when I saw her all I could think about was how much I loved her but could never tell her
my feelings for her. Saki had told me before that she couldn't fall in love with me unless she
could get revenge on the person who killed her father. Saki couldn't now knowing I the man she
did love that took her father away.
Saki was walking towards me slowly one arm bleeding from the attack and the others
reaching out for me. I slowly reached out so I could try to hold Saki in his arms, I wanted to
reach out for her, hold her in my arms and wash all her pain away with my love for her, but I
couldn't give her the affection she so desperately wanted. When it came down to it all I could do
was give her my hand so that I could help her along the look in her face was full of pain and
regret. Her eyes where so desolate, she could have made anyone's heart break in an instant. I
can never tell her how I feel for her, she won't take me as I am and I know that… As we walked
Saki pulled her hand away aggressively. In shock I turned to look at her, she was so beautiful as she stood there strong and also, so fragile as the blood continued to run down her arm to her
fingertips to the ground, which already was turning crimson. I opened my mouth to speak,
nothing came out. I stare into her eyes I comprehended that something needed to be said.
"We must get you back to light so he can help heal your wounds Saki," I said as I looked
in to her fierce but painful eyes.
"Manchu, I can't pretend anymore, the way I feel for you, I told you once that I could
love you After revenge. Now that I know you are the one I must kill I can't the truth is I do love
you, I always have. I just didn't know how to say it or show you in a way you could understand,
I will take you as you are. All the time we had together, even when you saw me naked in the
moonlight at the lake." Tears now started to fall like tiny diamonds. "I thought you loved me too
I always try to keep the good memories not the bad ones, in my heart. Do you not love me
Manchu!!!" she finally yelled as the sobbing kept on
"Saki, we are all here for a reason, mine is to find the zodiac warriors, if you still want to
stay by my side that is your choice." I said cold heartedly as I looked to the ground of crimson. I
could tell she had lost a lot of blood which worried me so I kept on. "We all have a mission to
complete and feelings of love is a joke in these times of war. You can say you love me but I
know it isn't true women can't even keep their thoughts or emotions in check when they need
too. There will never be anything between us." I finished lying about how I felt and looked up.
She stood there crying harder than she was before I knew I tore her heart apart at that
instant but I knew I had to for the future of our country. It seems like every time all we could do
was hurt each other it just goes back and forth but I knew the moment I looked back up at her
there was no coming back from what I just did. I reached out to touch her left arm because it was
the one that wasn't as injured.
She slapped my hand away her face reminded me of the way my mother looked at me
when she knew she was going to have to leave me, heartbroken, scared, and not knowing what
would happen next. Even though Saki had saved me several times an all the moment we had that
were good and bad all I could think of was myself…
"listen Saki…" I tried to speak but she interrupted
"Manchu Junjie you have said enough I was foolish to open my heart to you, now I know
how you feel for me and those feelings will never grow. I am pregnant... Remember that night
you tried to kill me? I went to a healer to see what was wrong with me. always getting sick for no
reason. I have to say goodbye for now, I will not stay by your side knowing that you have no
feelings for me or even feelings about how you will be a father. I'm sorry I kept it from you but
your soul is becoming more corrupt. Even if you do you will always lie to yourself." She said as
she ran off into the forest.
My heart dropped what did I do? I tried to run after her but I couldn't seem to move my
body. The pain in my body felt so surreal my heart ached and my body became numb I had never
felt like this. I thought of her face, her eyes when I told her, watching her tears trickling down her cheeks, her soft hair as It blow in the wind as she ran away at that instant. I finally gained control of my body and chased after her but I couldn't seem to find her, I
let her into my heart as well but the one mistake she made now seemed pointless. We seemed to
hold foolish things agents each other, I had one chance to tell her how I felt and it was gone in an
instant. I lost the person I loved the most due to my pride. I sluggishly walked back to camp
where light waited for me and Saki to return. But I would be returning alone that night.
I finally made it back to camp where light was cooking fish that we caught earlier that
day. Light looked back and when he saw me he smiled, his smile quickly changed into a frown.
"Where is Saki? She isn't dead, is she?" He said nervously. ``now that we have the rat on
our side we should have Saki here with us. I know She is a strong woman who can hold her own
I know that but I still worry." He said as he slowly turned the fish
"No, she isn't dead, yet. She couldn't stay by my side anymore." Light noticed the look
on my face. "Um… anyways she is hurt badly and I tried to get her to come back so you could
help her… She wanted to leave…" I said as I sat down on a log nearby with my back turned to
light.
"So, you didn't tell her you loved her too? She knew you did, the way you two are always
ready to be there for one another, well she was there for you way more" light laughed "She
would have died for you. You know that right Junjie? She would have done anything for you, all
she wanted was your affection. Why couldn't you give her that?"
I couldn't answer him I am a fool, after everything even Light knew what I couldn't see.
We only have known each other for six months. Could this be true love could we be soulmates
why does my heart feel so empty? The pain I feel inside is more painful than I ever thought it
could be. I may never see her again, or when I do she may be with someone else. For the first
time, I realized how much I truly loved her. Now she may never come back I lost my world in a
matter of minutes.
"So, I'm guessing you just realized, even when you told her you killed her father, she
stood by your side." Light said in an uplifted tone
"Enough Light!!! We need to go to bed... " I snapped not even thinking
"Okay, I'm sorry I didn't mean to hit a nerve, I am with you and will be your support even when
your in the wrong." Lights face changed grim "Not being one of the 12 zodiacs though maybe a
problem, I am simply the cat who lost his place due to a rat, that I am now friends with...hmmm,
who would have figured that. It will be a hard road to travel." He said with a sigh
I knew what he meant now that Saki is gone… never mind that I can do this on my own,
I've… maybe... I can't give up to this point I have always had Light and Saki by my side. Also,
Saki has helped me with several of the warriors if it wasn't for her I could have never beaten the
Ox, and she took a hit from the horse so we could finish him off. It's funny how you don't know
what you have until it's gone. I sighed heavily as I tried to go to bed that night.
Meanwhile Saki had stopped by her sister's home close to the city Light and Junjie would
soon enter. Her sister was the healer she was talking about who told her she was pregnant. She was always there for Saki when she needed help. I knocked on the door hoping she was still
awake to bandage my wounds and possibly some stitches.
"Hold on a minute I will be with you soon." She said
The door opened and she saw me bloody barely able to walk I was surprised I could even get
their but I guess when you need to get away from someone your body is capable of anything.
"What happened Saki? Oh my god I have never seen you this bad not even with the hit
you took from the Ox, I mean don't get me wrong that was a bad injury as well." She said as she
helped me walk to the table. She sat me down and looked at the cut on my arm. By this point I
could barely move my body I felt like a motionless corps just waiting to die.
"Hey Saki, can you hear me? Saki, I need you to stay awake don't close your eyes
Saki!!!" she yelled
To me it sounded like a faraway echo like she was miles away I had to say something to
let her know I was still there my eye site started to fade.
"Cherry I…" everything turned to black before I could finish
I found myself in a dark place I was floating, I was laying down on my back I couldn't
move even though I was floating. Suddenly a bright light was shining on me. I looked at my
arms and legs I was chained to a table.
"What the hell is going on?? Cherry??" I yelled
I finally found the strength to move, the more I moved the tighter the bonds would become, the
light started to dim and I started to hear a voice like a whisper next to my ear.
"I will protect you I promise." It was a male's voice
When I realized whose voice it was, I couldn't help but cry I couldn't stop crying. He
isn't here, I'm alone he has never protected me before… I knew that was a lie I just wanted to
believe it even for a moment. He can't even be honest with himself and how he feels. The cuffs
that kept me strapped to the table kept tightening I could start to feel blood in my hand dripping
through my fingers. What do you want from me? Do you want to use me because I make it easy
for you? Do you want me to stop caring so much about you? You were desperate remember, you
don't want me or need me. Should I walk away? I can't keep all these feelings inside they have
me trapped if I don't ask I will never know.
If the answer is something I don't like I can't keep my feelings trapped inside my heart or
I will lose myself he knows how I feel, but I will never know how he feels and may never know,
I think that's what hurt the most. Will it make it easier to let him go? to let him be free? I don't
need a hero, I don't need someone to be my knight. Then why can't I let him go? why can't I
stop loving him? Even when he treats me like I'm nothing, like a waste of time, like I need to
just disappear from his life. That thought made my heart hurt. If I must let him go. I felt my
feelings I had deep inside my heart, somewhere I didn't have to feel the pain anymore. The cuffsopened I stood up back into the darkness I saw my sword in front of me glowing instead of being
a sword it changed to a staff the top of the staff was a huge blade that made its way half way
down the goldenrod. It stood 6 feet tall at the bottom of the rod about twelve inches above the
crystal that it stood on was a monkey holding onto the rod my sign is now reviled.
When I opened my eyes, there stood cherry looking over me. I looked down and found
myself naked.
"Why am I naked?" I asked
"you passed out I had to cut your kimono off to get to your wounds." She replied
"Oh, thank you! cherry for saving me" I sighed and looked away from her
"Your welcome Saki" Cherry said back bubbly and happy but then soon realized her
sister looked distracted "Hey Saki are you alright? You seem to be distracted?" she said
questionably
"Yeah, I thought I may have lost too much blood, to survive." I said as I rubbed the scar
that I got from the horse
"Yes, you did lose a lot of blood but nothing a master healer like me couldn't handle you
will have to rest a few days before going out but it seems that those aren't the wounds that are
bothering you it seems like an internal injury" Cherry said in a concerned way "I know you Saki
it's something else I'm here for you if you want to talk about it" Cherry said lovingly
"It's just inside injuries nothing that can be done about those." I said as I stood up and
grabbed a kimono "I have to just stop letting men in to my heart sister. The first time I thought I
could trust someone with it they destroy it." I laughed
"I'm so sorry Saki I wish I could help you with this pain but there is even things that I
can't heal all I can say is it takes time, but I will be here with you to overcome all your obstacles
in your way" Cherry said sincere
"I can't stay, I have to help with finding the rest of the Zodiac warriors" I said with a sigh
"I'm sorry Saki I can't let you go you, next time you may not be able to survive a battle
of that extant you would die dear sister, you have to stay and heal in three days' time you can
leave. I don't want you to die. Then I won't have anyone left" Cherry said with eyes full of tears.
Cherry slowly moves over to Saki and hugs her with her body shaking and tears rolling down her
cheeks,
"Fine, for you I will stay for three days, but after that I must leave and continue and find
the Zodiac." I said as I hugged her back
"Thank you Saki I am really happy you decided to stay, I love you sister" Cherry said
happily
" I love you too! Sister" I said as I sat down