For the love of my Life
I was once told that imagination
is useless, it is knowledge that is way
more important. Although, both go hand in hand.
Whomever reads this book, I want you to know anything
is possible with hope, knowledge, imagination,
and the will to keep going. Even when you feel like you
can't, please enjoy my work and remember you can
do anything you put your mind to, even when others are telling
you, you can't.
The ashes burned my eyes, The heat from the flames burned my face. As my mother
helped me out of the house I remember my father and sister's cold lifeless bodies on the kitchen
floor, the arrow that had pierced their hearts would be in my nightmares forever. As my mother
held me close to her chest I could feel her arms embracing me tightly almost so tight I could
barely breathe. I was soon to forget about that as I heard her heart pounding inside her chest, I
could hear her breathing heavily as her tears engulfed my face. I could still feel the burning of
the ash in my eyes. The fire soon became a twister of death that covered our house, as she
continued to run I found myself mirrored in the eyes of my mother. I saw eyes that would soon
find a life as a worrier. Was this my destiny a lonely warrior only wanting revenge and death? I
looked away from my mother's eyes and away from my reflection, away from the lonely life I
saw I would lead. I had seen enough of my young terrified face filled with tears, sad with grief. I
felt my mother stop quickly as we heard horses roaring back up the road. My mother quickly
placed me in the bushes maybe a mile away from the death stained ground where our house once
stood. Now what stood in its place was a firestorm that started to spread through the forest. The
smoke was thick and was harsh on my lungs, every time I tried to speak I found myself coughing
hard. It didn't help that I also was crying and could hardly stand the sadness in my heart. I didn't
take my eyes off my mother, even though the burning from the ashes wouldn't let me keep my
eyes open for too long.
I closed my eyes briefly to try and stop the pain, but I didn't need to open them again, I
knew what was to come next my mother was going to leave me. The thought of losing her
pierced my heart like a knife. My mother gently grasped my hand my eyes swung open in an
instant my eyes met hers I could see the fear in her eyes as I looked deeper into her eyes I could
see myself and how scared I was I grasped on to her dress and pulled her closer to me. She
inadequately pushed my small breakable hands off her dress as she stood up and said
"I must go there has been too much death today my child, you must live my sweet boy.
Please remember I love you, Tadao, and please don't forget me." She said as the tears pouring
out of her eyes like waterfalls.
My mother walked in to the middle of the open space in front of me I observed in dismay
as the men on horses grabbed her by her hair and hauled her around before getting off their
horses only a few feet in front of me. As they started to tear off her clothing violently, and rape
her. I could feel my fists bleeding from how hard I was squeezing my fists together I could feel
my fingernails dig into my flesh. I couldn't hold myself back any longer I stood up. As I did a
man riding a horse stopped right in front of me. As I looked into his eye I could see his eyes
burning. He's eyes where a crimson color and the smell of blood was harshly coming off him. I
stood frozen as he looked at me coldly. I could still hear my mother screaming as they
deflowered her over and over.
"Boy," the man started to say then paused for a moment his tone was cold and
intimidating to me I was only ten years old. "Stay down and be silent" he finished.
I didn't want to it took everything in me to just stand and watch the men hurt my mother,
I watch through the bushes from behind the man's horse. Then suddenly he galloped over to the
other man and pleaded with them to stop what they were doing to my mother. I looked into my
mother's eyes one last time as she lay sprawled out on the ground. My mother's almost lifeless
eyes stared at me with the glam of light flashed throw them as she mouthed the words "I love
you" then the light was completely gone from her eye's and I knew she was gone her lifeless
body didn't move and I sat there praying that I could see her smile once more. But that was never
to be…
The men mounted their horses, but for the one who had never gotten off his horse. Then
they took off back down the road before sunrise. I ran to my mother's body and held her close to
me. I wept as the sun started to raise, her body was cold and colorless. I was weak and couldn't
do anything to save her. My fragile hands were covered in blood and dirt, I hated these seven
men who killed my mother I felt the anger well up inside of my heart it was a burning desire to
destroy these men. It burned like the fire that completely demolished my home in a quick gulp.
Like that fire I could now feel a blazing storm that filled my heart. I must have sat there for a
couple hours when I finally stopped crying my eyes where swollen from crying I noticed the ash
started to fall like snow around me. I placed my mother's body lightly back on the ground and
walked back to my house, I could still feel the warmth from the wood that was burning
sluggishly in the dime light. I Found a shovel laying by a tree close to where the man with crimson eyes was on his horse he must have left it there for me to find without the other men
seeing him do so.
I grabbed my father's body first and drug it to where my mother's body lay. Then
returned to get my sisters burned corpse as well, I placed her next to our father's. I spent the rest
of the day into the next morning burying my family's body's together so that they would never
really be alone. I gathered stones and placed them on top of the fresh dirt I had piled on top of
them. After the rocks were carefully placed on the grave I collected wild flowers hoping the
grave would look beautiful just like their lives and love were to me.
I looked at my hands cut and blistered from digging and cutting myself with my nails.
But they didn't hurt not as bad as my heart did, I started to replay what had happened over in my
head, I tried to make sense of it all. The more I thought about it the weaker I felt inside but also
the madder I got. I had to find a way to become stronger and take revenge for what those men
had done to my family. I was completely alone knowing I had nowhere to go, no one to go to,
my heart sunk in my chest. I felt my hunger kick in as the sun started to rise I decided to start
walking I remembered a town my mother used to take me too. I thought if only I could make it
there just maybe, I could find someone to help me get food and clothes. The cloth that covered
my feet weren't meant for long walks. My shoes had burned up in the fire, I had no choice my
clothing was stained black from the fire. I sluggishly got up off the ground and started to walk,
the rocks and branches that covered the ground hurt my feet but it didn't matter nothing did, right
now I was alone. I lost everything that meant anything to me there was nothing left to lose.