When Zehell entered the cave, she was a little surprised that her Mother and siblings weren't back yet. But it was just as well. She didn't want the lecture for running off. Not while her mind felt so bogged down with her swirling doubts and desires. Zehell looked around a little more, making sure she really was alone. Then she entered the cave and curled up near the back. She buried her head beneath her wing and tried to think of nothing.
She succeeded for a moment until a sound behind her made her look up. There was nothing outside the cave, but the scuffle she heard reminded her of Eranoth's anxious pawing. His large paws and sharp claws. Sharp enough to penetrate her scales. Zehell shivered. At the same time, Eranoth hadn't done anything to Elyon or that red panda. What was her name again? Naz…? She closed her eyes. Elyon's voice had been soft when the red panda had spoken to him. But whatever her name was, even her tiny self was able to keep Eranoth away from her.
So, then what was the truth?! Eranoth was clearly a predator. He had been fighting with Fire when she and Elyon had arrived. And if what her parents had told her time and again was true then he would have harmed her. Would have harmed Naz... and Elyon, too. Loud laughter echoed through the cave as Craven and Anawan came sauntering in. Zehell covered her ears. Her brain was staring to hurt and the volume of her sibling's laughter grated on her ears.
"Hey, Zehell, you missed out on the most amazing…."
Zehell smacked Craven's forehead with the flat of her tail to get him to shut up. She didn't want to hear about the meadow. She wanted to be left alone.
"Hey!" he protested. "What was that for? I just wanted to…." He stopped when Zehell tucked her head under her wing again. "...Zehell?"
"Is something wrong, Zehell?" Anawan asked, her approaching steps hesitant.
Zehell didn't respond.
"Craven, Anawan, come here," their mother said gently. "Your sister needs some time alone."
"But she's been alone this whole time," Anawan replied, stepping closer to Mother.
"She still needs a little more."
There was a brief silence before Zehell shuddered. She could hear Craven's teeth grinding against whatever bone was in the center of meat Mother had given him. She did her best not to gag when mother set a meaty leg next to her. The smell of the blood and the sound of crunching bone were not helping her calm down. Her spinning thoughts were running wild with everything that could have gone wrong today because she had left the cave with Elyon. At the same time, she had been happy that she had been able to play with Elyon a little. To feel free for those few moments.
Zehell stiffened when she felt Mother scoot her closer to her warm belly. The warmth felt good, but she was worried about what Mother would say next. She didn't change her curled position, but it was nice to no longer hear Craven eating. The ensuing silence helped Zehell to clear her aching head. To slow her troubled heart some. She still felt on edge, since she didn't know how Mother would try to get her to open up.
"What put you in a bad mood this morning, Zehell?" Mother asked quietly, while nuzzling her wings.
Zehell didn't respond.
"Can I ask what you were doing this morning?"
"Cloud watching," she finally replied.
"Where you in a bad mood before you started cloud watching?
"No."
"I feel worried when you don't come right away. Where you outside the safe zone?"
"No, Mother!" Zehell snipped, shifting her head out from under her wing. "You know I don't leave the safe zone."
Her mother gave her a disappointed look. "Please do not snip. I know you are upset, but I can't correct the situation if you won't answer me in more than just a few words."
Zehell hid her head under her wing again. "I don't understand why I have to come immediately," she mumbled. "I wasn't in danger and I wasn't done!"
"You could have cloud watched at the meadow."
"It's not the same," she protested, looking up at Mother.
Mother sighed. "I know you like watching from the top of our cave, but there are dangers in this world that you cannot yet sense. So, until you are older I need for you to come when I call."
Tears of frustration filled Zehell's eyes. She got up. Her back arched slightly as she backed away from her mother. Zehell took the leg her mother gave her and dragged it as far from her family as she could. Her stomach was finally stirring enough for her to feel hungry. She lay with her back to everyone and bit into the flesh on the leg. 'Dangers I cannot yet sense. Ha! Elyon would have said something if there was danger nearby.' At least… she hope he would have.
Zehell swallowed the meat in her mouth. She took her next bite a little slower. The muddled events of this afternoon returned. She wanted to sort through them, but trying to grasp the sequence was like trying to scoop up worms. The order kept slipping away from her. She could see the other animals' faces and could mostly place a name with their face, but nothing else was willing to come. Finished with the leg now, Zehell let out her breath. She curled her tail and wings around her body and closed her eyes. Maybe she would have better luck in the morning.
©RedPandaChick (Ardnaxela)