We made love two more times that night.
We both remained naked beneath the blanket, exhausted from the sex we had. I didn't feel guilty, with someone like Jafar, I didn't know how much time I would have with him, Toun and Abayomi's ish taught me that you should go for whatever you want, no one knows tomorrow..
I was awake but I was sure he was asleep. Even as he slept, he was so desirable. In another place, another time and in another world, I would have been happy lying next to him. But I had my fears, especially with the dream. I didn't want him to die, he meant the world to me…I was the harshest judge of myself, but in Jafar's case, I would rather be guilty being with him.
When I opened my eyes again, he was not in bed. I checked my phone to see if he had left a message but he hadn't. I called his phone, it rang close to me..i was glad he was still around. I wore the Jersey again, went to the bathroom to clean up then decided to call Timi..
Timi: hey..
Me: you haven't been picking my calls
Timi: I was busy…
Me: Timi, look I am sorry…
Timi: its alright, I guess the heart wants what it wants…
Me: we can still be close friends?
Timi: I would like that..
Me: don't forget to wear black tomorrow…
Timi: sure, my regards to Jafar..
Me: Timi…stop..
Timi: seriously..if he hurts you…tell him I will come for him..
Me: he won't…
Timi: bye …
Me: bye dear…
I felt a weight lifted from my chest after I had spoken to Timi…I called Toun…
Toun: babes..
Me: how are you faring?
Toun: I am better o…I cry less now..
Me: I am glad…
Toun: don't forget to wear black tomorrow..
Me: never…
Toun: how is Timi and Jafar?
Me: hmmmm
Toun: what has been happening?
Me: I broke up with Timi..
Toun: I expected this…
Me: I slept with Jafar last night…
Toun: wow!..you guys are together now?
Me: not really…I don't know…I suspect he will tell me I am not safe in his house and I will have to vacate…but I am inlove with him…
Toun: does he love you?
Me: how will I know, I know he likes me though..
Toun: are you happy?
Me: I am happy, but I am scared…I don't want him to die…
Toun: he won't die…
Me: are you sure?
Toun: yes…
Me: thank you dear, it's such a relief talking to you..
Toun: I would be going to Zenon house on Monday, to pick my passport
Me: that's for your UK Visa?
Toun: yes…mumsi said I need a change in environment…
Me: what if school resumes?
Toun: fvck school!
Me: Just take care of yourself dear..
Toun: you too Tee…
Jafar came in with a cup of tea, two slices of bread and a boiled egg…
Jafar : breakfast for the lady!
Me: I have not brushed yet…I think I left my brush in Ijebu-ode..you have a spare…?
Jafar: smelly mouth….you can use mine…
Me: you can be romantic sometimes o…
Jafar smiled..
Me: I would be going to Sagamu tomorrow to stay with a friend..
Jafar: when?
Me: Tomorrow..
Jafar: what happened between Timi and yourself…
I walked to his bathroom, he followed me..
Me: nothing…
Jafar: you guys had a fight?
Me: no..
Jafar: sooo?
Me: He kissed me and I realized I couldn't kiss him back
Jafar: oh…
Me: what?
Jafar: nothing
Me: talk jor…
Jafar: i'm glad you didn't kiss him…