How many dreams did I get based on war? I miscount. I then feel a presence around me. It made me wake up screaming. "You gotta toughen up kid." Kenshin says in my head, "You used to be good with all these memories in your head. Better get yourself straight before Hijikata or Furukizu loses it again."
It made me think that I needed to make a dream journal. It would be handy but it wasn't something I would want to make. Dreaming of death in a daily basis isn't something would go for. But then again...who would? I ended up waking up at an old rickety shack. It looked like I was still in Tondo. I opened the door greeted with a bright light. It turned out to be my current group. Everybody was salvaging through the junk shop and see for anything useful. Rebecca then notices me come out and everyone started to follow. "You doing alright, kid?" Mr. Williams asked. He passes me a bottle of water and nudges me to drink. I took a good sip out of that bottle and looked at the clear blue sky. It looked like it was mid morning. "How long was I out?" I asked. "About a day I guess." He told me. My footing was still bad and my stomach growled. Mr. Williams then looks at the time. And goes to the shed. "We might as well get a bite to eat. We'll be needing to do a bit of work before we head out." Mr. Williams told us.
The five of us then ate in the small shack. None of us didn't say as much. There was the usual wails and gunshots but other than that, we actually ate normally. There wasn't a threat to worry about at all at the moment, only the meals that were in front of us. It was the usual MRE with bottled water. Honestly, this was as close to normal as it was gonna get. But it was quiet and there was tension. Gram then cleared his throat and asked for some water. Tyrell poured him a glass, only for it to spill after an explosive. We look at the horizon to see a mushroom cloud at the distance. Gram gives a big sigh. "We might as well get set. The sooner we get whatever we need, the better." Gram told us.
We decided to get ready and continued to back to work. Everybody was set with rubber gloves to pick up the garbage. But as I was about to stand up, I started to totter to the side. Rebecca then grabbed me before I could even trip. "You doing alright?" She asked. A mixture of memories of my past lives started to kick in, most of them mixed in with the world war. "I'm still kinda getting flashbacks." I told them. "Looks like Rin is still relapsing." Gram said.
"By relapsing you mean…?" Rebecca asked out if curiosity.
"His state of mind is still deteriorating. He's still able to move but Rin isn't really capable of doing much."
"So what does this have to do with Rin's memories?" Mr. Williams asked.
"For most people with past lives, they go under great stress just to recover their memories. Often times, the most brutal ones take a toll on the individual's psyche and functions." Gram explained.
"So I'm undergoing some kind of PTSD phase?" I asked.
"Something like that. We call it the Panic Phase; where the recollection of past memories stream to the mind like an endless movie reel." Gram explains to me, "Even if your body is dormant, your mind is much awake, performing twice as much."
"But would that mean that Rin hasn't been resting at all?" Mr. Williams asked.
"Yeah… I would say that his mind has been binge watching on past memories to the point that his sleep is equal to being awake." Gram tells us, "At any point, the guy isn't even in any shape to even fight."
That was news for me. My hypersomnia during the recollection of my dreams turned out to be a version of insomnia. It did make sense but I'm just wondering how did it make sense. "Did you see this happen before?" Mr. Williams asked Gram.
"There were actually a lot of them. Oak Cinders had worked with a lot of guilds at the past and they pretty much people having the same result." Gram told them.
"What was the result?"
"Mostly with people with past lives of people dying badly or those who were part of events that shook lives end up experiencing this phenomenon."
"Like wars and genocide?"
"I was thinking more about rape and murder…but that works too."
Gram then looks around the rubble and finds a mop. He breaks the head and gives it to me as a walking staff. "For now we just let the guy easy as much as we can." He tells them, "Rin can still fight but the synchronization will take a toll on him mentally."
"How long is he gonna be like this?" Tyrell asked.
"As long as he has memories, Rin would have episodes like this for awhile." Gram answered.
"Then is there a way to prevent this from happening while out here?" Mr. Williams asked.
"The panic phase activates when a certain trigger such as a word or event happens...I guess that would be fine as long as he isn't exposed to any kinda stimulus for awhile." Gram told us.
"I guess that means I won't be doing anything today, right?" I asked.
"Maybe be on guard duty at the moment. We don't know what's inside here." Gram insists, "For all we know there will be a few dire rats in the area."
The five of us then started to look around the junkyard and eventually stumbled at a good place to start. One by one he moves the junk along to the side. Gram then brings out a few things. There was a metal bed spring, a few slabs of scrap metal, and bits of metal pipe. "Which do you think here is considered useful?" He asked. We didn't know what to say. Gram may have seen something that the rest of us didn't. But soon Tyrell noticed something. "All of them look good. All that matters is the quality." Tyrell answered.
We didn't actually know what was going on. Eventually Gram gives us a little lesson about Cletus' quest system on gathering missions. Gathering request are given by many merchant guilds. Merchant guilds take part of the supply and demand of the resources. They are the guilds that help sell products to the capital. What that does that have to do with the gathering missions? The Merchant guilds use this as a way to gain materials and resell them to the public. They sort them into high to low quality goods to be sold with extra profit. It gives convenience and safety for people who do not wanna risk their lives outside the walls to get some cash.
Knowing that enlightened us a little but it meant a lot more for Mr. Williams. He scratches his beard rather humbled about the information. "So that's why you brought Tyrell with us. It was a way to get some materials for ourselves as well." Mr. Williams put out.
"Yes. Outside your power is your will to survive but in the capital is the law of coin. I often do this as well to get some good materials for my friends to make a few good crossbow bolts." Gram said.
"Come to think of it…some of the metals are extra pricey at the markets…even some of the low quality ones." Tyrell added.
"Then wouldn't that be wrong? Overpricing materials and food?" Rebecca asked.
"It's not like we can do anything about it. Not only guilds need to pay for the mortgage of the guild buildings but they also need to pay up taxes on anything with business." Gram said.
"Such as?" Mr. Williams asked.
"Stalls at the markets, storefronts, guild association tax, putting up bills at the guild association, etc." Gram answered.
"I'm actually surprised the guilds still stay up after so many expenses." Tyrell said.
"Well the guild association take a chip out of the money you earn per bill. But not to worry, whatever reward money on the bill is what you will be getting out of it." Gram answered.
"Then how much do the guild association get?" Rebecca asked.
"Around thirty percent of the original bill." Gram replied.
"That's really a lot." Rebecca said.
"At least you guys get something. The guild association still have to organize the bills and approve the request of other guilds. Us supports still need to pay a fee if we want to put up stalls. We can sell some of our stuff at the shop but the guild we belong to still gets some of the profits for us selling them there." Tyrell commented.
"Profit wise, you make yours on prices out of the stuff you guys at the Craftsman's guilds make, Tyrell. You guys pretty much have control out of the products you make so the price comes with it." Gram assured Tyrell.
"That explains why all the pots they sell at my guild don't have the same price…" Tyrell pointed out.
"Just be careful on the prices and the demand and you'll be fine." Gram told him.
From the rubble we started to go into piles for the many bills that we signed up for. Most of our quest focused on the gathering of metals but there were other things that were into mind. There were some request orders for plastic, wood, and many others. I wasn't one to do much at all. With my frail state, I was told to rest. Mr. Williams gave me a tarp to sit on as I kept watch at all directions as the rest of the floor went to go around to salvage some materials for us to take or sell. To be fair it was rather boring just sitting there. There was nothing for me to do other than to stay put. I was about to put a glyph on a paper charm but I was stopped by a knife throw by Gram. "No magic! You're gonna need the rest for tomorrow." Gram said.
It was a scary tactic but it worked to scare me. I was kinda disappointed but it was kinda for the best. My body was kinda worn out after that many recollections of past memories. If I end up using magic then all the more stress will be done in my body. A way to put it is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline.
It was important to keep watch. Honestly it was hard to focus though due to the smell. But for all I know, some slime monster or some dire rat could just pop out of nowhere and kill the whole group. Even it was a junk shop most of it was actually a junkyard. There was a section of the location that organized the junk but it was half the quota for the order of plastic at one of the request. None of us wanted to be here but in the end we needed to do it in order to stay at Cletus. Even if we didn't want other people to die, coin was pretty much the rule here in order to survive. Everybody else was doing their own different thing. Gram was at an effort to look for some wood that still can be sold. Tyrell was cutting off the bed springs with some wire cutters. As for Mr. Williams and Rebecca they were looking in the trash looking for scrap. Mr. Williams looked for metal parts that could be useful while Rebecca kept on looking for broken plastic. Rebecca then stumbled upon a large plastic container already broken. "You think this is good?" Rebecca asked. "Break it to shards that way we can bring more." Gram told her.
Rebecca then grabbed a hatchet from her back and started hacking away. But the more she hit it, the more the axe bounced off of it. "Stupid axe!" She cursed frustrated. She kept on bashing it a little but the more it bounced off. "Your form is good but not your grip and edge alignment." I told her. "Really? Let's see you do it." She insisted. I stood up and she gave me the axe. Just by one swing the hatchet managed to stick. I then took her hand and managed Rebecca's grip. "Your hand should be firm but relaxed. You were giving a bit too much slack." I told her. I then lean behind Rebecca and guided her swing slowly. "Plus your swing should be straight when you move it. Your weapon still has an edge so move it straight." I added. I then let go of her and backed away a little. "Now you give it a go." I insisted.
Rebecca then comes into mind of what I said and tries it. She then does a few slow practice swings then tries to do the real thing. With just a swing, she was able to get an eighth of the ax head in. "With a little more practice you should get half of it burrowed in." I told her. "Thanks..." She replied. Rebecca kept on swinging and I went back on my place to keep watch. All that was left were plastic shards that were easier to fit in a rice sack. "I get metals but why plastic? What is plastic even used for in the capital?" Rebecca asked. "At gentle hand we use it to mold a variety of things such as handles, kitchenware, and spoons. As long as you got the molds for it then you got a goldmine." Tyrell said.
"Plastic is also cheap and very durable as well. Most of the smiths in my guild often use it for parts of their weapons and gear." Gram added.
"Hmmm… I never thought recycling would actually considered here." Rebecca said.
"In a crisis, once individuals decide to rebuild society, they often go at it on a standpoint where they try to find a more practical and economic method." Mr. Williams told her.
"Correct. In the end, people here just wanna live rather than to survive. It's not like we wanna live in this dark fantasy forever." Gram confirmed.
Mr. Williams continued on as he went back to salvaging. But as he pulled a metal bar off the pile, something fell between his feet. As he picked it up, It was a broken toy gun with the trigger missing. His eyes fell gloomy as it gave a memory of his own. "After seeing war in my eyes as a marine, I figured I join the UN to help people out." He said. "How was it?" Rebecca asked.
"It was good but a lot of hard work. I kept on switching jobs in being part of the medical team and the law enforcement division. Honestly there was nothing wrong with them but it really depended where I was at." Mr. Williams said.
"How did you take it, working in those conditions?" Tyrell asked.
"I got to see a lot of places but it was hard to keep up with the demand. Once I joined the UN, society after war or tragedy is hard to manage after seeing the effects. Most of the time what we faced was famine, distort or disease." He told us.
"It can't be helped. A city can't be built in a day." Gram told Mr. Williams.
"I know but I dealing something like this brings me back. Seeing something like this." Mr. Williams said.
"Like what?" I asked.
"No matter what country I gave relief to, everybody still wants to live no matter how hopeless it may be. Even now as monsters and bandits are around every corner, lots of us would just wanna head home and would wish how the world was back to what it was." Mr. Williams voiced out.
He then fixes his cap and gets a hold of his canteen. The man's eyes meet the sky as the rays beamed down on him. "I think I know the feeling of those people now." He says, "My apartment is wrecked and I have no place to go back to. It kinda makes you wonder yourself what's gonna happen now where we have no permanent place to go back to."
That answer alone made us all unsure. It was a dark reality to be reminded of that was rather vague. All of us were living our normal lives at East L.A. but now we're in the ruined slums of what remains of Tondo. Neither of us had a home to go back to since the apartment is part of the wasteland of Laputa. East L.A. was no more than a desert, Chicago became a forest, and Detroit became forest with a grassland prairie. Tondo now is one of those wastelands and vegetation cannot grow due to its heavy pollution and diseased areas. After years of being unkempt, it became a plagued area but at the same time a location where it's trash can be used to restock on resources. It really didn't matter since we no longer had a home anymore. But the feeling made me consider the depth of the situation. We were trapped in a new reality where the rule is to get out, survive, and repeat. It was rather a dark reality but one that we needed to get used to.
The sun then reaches its highest and as it was soon time to take a break. We almost reached our quota on the materials we needed to gather. What we managed to get was four bags of plastic, two bags of metal, and three banded bundles of wood. Our rations was the usual, canned goods and a bottle of water. It was silent the whole time as there was nothing to talk about. Tyrell then cleared his throat a little and looked at the sky. "I wonder what are we even gonna do once we get off this rock." He said. "I wonder that myself. I was just drinking coffee while watching the news a few weeks ago… Now I'm eating a can of pork and beans in in a junk shop with who knows what is outside." Mr. Williams said.
"I was just lucky that I was cleaning my shotgun. A goblin broke through my window and I barely managed blow its head off blank range." Rebecca said.
"Funny how the anti-gun people actually had a disadvantage even outside of the debate." Tyrell said.
"No, actually that's irony." I said.
"Which? The one thing that people scorned turned out to be the thing that saved their lives; or the people who were seen as loonies to have a gun ended up being the people who lived longer?" Rebecca asked.
"Both." I replied.
Gram then looked at us weirdly. To be honest, hearing ourselves really sounded like something out of a parody comedy. "It's weird how Terran politics are. Do you need your firearms or not in Terra?" He asked. "It's really a complicated debate...both sides have points but they keep on eating each other. It's hard." I said.
"Then on which side are you then?" The lizardman asked.
"Around the side where we just don't wanna get involved and just do our own thing." Mr. Williams answered.
"More of 'we would rather not be political and don't care' side, where we know how guns work and aren't psycho killers." Rebecca responded.
That reply made the lizardman raise an eyebrow. It looked like the topic was oblivious to him. "They do realize not all people who own weapons aren't sociopaths, right?" He put out. "Blame people who follow feelings over fact." Tyrell puts out, "I hang out with these guys most of the time and they haven't even shot anybody until now."
What he said triggered a memory. But I brushed it off. "Honestly, I grew used to the fact groups use information to fuel their own selfish causes. Like I work in the video game industry and many times some developers used video games to fuel their own forced agenda." Rebecca put out.
"Come to think of it...there was one time I was reading a book at a supermarket. Store employee calls me racist." Mr. Williams said.
"A book? Really?" Rebecca asked out of suspicion.
"Yeah, Tyrell's father knows how I like stories from the civil war and world war two. He recommended me one and the summary looked good." Mr. Williams replied.
"What was the name of the book?" Tyrell asked.
"'Twelve years a slave'." Mr. Williams answered.
The whole group became quiet. It was full of blank stares until three of us erupted with laughter. "Isn't that a memoir of a black slave? What's so racist of it?" Gram asked out of confusion. "It's not! It's just the snowflake BS and oversensitive ranting!" Rebecca laughed out loud. Us Terrans kept on cracking up while Gram was still lost for a moment. But a small smirk then formed at his face. "Reminds me of teaching before the HAPs in Aria. Back at those times we just worried on requirements and lesson plans. Now I'm here salvaging in this dump." He said.
"Same. It's been awhile since I was walking around daybreak. I was at nightshift most of the time at LAX. First airplane engine and wings, now on a forge making, pots, pans, and knives." Tyrell agreed.
"Mine was all code and research on historical events. Eventually it moved to becoming more politically correct then historical facts. I would wanna shove my foot up their ass if I hear more shit about adding about something ridiculous that shouldn't be in there." Rebecca ranted.
"What did they want?" Tyrell playfully asked.
"They wanted me to put black people in a historically accurate game about the vikings vs the English!" She blurted out loud.
"Weren't all of those guy European?" Mr. Williams asked.
"I know! Everybody there was white! Why the fuck would you put a black guy there in the first place?! That's like making John Snow black for representation when it makes zero sense at al!l" Rebecca blurted out.
Everybody just blurted out in laughter. Even Gram was laughing. "Who thought of that?!" Gram laughed. "So you know this?" Rebecca asked.
"Many of my students happen to come from Terra to learn magic. Apparently they got me into the song of Fire and Ice series. Eventually I found the source material from Terran history and found it quite interesting." He told us.
"I myself found the Battle of the Roses. Quite interesting." Mr. Williams said with a grin.
"And the story was quite interesting. You can learn a lot from the history of others." Gram added.
Something then fell out of Gram's pack. It was a photo of the lizardman in a suit in a class full of humans. It gave him grief to see it and sighed. "When I was still teaching, I was in charge of the Student Exchange program between Terra and Aria. I was in charge of taking care of the Terran sections." He remembers, "They could be a rowdy bunch but I enjoyed teaching them as they were teaching me." Tyrell then looks at his reflection in his cup of water. He looks up and looks at a beat-up car in front of him. "I actually wouldn't mind working a twenty-four hour shift either if it meant I could eat my mama's Thanksgiving Turkey again." Tyrell mumbled.
"My co-workers weren't that bad either. At least at the end of the day I could just heat up a burrito and play video games." Rebecca added.
From joy to depression, the scene changed faster than a flip of the switch. Looking at the action figure at the trash made me remember the anime I used to watch after class. My students are probably flipping out knowing that I'm here at this floating rock. Heck, I wouldn't mind some pizza and ramune right about now. All of us missed civilization. Even if it was a few kilometers away, I still missed the one place where we were before.
But soon something tumbles in front of me. It was a basketball bouncing at me. It was a group of five wild ghouls around their teens. It was there that the five of them screeched. "Run to the shack!" Mr. Williams shouted. Everybody bolted away from the scene and into the metal hut. All were calm and locked the door behind them. It was there Gram noticed something. He Taps Mr. Williams by the shoulder. "Oh my god… Where's Rin?!" Mr. Williams exclaimed.
That was right. I wasn't in there with them. I was standing up outside in the open. Something took over. It was the memory of the WWII soldier. He was in my head and I was in perfect sync in him. "I'm already tired. Just...Stop..." I mumbled as I was synchronizing with that personality. The five ran towards me; I walked straight for them in a slow pace. All the emotions from the WWII personality flowed through my body. I could feel it. His sorrow, pain, and anger. It pulsed through me like dark flame of hatred.
As soon as the five undead were in close range, I drew out my sword and swung it in amazing speeds. All five of them kneeled down and slowly all five of their heads slid off with a fountain black blood gushing a few feet away from me. Not a single drop fell onto my clothes, only thing that was wet was the blood on my katana. One still remained. One of them jumped over from one of the junk piles and I barely deflected the strike. It was a female ghoul with long sharp silver nails. They were at least five inches long per finger. Her head raised and I saw no eyes. This was another ghoul I have never faced before. She grinds her nails past the concrete wall as she slowly comes towards me. The female ghoul then charges towards me with a straight thrust. It was to fast to block so I dodged it. However she continuously tries to stab me as her thrust and slashes started to become faster. Her attack pattern, no matter how fast it is, it was quite repetitive. In the end I read the female ghoul's movements and slashed both of her arms off. The ghoul started to freak out. While distracted, I cut both her legs off and she fell in the ground in an instant.
The ghoul was down. But even if she can no longer attack, the female ghoul kept on crawling towards me. Before I can even can bring out my gun out something happened. She was mumbling something. Little by little I stared to make sense of it as what she wanted to say. I couldn't even get it myself why I understood it in the first place. It was in Filipino. She kept on saying one thing: 'I don't want to die.' Every time she kept on getting closer the same words kept on more understood. I was soon shown a flashback of the many people I have killed that said that. It felt like my brain was gonna explode. But soon it was on what the ghoul was saying dispelled it. The WWII personality started to take over again and null all the voices in my head. "She has lived long enough. End this life with care." Someone said in Japanese. In front of me was a Japanese soldier in WWII clothing. "Finish it humanly as you can." Kenshin told me. Bloody memories surged as the thought circulated in my mind. it was in a building with scarlet stained walls. Fear circulated though my nerves. Screams could be heard ringing around my ears. I then got my sword ready and stabbed the ghoul in the neck. My blade passed through her spinal cord at the neck. It was a quick, painless death. The memory stopped after that. All targets were down and I knelt on the floor as I was finally able to get calm down.
My party soon went up to me to check on my situation. But as they went up to me, the rain came and time stopped. Rain drops stood still in time and living beings frozen. In front of me stood once more Kenshin with a cold face. "You will is weak but your strength is strong." He says, "One day you will break as you will one day... your strengths will fail you. Get stronger for one day you will see tragedy of own heroism. Tragic lives live with tragic ends. Remember that!"
But there he was again… Furukizu, masked. He mumbled something. I gave a faint smile as I saw despair. "Funny that you should say that...yet I don't remember shit, huh?" I ask him, "Even if I try to change for the better...I still end up with you again? Don't I?" Time went back to normal and the my party drags me into the house. I was able to get up as my strength was able to get back up. I watched the rain drop as the it got harder. "We really need to get home." Tyrell said. The words of that past life started to haunt me again. "Right now, this continent is our home." I told him. Rebecca reacts out of disbelief. "What are you talking about?" She reacted.
"You heard me. We can't get back now. All we can do is try to live here." I replied.
"What do you mean by that?" Gram asked.
"Yeah, that sounds like crazy talk." Tyrell added.
I then gave a big sigh. My eyes directed them seriously as I made up my mind. "If we don't come to terms in the reality that we live in now then all the more we won't be able to live the next day." I tell them, "Right now we need to get stronger. If we don't find some way to get stronger then we're good as dead as the ghouls outside."
"Then what are we supposed to do?" Mr. Williams asked.
That was where I was lost. I looked around as I was trying to find a solution. I then see the corpses outside in the rain. Mainly my focus was on the female ghoul. She was far different from the ghouls that we have seen before. There my idea came into fruition. "We need to evolve." I tell them, "We're not ready with our skills to kill our hunters. It's about time we become the hunters ourselves."
We waited out the storm as it kept on pouring. Everybody was quiet. Nobody said a word. All we could do was watch till the rain stopped. The rain stopped soon and it was late afternoon. The smell of the garbage became more pungent as it mixed with the water. Much like my mind I guess...what I said sounded hypocritical. But that wasn't the only alarming thing to see.
It was the heads of the remaining ghouls. Three out of six of them were still of them were still alive and moving their mouths. I was scratching my head after seeing this for myself. "That's just creepy." Tyrell commented. Rebecca then grabs a stick and nudges them a little. "How is it even possible these things are still alive even when decapitated?" Rebecca asked. That's when out of the blue Gram grabs another pair of surgical gloves and a protective mask. "You might wanna back up a little." He told us. We did as he said as he takes out a chisel and hammer from a toolbox and hammers away. Black blood started to splash as the rotting smell from inside burst throughout the area. The sight and stench was so putrid that all of us took a corner and started puking. Even Mr. Williams, a military veteran from constant wars started to hurl out whatever was in his stomach. Gram then gets some tongs and pulls something out. He washes it in a bowl of water and there was something rather out of the ordinary. It was a dark purple crystal sphere with a dim blue light shining within its core. "What the hell is that?" Rebecca asked.
He puts it in a bag and goes to the other head. There he gives us a little lesson. "When the Lazarus curse kicks in and turns the dead into ghouls, their own biology changes as well." He explains, "Eventually the body changes from being able to release mana to absorbing the magic energy all around them."
"I thought our bodies release chi?" I asked to clarify.
"Well...you're not wrong. Our bodies release Chi little by little as we age."
"But what of the ghoul, does it mean that they have chi?"
"By the moment a living being dies, all the chi inside the body is released. As soon as that's gone then the curse would change the biology of the individual, making the body being able to control mana to absorb it."
"So like a dehumidifier?"
"Close but on a biological scale."
"Would that mean that the person is alive?"
"No. The body will only function at the parts that haven't decayed yet. Their bodies may work but their minds won't. The brain biology also changes to that much of a hungry child and work with whatever it has in the brain. In the end only the motor responses and basic survival functions alone will only function."
"Then what makes these ghouls so special?"
"Overtime the ghouls change after absorbing too much mana to the point it crystallizes in their brains, thus developing a Mana core. The same place where the seal forms once the person dies.
There Mr. Williams formed an odd look at his face. He looked rather disturbed. "So in other words… you're pulling out brain tumors…?" He asked ominously. "Yeah. Necromancy requires a lot of Mana to raise the dead. That's why they resurrect zombies and ghouls to collect Mana for them." Gram agreed in his own magic-scientific way.
"So what does that mean? We don't all use magic here." Rebecca asked.
"It basically means that Mana users don't need to collect Mana from all around them just to make a spell when conjuring it. The corpse does it for them." Gram answers us, "Think of it as magus are basically pistols with a one bullet cartridge. The ghoul acts as the extended clip and all they have to do is say the incantation and the spell just forms."
Just thinking about it reminds me of Lilith Vain's autopsy report on her ability. There we go again...that name. I recall a certain name and image. Lilith Vain...where have I heard that name before?
Eventually I thought of something else. Not long I then found myself looking at the female ghoul. It did look a hundred times different from the other ghouls that we've seen. The ghoul had long silver hair, pale ash skin, and black veins. The kicker though was her nails. They had a silver like color but they were hard as iron. "Then what about this one? Why isn't this one even moving." I asked. "Oh...she's one of the rare variants. Some ghouls actually evolve overtime and instead of the crystal tumors forming, their biology changes extremely." Gram explains to us, "We call that kind of rare variant as Wailers. They're ghouls stuck in a sense of intense rage that they claw anything that is moving from a bystander to even a tumbleweed."
Gram then looks at his toolbox and takes some pliers. "Can someone pull out her nails? They're as hard as steel and fetch out a lot of coin." Gram asked. "I'll do it." Tyrell volunteered. Most of us raised our eyebrows. It was kinda rare for him to do anything to do with gore. Yet it was even harder to believe see him pluck each nail one-by-one. "Look at you! All manly and shit." Rebecca complemented. "Like Rin said, if we wanna survive then we need to evolve ourselves. I don't wanna die here." He replied.
"Then you wouldn't mind cracking the last head here." Gram playfully suggested as he dangled the chisel and hammer in front of Tyrell.
"I think I would wanna go baby steps before jumping the bandwagon to gore town." Tyrell declined the offer.
Without any warning I take the chisel and hammer from Gram and take hold of the last head. Gram looked shocked and took my hand. "Maybe you had enough gore for one day." He said. I then flicked his hand away. And put the chisel on the temple. "Back when I was killing those things I had a vision." I tell them, "They were the same the last few weeks."
"You wanna talk about it?" Mr. Williams asked.
"I don't know… it's hard to describe. All I saw was rage, sorrow and fear. Personally I don't know how to describe it."
With a swing of the hammer, little by little flashbacks of everybody I murdered, from Nanjing, Manila, and many others. A knock from hammer to chisel meant another memory of killing a single person. People from old men and children were not safe from me. I can feel Kenshin's rage, his depression…everything. It was at the last swing that I managed to separate the top part of his skull. "Personally I don't know if I was the good guy or the villain. But I can tell back at the time I was scared." I tell them, "Scared of becoming a monster myself." Tears after a long time had formed. They started to drop down like crazy. All the memories of the innocent. I kept on hearing begs for mercy. Nobody wanted to die and it was never needed. I had no mercy but it was because it wasn't mine to give. Soon it parallels to that building. Red smudged everywhere. I can hear people call me names everywhere. 'Devil', 'harlot', 'forsaken', 'witch', 'blasphomer', 'manwhore', the list went on. I then recall the last thing Furukizu mumbled to me, 'I pity hypocrites.' A small vision appeared of blood dripping all over a room with corpses for a slight moment. Then it stops.
The top part of the skull then falls open and the there it was, the core. It was wedged between the two lobes. I then took the tongs and pulled it out. It was dark and grim, much like my mind as it was clouding in confusion. "I don't know if I was hero or villain." I tell them, "But one thing's for sure.. If I stop now in fear… I'll probably go insane." Mr. Williams then takes me by the arm. "Maybe we should stop." He suggested. I then take my arm back. "I'm alright… I need to get stronger if we need to come back to the surface alive." I said. That's when Rebecca puts her hand on my shoulder. "'We' need to get stronger. You still got us." She corrected me.
I then wiped my tears and smiled. Tyrell then puts his hand in front of us. There he was again. Furukizu was there again. He snapped his fingers and I was at that red room again. I look at a distance and I see the world war two soldier on a different garb with a mountain full of bodies. And where I was I? The same thing, only to drown at them. With a blink of an eye the boy disappeared. How I remember him well. All I can do is put on a face to not worry everyone. We all wanted to be strong. I couldn't escape it but our fates were entwined. Oh god...you cannot forgive me just yet, can you?