Insurance Companies
Four insurance companies are in competition. One comes up with the slogan, "Coverage from the cradle to the grave."
The second one tries to improve on that with, "Coverage from the womb to the tomb."
Not to be outdone, the third one comes up with, "From the sperm to the worm."
The fourth insurance company really thought hard and almost gave up the race, but finally came up with, "From the erection to the resurrection."
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Adventures of Jack & Jill
Jack and Jill, are out for a romantic walk along a country lane They walk hand in hand and as they stroll, Jack's lustful desire rises to a peak. He is just about to get frisky when Jill says, "I hope you don't mind but I really do need to piss."
Slightly taken back by this he replies, "OK Why dont you go behind this hedge."
She nods and disappears behind the hedge.
As Jack waits there he hears the sound of nylon knickers rolling down here legs and imagines what is being exposed.
Unable to control his thoughts a moment longer, Jack reaches a hand through the hedge and touches her leg. He quickly brings his hand further up her thigh until suddenly and with great astonishment finds himself gripping a long, thick appendage hanging between her legs.
Jack shouts in horror, "Oh no, Jill.... have you changed your sex?"
"No," she replies. "But I changed my mind, I'm taking a shit instead."