"Hey now, calm. No quakes happening again today." Puhak encourages, patting the gear stick in place of my leg. I stop fidgeting and look his way, my eyes gravitating towards the tips of my fingers. The way they now catch the light and the delicacy of which they've been shaped with, it's not normal for me. This glossy coating is somehow the most sensible option the shop had.
"I don't think Pops is going to recognise me at all..." I mutter, trying way too hard to stop myself from scratching and picking away at my quills. Every other time I've sat down, I've given no regard to my back other than making sure it doesn't catch. Now I keep trying to sit upright with no support. It's all decorated now and I have no idea how to keep it safe.
"No old hegge ever forgets their wedding diamond." Puhak huffs, making my blush grow as my mind wanders. How will Pops even react? Will he care at all, even? No... He put way too much effort into it beforehand when I asked him about it. I got his blessing for all of this and he'll... He'll see the efforts that came of it.
"You wouldn't understand, Puhak." I huff, looking away as so many past moments flash in my vision. I've delivered slaves to Suhurlodst, armed each and every time. I am a murderer and I have not one shred of care that I am. I've seen enough blood to fill all the pools back at the beauty shop and then more still. Those mud pools wish they had enough mud to hide the bodies.
Puhak here could never get it, no matter how many rough and tumbles he might have experienced. Nothing delivered on a teacher or parent-held-back fist could ever grasp a knife like I have. Pull the trigger like I have. I don't even need anything in this car to kill him should I make the choice to do so. All I need is one pointy quill from his very plentiful back.
Gods and goddesses above... I can do it with the quills that are no more than stubble.
That is how different me and him are. How different I am from everyone we can see on the streets right now. None of them get it. Only those in the shadows of the alleyways might ever get it. There are places far darker than the underground realm of the hwardgon. It can be found everywhere, on the highest mountains and the most open plains.
"I don't know. Think the gas is certainly alight here. Hwardling grows up real fast my way. Body ain't just to show off a fancy new digger. You ain't as alone as you think you are in the vein." Puhak says, a smile on his face as he thinks back to what is no doubts child play. I smile alongside him, silently mocking him for what he thinks he knows. Daddy beat him? Oh, I feel so bad...!
Try getting shot at from a young age. Try watching your entire family bleed out in front of you. Try shutting your heart off from the world because the jobs simply demand it of you. Try knowing what it's like to have that first taken life in your memories.
"Right up here." I point out, getting ready to exit the car. Puhak brings us to a stop, and he reaches out for me, stopping me. I turn his way, meeting his eyes as he reaffirms his grip. His gentle squeeze furrows my brow, and he shakes his head.
"See you at the party, Diamondback." he tells me, waving me off as I finally get out the car. I linger on the pavement to the house and secure my stuff in hand. I return the wave as he seemingly makes some notes of the location. He drives off, not a moment longer needed.
"Whatever." I let out, my eyes free to roll at that nickname. What even is it? He said it about the other girls before. Is it referring to all this stuff on my quills or something? Whatever, I guess.
Still...
"Quite the new look." I giggle, growing giddy as I set the box down and twirl. My old attire simply wasn't going to work with how the beauty shop did up my quills. So Mui and her friends went out for something and got me a dress. A plain, mostly white thing with bands of pale blue on my belly and at the end. Open-backed enough to show off my quills but secure enough not to slip down. Despite how slim the shoulder bands are.
Yet, for all that I am not wearing now, the pouches and stashed away bits of gear. I feel heavy. This makeup on my fur and the lipstick painting my kissy bits is not right. It's never been there before and I don't know what to do about it.
"Mmm." I let out, putting one hand on my wrist and squeezing it. I leave my stuff on the front garden for the moment and step up to the door. My fist comes up, tightened delicately so as to not bother the gloss on my nails. It knocks forward, rattling the door up.
"GO AWAY!" shouts Hrurim from inside, and I knock again. Smirking at his noises of frustration, I hear him come banging up to the door. The handle shakes and trembles, the metal panel flying open.
"Hi!" I giggle and wave, wondering how far I can take this. If they don't recognise me, that is.
"Whatever you want, heed my lips. Piss off." Hrurim warns, his teeth bared and his other arm suspiciously out of view. I cock my brow and keep my eyes up against his, knowing full well what he's tentatively touching up. Pretty sure that click I just heard ain't the door lock, either!
"Do me a massive favour, Wagon Boy, and fetch my things, mmm?" I ask of him, stepping up to the door and moving a little inside. He backs up and blinks. He blinks again and looks me over. A lack of words to be heard anywhere. The cogs continue to turn and my smirk gets all the water it needs to grow.
"H-Heiya...!?" he finally chokes on.
"Hehe. Shhhh." I tell, smacking him aside so I can get into the house properly.
"Uh... Ivahstar is upstairs..." Hrurim struggles to answer and I give him a little finger wave. A sequence all the girls around Mui seem to delight in. I don't quite get it, but the act is the act.
"Wonderful!" I chirp, vanishing from the human's sight with all the energy in the world. I land on the next step and it all goes away. My arm shoots out, grabbing the handrail. I stop. My chest hurts and it's suddenly hard to breathe.
I choke on nothing for a second and get my act back together. An odd pain in my back. I blink back whatever this heat in my eyes is and I go up the next step. I flinch and recoil, the following step more so a banging stomp.
"Wh-What the...?" I let out, reaching the top of the death trap the stairs have randomly become. My legs continue to tremble and I look around at all the closed doors. I breathe a long sigh of relief and get going, an ache in my knees.
By instinct or lucky guess, I find myself at the door I know Pops is beyond. I shake my head and blink, putting my paw around the handle. It goes down and I step in, finding the old man resting with his back to me. I try to grab his attention, but all that comes out is a tight sound of nothing.
"..." I linger on, not able to find any words to fill my mouth. I look away and around and back down to my feet. All prettied and painted with that shiny gloss, like my fingernails are. My toes wiggle, the paws of my feet too tight and in need of a stretch.
Pops' nose sniffs, and then it sniffs again. A noise comes out of his throat and I've no idea how to process it. It has an aggressive hint to it...? Does he not like my choice of perfume...? Does he-
"Hi... Pops!" I force out, bringing my thoughts to a crashing halt. I shiver and shake uncontrollably, watching the muscle rich hitman rise to his feet. His shoulders square up, far broader looking than I am used to, and my eyes lock up. I catch but a moment of him twisting around and I hear him stop.
My imagination gets the better of me, and I hear his feet scratch along the floor. He's right in front of me. A shudder is in his breath... A shudder not like anything I have ever heard before.
"Heiya... You... You look beautiful, my precious little Princess." he tells me, coming as close as he can to hold me tight. My eyes explode into the open, tears all around them.
"A-Am I...?" I let out, hoping to hear him say it again. He likes it. He likes it! Pops likes it!
"Yes, you are. My special Princess." he laughs, holding his lips against my cheek and pressing them deeply. I giggle without any sense of control, my face red with my blood and not because I am wounded. For once, I am happy there is all this blood about my face. Not disgusted or worried, no want for medical care or a washcloth. I'm simply happy.
I pathetically return the hug, shaking about with him as he rocks my body. His grip loosens, and he steps back, my fingers in his paws. I meet his face and smile as painfully wide as I can. He can't stop chuckling and I'm pretty sure the glitter near his eyes isn't from my makeup.
"You really have turned out so well, Princess." he tells me, bringing my teeth out into the open as my emotions make me the pleasant kind of bashful.
"Hihiheeeee!" I let out, free of his grip as he takes his index finger for a spin. I do just that and spin around a couple of times, letting my dress catch on the still indoor air. My front comes back in line with his and he grips my shoulder, twisting me the other way. Pops keeps his hands to myself and I shuffle towards a luckily nearby mirror.
I align myself against it, pointing out what I have had done. From the polished and curated tips of my quills to the ribbons and precious metal chains now going through them. He's already seen the light load of makeup I have on my face. I'm not too worried about him focusing on it. I want him to see what I had done back here!
I was in the best non-edible sweet shop in the world and I had my fill. The people of this town certainly made sure I could pay by weight, too. I can't stop giggling and Pops takes a step closer. He touches one thing and I shiver to a sudden stop.
"Is... Is it fine I have this on...?" I ask, knowing what it is he's touching. Mom used to wear a necklace which had a shape like that on it. I don't know whatever became of it after she died. I never even learned the shape's name, I just saw it and demanded it on impulse back at the shop...
Pops' silence burns and ruins my heart, but his touch heals all my anxiety.
"I'm glad you chose it," he whispers, turning me back around to put me into another hug.
"Yeah... Yeah..." I say, not sure what else to say as I return the hug with all that I can.
"Keep your head clear, Princess. Enjoy your time at this party." Pops tells me, kissing me on the head and ending the hug. I nod and smile, watching him leave the room.
"How's the work coming along, by the way?" I ask, not too sure how far along they are. I've not been the most acutely aware of them as of late. They know that... They know.
"Cage is all set, and the bug is gagged. Double checking contacts at this point, mostly. Time between answer and sending and all that," he explains and I nod, looking away to the mirror as a blush takes over my face again.
"Right." I say, borderline whispering.
"Stay away from Hrurim, Princess." Pops chuckles and I huff into a giggle, looking at his shadow as he vanishes. My attention snaps back to the mirror and I dance before it, watching the dress move about. So very different from my usual overalls and in all the right ways!