"You might not know this, but I'm also very afraid of places, such as the seaside, " Feng Jing said.
Du Anran looked at him again. Seaside So, when he said that he wanted to find a place, he actually went to a place deep in his heart that he was unwilling to accept?
"If you have the courage to come over, it means that it's no longer a place that you're afraid of. Just as you said, avoiding is the stupidest way. "
"Yes, I don't want to avoid it anymore, " Feng Jing said. "So, I came over. "
"then you can try to open your heart. I can be the best listener. "
Before Ouyang Pei left, she had never been able to find out what was on Feng Jing's mind. But now, she hoped that it was not too late. At least she thought that it was better to have someone to share the burden with than to carry it silently alone.
"Anran, have you ever liked someone to the point that you think you will never forget them? " Feng Jing asked faintly.
His voice was like the sea, salty and mixed with an indescribable silence.
Du Anran was stunned. No one had asked her this question for a long time.
She nodded. "Yes... because love is always engraved in my heart and bones. "
"Yes, the words 'engraved in my heart and bones' are like sharp swords, forcing people to be breathless. " Feng Jing's voice was even depressed.
"I always thought that time is the omnipotent formula to solve any problem. In the end, I found that there are some things that can not be solved and can not be dissolved. " Du Anran's heart was also filled with bitterness.
Just like how she could not forget Xin Zimo no matter how much she tried to escape. It was because he was engraved in her heart.
"since there is no solution, sometimes I will think, would it be better to give up... " Feng Jing said.
"whether it's giving up or choosing to persevere, as long as you think it's right or most people think it's right, then choose which one, " Du Anran said.
"Anran, are you willing to listen to me tell a story... " Feng Jing looked into the distance.
Du Anran nodded. "Of course I'm willing... "
She and Feng Jing sat side by side. At the end of their line of sight was the distant horizon. The water and the sky connected, as if the other end was connected to a world that no one knew about.
"there was once a large courtyard where two children of the same grade lived. There was a girl and a boy. Just like the beginning of all love stories, this story was also out of fashion. The boy fell in love with this girl. At the age of Childhood Sweethearts, at the age of being ignorant of love."
Probably because he had smoked a lot, Feng Jing's voice was hoarse. But when Du Anran heard it, she felt like she was choking.
The moment he opened his mouth, she knew that this boy was him.
"after spending so many years together, this boy naturally thought that the girl must also like him. "This boy never confessed until the year he graduated from high school. The boy said that we should apply to the same university. "In the end, the girl told him that she wanted to go abroad. "The boy tried to persuade her many times, but the girl remained unmoved. "So they quarreled, and it was very fierce. "
Du Anran listened quietly and did not interrupt Feng Jing's words.
"early the next morning, the boy just woke up and heard that the girl took a plane to London at night. "
Du Anran was stunned. Would all girls be unusually thorough when they hardened their hearts.
"The boy was also very angry. He felt that he had been overestimating himself for so many years. So, he applied to a local university. Just like that, he did not see the girl again after four years of university. The number of times the girl returned to the country could be counted on one hand. Later, his family simply moved abroad."
"that boy has not seen her again until now? " Du Anran asked.
If the answer was "yes, " she would feel that this girl was indeed ruthless.
If it was her, would she be able to do it Unless there was an explanation, she had never loved this boy at all... ...
Otherwise, if she had loved him, how could it be so easy to leave no traces. Some things were like those carved on stone tablets. The wind could not blow them away, and the rain could not scatter them.
How many people could really be so free and decisive... ...
"Yes... ... You probably already know that this boy is me .. And this girl, her name is Shen Zhan. When I was young, she always told me that her name came from 'wet clothes, wet apricot rain, cold face, willow wind' . She was born in the season when apricot flowers fell. Many times, I almost forgot her appearance, but from time to time, I would wake up in a dream. I would dream of her, dream of her smiling. I was afraid to mention her name to others, and it seemed that the moment it was mentioned, my entire person seemed to be empty... ... ..."
Du Anran didn't expect that Feng Jing had such a past buried in his heart, and she couldn't help but sigh endlessly.
The rain of apricot flowers was wet, and the wind of willows blew on his face. Shen Zhan was probably just like her name. She was a very beautiful girl, as if she had walked out from the south of the Yangtze River... ...
But, the more beautiful a girl was, the more ruthless she was?
"Why has she not seen you for so many years? " Du Anran asked.
Even if they were friends or neighbors, they would not be able to make such a decision!
"because she went to another world and left me forever... " when Feng Jing said this, a tear finally fell from his eyes.
The wind blew, and tears flowed down his cheeks. If the tears melted into the sea, could it bring his yearning to heaven... ...
Du Anran was surprised. So... ...
She would rather this girl named Shen Zhan Ignore Feng Jing. At least that way, she could still live her own life, happy and carefree.
"Do you miss her very much... " Du Anran asked softly.
"Yes, I miss her even in my dreams. She still owes me an explanation. Has she ever loved me... " Feng Jing said "But many times, I know that I'm not worthy to ask her this question. If I hadn't quarreled with her, if I had gone abroad with her, perhaps everything that happened afterward wouldn't have happened. "
"It's not your fault. If everyone knew their fate in the future, then there would be no meaning in living, " Du Anran said.
"I understand this logic, but I've been unable to convince myself. So later, I threw myself into my studies, into starting a business, forcing myself to be tired and bitter, just so that I wouldn't have the time to miss her. "
Du Anran's heart trembled. It turned out that people were similar to each other. When they couldn't find a good solution, they would always choose to escape. This was an inherent factor.
"But you should know that she will never come back... " Du Anran said.
"I know that she will never come back. She has already left with the sea. But tell me, how many years does it take to forget a person? Why can't I forget after trying to forget for so many years... " Feng Jing's voice was filled with sorrow.
How many years does it take Du Anran had never tried... ...
She even told Xin Zimo today that if he tried to forget her, three to five years would be enough. But now, Feng Jing told her that three to five years was not enough to forget a person.
She used to think that a man's heart was not delicate enough and that the so-called "love" was only verbal. It was not until she met Xin Zimo and Feng Jing that she understood that men could sometimes be more infatuated than women.
"then have you ever thought of trying to accept a new relationship? " Du Anran asked.
"My heart for Shen Zhan hasn't turned to ashes yet. I think it's unfair to another woman to start a new relationship. "
Du Anran looked at his side profile, and her firm lines showed some tenderness.
"since you came to the seaside today, it means that you're willing to say goodbye to the past. "Then, you might as well give it a try. After completely letting go of the past, welcome life in a new state. "Try to accept different people, and try to stop and look around. "
Du Anran was trying to persuade Feng Jing. In fact, she knew that it was easy to persuade others, but it was very difficult to actually do it.
For example, if she were to let go of Xin Zimo and accept another man, would she be able to do it?
She could only love one person in her life. Many times, her heart was too small and she could not let go of too much... ...
"In the past, I would reject everything related to the sea because did you know Last spring, Shen Zhan was swallowed by the sea waves in order to save people. Her family searched for her for three days and three nights, but they could not find her. "At that time, I was still in the country throwing a tantrum because she ignored me. "I never thought that I would be separated from her forever. "
Feng Jing's words once again shocked Du Anran. What kind of woman was Shen Zhan? She could save people without caring about her own safety.
"But today, I suddenly understood. If I'm afraid to come into contact with everything related to Shen Zhan all my life, then I won't be able to face myself in my life. "My conscience has never been clear, so I came to the seaside today because I wanted her to hear what I said... ... ..
"If she could hear what you said, she would definitely forgive you. You didn't do anything wrong, you just didn't know, " Du Anran said.
"I hope that she can hear what I said in heaven. " Feng Jing raised his head slightly.
The Sky was blue, and it was the same color as the sea. The seagulls were flying in the sky, and a faint fragrance floated around.
"Isn't it much easier to say it out loud? " Du Anran looked at him.
Feng Jing nodded. "This matter has always been a knot in my heart. I have liked her for so many years, and we were childhood sweethearts. "In the past, it was resentment. But last spring, it became my self-blame and regret. "although this knot hasn't been completely untied, at least it's loosened a lot. It's no longer like a shackle that binds me. "
"So, in the future, if you have any sad things to say in time, don't keep them buried in your heart, " Du Anran said.
"I've been unhappy all these years. I miss her very much, but I'm angry in my heart, and I don't want to take the initiative to go abroad to find her. In the end, when it's really too late, I only know regret. "
"She didn't look for you all those years. You two are really awkward... " Du Anran sighed softly.
In fact, she thought of herself and Xin Zimo. In the past, when the two of them were unwilling to lower their heads, they were almost at daggers drawn.
"maybe it's because she never liked me. It's always been my wishful thinking. " Feng Jing sighed. "otherwise, she wouldn't have gone missing for so many years. But it doesn't mean much now... "