Lunes, Setyembre 25, 2018 (3:03 PM)

"We are slaves driven by ambitions drilled on to us at an early age where we expect too much and cared too less of the reality ahead. The daily household wake up with a mountain of overdue bills for the future of children unaware that the cycle will go on and on like a mechanical wheel with them serving as replacement nuts and bolts. The children of men are molded to perform eight to twelve hours of work, dreading the deduction in their minimum wage, performing tasks until they're robotic enough to compete for a higher position. While we drown in an ocean of responsibilities and longed six-digit payslips to make ends meet, the rich will climb our shoulders for a breath of fresh air knowing that we cannot speak when our heads are underwater, our cries for help forever flown away by the ebb of crony capitalism. Despite the writings on the wall, we elect clowns, and complain when the circus gets too loud, and turn a blind-eye when the clowns get guns for hands. It's almost like a cycle of bad decisions, a mistake disguised as a heirloom, a genetic stubbornness. Now may I ask you, is the Filipino people still worth dying for?"

(The Filipino people is worth dying for - quote from Ninoy Aquino, one of our national heroes)

"Wow." Adriana muttered, looking at her boyfriend as he peeked behind his notebook.

"Was it good?" Hans asked. "Or was it depressing?"

"Too depressing."

"Well, that's good! Gives your mind something to ponder about." Hans said, glad of her approval. "So, how are your classes?"

"Eh." She shrugged. "Not much can be said when there are just seven of you in the whole class, and Mary's the only one who'd spoken to me and she's often absent.

"Spoken to you, so you mean you didn't initiate a single conversation by yourself?"

"Hans…" She said, her tone changing. "… I don't know but, I'm really having a hard time meeting new people. They're like all rich kids from QC and I feel so… different."

(QC - Quezon City, the largest city in the National Capital Region)

"I'm pretty sure everyone wants to be friends with you." He said confidently. "You're the prettiest, funniest, smartest, and loveliest girl, Ms. Adriana Villar. So beautiful, that you went from friend to girlfriend."

She tried to hide her blush. "Oh God, and you Mr. Hans Alcantara. You're probably the corniest guy in the whole campus, yet here you are."

They laughed heartedly together, enjoying the wind blew at the open field as they talked about their day. All around, students were either strolling for relaxation or running for their lives (mostly freshmen) to their designated college building. From a distance, she could see a group of familiar and unfriendly faces approaching, each with their own set of glaring eyes at them as if they were a pack of wolves and they the sheep.

Amanda with a sly braced grin.

Nicole trying to look oblivious but her expression speaks it all.

Clara with her eyes rolling from Batanes to Jolo.

(Batanes is the northernmost province in the Philippines while Jolo is the southernmost. A funny expression that I've read in Twitter)

And lastly, Evelyn with a smirk that spells resentment.

"Adriana?" Hans said, wondering why she's fixated on somewhere. "Babe? Are you okay?"

Realizing where his girlfriend was staring at, Hans began packing their bags as they walked away. They could hear the girls laugh but seeing them was enough to make Adriana uncomfortable.

"Hey, so how about you invite Mary when we go to the movies later? I'll take Brendan if she doesn't want to be third-wheeling." He suggested. "And hey, maybe Brendan will like her."

"No, she went home early." She replied. "She literally vomited during recitation. I think she's sick."

They walked to the parking lot, seeing Hans' bright red Inova nearby.

"Also, she's thirty-two. I don't think Brendan's in to older women." She added.

"Well, beggars can't be choosers. He needs to get out of that vlogging shit and get laid or something." He reasoned as he leaned on his car's door. "Where's that idiot anyway?"

Hans suddenly shrieked when he heard loud knocks from inside his car. She laughed a little, knowing how easily he gets frightened. The windows opened, and Brendan peeked wearing sunglasses.

"It's called streaming, and it's a gamer's thing thank you very much." Brendan corrected as he opened the doors. "Hop in, love birds."

"God, I hope you didn't try to smoke here." Hans complained, smelling the smoke from Brendan's shirt. "What's with the sunglasses?"

"Well, y'know Elias? My classmate who we'll meet up later on at the bar tonight for some drinks?" Brendan removed his sunglasses revealing his bloodshot eyes as he took out a miniature pack of dried leaves. "He gave me some of-"

"Can you at least hide that somewhere else?" Hans exclaimed. "I stand against extra-judicial killings but that doesn't mean I tolerate the use of illegal drugs."

(Drugs are illegal in the country. The administration in 2018 had a brutal war on drugs that killed many innocents)

"Wait, you're going drinking tonight?" Adriana asked. "I thought we're going to the cinemas?"

The two boys suddenly went quiet, realizing some plans overlapped.

"And you're going with some people you just met who are in to doing those things?" She added. Getting disappointed, she opened the door out. "Whatever."

She walked out, leaving the two boys inside.

"Way to go, Brendan." Hans said, annoyed as he left the car and followed Adriana.

Brendan watched the two, quarrelling for some time but eventually hugging it out.

"Tsk." Brendan clicked his tongue. "Couples."

Lunes, Setyembre 25, 2018 (6:20 PM)

"Oh, kasya pa dalawa!" The barker shouted, banging the jeep as passengers tried to squeeze their way in.

(Oh, kasya pa dalawa. Literally translates to "Two more can fit.")

The jeep was already full, but since it's rush hour they're trying to overfill it again. She's already squeezed as she tried to use her phone. Normally, Hans would drop her off home but since the just-this-week-with-the-boys card had been pulled out, she had no choice but to commute. She opened her Facebook Messenger and searched for BJ Delgado.

Adriana: Brendan, are u there

BJ: yea

Adriana: is Hans still with u

BJ: yea

Adriana: are there any other girls there?

"Bayad po." An old lady passed her coins to her.

("Bayad po" is what you say when you're passing your fare to the jeep driver.)

"Alis na! Puno na!" The barker shouted after the jeep's overcrowded with some clinging to the rails behind the jeep.

("Alis na! Puno na!" the barker is telling the driver that jeep's already full.)

Adriana noticed that Brendan left her on seen. The jeep then started, braving the streets of Quezon City as coins and bills were being passed. Still, Brendan's on seen and she can't get it out of her mind. She made an effort to type again despite being squeezed by two large passengers.

Adriana: ???

BJ: slr. no girls, just me and the boys

BJ: no worries. i gotchu

BJ sent a GIF

Adriana: ok thanks

Adriana: if he gets drunk, pls drive him home

BJ: don't have a license but sure

BJ sent a GIF

Adriana: thanks. u enjoy guys

One of the passengers seated beside her left after a few minutes, finally giving her space. She took out her handouts and began reading the history of the French language under the bright orange light. Hans took a degree in History, Brendan took Biology, while she took French. She was originally going to take Tourism, but held back as her mother thought it was too expensive so she took the one that'll still give her an advantage when her aunt takes her to Quebec. Still, she wasn't happy as it was almost like she couldn't decide for herself. Tourism and French, both weren't even on her target. She wanted to be a teacher but her mother said there's no money in that, and always tells her to go abroad.

Her phone vibrated, getting a message from Brendan sending a video of Hans singing Ikaw Lamang by Silent Sanctuary. It was his favorite song, and it was their favorite band. She opened her Facebook and searched for Evelyn Tamayo but getting no familiar accounts. Sighing, she opened up her dummy account and found the account, still showing the previous posts she was tagged in when they were still in high school.

(Listen to Ikaw Lamang here - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QbvLa-mm0fI&ab_channel=KBBLyricsPH%F0%9F%8E%B5)

She then opened her dummy Instagram account, searching @tamsieevelyn and scrolling her posts. Evelyn and her friends looked so happy, and she was envious. The page refreshed and a new post appeared of the four friends posing near the statue of their campus. A moment later, a like popped up.

@hanz_lcntr likes this.

She couldn't believe what she just saw. She refreshed the app and suddenly the like disappeared. Oh God, am I imagining things again?

Adriana: Brendan

Adriana: are you guys still there

Her chats weren't delivered and Brendan was inactive now. She opened Hans' chat, seeing him inactive for an hour.

Adriana: are there any other girls with you?

She suddenly realized that she was already a few blocks pass her house. "Manong, para po! Para!"

("Para" is what you say when you're going to depart the jeep.)

Martes, Setyembre 26, 2018 (6:39 AM)

Hans left her on seen last night which made her anxious. Brendan did send her pictures of Hans passed out on the passenger seat, but it wasn't enough. She needs answers, direct answers from Hans. She ate her breakfast while scrolling her Facebook timeline. Her mother noticed that she barely finished her food.

"You should finish that or else you'll be late." Her mother pointed out as she sipped her coffee. "Who knows if you'll get stuck in traffic."

"I'll just take a habal if I'm gonna be late." Adriana said, earning an irk from her mother.

(Habal is like the term used for riders who offer their motors or cars for transport. They often charge twice than online car/motor booking)

"Habal? Dios mio, Adriana." Her mother sighed. "Your father died from drunk driving a motorcycle in Batangas. I'm not letting you ride a random driver's motorcycle here in QC."

"It's practical, ma." She reasoned, finally getting a chat from Hans to pick her up

Hans: hey, sorry forgot to reply, was in a rush. I'm here now.

"No, it's not practical."

Sighing, she quickly finished her breakfast and brushed her teeth.

"I'm going to the palengke later. What do you want for dinner?" Her mother asked. "Or are you going out with Evelyn again? Tell her to drop here sometimes."

(Palengke is the wet market)

Her mother was now used on using Evelyn as a reason for coming home late. Have a movie night with Hans? Evelyn. Date at the mall? Evelyn. Going to a party? Evelyn.

"Don't know if we have a girl's night out later but I'd like a chicken for tomorrow." She answered, then leaving. "Bye!"

Opening the door, she already dreaded the stairs of their apartment. Being at the 4th floor wasn't too nice, but it was the cheapest they could afford in the area. She was already exhausted the moment she got out the building. Instead of crossing the overpass, she walked a few meters away from the building to the gasoline station where Hans waited for her.

"Good morning, beautiful." Hans greeted. There was an attempt.

She opened the door, sitting beside him as always but now she was silent as Hans started the car. The stoplight turned red and that's when Hans spoke.

"Okay, I'm sorry last night. I was drunk." He started.

"Where were you?"

"I was at the bar with the guys near SM North, you know that."

"You didn't even bother answering my question last night."

"I didn't because it's not even worth answering, okay? Why would you care if there are other girls inside the bar?"

"So, there are girls with you in the bar?"

"Yes!" He finally admitted. "But we don't know them!"

"And I suppose they mingled with you guys?"

"Diyos ko po, Adriana!" Hans raised his voice. "It's not a guys exclusive bar, we're bound to meet girls there and socialize."

She wanted to bring up the Instagram like, but she kept silent. "At least answer me next time."

"God, you don't trust me even a bit." He said, annoyed now as the light went green. "If you want to fully trust me then live with me, okay? My sister will be moving out next month and we can have all the day together. No secrets, no overthinking, no accusations, just you and me under one roof."

She went silent after that, knowing how complicated things were.

"I'm still a secret, am I?" Hans asked, he got no response but he could hear her sob. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

The ride was full of her crying and Hans apologizing. When they reached the campus, Hans gave her a hug before they went to each other's respective building.

Martes, Setyembre 26, 2018 (8:10 AM)

"Larusca." Professor Marcel Belda called, just noticing that there were only six people in his class. "Ou est Mary Larusca?"

One of the students raised her hand. "Sir, Mary got a positive pregnancy test and her husband doesn't-"

"En francais, s'il vous-plait." Marcel said.

"Eh… Mary est partie parce-que elle est enceinte." Adriana said, earning a praise from Marcel.

"Well, someone has it up her vocabulary." One of her classmates teased. Everyone laughed.

Now that Mary was out of the class, she's out of friends as the rest of her classmates seemed to get along with each other except her. It was going to be a rough semester, she feels it, and the fact that she felt so isolated makes her want to reconsider her course. She wanted to be close to Hans at least, but history bores the hell out of her. Adriana doesn't know what she wants, but she knows what she needs. Friends.

"Hi, excuse me but is this the French class?" A girl peeked from the door.

"Yes, and you are?" Marcel asked.

"Sarah Natividad." The girl replied as she entered. Tall and tanned, she almost looked like a model when she entered. "I'm from the Italian class, but it got dissolved because apparently I was the only student because the other two they were expecting were in a different class so… here I am."

"I see. So Ms. Natividad, you can sit beside Ms. Villar over there." Marcel pointed the vacant seat beside her as he started to write on the white board. "No worries, you can still catch up with the week's lessons. You can borrow Villar's handouts if you want."

Sarah was giddy when she entered the room, as if she was very pumped up. Adriana shared some of her handouts and chatted for a bit until she realized something.

"Wait…" Sarah said. "You're from the province too, right? I can tell it by your accent."

"Well, yeah…" Adriana replied. "From Batangas, actually."

"Oh, Batangas? Where? Laiya? San Juan?" Sarah asked excitedly. "I love snorkeling in Batangas."

"Sorry. I'm from Sto. Tomas."

"Oh, the one with the Padre Pio shrine!" She was amazed how Sarah kept the conversation going. "I'm actually from Jomalig, Quezon. Beaches and surfing are my thing, you should go with your friends there during summer. Trust me, it's fun!"

"Ssssh, quiet down a little." Marcel warned.

The two looked at each other and giggled quietly.

"Sorry, but I don't have friends." Adriana admitted.

"Eh? Why?" Sarah asked. "Let me guess, you're one of the weirdos right?"

"Maybe…"

"So that makes two of us now." Sarah said. Adriana just realized she befriended her. "Now, the weird thing about me is I have my third eye open and most people think it's not true, but trust me I'm seeing ghosts in a daily basis."

Adriana smiled sheepishly. Sarah knows how to keep a conversation lively and she just wants to keep up with her. C'mon Adriana, say something weird to your weird new friend. Keep it going, you can do it!

"I…" She closed her eyes. "…um… I don't shave my armpits."

Sarah looked at her awkwardly for a few seconds before they both burst into laughter.

Martes, Setyembre 26, 2018 (11:30 AM)

Outside the campus gates was a barangay named after the university. Dorms and carinderias were everywhere, but Sarah knows the one with the best silogs. Hans was still in his class, and she was excited on introducing the friend she made. It wasn't much, but it was quality.

(Carinderias are local eateries located almost everywhere. Silogs are combinations of fried egg, fried rice, and whatever meal you choose. So for tapsilog, the meal is tapa)

"So, I've been thinking…" Adriana started, slicing her tapa.

"Thinking's good." Sarah remarked, eating her tapsilog. "What is it?"

"I've been thinking if it's valid to feel a little paranoid when you saw your boyfriend liking your… um… ex-friend's Instagram post?" She finally blurted out.

Sarah looked at her in the eye. "I'm sorry, but um… I can't give a really good advice for this. NBSB here."

(NBSB - No Boyfriend Since Birth)

"Oh, I didn't expect that. You're like… pretty and all." She complimented.

"Bolera!" Sarah laughed. "But for me girl, just because you ended your friendship with her doesn't mean your boyfriend has to dislike her too."

(Bolera/o - someone who flatters you)

Adriana went quiet after that, watching Sarah finish her rice. She looked at hers, rice half-finished with the tapa almost gone.

"Unless…" Sarah continued.

"Unless what?"

Sarah continued to chew after that, still feeling hungry. She stood up to order another cup of rice, while Adriana finished the last strip of meat. She set aside her plate and opened her Instagram to stalk Evelyn whose account is now private. Damn.

"Hey, hope I'm not disturbing." A guy with glasses approached her table, looking at his ID lace, he's not from here. "Would you mind answering a questionnaire for my thesis?"

"Sure, no problem." She said, then reading the title.

Overlapping Effects of Social Media and Bullying on College Students in Katipunan

"Hey, you must be Hans! I'm Sarah." Sarah greeted as she sat with two cups of rice. "Nice to meet you!"

"Um… no, that's not Hans." Adriana corrected as she filled out the form.

"Name's Eric, I'm conducting my thesis research here." Eric introduced. "I hope you don't mind you answer too?"

"Later, still eating."

"Done." Adriana said, handing out the form to him.

"Wow, these are a lot of checks." Eric remarked, looking at Adriana. "I hope you're okay."

"Thanks." Adriana smiled sheepishly.

"Oh, and by the way I'm part of a band. If you don't mind, you can also like our Facebook page Minute by Minute." Eric said. "And like our recent cover, please. It helps us a lot."

"Sure." Adriana said, liking their page and the video. "Anything else?"

"My friend who studies here thinks you're cute." Eric said to Sarah, then pointing outside.

There was a boy leaning on a car, smoking a cigar as he nodded at them. Sarah looked at Eric in complete disbelief.

"Ew."

Myerkules, Setyembre 27, 2018 (2:30 PM)

Hans plucked some tunes from his guitar for a lazy Wednesday where they have the longest vacant times. Adriana rested her head on his lap, reading her handouts as they hang out under the gazebo. His phone started vibrating but he just tuned his guitar. It started beeping after the missed call.

"Aren't you gonna answer that?" Adriana asked.

"Probably my dad so no." Hans said, sighing. "He always calls at this time."

"You should at least talk to your dad." She said, a bit disappointed knowing how much his parents like her. "At least he's making an effort."

"Easy for you to say." He said dryly. "Not easy for me to do since he mocks every life decision I make. I really had a breather when he and mom went abroad to Germany."

"He's still your dad, Hans." She reasoned, then sitting up. "You're even named after him; you even look like him."

"Oh God, please don't remind me." He said laughingly, then Adriana started to pinch his nose and twirl his curls.

"You have that pointy nose of yours, and those cute curls, and that Hans look." She teased. "Sarah said you look like a foreigner."

"Okay, enough. I'll answer my dad if you stop teasing me like that, alright?" He took out his phone.

"Okay." She smiled, then watching his disappear.

"Oh, shit. It wasn't dad, it's Brendan." He said, scrolling his messages. "That idiot overtimed at the internet café and got short of cash."

"You gonna bail him out?"

"Yep. Jesus, he really needs a girlfriend to get out of that life." He sighed, standing up. "You coming?"

"No, I'm waiting for Sarah." She said, then leaning in close for a quick kiss. "See you later, I love you."

"I love you too."

She waited at the gazebo, but she had to leave when a group of students entered to practice their speech choir. She strolled around, watching groups of friends walk with her laughing or gossiping with one another. She felt so alone, but still found comfort while walking under the shady trees. Noticing a familiar girl sitting by a bench, she decided to take a deep breath and approach her.

"Evelyn…" Adriana said, catching Evelyn's attention from her book but she immediately rolled her eyes and went back reading.

"Evelyn, I…" She muttered, gaining her strength to say something. "… I miss you, and the girls, and… and everything about us. I'm sorry, I really am."

Evelyn closed her book angrily, and looked at her. "What do you want, Adriana?"

"I… I want you to forgive me." She answered honestly, though it may not be the best answer. "I'm so sorry."

"You want me to forgive you because you're a selfish bitch." Evelyn scoffed. "I don't need your petty apology, Adriana. Live with the fucking guilt, because that's what people like you, isang malanding pokpok, deserve."

("Isang malanding pokpok" - a flirty slut)

With that final string of painful words, Evelyn stood up and stormed away. Adriana froze in place, dreading the sensation of her tears falling again. And it did, flowing down her cheeks like the day Evelyn and her friends blocked her.