It was good advice, and Harris thought about it all the way up until he saw Joshua again.
That was almost a week later. Just when Harris had begun to think something might have gone wrong again, Joshua had called to ask if Harris wanted to meet for lunch, perhaps at the café where they had run into each other that time.
Perhaps, Harris thought, given his interest in the place, it was the girl who worked in that very café that Joshua liked after all.
Harris's feelings on the subject were unfortunately mixed, and that was probably why he found himself running a little late when he got there. Joshua was already sitting at the same table that Harris had been when he asked if they could see more of each other. The girl from before- Dianna- was there too and she was flirting with Joshua as if her life depended on it.
Harris ordered something quickly. He hardly thought about what it was, because Joshua's eyes kept flicking over to him, something frightened and faintly pleading in them. Joshua was so warm and pleasant to be around once you got past his prickly exterior that it was difficult for Harris to believe that he might be so bad with women that he needed a rescue- a rescue Harris was hardly in a position to give.
Before Harris was close enough to hear him, Joshua said something to Dianna that did not appear to be well received. She glanced at Harris, looking confused, and then shrugged and drew away. Her aura was still only a bit red, and there wasn't a trace of purple in sight. If she liked Joshua it was physical, a passing interest, so Harris supposed it was just as well. He tried to ignore the strange feeling in his chest, as if something had been gripping his heart and squeezing it, and had only just now let it go.
"Sorry," Joshua said when Harris sat down across from him.
"What for?" Harris asked. He reached out to Joshua but then hesitated, wondering if he should in a public place, especially with Dianna watching. But if Joshua was interested in her he would have made it plain, so Harris took his hand.
Joshua gripped him back hard, and after a brief hesitation of his own raised Harris's hand to his lips and kissed the knuckles. Harris was surprised. Embarrassing physical displays of affection had thus far been primarily Harris's purview, and it seemed… odd- heavier- coming from Joshua. But perhaps that was what Joshua had wanted him to come over so quickly for. If Joshua was emphatically not interested in this girl, he could well have implied to her that he and Harris were… more than friends. Indeed, Harris saw her glance their way and frown, as if she didn't know what Joshua saw in someone like Harris but wasn't especially bothered about it either.
'Just as well,' Harris thought again, though it did make the question of who Joshua had his eye on even more complicated.
Another waitress brought Harris what he'd ordered, a drink and nothing else.
Joshua looked oddly relieved. "You aren't staying?"
"I stopped by a bakery earlier," Harris explained, deciding to imply that he had eaten already since he couldn't very well admit that he hadn't been hungry today and didn't technically need to eat. He had been back to the shop Mary had decided to order the wedding cake from, and he'd bought Joshua a cupcake in the flavor the two women had favored. "I bought you something."
Joshua peered into the bag Harris had with him. He flushed but looked pleased. "Thank you, Harris."
Harris gave him a smile.
Joshua finished his lunch quickly, and he and Harris walked to a nearby park while Joshua told him stories from his work. Harris listened carefully as Joshua picked out a bench, trying to determine from how Joshua talked if it was one of his coworkers he was interested in. However much Harris strained, he couldn't pick up a clear preference for anyone.
Joshua paused in his storytelling, and the look of bliss on his face as he tried the cupcake would have been worth any amount of trouble. "Have you tasted this?" Joshua asked.
Harris shook his head, and accepted the cake when Joshua passed it to him to try. He went still, arrested by how Joshua looked, smiling messily with a bit of frosting on his nose. Harris tried the cake, which was as good as Mary had claimed but nowhere near as sweet as Joshua's expression. "Thank you," Harris said. He passed the dessert back and then produced a handkerchief, wiping Joshua's nose with it.
It occurred to him that he had seen a markedly similar exchange between Cytherea and Mary, and that it would certainly look that way to anyone passing them now. The notion- odd and surely silly- so occupied Harris's mind that he didn't at first notice Joshua clearly wrestling with himself over whether or not to say something.
"Harris," Joshua said at last.
"Yes?" Harris banished his earlier train of thought immediately. Dealing with the anxiety that he could hear in Joshua's tone was much more important.
"You don't talk much about the people in your life. And I ain't met any of them."
Harris stopped and stared at Joshua. He had, in fact, told Joshua a few much edited stories about his colleagues at the "tailor's shop." But of course Joshua hadn't met anyone from Harris's life- he had no one apart from his coworkers, and until his talk with Tresnal just recently it had never occurred to Harris that Joshua might be able to meet any of them at all.
But now that Joshua mentioned it Harris could see that it was bothering him. After the effort he had gone through to bring Harris into his family and introduce him to his friends- and given his ingrained tendency to worry that he wasn't good enough- it seemed unavoidable that Joshua would draw the conclusion that Harris was ashamed of him.
"Joshua," Harris said at last. "The fact is I'm not friendly with many people. But…"
But, given what he had talked to Tresnal about and how valid it was, it seemed like a good idea that Joshua meet another cupid as a friend of Harris's. It would be a low stakes way to determine if Joshua was aware of them the same way he was of Harris. The problem, of course, was that if they were as unnoticeable to Joshua as Harris was to everyone else, it would be awkward. If Harris went through all the trouble of organizing a lunch together, or something to that effect, Joshua would want to like Harris's friends, and feel embarrassed when they simply didn't stick in his mind.
No, somewhere public would be better. Somewhere Joshua could brush someone Harris knew who was indescribably boring off as just that without feeling he'd let Harris down. Somewhere where Joshua could meet people, get used to Harris as the kind of friend he could do that in front of, and- maybe with a little drink in him- mention who in his life had caught his eye.
"But?" Joshua pressed, waiting.
"But I do know someone who's getting married in a little while and I've been invited to their wedding. Would you like to come?"
"Harris," Joshua half-choked. "Fuck. Uh. Yeah. Yeah, I would. I don't really got nothing to wear, though."
"That's all right," Harris said immediately. "As I've told you, I work in a tailor's shop."