"But why did you stop pursuing soccer? Was it no longer something you love?" As Ming spoke about the university, he realized something was missing in the story. He only realized he was being too inquisitive after he had said it. "Sorry if I had asked too much."
"Well, the answer to that question is a no and a yes. I do love soccer till this very day," Looking at Ming Yue Guang's face, Ming noticed that there was pain hidden behind his senior as he spoke, "The reason why I had to stop playing soccer in University was that in my first year of university, I was actually inflicted with a severe injury on my knee. My ACL, also known as anterior cruciate ligament had ruptured when a player had slide tackled my leg during a match."
Ming Yue Guang sat by the bus stop seats. He raised up his long pants to reveal up to his left knee where there was a long thin scar that spanned his entire knee. When Ming saw the scar, the boy's eyes quivered as he realized why his senior wasn't playing anymore, "I'm sorry to hear that…"
"Haha, it's fine. There's no need to feel sorry for me." Ming Yue Guang patted his junior's shoulder. "After the surgery and a year of rehab, I have more or less recovered all movement in my left leg. There is just a shadow that looms behind me now whenever I play soccer."
The talented young man had developed a fear of soccer now. No matter how much he loved soccer, he could still remember the days when he wasn't able to walk properly and had to make use of crutches to get around places. In his heart, he no longer dares to get on the field again professionally.
"It was probably why the Old Coach had asked of me to coach the little children for him while he went for his surgery. He was probably hoping that I would get over my fear slowly as I coach soccer. Sadly, I still think it is for the best that I never overcome my fear."
"Why do you think that?"
"Hmm…" Yue Guang's arms were placed behind the backrest as he watched the cars drive by, "You should know this well enough, the fear of letting people down. Anything that we humans do, there will always be expectations from others. The expectations may come from your parents, your peers, your teachers, your juniors. These are all external expectations that bring along external pressure. Right now, for me, going back to soccer once again would be about a tidal wave of pressure and expectations."
Ming Yue Guang looked at the young man sitting beside him. Talking with Ming yesterday and today, made him realize that having a companion to share these with had helped him relieve some of the burden sitting on his shoulders. Yue Guang spoke from the heart, "Ming, I'm scared of letting down everyone around me."
"Why should you be scared of these things, Yue Guang?" Ming looked into the fearful and worried man's eyes. "Why should others' expectations define who you are as a person? You are you and they are they."
"You giving up on soccer would have nothing to do with those people's expectations. You give up on soccer would be on YOU. You get to govern and dictate how you want to live your life. If you love soccer, why should other people's opinions matter? If you said that you are fearful of letting yourself down, the steps you should take moving forward would be different. For your case, Yue Guang, do you have doubts about yourself?"
"No, I do not doubt myself." Ming Yue Guang replied without hesitation. For his whole student life, he had practiced soccer non-stop, without rest. His grades faltered, but his soccer skills had never failed him.
"If so, why should you care about what others would think about you?" Hearing what Yue Guang had said, Ming smiled proudly. He knew that he had gotten through to his senior.
Before Ming could even react properly, Ming Yue Guang had turned his body and given the young man and a tight embrace. "Thank you."
Ming was shocked for a short moment. He raised his arms and reciprocated the hug. He was glad that he was able to help his savior out. "It is my pleasure."
On the way back to the University campus, Ming Yue Guang gave his Old Coach a call. His heart had been resolved and reassured by Ming. He was ready. "Hello, coach?"
"Hello, Little Guang. How did the last match go for the children?" The Old Coach spoke with a slightly raspy voice. It had become this way from the decades of shouting on the soccer field.
"It went great, coach. They won the game 4 nil."
"That's good to hear."
"I am actually calling to tell you about something else." Ming Yue Guang took a glance at the young man sitting beside him. He spoke smilingly and confidently, "I would like to try my luck again on the soccer field."
"Wait… What did you say?"
"I would like to try my luck again on the soccer field!" Ming Yue Guang enunciated his words for his Old Coach.
"What? Re..Really? You are not pulling this old man's leg, right? You're really going to come back?"
"Yeah, I will come back and try out my new knee cap. No promises though on whether I will be able to perform well."
"No, no that's good enough! I'm glad that you would like to give soccer another try again! Hahahaha!" The old coach was so loud that Ming could hear him laugh over the phone. Anyone could see that the old man had been waiting for a long time for Ming Yue Guang to come back.