"What have I done to be hurt when I only love someone?"
FIFTH'S / ROCHEDAN JAVINENDO'S POV
Myriana and Karson attacked us earlier. That was a close call, but we went away with it. I'm with my pair and because her nth sense is touch, she felt someone's presence. She can also sense that someone was firing a gun at us without the need for close contact of touch. She just needs to touch the ground, tree trunk, or grass to detect an enemy movement or involvement. We keep on walking slowly. I don't have a problem with her, but I hope she's comfortable being with me. I keep thinking about Rochevel. I wonder how are she and her partner doing? I touch the marking on my nape while worrying about my little sister. We have the same markings as the letter R. I hope they're okay.
Our parents have given us the name Rochedan Javinendo and my twin is Rochevel Javinendo. We are close since we were kids. Our relatives and friends are fond of us twins of the opposite gender. We have been considered a blessing to our family because we are the first generation to have a twin in our lineage. I'm a protective brother because Rochevel is my only sibling. We have a simple life and I've got nothing to ask for. Our parents love us so much. We are not affluent, so we go to a public school. My twin's school and I are different because my school is far from our house, but she can't afford long trips. As for me, I'm in varsity school so I can't give up my sports career in that school. Everything is fine until our dearest grandmother died. She holds dearly to us. Sometimes when our parents are busy, she is our second mother. When our grandmother died, Rochevel has changed her behavior. A few months after, we found out that our father have cancer with a critical stage that he inherited from our grandmother that died. We could not accept that our dearest father is ill. Everything will be okay—that was our first thought but when father's illness worsened, he confessed to our mother about his sins. He has been with another woman which caused a quarrel between our faces apart from money. At first, we cannot accept him, but we are also human beings who have sinned. After that incident, I noticed Rochevel again. If boys will approach, she stays away from them. She also told me not to hurt and play with women regardless of courting or befriending one. I thought she is traumatized by our parents' affairs. She has lost her trust in men. I also thought I could hurt a woman because I am the son of my father, but it was the other way around... I was the one who was hurt.
I liked someone in grade 9. Rochevel was very happy for me. I also introduced her to my family because I was serious about her. You may call it puppy love that I may not understand what it was at that young age but I'm sure that she's my first love. I loved her truly with pure intentions. We'd been together for almost a year when she betrayed me. I saw her cellphone with texts from another man. He was flirting with her, and she entertains him. I slapped her unintentionally. She cried and left me. Before I parted with her, I questioned her about what else I was missing. I want to know what her reason was why she did that to me. I treated her right and full of love. I can't understand where I went wrong. Her answer was because I am a good person and had a clean heart. She only thought of me as her older brother. She lacks the love from his father. She is still an only child that needs the love of a man. She doesn't think of me as that kind of love. Not the love of a boyfriend but of an older brother. I gave myself too much to someone who can't love me in return. Why am I experiencing this? I just loved someone truthfully but why am I the one who's enduring all this paint? Is there something wrong when you love someone? You are the one who loves, yet you are also the one who will be hurt badly.
I tried to forget about that and focused my love on my education, career, and family. But when I recovered from my past relationship then we suffered again from something else. Father's illness got worse, so we needed to get immediate medical treatment. I hope... I hope if we just get rich, we won't have problems with finances. If we could just ask for a miracle, my father would be healed. If I could just turn back time, grandmother would be still alive. And I would like to correct something about my romantic affair.
"I love them so much to the extent that I want to kill them"
AEIZEN'S / ZEKIAH MIAJE'S POV
Fifth or known as Rochedan and I now face Third and Rochedan's twin, Fourth. I keep on forgetting their real names. I guess I'm bad at names, or they're not important to me that's why I don't need to memorize them? That must be it. Third and I are the only two who are willing to kill each other because the two are blood-related. I don't know if Rochedan will fight her or what.
"I think we should start," Third spoke first then he adjusted his eyeglasses.
"'Can't we just go ahead with this, please?" Fourth pleaded.
This is not called a fight if there is no one to kill. I'm eager to kill with my katana. I am exhilarated to feel how hard or soft a person's skin, flesh, and fat are. I am getting fired up to see that there is a viscous, warm, and reddish liquid flowing into my glowing weapon. I am getting anxious to hear screams and cries.
"Rochevel, brother is just here, okay?" Rochedan told her crying twin. Ah, yes Rochevel is the name of that feeble girl.
What else are these two doing?
"This battle will go into nothing if none of us will attack first," Third must be initiating an attack. I like his cockiness and straightforward way of setting things up. At least he's not a coward like my partner.
Rochedan protects her feeble sister too much. That girl infuriates me just watching her wail all the time. She doesn't deserve to be in battle 10 alive and weeping. But what irritates me the most is when she gets comforted by anyone. What I don't like at all... is someone who's a pussy! They love each other so much that they don't want to hurt each other. Me? I'm not like that. If I love someone so much because I love him or her so much... I want to kill that person.
Zekiah Miaje. I am the youngest and I have two younger brothers, an older sister, and an older brother who died. I have parents who don't care about us. I'm used to it. My father, the dumbest of all idiots, was narrow-minded and fond of showing anger. If he'll sermon us, it'll be a whole night and we are not allowed to sleep because he threatens to kill us if we do. My parents are always fighting over money. My father loves to dwell in the past. He didn't want to forget anything of the issues from years ago. His age has left his brain which remains immature in a body of an old man that doesn't evolve as a good human being. His physical body has already aged contradicting his traditional beliefs that still linger in the past. Worst of all, in addition to hurting our siblings physically, he also hurt us psychologically and emotionally. He cursed us that we would not prosper in life, that we would suffer, that our dreams would not come true. It would have been okay if it came from a stranger, but it came from our father's mouth. I bestow a hatred on him. I must have been cursed to be his daughter.
And here is my stupid mother, she still doesn't want to leave him. She is a religious maniac who worships a demon husband. She seeks peace and harmony by letting herself be abused. Despite this violence, she loves her husband more than her children, her flesh and blood. Such immorality must not be tolerated and the one who does is worse than the perpetrator. Maybe she's waiting for our father to kill us before she'll see the light against the darkness. What can I say, a masochist and a sadist are indeed a perfect match made from hell and I am the byproduct of those two demons? If other child doesn't want their parents to separate, it's a different story for me.
Even my life outside my family has been cursed. My best friend left me. We have known each other for a few months, and I really considered her a real friend. I am a silent person, but I became more open when she became my friend. But little by little I felt that her treatment of me was getting colder until I saw that she was with her other friends. I heard that she was disgusted with me being her boring companion. I avoided her and forgot I had a friend. Since then, I have returned to isolating myself. I'm not making friends because I know they'll leave me too, it's better to be alone than to have fake friends.
One night while thinking about my depressing life, I looked at my older sister and older brother sleeping peacefully in their respective rooms after our parents quarreled. I pulled out a knife behind me and was going to stab my older brother. This is to finally stop our suffering. I am the only one who is capable of doing this because I have the deepest wrath among us. This is the only solution, so I volunteer to do it in the fastest way possible. My older sister will be next, and I'll be the last. I want to end my siblings' lives because I love them so much to the extent that I want to kill them. But then… what an ill-fated real world is. A ray of light has shone. With this game, I'll turn time to make a new world where my parents do not exist. And when they do not exist, of course, I and my siblings will be also non-existent.
We're still standing here and feeling who will be the first to attack. Third cocked and aimed his pistol at Fifth's head. Now, this is what I want to see. I'm getting thrilled just watching Third's murderous intent.
Fourth shuddered to hold her katana. Tch, what a beautiful katana wielded by a wimp. We even have the same weapon. This kind of weapon is not in the likes of her. We might have the same weapon, but the wielders are totally different with no trace of similarity. I want to finish this. I'll just kill her then. My right hand clenched holding my katana. I'm just waiting for the timing. Third nodded and I left Fifth staring. I don't know him anymore. He was being too kind and cowardly. They really are siblings. It's okay for me to kill Fourth so that she and his brother can be together.
Why am I so getting pumped on the twins? Am I jealous of them? Am I jealous that they love and care for each other?
Rochedan turned away and started an attack. His arrow is supposed to hit Third he managed to avoid it.
"Then this is war" Third fired at us one after another. I immediately ran and quickly dodged his bullets. I don't have a care for my partner when he dies, the important thing is, I will live. As Third focused on Rochedan, I ran closer to Fourth who was just stupefied. This is my chance.
"Ahhh!" she shouted. Third heard her shriek so he shot in my direction.
Lousy rat!
I was not hit in the vital area, but I was hit in the left leg. Fourth and I was startled by an approaching arrow at Third. The two of them are fighting one-on-one. I will put an end to this wimp.
"Hyaaa!"
I aimed my katana at Fourth and to my surprise, she also aimed her katana, so I didn't hit her head. My, my this one will fight. We both lowered our weapons. There was no reaction visible on my face, but she seems to burst into crying again. I did not plan to pity her. I rushed at her again, but she backed away and protected herself with the weapon. I continued to attack until I hit her on her left shoulder. Yeah!
"Z-Zekiah, enough of it," I don't hear anything! "Zekiah, please!" He continued to groan after Third gave him a good shot on his arms and legs. Third doesn't intend to hit his vital spots yet. That's good torture.
Why? Why do I see myself in him? That I was crying in front of my father, but he was just mercilessly hurting my siblings and mother?
I continued attacking Fourth. "Ugh" I felt pain when someone punched my stomach.
I turned around and it was Rochedan. W-What is he doing? Isn't he on my side? Ah, yes. He did it to protect his sister. Lousy traitor.
I sat down and held my stomach. From the punch that he made, I had contact with him physically. Using my nth sense of touch, that told me that he's exhausted and in critical condition.
"Don't ever hurt my twin," he declared while glaring at me. He is panting and obviously out of strength after fighting Third. But this battle is not yet over.
I stood up steadily to hopefully kill Rochedan first. Change of plans. Now you're testing me!
"Brother!" Fourth shouted.
Now that he has weakened, thanks to Third. Without any doubts, I swayed my katana and stabbed my neck. My stab was so deep that it went through his nape. This is what I'm talking about when I'll kill someone, it'll be mercilessly. You dare to interrupt my work? That serves you right.
Rochedan coughs and lies down. "R-Rochevel, when you win the game, bring grandma back to life and then heal our father, okay?" Fourth nodded and sobbed.
I need to get out of here.
"Not so fast, Miss Miaje, Zekiah," I turned around and saw that Third pointed his pistol. How much bullet does he even have? He adjusted his edged eyeglasses again.
I have no choice but to do my rotten way. I ran towards Fourth and aimed my katana with fresh blood at her.
"All right, kill me with all you've got but I'll kill this girl first! If you want her alive, I'll run away from here with her and only release her alive if you stay there!" I threatened him.
He stopped talking and did nothing. "Raise your hands and throw away your pistol! Turn around and don't leave your post, not for 2 minutes!" I threatened him which he did. Yes, that's right, Mister Third or whatever your real name is. Save yourself and let me handle this girl away from you because she only slows you down.
We both walked in a secluded part of the forest while she was in front of me, and I focused on threatening her with my katana. She even cried because she is still mourning her brother's death and that she was afraid of me. When I got to where I wanted to go, I pressed the sharp tip of the katana a little. My fingertip bleeds. She is so easy to stab in the back using this beautiful katana.
"Turn around or I'll kill you," I warned her, so he turned around and closed her eyes.
I have no rope or anything with me so I can't tie her. Better tie her up with fear. I walked not far away and hid for a while and rested in a tree. I took a deep breath while squeezing my left leg which was bleeding. I reflected first and went back over all that had happened.
"Hahaha!" I laughed, a sinister laugh. I can't believe I really did it! What a superb feeling this is!
I looked at Fourth. "Go! Make a run from your nightmare! 'Cuz this will be the last time you'll freely breathe," I said to her. She hesitated to run and trembles. I pushed her. She ran so fast while weeping.
My feelings are mixed now but because I've been through a lot and I'm used to it, my facial expression is always blank. But for a moment I smiled. I even released her and let her run to cry away. For a long time, I made myself a fool of letting her loose. This will be the last and only time because I'll kill you soon. I can't have all the fun in one day, after all.
"Animals and monsters kill each other. I caught him red-handed, he's one of them."
SECOND'S / HEAVIEN'S POV
My nth sense is taste. At first, I was saddened why to taste that I couldn't really use but what else can I do. This is what was given to me which I should be thankful for. I stick my tongue out as if I'm licking the air. When bitter, it will be big trouble. When sweet, it is safe. And there are many other flavors. I thought our nth senses didn't match our weapons. I used to think that I should have sight as my nth sense because of archery. So maybe that's for the two partners to work together. First must help me because he has sight.
"Oh, look what we have here," A girl's voice.
First and I looked around to see who was speaking.
"It's Sectwen and Ninezen," and he pointed to where the two were.
They are approaching us. We are facing them. There's a wrapped cloth on Nadine's right shoulder. I stuck out my tongue for a moment and tasted the air... b-bitter indeed. This is bad. First saw my facial expression and know what it meant. He holds my hand.
"Holding hands really, huh? Haha!" What is going on with Nadine? She doesn't seem to be the former Nadine I met.
I tried to get rid of First's grip on my hand, but he tightened it even more. I didn't do anything because somehow my nervousness is relieved every time, I feel First's warmth.
"By the way, didn't you do this to me?" Nadine is referring to her injured right shoulder. So that's the casualty I've caused her. "The rest is from far away so it's probably you, Heavien. The weapon can't be lent, so it's you." She must be finding out that it was us who attacked them and she's right. I still feel guilty.
"What are you doing here?" Trake asked. His aura also seemed different.
"What are you two doing here?" First dodged and returned the question. He has really changed since the fight started.
"Okay, I'll answer your question. We're looking for a competitor and we found you." I saw that Trake is holding a sword, the same as First's.
"We're also looking for a contender, then you showed up yourself." First's answer was toneless.
"What a coincidence! Then why don't we fight against each other?" Nadine has challenged us.
Maybe she wants me to repay her for what I did to her. I understand. Forgive me, Nadine.
Trake and First have already advanced their respective weapons. First warned to be ready for this fight. He will fight Trake, and I will fight Nadine. He didn't want me to fight in the first place but that wasn't possible, I have to fight. Nervously, I prepared the bow and arrow that is now focused on Nadine's neck, and I plan to penetrate it that and also hit her nape—our target area.
"Attack!" Nadine shouted.
I was just about to release the arrow when Nadine threw a grenade and it exploded in front of me. She ran several meters from me. I sat down on the ground because I inhaled the chemical in the air. I coughed and my eyes are itchy. First was a bit far from Nadine and I so they weren't hit a bit by the explosion, and they continued to fight. Good thing, it was a mild explosion. It seems that she has a variety of grenades, ranging from mild to fatal. I can feel the pain in my left leg that had been bruised by the grenade. I took a deep breath first when someone took my right arm and supported me... Trake?
"Cy, are you okay? Y-Your forehead is bleeding!" I scratched my forehead and there was blood.
Why is he here? He still seemed to be gasping when he supported me. I thought he was fighting First. I was surprised when someone grabbed Trake's collar.
"What do you think you're doing? You thinking of ditching and harming her? Don't-you-even-dare."
"No!" I shouted and he punched Trake causing him to fall.
First immediately approached me and helped me to stand up.
"You're bleeding. You really are a defiant one. I already told you not to fight." He tore the ends of his long sleeves and wrapped them around my forehead and leg.
"I'm fine. Go on with Trake. I'll handle Nadine"
"But-"
"You have nothing to worry about, First," then I smiled at him.
I ran so that he would not stop me. I just noticed while they were fighting, both are exchanging deep stares and they seem to be talking. Maybe that's a man's talk. I had the courage to run even though my leg was still aching and looked for Nadine where I last saw her.
"Over here, yohoo!" Nadine suddenly appeared behind a tree while waving so I alerted myself. "I'm sure those two are fighting for one dense and naïve person."
I ignored what she said and aimed an arrow at her.
"Whoa, slow down, lady. I'm not gonna hurt you. Actually, I already hurt you and you already hurt me, isn't that fair?"
I composed myself. "Yes, we're fair so I have no regrets."
"What's done is done." She went near me, so I focused more.
"Hya!"
I was shocked when she kicked the bow I was holding. I got my arm is in discomfort. Because of that, I finally let go of the bow and arrow to touch my sore right arm. While doing something, I received a kick to the stomach and a punch to the face. I lied down while writhing in pain.
"You got too confident," she smirked at me. She brushed her long light brown hair.
You are so different now Nadine. You are no longer the former Sectwen I once knew. I got up and adjusted my stand. My hair bun is messy. This has to end.
"Hya!"
I preceded her in punching. I used the techniques I remember when my brother taught me basic self-defense.
"You b*tch!"
"Whaaa!" I screamed when she pulled my hair.
We continue to fight using only our physical bodies. We refrained from using our weapons and settle it down with a woman-to-woman fight. She often tweaked me, so I got annoyed because it was not fair, so I also retaliated by tweaking her too. She beat me and so did I until my hand took the relatively sandy part of the ground and threw it in her eyes. She shouted and rubbed her eyes. Really sorry.
"Heavien!" I heard someone shout my name. I looked around and saw Myriana on the right!
She's lying down and she's holding out her hands to me. Her forehead and arm are bleeding! I got concerned about her situation. I licked my bleeding lips and accidentally tasted a mixture of bitterness and sweetness. This doesn't taste like blood but why am I tasting two tastes at the same time? I was about to run closer to her when I felt a sharp object touch the bottom of my nape.
"Shit!" It's Nadine.
She was behind me on her knees holding my arrow down. She twitched because of the electric shock. She must have forgotten that it is forbidden to touch or use other people's weapons. I rubbed my back. My clothes are torn on the back. I felt there was some liquid dripping, it was blood. I parted my hair when I felt something strange on my hair. Wriggling in pain I removed the arrow an inch deep buried in my flesh. She targeted my nape using my arrow. She has stabbed me already when the arrow electrocuted her. I suddenly remembered Myriana's condition. She needs my help! I was about to step toward them when I saw that Zekiah was behind her while lying on the ground. She lifted her glowing katana.
"Nooo!" I shouted at Zekiah.
Although I wanted to go to her, my feet were stuck in my position. Nadine didn't let me go running to her. My neck feels cold, and my hands and knees are shaking. I got on my knees and shed tears one after another. I was just stunned as I watched Zekiah leave after she killed my now lifeless friend. I feel like the world has stopped running as if everything shown to me is bad and tragic events.
"Get ready for this, b*tch!" I heard Nadine's voice. I slowly turned to her as I knelt. She is back to normal after being electrocuted by my arrow. She leaned over me and touched my neck.
"In my hands, y will die!" she said and choked me. Her eyes glazed over. "Daddy will come back if I win so I'll take you one by one, and I'll start with you!"
I was pale and in tears because she strangles me. I picked up my fallen arrows and aimed at her nape. She tightened her grip on me even more and I continued to catch my breath. I don't know why I can't fight back. I can kick her easily, so she won't strangle me, but something is hindering me. I have no longer any strength with me. I can't anymore. I can't do this.
I saw someone run closer behind Nadine. He aimed his sword at her nape and struck. I could clearly see Nadine's wide-open eyes in shock. The gruesome pain she felt when he cut her neck must have been distressing. Her blood splattered on my cheek. She is now lying on my chest— lifeless. Why does this have to happen?! Even though she was mean to me, I was also bad to her. I looked at whoever killed Nadine. He still holds the sword with blood dripping from the tip of its sharp and glowing blade. He stared at me without any reaction. I gulped at the same time as a tear dripped from my right eye. Animals and monsters kill each other. I caught him red-handed, he's one of them.