[The crowd is quite noisy tonight. They're getting impatient; I've been backstage for too long. So I give them what they want: the lazy, inconsistent author that is The3Crimson3Kane.]
Crowd Member 1: Finally! Where have you been?
Me: *leans into the mic* Calm down. Your author here has been busy.
Crowd Member 2: Doing what? Lying in bed like a bum and reading manga?
[I felt a pang in my chest. They knew exactly what I'd been doing!]
Me: *shrugs sheepishly* Okay, okay. I admit: I've been a bit lazy these past few days. But I'll try my hardest to get at least one chapter a day...or two.
[The grumbling increased. The readers aren't happy the author isn't keeping up with the update system.]
Crowd Member 1: When are you going to post a new chapter? You left us on a cliffhanger!
Me: *Scratches head* I did, didn't I? Unfortunately, you're going to have to wait a bit longer. I've started a new project!
Crowd Member 2: What!? You can't even post consistently on ONE story! Now you're going to handle two?!
[A reasonable reader steps up to the plate. He raises his arms, trying to calm the crowd.]
Reasonable Crowd Member: Alright, alright. The author here is trying to give us something new to read. What's your story about?
[I grin. This reasonable person lives up to his name!]
Me: Cultivation!
[The crowd goes silent. Even the reasonable crowd member is staring up at the author incredulously.]
Me: *Clears throat* So, how about it? A cultivation novel?
Crowd Member 1: Do you even know what cultivation is?
Me: Of course I do! I've read tons of novels about it!
Crowd Member 2: Yeah, but READING about it is way different WRITING it.
Me: You'll love it, I promise. I may not fully understand it, but I've got the gist. Cultivation levels, weird sounding ingredients, a snappy MC. I've got it all down. You just wait. I'll see you in, like, forty minutes.
[Before the crowd can protest any longer, I moonwalk backstage. Heading back to my little corner where I'm *constantly* popping out chapters, I settle down, ready to write.]