It had been a little quiet since Vadei asked me to stay, she had not spoken up once the door closed. Nor did I really feel like prodding it from her or getting it out in general. I was quite fine to just sit here for the moment. But, when she showed signs of wanting to talk, I looked on over at her, intent on listening.
"Earlier... When... Um... Earlier you said I had an advantage over you... Why did you say that?" Vadei asked me as she looked on over at me with a sad expression. Why she had this expression could have been for any number of reasons. And I was confident it was likely related to her dead parent. Her mood has been consistently foul since that day, after all.
"Because I know you're not fond of me. So I brought it up with the idea it would put you at ease." I tell her with a slight shrug. Having long since lost my care for her anger and rage towards me. It was just sort of expected at this point. How quiet she went when I said this, however, was not expected.
And I was left a little baffled at how quiet she was now, her expression said a lot. It did, however, not say anything I thought it would. She was regretful and uneasy and more than just her face made that clear. So I sort of leaned closer, just in case I was about to mishear what she was about to say.
"That's not true... I don't hate you at all..." she admitted as her chest started to convulse as she also started crying. I was a little shocked by this reaction and behaviour, but, I still tried to do something. So I scooted a little closer and put my claw on her shoulder. Only for her to suddenly launch at my lap before she continued sobbing.
"Sending different messengers to me, you are!" I said lightheartedly, hoping the lighter tone would calm her. But, she was far too serious at the moment for jokes or teasing.
"It's true! I don't... You just... Always seem to remind me of the bad things..." she told me as she shivered against me.
"I remind a lot of people about bad things." I tell her with a sigh, looking briefly at my left claw as it was the first sign of problems. This was the limb after all that turned into that of a bug's first. It was the arm I tried to ignore all throughout my stay with Rose at her flower.
"For what it is worth Nin... I'm sorry... First it was you being from Tob-" she started to say before she cut it short as my body tensed up, "Then everything with Dad happened... I just don't know what to do..."
"Sometimes, a lot of us don't know what to do. I certainly didn't when I first got here. I most certainly didn't when all this happened." I say to her as I thought about my arrival to this land as well as my transformation. Both were stressful events that still affect me to this day in a borderline brutal fashion. One changed my understanding of the world while another changed the perspective I was looked at by most.
"I know, but... I just started taking it all out on you when you had done nothing..." Vadei said with a whimper as she moved her head along my upper leg. It was almost like she was nuzzling me.
"It was probably for the best, I mean, look at how I've turned out. I put this damn thing back on of all things." I said to her with a loud, boisterous, and, most importantly, forced laugh. And when I was done forcing out this false joy, I sighed out my misery.
"Yeah, I've noticed." Vadei comments as she moves one of her dry hands near it. Watching as she plays with it for a bit before she moves off of me. She doesn't get out of her bed, but she does sit up in it. She sits up and just stares at the other end of the room.
"So why did you want me to stay in here anyway? You have your mum to talk to now." I ask Vadei after turning to look at the far end as well. I also looked at her face every now and then, hoping to see a smile. Yet, there was never a smile for me to see whenever I looked over. It was always the same expression.
"She wouldn't get most of it... But, you would as you were there for quite a bit of it..." she mutters as her hands open up before her.
"Then why not take the time to detail it out to her?" I asked the tailed woman.
"You can only fill her in on so much... It would just be easier to speak to you about most of it seen as Vapooliar and Dandy are not here." Vadei answers with a sigh.
"Dandy is the aelenvari with the sore throat, isn't she?" I jokingly asked in an effort to get a smile. But, still, none came and I was left wondering about my crush. How could Larishazza muster the willpower to exert a smile from someone? I was struggling here with someone I was familiar with!
"She has some bad neck and throat injuries, yeah." Vadei says as she slowly nods in confirmation. And, even though I had not done much with her since before my first death. I still liked to know that she was okay.
"Do you happen to remember that race we had back at the aelenvari flower?" I suddenly brought up.
"The one where your other half nearly killed me?" Vadei bluntly put it as her gaze shifted over to a crack in the wall. And, interestingly enough, the coat of fur on her back began to stick up.
"Yeah, but, as we know, I saved you. But, that isn't what I wanted to talk about, really. I wanted to talk about why I helped Dandy as you call her." I say, getting her attention and confusion in equal measure.
"She did mention a human had helped her get away from Rose when we were still travelling to Suhurlodst."
"That would have been me, and do you know why I did it? Purely to spite your ungrateful backside." I try to laugh out to the confused oxfuine.
"I... I don't follow."
"You spoke about how what I did wasn't saving someone because I was just sorting out my own mistakes. And, to get back to something more recent. I want to prove you wrong once again, I want to save you like how I was once saved."
"Prove me wrong...?"
"The most recent reason you said you hated me. Your dad... I want to save you from whatever it is you are going through, I don't want to see my friend like this. Especially when I know what it is like."
"And how do you know what it is like?" Vadei asked rather stupidly before I took her hand.
But, I did not want to chastise someone who was so tender at the moment, "Trust me, Vadei. If you want my help, you just need to ask. It doesn't even have to be a polite request, you can demand if you want." I say to her before I slowly stand up. It was about time she got back to resting, surely?
"W-W-Where're you going!?" she asked me with a distraught tone that made me freeze.
"To leave you to get some well-earned rest." I answer as I kneel before her with as soft an expression I could.
"Can... Can you stay with me until I can get back to sleep? I don't want to sleep on my own anymore..." she said at first with whimpers before she just let it all out into more tears. And, I would smile as I took her squeezed-up hands into my claws.
"Sure, that's fine. Do you want me to read you a bedtime story too?" I said to her with sincerity before I undercut it with a little teasing. But, she actually started to nod in agreement. She did, in fact, want to hear a story...
"Yes, please..." she mumbled quietly as she slowly moved under her quilt again while keeping her top up. Then, when I had moved around to her head, she dropped it down on me after planting her pillow on my lap. And I understood very well that I was sort of stuck here now. If the goal was to get her to sleep, then, I would not be getting out when it was met.
"Alright, so, what kind of story do you want to hear? I'll admit, I don't actually have many stories of my own making. And, I'm not too sure that you'd want to hear about the tales of how the gods did their thing way back when." I explain to her before she starts fiddling with my bracelet.
"Why not tell me about how the gods actually are?" she requests before snuggling into her altered bed. One of her large, open ears even turned so it was more in line with my mouth. At first, I prodded it a little and played with it. But, same as with all prior teasing, I got nothing from her beyond annoyed reactions.
"Well, I guess I can do that. So, let us start with the day I died. You know pretty much all the details for that. We were going to leave, you, me, Vapooliar, Dandy and Seed-"
"Seed? Oh, right... Her son..." Vadei interrupted before she went quiet again.
"But, yeah, it was us five, ready to go, but, there was a catch I wasn't too comfortable with."
"You had to bribe them with... Sex... Didn't you?" Vadei inquired before I sighed and nodded.
"I guess you can call it that, but, unlucky for everyone involved. Incredibly so for me, the interrupted transformation I was going through had finally finished. I became an osibindah freak and since then I was always one. Well, not while I was a soul, at least, I still had my old body then."
"The one you had before you died?"
"Technically, yes, it was one I had before I died. But, I'm talking about my old body, the one I had before Heiya shot me with that gun of hers for the first time." I told Vadei as my tone became more mumbly and annoyed towards the end.
"So what was Undwote like?"
"About what you'd expect, really. Friendly god, very kind. But, I saw a side of him I did not expect. Because his dad, the Equilibrium, likes to have his children have the body of children. With a few notable exceptions."
"The oldest being in history likes to see his children look like children...?"
"He does, to the annoyance of Undwote, for example, who spent all his time as a child. So I only ever really saw him like that."
"Were the Pack of Seven pups, then?" Vadei asked me as she started to move up. But, I would ease her back down as that defeated the point of going back to sleep.
"No, they stayed the same. There were some who were a lot smaller than the others. And, they'd only ever go to you if you said their full name as well. That was something Undwote mentioned."
"Did you only really meet Undwote?"
"No, I easily met a dozen over the week I was there on that ship. Oh, yeah, they all lived on this ship that clung on to the walls of this tunnel with magic lightning or something." I suddenly added on as I remembered the ship... Vightorhian, that was its name. And I was slightly surprised to remember it given how it was probably only mentioned once. Maybe a god was reading my thoughts right now and helped me...?
"Did any of them stand out to you? Like... I know it might be a silly question but..." Vadei asked before she mumbled herself into an embarrassed state. It was almost as if she was expecting me to insult her over it. Well, I wasn't, because, well, some actually did stand out!
"Probably the usual ones, Thurnmourer, Waionr and the like. Motrtha also kept my attention for quite a bit too. Oh, and then there was Ihtuntar purely because, well, didn't expect to see him."
"The God of the Sun is alive...?" Vadei rightfully asked in confusion as she moved to reach for something. But, as she needed to be getting to sleep, I reached over her and got it instead. Turns out, it was a book on the gods, which I only knew because it was sort of written in the wind language. And, I say sort of because it also seemed to be fused with another language I could not read.
Vadei, however, seemed to read it just fine, "Yeah, I know, books and that say otherwise. But, no, Ihtuntar is alive. He's just... Odd."
"How so?"
"He was always in the form of a nervous child when I saw him. And, going by what the gods told me, he's been like that since the, you know. Moon problem."
"I'm a bit confused as to how he is alive..." Vadei mumbled before closing the book and setting it aside. I guess she only wanted it just to reaffirm what she knew about the Betrayed Artist.
"Don't think much on it, he's a god. He works completely different to us. Speaking of that, though, they are also quite similar in a lot of ways. Particularly at dinner."
"You tasted their cooking?" Vadei nearly drooled out as her barren stomach exploded with rumbles.
"I did, and I miss it every day. Rose did too, only a single dish, however."
"How did she try it...?" Vadei asked as she began to get annoyed at what I just told her.
"Motrtha gave me a goodbye present, the best-tasting desert I will ever have in my life! One of many, as you are aware." I say as I move my wrist about. I even drooled slightly at the memory of that blackberry tart. Gods I missed Motrtha's cooking...
"Did you get along with Motrtha? Or was she just being herself?"
"Believe it or not, I think she had a thing for me. Got a few kisses on the lips from her." I sighed out dreamily as I tried to remember the quality of her mouth and touch. But, it made me a little miserable too, because there was no way for me to remember such quality well. Even if it stuck to the forefront of my mind so much every now and then...
"Now you're just lying." Vadei says to me which led to me looking down at her with an offended expression.
"You weren't there, you don't get to call me a liar."
"I do when you start saying rubbish like that..." Vadei mumbles as she begins to properly fall asleep.
"Sure you do. Still want me to carry on, Sleepyhead?" I then asked her as she opened her jaw wide to yawn.
"No, I'm... Fine..." she answers as she goes to sleep once again. But, with her head on my lap, I was left unable to do anything.
"Now what do I do!?" I mouthed in frustration at the fact I couldn't just leave now. She was sleeping right on my lap! Moving would just wake her up again! But, some options did exist.
And I took one of them up nearly instantly, and her head soon felt it. The steady, rhythmic stroking of her reddish-brown hair that started over again when I found a knot. If she was awake, I might have forced my way through the knots. But a sleeping Vadei would be pissed if I did that.
But, I had something to do at the very least...