It's around early afternoon when Kyouya wakes to someone crying loudly outside the window. He huffs and rolls over in Tsuna's bed, having walked over in the morning and then passed out again after eating breakfast from Nana.
He frowns when Tsuna's crying doesn't stop and staggers to his feet, eventually managing to sleepily wobble over to the window. He stands on his toes and pokes his head out to find Tsuna in the small front yard, the other boy sitting on the grass, covered in orange flames and sobbing as a tiny chihuahua barks at him in little squeaks.
Kyouya sighs heavily.
He's about to head back to sleep when two strangers emerge from the front door below, one a wrinkly human and one a blond, already gaping at the fire around Tsuna that slowly flickers and dies away.
Kyouya had seen them briefly when he walked in this morning but payed them no mind. The blond looks strong, but his personality is a bit air-headed. The wrinkled human is not a threat because Kyouya is not allowed to hit him, and therefore the man becomes a non-entity in Kyouya's mind.
The dog darts away when the adults near and the blond gently stands Tsuna up again, trying to calm him down by laughing it off and showing that it's not a big deal. Tsuna does not respond well to being laughed at and cries even louder. The old one steps forward and the blond looks confused, then worried, but backs away from Tsuna.
The frail but steady old man lights an orange fire on his finger. Kyouya leans further out of the window in delight at finding yet another orange, but then the man reaches for Tsuna's forehead. Tsuna's crying dies down, and instead of the hysterical fright at being attacked by a scrap of a puppy, true fear of the unknown starts to cloud his eyes.
Kyouya frowns down at his orange and the two men, swiftly climbing onto the sill before launching himself from the window.
Iemitsu sees a small dark blur spiralling viciously through the air straight towards him and he lurches forward, shoving the Vongola Don out of the way and holding out his pickaxe like a shield to block the hit.
Kyouya unfurls with a snap at the last moment but the weapon gets in the way. Kyouya's left foot lands on the pickaxe handle and he crouches down, folding that leg until he was kneeling on the blond's collar bone. He grabs the short hair with both hands and swings his right leg around until he's sitting on the man's shoulders.
Kyouya throws himself backwards and the momentum he's built up all the way from his jump now takes hold, forcing Iemitsu into a backflip. The man throws the pickaxe away, unwilling to take the chance that the little boy won't accidentally hurt himself, but that time costs him.
Iemitsu's face smashes into the grass of the front yard and the rest of his body follows soon after. Kyouya frowns down at the fallen herbivore, still straddling the back of the man's neck and gripping the short hair.
Kyouya gets to his feet and strides towards his pet. He throws a stunned Tsuna over his shoulder and makes for his own home. He stops by the old one, who's staring down at Kyouya with wide eyes.
"Don't touch my pets, herbivore," Kyouya warns. "I won't hold back, even if you are wrinkly." He then strides away.
.
About ten minutes later, the two men find themselves seated in the living room, Iemitsu still trying to scrub dirt off his cheeks.
Timoteo frowns. "I need to go back to Italy, Iemitsu," he admits. "We both do. But I'll send someone to look after the situation."
Iemitsu nods slowly, still concerned about his son awakening his flames too early, not to mention the insane child who apparently has the strength of an adult hippopotamus.
The Don smiles. "It'll be alright. I know how worried fathers can get -I have four kids of my own after all- but this only looks bigger than it really is."
It's honestly a good thing this came up because Xanxus does need something to distract him – he's been getting restless lately.
.
"What?" Xanxus deadpans.
"Just take it as a holiday," Timoteo offers up. "You can even take your Varia with you. All you have to do is watch a child, make a few observations, and come back home. Two days, maximum."
"What."
The Ninth sighs. "It's kind of difficult to have a conversation if you only say one word."
"What the fuck."
.
Kyouya has all of the nightlights. They're practically throwing themselves at him. He gapes up at the teenagers who loom over Kyouya and a terrified Tsuna, a visible rainbow of killing intent surrounding the teenagers.
"Trash," Xanxus greets in the nicest tone he can, which is still about two steps above murderous.
"Herbivores," Kyouya greets back, eyes wide and a gleeful smile on his face. "Would you like to see my fighting pit?"
Squalo frowns and looks to the others. "Okay, so apparently I'm not very good with Japanese."
"No, you're fine, he did actually say the words 'fighting pit'," Lussuria answers in Italian. "Could be like a… cultural thing?"
"It's a Hibari thing," Mammon deadpans and then shrugs at their curious looks. "You don't want to know what happened."
"Kind of do," Belphegor admits with Levi nodding along in the background.
Kyouya doesn't bother trying to decipher the foreign language, just walks forward. Tsuna whimpers in fright but clings and gets dragged along for the ride. Kyouya grabs Xanxus' hand and starts pulling him away from Tsuna's front door and over to Kyouya's house.
...
Omake – Fighting Pit
Reborn lets out an impressed whistle, peering down. "This brings back memories, huh Colonnello?" Reborn throws a glance over his shoulder when there's no reply but the soldier is gone. The hitman looks around the room. "Nello?"
A blond head peeks around the doorway. "I think I'll stay over here." Colonnello says nervously. "You know, in case of assassins sneaking up on us."
"Assassins," Reborn echoes at a deadpan.
"I'm just trying to keep you safe, baby Born," Colonnello says earnestly.