...It hurts.
So this is how it feels like to get rammed by a truck. Everything hurts. My head. My body. My legs...
My heart.
My goddamn heart crushed not only by the weight of the truck but also by my lover.
...Or should I say my ex-lover? That playboy who plays around even when he is in a relationship with me. The fucking bastard.
Is it not enough that I've sacrificed everything for him? Is it not enough that I've given away all of me just so he can get his greatest wish fulfilled? I've thrown away my family and my future just to be with him; the action that sparked the rage of my father and the tears of my mother when they know the bright future I should be having is no more because of him.
Was everything worth this ending I got?
You said that you will always be with me. You said that you will never betray me. You said you will never abandon me should the society and everyone else shunned me. The promises you made is as empty as the mansion we shared back when we are still together. The mansion we bought to celebrate the success of our first album.
I remember the times when we struggled to live after we moved to this place. Said times were hard as we barely get enough money to buy food for our stomach and paying the rent of our small, 1 room apartment. It was a hard time yet we still persist to continue living and trying to make your dream come true.
It was your ultimate dream, is it not? To be able to perform not only in front of the crowd in the bar we work but to the world as well. To show them the music you made and to inspire people with the lyrics you come up with. It was not an easy feat but all the hard work pays off now that you're one of shiniest star in the music industry.
You told me I was the reason of your- no, our success. It was all possible because of my voice that I lend you for our band. Your songs will not have any meaning if I'm not the one who sing them. Said songs will not be as alive, as sentimental or as any comparison you've come up with if my voice isn't the one that accompany it. Do you know that your words made me flustered? Have you got any idea how happy I am when you said them to me along with that big, goofy grin plastered on your face? And you blush as well. You don't always blush but when you do your red tinted cheek is really adorable.
Well, screw you.
Damn you for making me feel that happy. Damn you for making me believe that all those sweet words you whispered to me are true. Damn you for making me feel that everything I've thrown away is not worth the life I'm living after knowing you cheated on me.
Damn you for making me love you this much.
What did I do to deserve this kind of ending? How did I wronged you until you dare to show off with your new lover on my birthday? Was it fun to invite me to celebrate at our favorite place and then slap me with facts that I'm dumped? Were the 6 years we spent together means nothing to you? Was it fun to toy with me and my feelings and trampled on it once you are bored playing with it?
Is it satisfying for you to be the reason of my death?
….Yeah. I'm already dead.
I'm dead yet I don't know why I'm standing here, staring at my cold body resting in a black casket; a beautifully carved casket of my favorite color. How serene the expression on my face is. It's as if I died in peace and not in rage after being cheated by the person who claimed to always love me. I'm not surprised seeing the cheating bastard here in my funeral but that sad face of his sickened me.
How dare you come knowing that you're the reason of this event? Right now I want nothing but to punch that handsome face of yours. If you think sitting there beside the rest of our band members looking defeated, looking dejected and having red, puffy eyes will move me, think again. Know that no matter what you do, I will never fall for it again.
I will never forgive you. I will--- Huh?
Did I just witnessed someone punching the cheating bastard right on his face and knocked him down onto the floor? The place is in chaos now since everyone is trying to stop the unknown guy from beating the blonde-haired star into a pulp and to peel him off from the star who is starting to retaliate back.
"This is all your fault!" the assailant exclaimed. "This is your fucking fault!! You damn cheating asshole!!"
Amidst the hectic crowd of shouts and people running around, I was stunned. Stunned for several reasons; my ex getting beaten (he deserves it anyway), my quiet funeral that suddenly transformed into a brawl stage and at the complete stranger who showed up unannounced just to hit my ex.
Who is this guy? Do I know him? But I don't think I've met him before. Do my ex or any of the band members know him? It doesn't look like that though. This funeral is held in private and only attended by my ex, the band members, my best friend (the sweet, sweet girl I can always count on), the manager and some staff from the studio.
Who the hell is this guy? How did he entered the hall? What is he doing here? Why did-----Ouch!
I feel a twinge of pain in my head that suddenly escalated into something more excruciating. Grabbing my head with both hands, I kneel down, squeezing my eyes shut as I try to endure the sharp pain and trying to focus back at the scene in front of me. The stranger is trying so hard to land another punch on my ex's face. Did he has something against blonde-haired people? My ex is— Ouch!
…..What is happening? I can't see clearly when squinting and the throbbing pain in my head is not helping when it becomes even painful than before. I'm already dead. It shouldn't be this way…
Argh!! The pain is agonizing!
Someone…anyone…H—