Malaking ngiti ang isinalubong sa akin ng isang salesman nang pumasok ako sa isang camera shop. Nakabuntot pa rin sa akin si Damon, nakapamulsa with a deadpanned expression. Dalawang oras na ako nag-iikot sa malapit na mall, katabi ng building kung saan kami nag-dinner. Hindi ko pa siya pinapansin simula nang tumapak ako sa lugar na ito.
"Hello, which one's your bestseller?" I inquired as my eyes roamed the displayed products of a certain brand. Matagal ko na planong bumili ng camera para i-record sana ang mga adventures ko. I'll be using this gadget once I arrive at Andelmo Islands.
"Depende po, ma'am kung saan niyo gagamitin."
"hmm... A vlogging camera. I'll be taking a vacation overseas kasi so..." Nagkibit-balikat ako at ngumiti nang kaunti.
The salesman nodded and pointed at a simple black model. "Meron po kami nito, ma'am. It's our newest model in the market at perfect din po ito for vlogging with your... boyfriend." Tumingin siya sa likuran ko.
Ramdam ko ang pamumula ng pisngi ko dahil sa sinabi niya. I turned to look at Damon who was busy typing something in his phone. Again, people entering the store were turning their heads at him! Kulang na lang mabali na ang mga leeg nila at ang iba pa nga ay pasimpleng naglalabas ng phone para kuhanan siya ng litrato. It somehow pissed me off!
"H-he's not my b-boyfriend..." I fiddled my thumbs when I felt him stand beside me.
"Ay! Sorry po. Akala ko mag-jowa kayo. Bagay po kasi kayo, eh. Kapatid niyo?"
Umiling agad ako. "Hindi rin... Actually—"
"Nililigawan ko siya." Damon interrupted. From the corner of my eyes, I could feel him watching me. Hindi ko alam kung bakit nahihiya ako. Hindi lang naman siya ang nanliligaw sa akin but I can't even look at him straight in the eye for more than five seconds!
"Ayiiiiieee, si ma'am oh, kinikilig~" Pang-aasar nung salesman. Ngumuso ako nang marinig kong tumawa ang katabi ko. Am I that obvious already?! Atsaka, trabaho ng salesman na ito ang magbenta, hindi mang-intriga sa love life ng iba!
Ipinaliwanag na nung lalaki ang specs at design nung nasabing camera. Tinesting ko ito at nagustuhan ko naman ang quality. Habang abala ang mga empleyado roon sa pagbabalot ng binili ko, ilalabas ko na sana ang card ko mula sa aking wallet. Nalaglag ang panga ko nang si Damon na mismo ang nagbayad sa cashier.
Excusez-moi?!
"You didn't have to do that. I have my own money! " I tried to sound offended but it seemed like I was a whiny little bitch instead. Kinuha ko agad ang paper bag at umalis na sa lugar na iyon para iwan siya. Why am I so petty? I'm not myself today and it's so unladylike!
Mabilis ang paglakad ko palabas ng mall. Gabing-gabi na at sumasakit na rin ang paa ko kakalakad. Tatawid na sana ako para pumunta sa isang bridge park na may mauupuan nang may humablot sa braso ko. Isang mabilis na sasakyan ang bumusina nang lumagpas ito sa harapan ko. Hindi ko namalayan yung traffic light!
"Damn it, woman. Please be careful." Damon groaned. Agad ko siyang tinulak palayo nang maramdaman ko ang lapit ng katawan namin. Kumunot ang noo niya sa ginawa ko at maging ako ay nagulat. What the hell is wrong with me?!
Tumakbo agad ako nang mag-green ang pedestrian signal. May mini concert pala doon sa park kaya maraming tao ngayon.
"Excuse me, sorry..." I immersed myself with the crowd, hoping he'd lose sight of me. Buti na lang at may matatangkad na mga tao sa bahaging pinuntahan ko kaya siniksik ko ang sarili ko roon. Luminga-linga ako at nakita ko siya sa malayo na tumitingin kung saan-saan. Bumuntong-hininga ako nang umalis siya kaya napagpasiyahan kong doon na muna ako pansamantala habang pinapabagal ang tibok ng puso ko.
"Ang susunod kong kakantahin ay para sa mga taong hindi honest sa feelings nila...gaya ko." Napuno ng hiyawan at kantyawan ng magkakaibigan ang lugar nang magsalita ang singer. I watched as she strummed her guitar at natahimik ang mga manonood.
"I was kinda hesitant to tell you
Should I let you know
I was never really like this before
Need I say more
Or maybe I'm confused when you are near me
I don't know what to do or I should be
There's only one thing in my mind
That's you and me"
Kinagat ko ang pang-ibabang labi ko sa inis. Bakit may pag-atake?!
Umalis na ako doon dahil naiinis ako sa kinakanta niya. Ang ganda na sana ng boses, eh. Panira lang yung lyrics.
Nang may mahanap akong bench ay agad akong umupo roon. Nakaramdam ako ng ginhawa dahil makakapagpahinga na rin ako sa wakas sa dami ng nangyari ngayong araw. Wala akong magawa kaya nilabas ko yung camera at nagsimula akong kumuha ng mga litrato sa gitna ng kasiyahan.
I smiled as I looked at my shots. Indeed, candid pictures are the best... you are caught in the moment and there's nothing else but pure, unfiltered emotions in it.
Napatuwid ako sa pagkakaupo nang may isang coat na bumalot sa akin. From that distinct scent coming from it, I already knew who it was. Nilingon ko siya at kita ko sa mukha niya ang pagod nang tumabi siya sa akin. I suddenly feel guilty. If only I did not allow my emotions to bring out the worst of me...
"I'm a little bit of crazy
I'm a little bit of a fool
I'm a little bit of lonely
I'm a little bit of all
Oh, I need a cure
Just a little bit of you
And I will fall..."
"A-ang cheesy nung kanta, no?" I giggled to break the ice. He shifted in his seat, with his whole body now facing me.
"Are you calm now?"
I nodded and looked away while playing with the buttons of the camera. "I-I'm sorry for what happened earlier...and uh, thanks for the cam."
He sighed. "I'm not the only one you should be apologizing to, though."
"I know... I d-don't even know why I acted that way. Huwag kang mag-alala, babalik ulit ako doon bukas para mag-sorry."
Tumango siya. "Pwede naman kitang samahan..." Napalunok ako nang magtama ulit ang mga tingin namin. I watched as his eyes slowly drifted to my lips and he licked his.
"Damon..." I quivered when he accidentally touched my hand as he tried to move closer. Too close! It's the intensity when our skin touches that really gets me. "Are you really sure about courting me? I mean, kita mo naman kung paano ako umasta kanina. I can't be easily tamed and it's tiring to deal with me."
Since when was I a self-deprecating person? The last time I remember, I swore I'd die before I am able to swallow my enormous pride!
He hummed in a low tone and raised his brow. "What are you talking about? I wouldn't chase the girl I liked for years if I'd get tired easily..."
Nanlaki ang mga mata ko. Ah. So hindi lang pala ako?
Ah. May iba pa pala bago ako.
Biglang nanikip ang dibdib ko. Bakit parang ang bigat? Was he ghosted that's why he's on to me now? If he chased a girl for years, that's well... really surprising. Wala talaga sa histura niya ang nanliligaw. Surely, that girl wasted her chance in life.
"Still...I was really unladylike and I get mad easily. Aren't you turned off already?"
Ngumisi siya nang nakakaloko. "Why should I be turned off? I actually find you hot when you're mad."
Napasinghap ako sa hindi inaasahang sagot kaya paulit-ulit kong pinalo ang braso niya. "Siraulo! I'm serious kaya." Pero hindi ko napigilan ang sumisilay na ngiti sa aking labi. Ugh!
Bigla niyang sinalo ang kamay ko at pinisil-pisil ito kaya natigilan ako. We locked each other's gazes again. "I'm serious about this too and don't even think of ways to turn me off, woman. No one can make me change my mind, not even you." He then pressed his lips against the back of my hand, which tickled me a bit. "I've stalled around for too long, Adora. It's my turn now..."
Amidst the event, I couldn't hear anything else but my loud heartbeat as I stared into his dreamy eyes, like we were in our own world... like nothing else around us mattered.
This is dangerous.
I really think I'm falling... It's a scary feeling, like something deep within me is being ignited. Also, I'm unaccustomed to being treated with such ardor!
"T-too long? W-we've only known each other for a-almost a year..."
"We?" He repeated and shook his head in disbelief. "You seriously did not read all the documents I gave you. I wonder if I should consider giving you lessons... in private?"