"Nin! Nin!? Nin, where are you!?" one of the girls called out as I hid away in the dark. My rear was firmly placed on the edge of a garden that was seeing next to no use this late at night. In my hand, that photo we took and in my eyes... Tears...
I did not want this reminder, I was going to leave them and now I had a reminder. A reminder I just did not want to get rid of for some reason. And even if it was risky, I had my mask and hat off just so I could cry openly. It wasn't fair, I just wanted to go home and then this thing had to exist...
"Nin? Is that you?" Einervaene asked me as the sound of her heels became louder. Yet, oddly enough, the sound was not so sharp. I did not turn around to look at her, but when she entered my eyes, I was surprised. She was not in her usual clothes.
Instead, it was just a simple white dress that also went blue as you went up the dress. It also had dark blue rims and flower designs also went across it. And instead of her high-heels, she had something closer to sandals. Still high-heeled and all that, but it was a lot subtler and more open so her feet were exposed.
"What's wrong?" she asked me as she sat down close to me. Something I refused to answer as I put the photo away into my hat.
"Nothing." I told her as I went over to the edge of the garden. Staring out into the dark land below before she came over. Her own eyes looked up at the night sky as she moved closer. Most of her weight clearly being applied to me as she stood there.
"I won't push it then, Nin. But, the light show is about to happen, put a smile on just for that then?" she asked me as she turned to face me. Her hand guided my face towards her when I refused to move.
"We'll... We'll see..." I told her with frequent tremors and stops. And then, it just sort of became quiet. It was just us two standing around in the dark until distinct sounds were heard. All of a sudden, light.
Loud bangs and colourful lights lit up the sky.
"It's started if you could not figure it out." Einervaene teased with a grin as her face took on a green shade. Something with green light in it had just exploded right in front of us. And then purple, orange, brown, yellow, blue, pink and then white. The white one was particularly entrancing as it just lit us up.
"Beautiful..." I let slip while looking in Einervaene's direction. Even if I was looking at a distant sight.
"You're not too bad looking yourself." she said back to me with a smile and rather subtle blush for her. And while she was smiling at me, I frowned. I knew what was about to happen. And, given what I have learned, it is time I gave her an answer.
"Listen, Einervaene." I said to her while straightening out my form. Moving slightly closer to her in the process. But, it would seem she misinterpreted it and had closed her eyes. Lips open slightly as it became clear she was expecting the unlikely...
"Oh, sorry." she told me with a darker blush once she realised I wasn't going to kiss her. But to her, it must have been something more akin to she was just too hasty. Not that I was not interested...
"As I was saying, Einervaene, I believe there is something important you have been trying to tell me?" I said to her as I raised my left arm. Taking off the bracelet I got from Motrtha and letting it hit the ground at that moment. And it hurt deeply to see Einervaene's expression change the way it did.
She started off with that sweet smile and an eager love waiting to be let out. But it suddenly disappeared and she became confused before she became visibly frustrated. Her mouth moved about as if it wanted to say something but nothing came out. It was clear she was coping by thinking she was just embarrassed.
"Nin, I... Nin... I..." she let out before she went quiet and put some distance between us. Her eyes went down to the bracelet I dropped.
"You want to say something along the lines of asking me out, don't you? How you have these feelings you just want to admit?" I said in a rather flat tone which I probably should not have used.
She slowly nodded before she shook her head, "No... That's not it... Why can't I say it!?" she exclaimed loudly in frustration. That anger soon gave way to tears as she bashed at her head.
"Einervaene!" I said firmly as I put a stop to that. And at that moment I regretted what I had done. She was breaking down crying while showing nothing but confusion and loss on her face.
"Why can't I say it...?" she said once more as she looked up at my face. Her body came closer as she tried to reignite it. Like a match that kept going out.
"Because you never did feel it." I told her cruelly as I took a step away. Gesturing once more at the bracelet.
"You mean to tell me..." she said as she caught on to what the implication was. That this bracelet was interfering with her emotions for some reason.
"Yes, you never felt that way, Einervaene. This bracelet just twisted and messed with what was already there." I told her with a sigh before I began to walk away. Content only with the idea of leaving that bracelet behind. In spite of how valuable it was at the end of it all...
But, her hand reached out and stopped me, her eyes wide so she could aide her plea, "I don't care! Whatever that bracelet did! I don't care! I was truly happy when you had that on... I don't care if I am not wholly sincere to you with it on! I just want to feel like I have someone!" she cried out to me as she tried to tug me back to her.
Yet one firm move from me was enough to free the arm from her grip, "I won't, Einervaene. I won't willingly force you to have a better opinion of me. I won't force something-"
"Nin! I am telling you it is fine, I want you to do it! I am fine with it! So please," she told me before she tried to put it back on my wrist, "put it on!"
"No..." I told her as I shoved her away. Watching as she stumbled and fell down to the floor before leaving her there. Making sure to grab my stuff before I waited by a corner. Unable to tear myself away from the sound of her crying.
And while I tormented myself by staying near the woman I broke the heart of. I put my mask back on and then my hat too. I hid it all behind this mask. Every bit of anger and despair.
I hid it all before I then finally worked up the strength to walk away from the garden.