Sometimes I wonder if there is anything greater out there for me.
So far, life's been about jumping through all the hoops: pre-school, elementary school, middle school… As for this 2nd-year student of Holt High School, nothing of importance has occurred since the beginning of high school. Where were the after school hangouts? Club activities? Teenage romance? It's been a bland life so far, and I can only imagine it getting it worse from here. Once high school is over, then I'll have to look at higher education, paying for it in the duration of my entire life, then look at being an ADULT. Terrible, if not terrifying. Seriously, life seems to suck now, but it feels like it'll only get worse from here.
I'd feel less anguished about this if there weren't other people on the exact same path as me, only to receive entirely different results. Those born in affluent families are able to never grow up in life, handfed anything and everything that they could ever want. Those born beautiful receive preferential treatment wherever they go—a trait that creates a qualitative difference from an average joe like me. In middle school, anything that had to do with the words "rich" and "beautiful" seemed far away, a distant fairy tale, if not a nightmare. Then I entered Holt High School, home of the wealthy and hotbed of hunks, by a sheer miracle that they decided to bestow peasants like me. Truly, an eye-opening experience seeing very expensive cars, butlers, and crazy ornate classrooms in an everyday setting.
Despite that, life still sucks. I'm still dirt poor, but I've been given a god-sent opportunity to change the trajectory of my life. Thing is? No one wants to talk to me. Life's been a bit lonely since the start of high school, and while I'd like to blame it on the rich snobs of Holt, it's more of a problem with me. Social hierarchy dictates kids like me belong to the bottom of the caste.
At Holt, trust fund kids are a dime a dozen, and when everyone is the rich kid a little bit more or a little less isn't going to change anything for you drastically. So at the top, you've got the beauties, hunks, top scholars, and the student council (or stucco for short). Considering that the stucco is comprised solely of the school's most highly acclaimed kids in both looks and academic, I'd just call it the aristocracy of Holt and leave it at that. Then we've got the athletic clubs, followed by the regular student body—the average rich kid in a non-athletic club or go-home club—where below lays the fabled anime club and assorted weirdos. And trust me, the weirdos are weird. Not to say that the anime club isn't, but they've got an undeserved reputation as far as I've heard.
I'm below the weirdos. I didn't believe it myself until it was patiently explained by some girls back in year 1. Paraphrasing her, it's a crime to be average in Holt. Well, let me amend that: It's okay to be rich and ordinary, but not to be poor and average. People in my situation are stuck here until the end of their Holt High School days, except for a select few.
So, to put it in simple terms, it's not my fault that I have no friends!
Wait now that I think about it, there is no problem with me at all! Fuck hierarchy! Fuck society!
Like this, I quietly rationalize why I'm cleaning up the classroom by myself, while my assigned cleaning bud, Ben, was off frolicking with one of his girlfriends. The dude is a ladies' man for sure, hell, I don't think I've ever seen him outside of classrooms without a female presence. As for me… Heh, life's truly been a solo show so far. This reexamination of life brought me the motivation to finish my sweeping even earlier, my god-like skills honed by years and years of chores at the orphanage and daily sweeping after school since my start at Holt.
If anything, I could maybe look to get a job as a butler once high school is over under one of my classmates. Expert cleaner and an expert in enduring wealthy brats? What an amazing two for one deal! That'll definitely pay for college…
But I can't think like that. I need to try my best, work harder than the rest of these privileged bastards, and exceed them. Only like this can I rise to become the very best I can be. One day I'll be above these guys and show them how oppressive society is… Let's see how they like to be treated worse than the anime club!
A fearsome ambition, I know.
===
Time passed as more nonsensical thoughts, and whimsical fantasies went through my hand, as I wiped, dusted, and swept on autopilot—a spotless classroom slowly emerging from my efforts.
Some of my classmates have asked me why I do this. Am I just a pushover? Well, now that I think about it, I might be. But doing this sort of thing was Zen for me. It was a task I can do without thinking. At all. There are times when a person needs to stop worrying about their day, what they need to do, and what they are going to do. Or at least, if I had to keep thinking about life, I am sure I would be going crazy.
And you know what? Even the principal has complimented our classroom on how clean it was! Not that she knew it was from me though…
I let out a sigh, as I finished cleaning the last window. Now all that was left was to put away the tools then head out. It was already starting to get dark, but that didn't mean it was all that late out. It was around 6:00 P.M., and at this time of year, the sun sets earlier than usual.
I wasn't quite sure I would like a dark and gloomy night walk home, so I started to hurry up. I put all the rags into a bucket, carrying it in one hand, and grabbed the broom and dustpan with the other. Peak efficiency!
Just as I put away the equipment in the supply closet in the back of the classroom, I could hear the subtle sound of whispers of a conversation from the hallway. It was probably Ben, seeing how his stuff was still on his desk. The dude ditches and always left his crap everywhere…
"I still have no clue why you're hitting me!"
"Shut up! You're just playing dumb!"
As expected, I could hear Ben's voice coming from outside the door, with a girl in tow. I could even hear their bickering. Man, I should have started to hurry up earlier. Zen? Fuck that.
With a small rattle, the door swung wide open.