"Me too, honey. But it's not the drugs. It's just us."
"But the other injections. The stuff you said would make me lactate. What about that?"
"Sterile saline. Mostly because I needed to be absolutely sure that when the time came for the real thing, both of us would be able to do it without a hitch. I had only one dose and only one chance to administer it. It also helped hydrate your tissues for the rapid growth spurt."
"And the 'nipple sealer'?"
"Liquid bandage. Came out of my medicine cabinet. Keeps the nipples from getting torn from the clamps. I wish I had had that when I wore them."
"So you made all that up about the effects of the drugs?"
"I was making up every word as it came out of my mouth, Sam. A lot of it did not make any sense, but you were not in a position to critique my logic or my performance."
"You should get an award. I was scared to death you were going to cut my nipples off."
"I was scared I would too. I didn't have time to blunt the blades on those clippers. I was being as careful with them as I could and still convince you I was serious."
"Oh, you did! You did! I'll be your little slave forever."
"Promises, promises. By the way, that's the fifth way: daughter, niece, friend, lover, and slave."
"You still owe me for scaring me like that."
"And I'll do anything to make it up to you. What can I do?"
"Take me shopping?"
"Done. Lets get dressed. There is a little store near the mall I want to take you to. They have some darling things that I'd like you to try on."
"Bambi? One more thing: What can we do for Mom?"
"I think I know, honey. I think you do too. So you tell me."
She was right. I knew. I just didn't want to say it. It meant my whole life had to change and I didn't know where it would go from here.
"I need to get away from her. I hate it, but it's best if she doesn't have me there to constantly remind her of how she ruined her life and how she has to keep on doing it for my sake. Maybe she can go back to being herself again."
"I think you are one very smart young lady, Sam. You are perfectly welcome to live here with me, if you like. I know I'd like that very much. And you are old enough to make that decision for yourself."
"I'd like that very much too — Mom, Auntie, Bambi, Dearest Love, and Mistress of Pain."
"Maybe we better leave it at four, honey. I should think you've had enough pain for a long time. Besides, whips, chains, and leather are sooo out this year."
Since there was no way I was going to put that bra back on, I slid my sweater on without it. It had fit well enough before, but now it was really too small. It felt heavy and uncomfortable. The back of the embroidery was scratchy and it hung on me like a tent. School spirit be damned, there was no way I was going to be able to wear a regular uniform now.
It was clear that I was not only going to need a different size, but a different type of clothes, now that my boobs were so much larger. I hoped that I would not have to give up cheerleading, but I had to admit that it was going to be really hard unless I could get a bra that could give me some support without killing me.
After we got dressed, Mrs. Reynolds showed me to my bedroom. It was on the third floor, one floor above hers, down the hall from Jim and across from Bud. When she opened the door I almost fainted. The room was so gorgeous and beautifully decorated that I though a visiting Princess would have been comfortable in it.
There was a big four-poster bed with a floral bedspread in pink and white, a couple of big dressers, a vanity, a blanket chest at the foot of the bed, and some really pretty wallpaper with roses all over it. If I had seen it in a magazine, I would have cut out the photo so I could look at it and wonder if I could ever be lucky enough to live in a place like that. I would also have my own bathroom and a walk-in closet, each of which were the size of my old room.
When she saw how happy I was with the room, Mrs. Reynolds told me, "When we built the house, we were planning on having a boy and a girl, so we decorated two bedrooms with that in mind. When Bud was born, instead of redecorating this room, we put him in the room next to his brother. That room was originally to be a guest room and now the boys share a connecting bathroom. That doesn't bother them, since boys don't need as much time in the bathroom as girls do. It also gives them an incentive to keep it cleaner in there than if just one of them were using it. I wanted to keep this as a girl's room, in case we had more children. I always wanted a daughter, but it never happened. There are two other rooms on the second floor across from my bedroom, but I thought you would like this one better."
"Oh, I do! I really do! It's lovely. Thank you." I said. "But don't say 'never'. Say 'until now'." I could see by the tear that brought to her eye and the way she hugged me that was the best 'thank you' I could have given her. Again I thought how different things were going to be for me, living with someone who loved me and wanted me rather than someone who regretted the day I was born. I wished that I had some things to move into my new room to kind of make it mine. I knew I would have to go back home sometime soon to pack. I didn't want to try to carry over a lot of stuff that would remind me of my life before, but there were some personal things I would need to get — makeup, hair stuff, books, keepsakes and stuff. I had brought enough with me in my overnight bag to get by for a couple of days, and Mrs. Reynolds agreed to drive me over on Saturday morning to fetch the rest. I didn't want to postpone moving out any longer than I had to. The sooner Mom and I got away from each other, the happier we both would be.