"Depra, are you okay!?"
I opened my eyes to see a young girl with the hair of summer and soft blue eyes pleading at me; wait, it was an older girl now.
I sat up, and everyone in the room fell quiet; no, that wasn't it. I put my hand to head, sighing.
"Damn it all to hell."
I felt Lachesis tugging at me sleeves, her kid face pleading at me to not do it; an older girl, about to cry, her gaze filled with worry that felt like a knife plunging into my heart, causing it to ache considerably.
"Damn it all to hell."
I got up, ignoring everyone's cries and pleas as I walked to the door; no, again, that wasn't right.
I felt someone grab my arm, an older girl with neat brown hair and small glasses; a younger girl with messy brown hair that frizzled its way into an afro, reaching out to touch me.
"Your Fault."
I heard giggling, and I wrested my arm away from her, digging into my own thoughts; no, once again, that wasn't it.
I put on my shoes before grabbing the door handle, and I felt someone grab me from behind; the girl with the hair of summer again, yelling out to me once more.
"I'm fine. Just going out for a walk."
She shook her head, begging me for something, and I could only repeat those words:
"I'm fine. Just going out for a walk."
Her eyes widened as she let go, and she yelled at me, causing the giggling to grow louder; I let out a small smile and waved her goodbye, going my own way.
"I'm fine. Just going out for a walk."
No, that wasn't it as well; none of it was right.
I walked out the door, walking away from the unfamiliar warmth.
After all, I couldn't hear a thing they said.
"Your Fault."
The giggling grew to laughter, growing exponentially with each step I took away from that place. The once silent world I was in was now filled with laughter, voices, and the one thing I hated to hear the most:
"Your Fault."
I walked faster, the laughter YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT taking over YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT my YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT
I collapsed, clutching my YOURFAULT as I tried to YOURFAULT once YOURFAULT. Gritting my YOURFAULT, I YOURFAULTYOURFAULT my YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT
In the end, it was worth nothing, huh?
YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT
Huh? The voices, laughter, and YOURFAULT's grew quiet as I felt someone grab my shoulder.
"Who…?"
"Man, you had everyone worried, you know that?"
I looked up to see him, the one and only Hiro I had. I YOURFAULT my teeth, looking away from him.
"…Sorry."
He YOURFAULT, lifting me to my feet. "Don't be. C'mon, let's go home already. You're sleeping with YOURFAULT tonight."
I could only YOURFAULT, leaning on him for support as we walked the long way YOURFAULT.
"You gonna YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT were doing?" He asked, cutting out as the voices waxed and waned.
"I found something YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT." I can't even hear myself speak.
"It wasn't YOURFAULTYOURFAULT? Yeah, I can see that," he said, walking a slow pace with me, his YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT me. "Sometimes, we're better off not knowing the truth."
It sounded like YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT. "I guess being hopeful is a waste of time, huh."
"YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT. It'll hurt, YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT, right?"
"Your Fault."
The laughter grew to a crescendo, and I was once more unable to hear anything as I watched Hiro speak. How did he YOURFAULT me anyway?
He glanced at me and frowned. His lips moved, and all I heard was laughter. I turned away from him, my hair covering my face.
"YOURFAULT, YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT bad, huh?"
I looked through my hair to see we were almost at his house. Did I YOURFAULT all the YOURFAULT on accident?
He opened the door to his house and led me to the kitchen, where I sat down in a chair. I looked away from as he tried to peer into my face, before disappearing.
I felt something cold around my neck, and I watched a necklace with a key get placed on me, and the laughter, the voices, and the YOURFAULT's came to a sudden halt.
"Better?" I looked at Hiro, who grinned at me. Not once since I've met him has he taken his necklace off. Hell, he even showers and sleeps with it.
"Why?" It was the only question I could ask, and he shook his head, sighing to himself.
"You need it more than I do right now," he said, looking me up and down. "It kinda suits you yah know? Hey wait, don't go thinking you can wear it forever now, it is mine, even if it suits you better."
"I DON'T DESERVE IT!" I roared out, pounding my fist on the table, and he frowned at me.
"Well, I say you do, and it's mine, so there? Anyway, I'll be right back."
I don't deserve this. Not kindness, not happiness, nothing positive in my life, I don't deserve any of it.
"They're right, I deserve nothing. Nothing at all, as they take from me everything, my eternal punishment."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I scrolled through my contacts, needing to call not one, but two people. I called the first one, named "Hopeless Idiot," and called her.
"IS HE WITH YOU!?"
I nearly threw my phone from how loud she was. "Damn, he's with me Lachesis. He's staying here, so don't worry."
"DON'T WORRY!? HOW THE HELL CAN I NOT STAY WORRIED!? YOU SAW HOW HE WAS! HE COULDN'T, He couldn't…"
She trailed off, and I sighed. "I know. But he's with me, and he's fine for the time being. If I can say, what the fuck happened for him to be like this? You owe me some goddamn answers."
Silence, and I could feel my anger rising. "Damnit, I don't have time for your bullshit! He's my best friend goddamnit, and the only thing I can do is lend him my key for a while so he doesn't do what!? Go batshit insane!? Break under whatever hell he's going through right now, only able to say, 'I consoled him the best I can!? ANSWER ME LACHESIS!"
"He remembered something. I honestly didn't think he would remember, but it's just the same as last time, he-!"
"What did he remember!?" I yelled out, and I could see Luna peeking out from up the stairs.
"Big bro, is everything alright?"
I sighed, relaxing my body while doing so. "No, I'm alright. I'll call you down in a second, alright? I'm gonna need your godly cooking skills soon."
She frowned, tilting her head. "But we've already ate dinner."
Ah, I could never stay mad while looking at her. "You're right about that lil sis. When I get done talking, I'll explain, alright?"
She nodded, giving off her adorable smile. "You got it big bro!" And then she left, going back to her room.
I sighed again, before focusing back on the conversation. "You know what, tell me later. I've gotta help Depra right now. I'll call you, so don't think about calling me. It's your own damn fault he's like this to begin with."
Before she could say anything, I hung up. I walked to the stairs and collapsed on the first step, groaning. I really wish she would just realize already, before it's too late…
I glanced at my phone, calling the second person on my list, aptly named, "Panda Bear."
I brought my phone to my ear, waiting for her to pick up. I heard the phone click, and a soft voice called out.
"Is he with you?"
I glanced at the phone before speaking. "Yeah, he's with me. If I tell you my address, will you come over?"
"So, he's okay?"
"No. He's most definitely not. That's why I need you Pandy."
Silence, and then she spoke. "I'll be there within five minutes."
"I haven't even told you where I'm at yet, how do you expect to get here in five minutes?"
"I'll be there, so don't worry."
Oh, she's probably going to do that. "Alright, see you in five then." I hung up and sent her my address before getting back to my feet, stretching out my limbs.
"Alright, now for my adorable sister to take the spotlight," I murmured, and I walked up the stairs, going down the hallway to reach her room, where she was waiting outside her door.
"How long you been standing out there?" I asked, and she shook her head, her eyes gazing into mine.
"Is it about big bro Depra?" So she heard enough.
"Yeah, it is. He's in a lot of pain right now, so as his family, we gotta do our best to help him out." I placed my hand on her head and ruffled up her long auburn hair. "I'm pretty sure he hasn't eaten yet, so if you could make him some food, that would be great."
She nodded, and I smoothed out her hair before smiling at her. "I'm counting on yah!"
"Gotcha! I'll make a meal so good he'll forget all about his pain!"
I watched her skip downstairs humming to herself, and I ran my fingers through my growing afro, sighing.
"We're the only ones he can really count on. So, even if it isn't much, I'll help him get back to his feet."