" I am choosing you. I know that it's gonna be difficult but hang in there till the last. Please , you are my last hope. Be a fighter. I know that I am asking for a lot from you but now , I don't have any choice left. If you want to live happily later , you have to do it. I saved your life. Please do this for me. Never forget me. FIGHTING!!!!! "

He told me to fight when he was on the verge of death but now I feels like it's a just a waste of time. I can live my life in a way that I always wanted to be. I think I am happy now.

But I don't know how long I can be happy like this. I can't even forget about it. Sometimes I feels like that something is broken inside me. I still don't know what's it.....

How long it will take? Noone knows. But I am broken now . I wonder if I continue my life like this or not. He chose me but I never chose it. I don't know whether I can do it or not. I really want to end my life.