My anxiety didn't let me calm down even for a moment. It may seem like a normal issue but I was freaking out like hell. I knew that I should go home and wait for her arrival.
It was around 4.30 pm when I reached home. I stayed there thinking that she will come home soon. Sitting on the couch I kept on tapping my foot vigorously. One minute felt like one hour to me.
Thankfully I heard someone's footsteps approaching me and I got up from my sit with a little faith in my heart. As I looked up to see the person walked at me I ran and warped my arms around her.
" Hey..... what are doing?" Stella asked me with a frown. She was confused with my reaction.
" I was worried about you." That was all I could say.
" But why? Nothing happened to me." I let go her from my grip. It was already awkward that I hugged her suddenly. I had no intention of making her feel uncomfortable.
" Well... your phone was switched off so, I thought something might happen to you." I sounded so childish with my reasoning. Like seriously?! Who would ever do that?
" Actually my phone is having some problems so it turned off when I was talking to you. I would have called you back but I didn't remembered your number." I kept my head down. It was embarrassing for me to speak with her eye to eye contact. " Even though I didn't called you back, there was no need for you to worry for me. I was having lunch with Ray."
As soon I heard that guy's name I was furious. My mood became cranky thinking about Ray since everything turned out like this because of him. I tried to calm my self down and control my temper.
" Why would he have lunch with you? You were supposed to be at the office. How did you guys meet up?" Shit. I screwed up everything. I wanted to be civil and solve the issue quickly but my bitch side popped up at the wrong time.
Great.
" Why are you saying it like that Theo? Ray was around that area when I was about to have lunch with my colleagues. Since he left yesterday without having dinner I decided to take him for lunch. But I don't see any issue with this. Why are you mad at me?" Stella's attitude changed too. She looked angry and irritated with me. The situation is going out of hand.
" I don't care with whom you have lunch with but you should have informed me about it." I spat out in anger and instantly regretted my action.
" Why do I have to tell you?! Didn't we agreed to stay out of each other's life? Then why are you butting in my life?"
" Your life? You should be aware that what you do outside with others, it can affect my public image. So, I'm only concerned about that. Make sure you remember it." I left there and shut my door with a bang.
What have I done? I kept on asking myself. This is the first time I had a fight with Stella. I never thought that I will say those words to her. All because of this Ray. I'm so fucking pissed at myself that I wanna punch myself.
Lamenting on my action will do me no good.
I laid on my bed and stared at the ceiling. Thoughts kept on flashing over my eyes. It seems like I was reviewing my past. The happy moments which I had spent with Stella. Our honeymoon trip which was probably the best trip I ever had. The time we spent together eating breakfast and dinner. I feel a sudden pain spreading inside my heart like a thorn being pierced.
There was a knock on the door. Might be Stella calling me down for dinner.
" Dinner is served." It sounded so bland and expressionless. I didn't bother to answer I just laid there. Time has past and I just laid on my bed. I moved my head to see the clock on my bedside table. It was 1 am in the middle of night. My appetite had died long time ago but I felt thirsty.
I went downstairs to grab a bottle of water from the fridge. When I came around the dinner table I saw that there were some foods kept on the table, covered neatly.
Stella must have kept the food on the table so, I can come here and eat. My appetite was still not recovered but I grabbed a spoon and took few bites of the chicken stew. It was tasty sadly I couldn't eat more than those spoonful. My heart was aching with sorrow. Holding the bottle of water I came back to my room. I had thought of drinking some wine or strong alcohol but it will only make my pain worse. I need to repent on my behaviour.
My eyes opened facing the ceiling. The room was lighter and brighter which means that it's morning now. I looked at the time and it was 8.20 am. I always wake up early but maybe after staying up so late made me sleep much longer.
I went downstairs after getting ready. My stomach was empty and I felt weak. It's a new day—— a new beginning. So, I guess things will go back to normal like it were. With a positive vibe I entered the dining room.
But there was no one at a sight. Lucy walked out from the kitchen and stared at me.
" Where's Stella?"
" Miss has left already. She told me to serve the breakfast today."
Looks like this time I will have to suffer lot more than I had anticipated. I ate the breakfast with a heavy heart because I needed energy to continue working. With my busy schedules and work I have to eat properly to keep my system fine.
Every time I feel distress and troubled I just drown myself with work. It helps me to forget all my worries, problems, tensions etc.
" Sir"
"...."
" Sir"
"....."
My shoulder was shaken by someone and I noticed it was John—— my assistant.
" Yes?" Although I had no idea what was happening I replied to them. All of the stuffs were looking at me with a blank stare.
" We shall discus this matter after lunch break. The meeting is dismissed for now." John had taken the responsibility of keeping the work atmosphere intact. Everyone left the room and it was only me with John.
" You seemed lost in the whole meeting. Is everything all right? " As expected from my assistant cum friend John, he already noticed my behaviour.
~ to be continued