"Yakety sax."
".....But why though?"
"Well everything is better with Benny Hill theme music, observe."
With that Kyle turned towards the tree line where the music seemed to be emanating from. The random who asked the question also looked in that direction and as if given a signal from some higher power the rest of the Powell army looked in the same direction.
This seemed to draw the attention of the enemy as they also directed their vision towards the tree line feeling something special was about to happen.
"What's going on?"
Asked Mr Squarepants with some confusion. The change in tone was somehow unnerving to him and the emo and slut were also slightly nonplussed by this as to them this was their moment of victory, but things kept happening out of their expectation.
Finally figures broke the tree line scrambling and clawing their way ahead pushing each other back with looks of absolute terror on their faces. These figures were a small group of the civilian militia who broke when the illusions were released.
"What are they running from?"
"They run as if the very whips of their masters were behind them."
"Man something has got them good."
These were a few of the comments both armies were saying to this view. As the militia men scrambled up and continued sprinting directly between the two armies apparently oblivious to everything other than the route in front of them.
Suddenly from the tree line the source of their fear emerged and it was none other than the misshapen clown still waving his giant sausage above his head while riding on the clown car screaming at the men in front of him.
"Don't run we won't hurt you just let me love you. Do you want to see some puppies I've also got some candy? Come on don't you want to sit in Mr Clowns lap, you are pretty red headed little boy.....HAHAHAHA. I'm coming for you sweetie!! OH HI BOSS!"
It looked like Kyle had given to much personality and license to this particular illusion but as the clown car drove between them with the clown leader now spanking himself with the sausage as they drove through wolves were the next to follow.
No one was sure whether these were illusions or real but as a man was seen chasing after them Kyle identified them as illusions.
"FENTON GET BACK HERE BAD BOY OH JESUS!"
Was the cry as this new crowd followed the militia and clowns giving a salute in Landon and Kyle's directions as they passed to which Kyle could only face palm and Landon just looked like someone had hit him in the face with a kipper before looking at Kyle with a questioning glance.
Before they could get their heads in the game more wolves burst out but these had Maurice's men on them in particular was the short sergeant who Kyle thought sounded Irish came belting through and Kyle distinctly heard the sergeant shout.
"Keep up bitches we got some boys to catch."
Everything paused for a second when finally a strange single zombie appeared from the underbrush wearing a crisp white suit with a white fedora and moving in a strange way.
"Who knew zombies move faster when they moonwalk?"
Kyle said more to himself than anyone else, as this weird procession finally passed into the other side of the valley and out of sight with a final zombie roar which sounded strangely like someone saying "He he."
Kyle looked around as everyone from both sides, seemed to shake themselves from some kind of stupor as when the parade of strange went past no one even thought of interrupting them and just watched turning their heads in unison as they passed.
"Well you don't see that every day."
Someone on Kyle's side said with a blank face and monotone voice. This opened the flood gates and everyone began laughing much to the chagrin of the enemy side.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING ATTACK THEM!! I WANT THEIR HEADS!!"
The slut was once again having a breakdown and more than one person thought that she should maybe invest in some weed, get laid and chill the f*ck out. This was neither here nor there as the emo boy had recovered enough that he gave a signal to some of the people around him who were also wearing dark cloaks like it was some kind of geek convention.
These people ripped of the cloaks to reveal the deformed and horrid forms concealed underneath. These people were horrendously mutated by the cult's teachings and practices but while some may be horrified by this, most of the people on Kyle's side had experience wiping out the cult or had seen examples to prepare them for situations like this.
Mr Squarepants also signalled his guards when the cult revealed themselves and he along with his elites began to push forward.
"Okay lads they are going all out, so the gloves are off. WALL FORMATION TWO DEEP WITH FULL POWER GO!"
Landon saw that the enemy was fully committed so now was the time to go full throttle. Now everyone would unleash their magic without worry or constraint.
The army spaced themselves out with enough space around them so they can move freely and won't interfere with each other.
Kyle and crew were located centre right in the front row ready to engage, while Landon and Harris were on the left and right wing second row respectively so the army had full command coverage.
"LET'S HAVE EM."
Was the war cry Landon came up with as the army surged forward in ordered lines to engage across the wide front simultaneously and limiting the chance of being flanked by using pure speed.
By contrast the enemy force also moved forward but it wasn't ordered or at a steady pace like the Powell's force was. Instead their lines broke up with the faster members out pacing their compatriots and some even holding back letting others take the lead.
The beasts of the cult began to get ahead of everyone else and were the first to engage the front line. Just before they made contact those in front unleashed their magic in the forms of blasts in the case of fire, spikes in the case of ice and earth and fine blades in the case of wind.
When the magic made contact it turned into a scene from a world war two movie with body parts and ass flying everywhere. It was too late for those behind and they could only continue through the blood and viscera straight into the loving embrace of death.
When the armies came into contact the Powell army switched from using ranged magic and instead coated their weapons with their chosen magic boosting the power and lethality. It took a moment before people realised what was happening.
"They're all mages! How??"
"Pull back retreat we need to make ranks."
"Push forward engage them in close."
"We can't go further they're too strong."
Various contradicting orders were shouted by those in charge, adding to the chaos and fear. Landon and his guard had managed to push through the lines and was rapidly approaching Mr Squarepants.
From above a few condors began diving down with the girls of steel lotus on board who were harassing the lines with a few heading to emo boy and the slut in order to prevent them escaping.
Landon was close to Mr Squarepants at this point and was ready to engage.
"Hey buddy ready to dance?"