and you dont have any pimples" i don't know why i said that but it just came out of my mouth
He then jokingly replied
"You know dude, that's the advantage of being handsome... haha, just kidding"
Then i asked again...
"One last question, When are you gonna tell them that you are gay and you just joined the basketball team to see sweaty hot guys on the court?" His eyes gone big and swiftly covered my mouth...
He then replied softly with worries
"Dude someone might hear you, shhhh that's our secret, you know that i am hiding that secret since 5th grade"
"Sorry dude our secret is safe.. hahaha"
We continued our different conversations while sitting on the grassfield, i am always thankful that i have that green grassfield to comfort me everytime, but for me, that grassfield is not colored green, it is purple for me, because of al the negativity that i brought there it's color has changed in my eyes, as the white turns black, the green turned purple.