Chapter 197 - let's go

[Amber]

Amber was awake at 5 AM with a skillet on the stove and a spatula in one hand. She blinked, rubbing her eyes, desperately trying to get rid of the sleep that clung to them and refused to go. It was too early to be awake, with the sun still

And Amber had said it before, and she would say it again. She hated it when JieMi was sad. There was a rustle of cloth and then a soft gasp that resounded from before her. She glanced up, startled by the blur of movement, shocked to see JieMi standing before her.

As usual, her soulmate was in a state of undress. His body was nothing like the sweetness of his pretty face, all hard and thick, of supple muscle and long slender limbs. He was staring at her with round eyes, the kind that should be on a puppy or a rabbit and not on a man. A towel looped around his neck to soak up the dripping water from his freshly showered curls, and sweat pants that he shouldn't be wearing, especially with how they seemed to stick to his flaccid cock.

"Hey," Amber decided to say. Her attempts to start the conversation, her attempts to remind herself to look up and away from his big dick. Fuck. She had plenty of other penises to think of, why was her mind still so adamant about remembering how this one looked like? She mentally slapped herself. Get your head in the game!

"Why are you always awake at this hour?" JieMi yelped, trembling as he took a huge step back, gripping onto his towel for his dear life as if it would protect him. His nose twitched as his eyes flickered down to the food she had made and then back to her. And she smiled.

"Wanted to ask you what you thought about the bath bomb," Amber replied smoothly.

"I-It was good, I enjoyed it," he replied, inching backwards as he shuffled his feet, looking sheepish. "T-thank you."

"No problem, so sit down. You owe me one."

"H-huh?" He blinked, pretty eyes so wide that she could see each black, trembling pupil.

"I made you breakfast." She pointed to the table, tapping her fingers on it. "If you don't eat it, I'll have to eat it by myself. Alone. At 5 AM." She tapped her lips, humming low in her throat. "That sucks." She pulled the chair and sat down, picking up her fork, stabbing it into a piece of bacon and chewing it aggressively as she stared at him straight in the eye. Her way of showing dominance.

JieMi blinked rapidly, nibbling on his lips as his eyes darted from the food and back to her. His lips were twitching, his pupils trembling. He was strangely adorable like this, panicking and floundering about and she stifled a giggled. He seemed to cave under her heavy stare, and Amber watched with rapt satisfaction as he gingerly sat down, taking a fork.

"Thank you for the meal," he said softly and took a bite.

It felt good when his eyes widened just a little more and he began to chew rapidly, clearly hungry from exercise. Or maybe shovelling his face was a tactic he used to not talk to her. But Amber didn't care, her heart was pleased that he was eating something at the very least.

JieMi had lost a ton of weight since she'd first met him—weight that he shouldn't have to lose. His cheeks gaunt and his body slimmer than what she would have liked. Her eyes roamed his face. There were dark eyebags under his bloodshot eyes and his face was pallid and a little sunken from stress. Nothing a good facial couldn't fix, but it was more evidence of his insomnia, more evidence of an underlying health problem.

He looked like shit.

Amber watched him eat, nibbling on her food, letting him stew in his silence. She knew he was thinking, his mind working through his questions. There was panic in his eyes as they roamed her face, searching for a way to speak. He looked as if he wanted to talk but didn't know how to and she carefully caught his gaze with her own, holding him there. The pressure of her eyes finally pushed him to talk.

"Are you okay?" his voice was soft, breathy and hush in the silence, flighty.

"Never been better," she answered quickly, carefully. "And I'm steadily getting better. Don't have to stick with the guys 24/7." She tapped her wrist. "It's the only reason I can make you breakfast now." JieMi licked his lips, swallowing tightly as he played with what remained of his food with his fork and breaking apart pieces of his salad.

"They don't want you around me." He decided to say and she snorted her expression grim.

"They think you'll hurt me."

JieMi flinched at her words, his expression falling and twisting. He looked so sad then that Amber's heart quivered. She'd promised to herself that her heart wouldn't melt for him again, but it did at the sight of his crestfallen face; his shoulders hunched and his eyes forlorn. Those eyes were lost in a storm, a single toy boat out at sea. And she couldn't help it, she really couldn't. Not with how sad he looked.

And it was then when Amber decided to be nice.

"Don't worry, you can't hurt me." She found herself saying, her attempts to distract him. His eyes drifted up to hers, confused and lost. His brows knotted together. "I won't let you." She dropped her utensils, lacing her fingers together. "So you don't have to worry about my pain."

His eyes widened at her words, his lips parting as they trembled.

"Worry about your own."

His eyes were a confusing mix of bitterness and pain that vanished the moment he caught her looking but it was there in those dark eyes. He was quiet at her words, silent and unable to speak, but she knew that the silence was not his dismissal of her words. He was torturing himself in his head, unsure of what to say, his body trembling as he thought of the million ways that he could answer her. But they weren't close, not enough for him to spill the words on the tip of his tongue.

"Want to go out for coffee?" She asked. She couldn't help it, not with how broken he seemed to be. Not with how his eyes screamed that he was drowning. Not with the need for an apology stinking in the air, and the words caught in his throat.

"I—I have to get to s-someone's place in 40 minutes."

"That's plenty of time. Come on, let's go."