There was a huge impact that was left behind within me, somewhere, like the foreign scent of a stranger in a crowd. The only thing I was glad about was, the scent had already become foreign to my senses. If you ask me if her name was still taboo to me, I can't deny the truth that she made some difference in the way of my living. But I was sure, the scare did not hurt anymore.
I was picking some cartons of fruit juices, I was particular about the taste I needed. It was pomegranate I looked for but there was none. The one Anand had was 'whatever I picked'. It had been about six months since I started living under Anand's care. I tried my best not to burden him. Although I told him that I was fine by myself, he insisted I stayed with him and he always wrapped up his work earlier than usual just to make sure I was not alone for a long time.
There were some days when even he couldn't help but work longer. It was one of those days. I finally grabbed the last carton they had in the flavour I wanted and took mango for Anand randomly. There was only one part-timer in the shop who was organising the stock on the shelves. And the cashier's spot was empty. When I entered the shop, I did not notice it. I searched around to call someone. I heard quick steps behind me and "Excuse me, lemme ring those up!", she was still working there.
"How was the day?"
"I ditched the last hour to fill in the other part-timer.", her hands moved faster than when I saw her the first time. She was a quick learner.
I just nodded as I received my goods. I saw her eyes fixed on my face. 'What?', I did not use words.
"You did not ask me why?"
"Do I have to? You must have your reasons, don't you?"
Her expressions were quick but were strong enough to convey her emotions. She turned her head and took a deep breath before she looked at me again to smile. There she hid her scars. When she moved her hands to hand me things, her full sleeve hid the dark scars and the pain concealed under her smile were revealed.
I grabbed her hand, she whined in pain, "What are these?", I folded her sleeves a bit high and shivers ran throughout my body. She was hurt so badly. It was impossible for her to even move her hand but she worked her ass off.
She removed my hands off her, "Nothing.", she muttered under her breath. It was not because she was shy, it was because of the pain she was enduring which she did not voice out shut her completely off.
"We are going to the hospital.", I walked to the other part-timer and said, "Risha is sick. She's leaving now."
"Ashmit!", and I stopped everything, even the racing thoughts. She talked to the other part-timer. That person was kind enough to help her leave at once.
We were walking, it was more like I was following her though. She walked faster. When we reached a calm neighbourhood, she stopped and faced me as if she was mustering up with all her courage to say whatever she was saying, "I don't even know you well!". Her voice trembled as she was speaking.
"No! Please don't look at me with those kind eyes!"
"Look, you need to get to a hospital, right now!"
She sniffled while wiping her whole face with her palm. Then she took a step towards me and stared right into my eyes. "Maybe it is because I am weak today, I wanna cry so badly…", she was already tearing up, "in front of you…"
"Hey! Are you in a trouble?", I stretched my hand out to pat on her shoulder so carefully, not to overstep. I wondered if I could help her.
"Will you help?", she was not pleading, she asked me, "Are you sure you will not run away?"
I opened the door for the first time in six months. I knew the house was dirty. But I couldn't take her to Anand's place. "Wait here!"
I rushed in and dusted off the sofa and the living room. To make sure she was not just sitting on the dirt and it flew off with a puff, I tried sitting on the sofa before calling her in. She was still in a daze from all the sobbing earlier.
I wanted to offer her some drink but I had nothing in the house and all I could give was the juice I bought for me and Anand. I took out both the flavours and let her choose one. She opted out with the pomegranate and I just went with the mango. It took a lot of time for her to finally speak.
"Thanks!"
"Are you okay?"
She nodded and said, "Although it is embarrassing, I feel better now."
"There is nothing embarrassing. I am even worse when I cry."
She smiled a bit and looked relaxed, "Do you not live here?", she looked around the house.
"Ah… as for now, no!", I did not want to dig up her pain but still, "Risha! I know you are avoiding hospitals. But you still need to get treated."
"It gets better if I give it a hot pack massage. It is nothing.", she sounded as if she was used to it.
"Answer me honestly now, did someone hit you?", my suspicion raised when she was astonished when I put forward this question.
How dare someone hurt her! It infuriated me and saddened her being exposed. "How bad are you hurt, Risha?"
Maybe my anger scared her, "It's my dad! Please make a huge fuss about it.", she was pleading now. Her dad?
"Does being a dad give him a privilege to hit his daughter? Are you making any sense, Risha?", I wanted to give her a piece of my mind and tell her how precious she was to go through such a hell.
"He used to be a good person, Ashmit! Please, if you wanna help, don't make a huge fuss."