"Haaaah. Here I thought it was a good chance to take advantage of you, but you decided to go and spout some cheesy lines instead. Fine. If you're that against it, we'll act as a fake couple during our business trip if that makes you feel better. Either way, it's in your best interest to do so."
"Then… what was that 'something big' you mentioned before?"
"That? Sorry, only my real significant other can be privy to that information. No fakes allowed."
"What? I still kissed you like you asked, you can't just give me nothing for that!"
"No."
"Why not?"
"Kiss me again and maybe I'll reconsider."
I leaned forward and kissed her on the lips briefly before I pulled away.
"There, now what was it?"
"Sorry, my memory is a bit foggy. I think another kiss might make me remember better."
"Are you just trying to scam me?"
With half-lidded eyes and a crooked grin on her face, she said, "Of course not. I'm 100% serious. A long passionate kiss may really jog my memory."
We'd long arrived outside my apartment. To a third party observer's eyes, we'd merely been quietly flirting back and forth like this the entire time. I felt terribly embarrassed by the curious judgmental gazes from the residents who occasionally passed us by. I wasn't entirely certain whether this was just Val's twisted way to ease my tension and get my mind off of things.
Despite the uncertainty in my heart, I closed the distance again and shut my eyes when our lips joined together. I instinctively positioned my arms under her arms and placed my hands on her curvaceous waist. In response, she passed her arms through the gaps between my arms and waist. She wrapped her arms around my back and our bodies drew much closer together.
I felt my heart stop for a moment when her slippery tongue came in contact with mine. Earlier was just a quick peck on the lips. It was almost as if a jolt of electric current propagated through every pore of my body directly into my spine all at once. Her soft moist tongue, warm, like an invasive creature, forcefully wrapped around mine in a fashion reminiscent of a snake who'd discovered its prey. Her saliva was sweet to the point I thought I'd drown in it. Her lips were succulent and I couldn't avoid nibbling on them occasionally. Her breaths were strangely steady despite our sudden passionate tryst.
When I finally thought it was long enough, I tried to pull away, but she moved forward and continued like she wasn't satisfied. It was only after several minutes passed that she finally let me catch my breath.
"Hah. Hah. Hah. That should be... enough, right?"
"Was it? I'm not too sure it was enough though..."
…
I was dead tired. I truly didn't understand what her definition of a passionate kiss entailed. I definitely had no way to know. How the hell would I ever expect she'd keep repeating the same line over and over again? It was hell. Was she a monster? Our definitions of a passionate kiss were certainly misaligned on separate dimensional planes. I never thought for a second it meant a full-on make-out session.
At some point, she'd forced us into my unit. We struggled back and forth until we reached my bed where she mounted on top of me as she continued her assault. It was only after an hour when I reminded her of our original objective that she finally stopped. If she didn't stop there, it was uncertain just how far we would have gone.
I still wasn't ready to raise that death flag just yet. A kiss was one thing, but any further was a can of worms I wasn't prepared to open up.
"Mr. Genovese, it's really quite a shame we have to get this annoying presentation finished."
"Can you please stop looking like you're dissatisfied with something? Shouldn't I be the one who's dissatisfied? You still haven't told me what I wanted to know."
"Hmm. My memory's still a bit fuzzy though. Maybe something a bit more stimulating than a kiss would help jog it. Perhaps something rock solid meant to really penetrate to my core. Something like that would surely help me with these problematic vague memories of mine."
"Absolutely not. You're really testing the limits of my patience."
"Relax, it's just a joke this time."
I scrutinized her closely, I was extremely skeptical whether that was the truth.
"If you direct such a fiery intense gaze at me, you might inadvertently flip my switch again you know."
I immediately diverted my attention away toward my laptop and got back to work on the presentation. If that happened again, we definitely wouldn't finish in time before our flight. I was nervous when I thought about it, not because I would be together with Val on the plane, but because I was unsure whether the freaky shit would follow me onto the plane. What if the plane crashed for mysterious unknown causes and we were left stranded on a deserted island? Or what if it was hijacked by a criminal syndicate, bombed by terrorists, or even struck by some sort of nine colored divine heavenly lightning?
Naturally, I tried to think of all the worst-case scenarios when mid-flight to confuse the god of foreshadowing. Surely that bastard would feel conflicted with all these crazy ideas tossed out in his face. By the time he made up his mind on what he would choose, I would have landed safely at the destination airport. It's always a struggle when you have the threat of foreshadowing looming over your neck constantly like this.
#TheForeshadowingGrindIsReal
For some reason, I like to think of random stupidly long hashtags like that to calm myself down at times. I really don't though. I can't be bothered to take social media seriously. This nonsense is all just for the sake of distracting myself.
"Mr. Genovese, are you thinking about pointless crap instead of work right now?"
"Of course not. I'm diligently slaving away for the sake of this presentation. Anyway, are you going to tell me what I want to know?"
"Haaah. Fine. I get it. My three sizes are-"
"Please get to the point."
"You're really no fun sometimes. Well... simply put, Mr. Genovese, a contract was put out on the dark web for your head."
@#$%^&*()!
Her words were equivalent to a bucket of cold water dumped on my head without any prior warning.
"What the hell do you mean by that!" I'm a freaking normal person, what the hell do I have a bounty of my head for! Yeah, let's stick with the 'I'm still perfectly normal and not a lunatic myself yet' gig. Haha. Denial seems to be a trend with me lately so I might as well stick with it to the end, right?
"There's no deeper meaning behind my words. It's exactly as I've stated. Someone wants you dead. I chanced upon it while digging up dirt on a few companies I had my eyes on. The bounty for your head is a rather attractive amount, presently standing at $2,000,000." I nearly coughed up blood and fainted when I heard the staggering amount.