One day a man walks into a whore house. He goes to the pimp and says, "I want something different."
The pimp says "Well, we have one girl that loves to take it up the ass."
"No, that's too common. I want something different."
"Well, have you ever tried a Hurricane Gussy?"
"I'll be damned, that is different. I'll try that."
The man goes up to the room and takes off his clothes. A minute later a huge Amazon type women comes in. She starts jumping up and down, blowing as hard as she can. The man says, "What the hell are you doing?"
"I'm Hurricane Gussy and that is the wind coming from the Hurricane."
"OK, I'll buy that."
Then she starts beating him over the head with her breasts.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"Those are the coconuts nuts falling off the tree hittin' you on the head."
The man says alright. Then she stands over top of him and starts pissing all over him. "What the hell are you doing?!!"
"Those are the warm rains coming from the hurricane."
The man gets up and starts to put on his clothes. Gussy says, "Where are you going?"
"I'm leaving!! Who can fuck in this weather?!"
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Almost Married!
These two guys meet after not having seen each other for many years.
The first guy asks the second guy, "How have things been going?
The second guy speaking very s.l.o.w.l.y tells the first guy,
"I w.a.s a.l.m.o.s.t m.a.r.r.i.e.d."
The first guys says in amazement "Hey, you don't stutter any more."
The second guy replies:
"Y.e.s I w.e.n.t t.o a d.o.c.t.o.r a.n.d h.e t.o.l.d m.e t.h.a.t i.f I s.p.e.a.k s.l.o.w.l.y t.h.e.n I w.i.l.l n.o.t s.t.u.t.t.e.r."
The first friend congradulates him and then asks again about how he was almost married.
"W.e.l.l m.y f.i.a.n.c.e a.n.d I w.e.r.e s.i.t.t.i.n.g o.n h.e.r p.o.r.c.h a.n.d t.h.e d.o.g w.a.s s.c.r.a.t.c.h.i.n.g h.i.s b.a.c.k a.n.d I t.o.l.d h.e.r t.h.a.t w.h.e.n w.e a.r.e m.a.r.r.i.e.d s.h.e c.a.n d.o t.h.a.t f.o.r m.e a.n.d s.h.e t.h.r.e.w t.h.e r.i.n.g i.n m.y f.a.c.e"
"Why did she throw the ring in your face for that?" asks the first friend.
"W.e.l.l I s.p.e.a.k s.o s.l.o.w.l.y t.h.a.t b.y t.h.e t.i.m.e s.h.e l.o.o.k.e.d a.t t.h.e d.o.g h.e w.a.s l.i.c.k.i.n.g h.i.s b.a.l.l.s"