The Priests Rooster
A priest had lost a rooster and didn't know where to find it.
So at the sermon next day he queried "Has anybody got the cock ?"
All the men stood up.
"No no I mean has anybody seen the cock?"
All the women folk stood up.
"No no I mean has anybody seen my cock?"
All the nuns stood up!
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Change of plan
There's a husband and wife at a nude beach and there lying in the sun nude.All of a sudden this bee flies up into the girls you know what...
The guy covers up his wife and takes her directly to the doctor. The doctor inspects the girls vagina and says to the girl "The bee is pretty far up there, our only chance of getting him out is if your husband smears honey on to the tip of his penis and procedes to have intercourse with you.
The husband decides to give it a try. He smears on the honey but he cant get hard because he is just so worried about his wife. The doctor says "I wouldn't mind giving it a try if neither of you object."
The couple agrees to let the doctor to this and he procedes to smear the honey on to the tip of his dick and then he started screwing the girl.
He's screwing her for about 3 minutes and the husband gets the idea that he's enjoying himself. So the husband finally steps up and says "Ok you've been having sex for a while now.
Whats going on? Is the bee out yet?" Then the doctor says "Change of plan, I am gonna drown the little bastard.