After a while, Xiao Lei gulped before she said, "Zhi Hao… If it's really unbearable, then--"
Zhi Hao shook his head and said with a strong voice, "Mum, I'm fine, really. I know how to protect myself. If it gets too bad, I'd fight back. I won't let them go overboard."
He then pushed himself back gently before looking up into her eyes. With a determined tone, he said, "I'll not let others destroy my future... Our future..."
Xiao Lei wiped off the tears that were at the corner of her eyes with her shirt. She grinned and ruffled her son's still-wet hair and said in a soft tone, "Your dad would be so proud of you… "
After a moment of silence, Zhi Hao said, "Mum… Dad's not coming back…"
"It's only been a little more than two years… "
"No matter what, he'd never have left just like that. Even if he is in hiding from someone, he'd have found a way to let us know..."
"Zhi Hao..."
"Besides, even if he comes back, he won't blame you for giving birth to another man's child," Zhi Hao said, "Dad loves you more than anything… He won't want to see you working yourself to death like this."
"I know… " muttered Xiao Lei.
"We need money. I don't want you to live here any longer. It's not safe. Who knows when those b*stards would break into the house? I know you're strong, but you can't win them if they ganged up on you." Zhi Hao frowned.
The b*stards he mentioned were his neighbors. Some of them held grudges against his father, and he knew that they were only waiting for the right time to attack.
If it was not for his mother's insistence, he would have stayed at home to protect her. Instead, he had to worry about her constantly while he was at school.
Xiao Lei felt that she was so weak to the point that her almost 13-year-old son had to worry for her. This was not what she wanted when she gave birth to him.
With a smile, she said, "Let me think about it. Why don't you go and read first? I'll call you when dinner is ready… "
Zhi Hao looked around the empty kitchen and said, "There's nothing for you to cook."
Xiao Lei looked around as well before she facepalmed herself. She did not expect her son to come home tonight, so she did not buy anything.
Since she was living alone now, most of the time, she would merely eat sandwiches or instant noodles at the convenience store.
Eating there, it helped her saved money, and she did not have to waste time washing anything. Also, they provided hot water and coffee for free as well.
Any extra money that she had, she placed aside for her son's future. The day Zhi Hao was born, her husband had opened a joint account for him, and she had been depositing most of her money into that account.
It was for their son's college tuition fees, and she did not want to delay on the savings.
She looked at her wallet and once she was sure that she had enough, she said, "I'll call for delivery then. You like fried chicken, right?"
She might be thrifty, but she would never skimp out when it was about her son's wellbeing.
Zhi Hao smiled and nodded. "That's my favorite!"
"Then I'll order a bucket set and we can share." Xiao Lei smiled. "Go now, I'll help you massage with the eggs later."
The boy nodded before he walked off.
...
After the eggs were done and slightly cooled down, she called for her son and the two sat in the living room as she massaged his bruises for him.
"Did it hurt?" asked Xiao Lei as she massaged his stomach for him. Zhi Hao was lying on the couch while reading a programming textbook that he borrowed from the school library.
He was taking programming as one of his extra classes this year, and unfortunately, it was one of his worse subjects.
They were studying at a faster pace than he was used to.
"No," replied Zhi Hao as he continued to read.
"Liar, how could it not hurt?"
Zhi Hao placed the book lower and looked at his mother before he said jokingly, "Not like you know what it would be like. Dad protected most of your whole life!"
Xiao Lei smiled, but she did not say anything. She and her husband had never told their son about their past.
What Zhi Hao did not know was that she knew what it was like to be beaten up. After all, she spent a few months on the street before her husband found her.
At that time, she was inexperienced, and she was often caught when she tried to steal food from the convenience store.
Her husband and she met when she tried to steal from him when he was outside a convenience store.
She thought he was sleeping and snuck over. Just as she reached out to steal his wallet, he caught her hand.
At that time, she was only 13 years old.
When he caught her, she had closed her eyes as she expected another beating. However, not only did he not beat her, he bought her a fresh, hot meal.
"It's not good to steal," he said.
As she stuffed her mouth full, she replied, "I'm not... not stealing. I'm borrowing."
"Are you going to return it to me?"
"Of course."
"When?"
"When I have the money... "
"Putting aside the fact that that's going to take forever, how are you going to find me?"
"If I borrowed the money from you here, obviously I'm going to pay you back here."
"But I can't always be here?"
"Then, that's your fault!"
He was stunted by her logic of pushing the blame to the victim, but he laughed instead of scolding her.
He then patted her head and after leaving her with some cash, he left her alone.
She would always see him walking around that area, and even though she knew what his profession was at that time, she was not afraid of him.
He was always kind to her, and as if he knew she was looking at him, he would always leave food outside the convenience store where they first met.
After a long time, they started to talk to each other and he would always talk kindly to her.
Her husband was older than her, and he took care of her. He taught her how to steal, how to fight, and how to run.
Everything that she needed to know to survive on the street, he taught her. Whatever she missed out from not being able to go to school, he would find someone to teach her.
And at first, he was just like an older brother to her. A well revered older brother. Someone who protected her, who cared for her.
But as years passed by and as she grew older, she started to develop feelings for him. For a long time, he had never thought of her that way.
But once he found out about her feelings, it did not take long for him to reciprocate as well.
When she was 22, she found herself pregnant with their son. Just as she was worried about the money, her husband suddenly found a good job.
He never said what it was, and she never asked either. But she knew! When he came back that night, bloodied and bruised, she knew that he had done something illegal!
"That's all I know... I'm sorry... " Her husband had said softly when he saw her horrified look at his gunshot wound.
"You promised! You promised if I got out, you won't go back into that life!" Xiao Lei had cried that night. They tried so hard to get out of the gang life, but it was tough!
They had no formal education, and no matter how smart or hardworking they were, no one would give them a chance!
She knew that the money he got from the last job was running out. Over the last 10 years, they spent more time unemployed than not.
Even if they got a job, the money they managed to earn was barely enough to keep them afloat.
"That was the last..." Her husband had promised her when he saw that she broke down. "I just want our son to have a better life... "
With the money he got from it, he moved them far away from their old town and bought the house they were currently staying in.
That job was supposed to be his last dangerous job, but around two years ago, someone called him in for another job.
"But you promised! We're supposed to raise our son with clean hands!" Xiao Lei had yelled as she blocked the door.
"Mum? Dad? You guys are loud..." Zhi Hao had walked down from his room and he was rubbing his sleepy eyes as he looked at his parents.
It was the middle of the night, and he had barely fell asleep before he heard them talking.
The boy's father went over and kissed him on the forehead. "Zhi Hao, be good, alright? Go back to bed. Mum and I are talking."
Zhi Hao looked worriedly at his mother for a second before he walked up the stairs.
Once he left, the man turned back to Xiao Lei.
"Zhi Hao is so smart. He's going to secondary school soon, and maybe he can get into university! But there's no guarantee he can get a scholarship! Xiao Lei, people like us, as parents, if we don't do the dirty deeds, it's hard for our children to escape this life."
As he said that, he had looked at his wife with a pained expression.
As much as he wanted to stay clean and stay out of the underground world, the fact was that the world had been against him from the beginning.
Fighting and killing were the things he knew best. They were the only things that kept him alive all these years!
"No! There's always another way!" She cried as she clutched onto her chest.
She had her faults but there was certain lines she would never crossed, and she did not want him to cross it again.
He smiled at her. "Alright then...."
When he opened up his arms, she thought that he was staying and ran into his embrace. He placed a kiss on her forehead before whispering, "I'm sorry..."
Xiao Lei looked at him weirdly before she felt the sharp pain at the base of her neck. "You-"
Before she fainted, she heard him promised that he would be back shortly... but he never did.
Even though Xiao Lei had a feeling that something was wrong, she kept believing, hoping, that one day, he would appear in front of her again.