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Our Existence

elmo_2007
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Chapter 1 - The Closet

I sent out the text to Layla (my best friend) and waited anxiously. I bit my lip as she started to reply. This would be the first person I tell that I'm gay, and I would like to keep it that way for awhile. She sent back a text saying she was happy, proud, and not surprised.

"Is it really that obvious?" I thought to myself. Since a lot of my friends had already come out of the closet, I felt out of place. But I did not want to tell the world just yet. I asked myself so many questions, such as "Was this a good idea?" and "What if I'm really not gay?" I felt more anxiety after I told someone than before I did. Many people say that there is a weight lifted off your shoulders once you tell someone. I felt the opposite.

I still had the rest of the weekend to hide my anxiety, so I wouldn't have trouble becoming a perfect friend, student, and son. I tried not to worry about my sexuality but the thought kept coming back to mind. I worked on my homework and hung out with my family as I waited for Monday to come so I could see Layla judging me in person.