'Oh shit.. stop.. n-not there- hah~'
'Shush, don't make any noise. You don't want the teachers to hear us, do you?'
I have my eyes planted on the manga book I am reading which I had it purchased online. I can't help but to drool over at what I am reading—well it's not actually drooling, it's just my saliva's dripping down my chin, you can call it slobbering at some point but it's not drooling!
Do you get what I mean?
"Go fuck his brain out!" I exclaimed while reading the manga. The top character slowly — but surely — made it's way to its bottom.
As he lean closer, closer, and very very closer. Their lips is about to collide when—
"Dear Jesus child of Mary! What are you reading honey?"
Oh fuck no.
It's dad.
He stomps his way toward me and grabbed the book I was holding. And yup, he knew exactly what hell it is before he can even enter my fucking room.
He had caught me reading boy's smut, like, twenty times? No, maybe fifty.
"No it's not what you think dad! I-I-I just bought it! What? No! I mean a friend of mine shown it to me then I decided to borrow it for a while. uh.. yeah hehe." I grin, not grin of happiness guys, but the please-don't-fucking-kill-me kinda grin.
"You don't even have a friend." he sigh.
That hurts my individuality. Yeah dad, thanks for bringing it up.
"This is disgusting Blaine, you should really stop this habit of yours fantasizing both men. It's awful." he said and placed the manga against the table, closing it.
Shit it didn't have a bookmark on it. What page am I again?
"The New Year's eve will be in thirty minutes. Go get yourself dressed and ready. I'll wait for you in the veranda." said dad and finally made its way outside my room, closing the door behind him. I sigh in relief.
It's normal, he does catch me everyday but he still make a big deal out it. As if it's his first time seeing the world's-most-ridiculous-creation.
Oh yeah, New Year's Eve. How could I forget?
I collapse onto bed and glance at my bl manga. I sighed once again. I was about to read the good part. Damn. But maybe I could wait until tomorrow.
Why do people make a big deal out it? They always blatter around saying it's stupid but then why do they even care at the first place?
You know, ever since I got into highschool, my fate was rounded by yaoi. I buy boxes of manga books every month just to satisfy my life. But I never feel awful though, despite the fact that no one wants to befriend me because they kind of think I am sort of weird or something.
Back when my life was still lame—when I still stan boys to girls relationships—I thought of my life like some sort of fairytale. Like one day I'll find my prince-charming-white-horse-rider when I matures or grow enough. But now that I'm older I feel like it's such a waste to have a prince charming like that, I mean, I'm not enough, I can't make him happy at all. I can't make him moan nor groan in pleasure. I can't satisfy his sexual needs and desires. Why tho?
Because I don't have penis! All I have is this fucking useless stupid looking tit and a fucking useless hole. What can it do? None! I rather grope an ass than to grope a breast.
So as a good princess I am, I am willing to give up and hand my prince charming to another prince out there. Who could make him happy. Who he can spend his whole night screwing.
And of course I'll be there watching the both them fuck up while I'm in a couch eating a popcorn with a soda on me.
You know, girls are disgusting. They're exaggerated bitches. I hate the way they walk, the way they talk, the way they hang around with guys, and the way they seduce them! Oh poor babies.
It's obviously obvious that men aren't interested in girls. Why? because they're girls! They'll just annoy every fucking waking days of men.
I know it's weird that I'm speaking as the third person here even I myself a woman. I just can't help it, and I kinda hate myself for being a girl and having a tit instead of dick.
I always wanted to be a man just to be gay. And it's really weird.
I rise from bed and immediately head to the bathroom—that is in my bedroom— to wash myself. It's been our tradition to celebrate the New Year's countdown with family. But since my mom died couple of years ago, it's been just me and dad.
He's a perfect father to be honest. He took a really good care of me. He's a mystery writer and his name is well-known, Harry Jones, that is. He's perfect, despite being a homophobic person we don't really get along with the BL stuffs. But apart that, everything is great!
My name is Blaine Jones by the way, in senior highschool and I am seventeen years old, but my birthday is near though so I'll just say that I'm eighteen. I always say that really, especially when I'm purchasing yaoi smut online. They often asks me about my age.
After dressing up, I head straight to the veranda where my dad's waiting with his pink apron and mittens on. He's holding a tray of brownies which immediately made my eyes shine brightly as a diamond.
Woah, dude, you don't know how much I crave for brownies.
"So you're here!" he said and placed the tray onto table.
"Uh.. yeah?" I replied.
Minutes had passed and we were just sitting right there talking about random stuffs waiting for the twelve o'clock to strike. It's fun talking to dad, he always has this talent where he never runs out of topics.
"This is probably the worst thing I've ever done in my life," dad said sighing. I furrowed my brows and looks at him curiously.
What worst?
"Here. I had bought it this afternoon when I was heading home."
I have my eyes on the rolled paper on his hand, it was thick.
"What is this, dad?" I asked while unrolling the paper. It's a poster size—
Wait what the fuck?
My eyes immediately popped out off their sockets as when my eyes trailed to the poster in my hands. Yes it's a poster. And a large one.
It's a poster of my favourite yaoi manga characters with the two of them on bed. The one is half naked and in bottom of another while the other one is FULLY NAKED.
"I don't know what's that about, but it is kinda erotic." he said as he collapse his head onto the table. Lol dad, lol.
But what 'kinda erotic'? My poor dearest innocent dad, it IS erotic.
"Who're those?" he said as soon as he turned his head up again and pointed the characters on the poster.
"Oh! this is my husband."
Dad whose giving me a weird look, "..yeah sure.. and the other one is...?"
"Oh and he's my husband's husband."
Dad immediately losts his balance and fall out of the chair making a THUD sound. Wait am I really that weird? No my dad is a lot weirder. Why did he hand me this after telling me to stop reading yaoi earlier?
"Yeah right. I feel sorry for asking."
"What did I do to deserve this? I've tried my best to be the best dad to the max! But how on Earth did my child turned perve—"
"Dad why did you buy it?" I asked, really curious about it guys.
"I told you I'm outta my mind." he snorts. Im still not convinced though so I stare at him curiously.
"Fine." he said raising both of his arms as a sign of surrender. "If that what makes my daughter happy, I should have nothing against it."
**
Woaaah! It's really 12 o'clock bitches!
"HAPPY NEW YEAR DAD!" I exclaimed as loud as i could. Countless of fireworks are exploding on the sky so my voice isn't really that clear enough to be heard.
"Oh wait." I immediately run towards the counter to get the fireworks we have and runs back to dad again who's outside watching the other neighboring fireworks display exploding in the night sky.
"Make a wish honey." he said and smiled at me. I grin back.
I gave him the thing and he started doing something about it that I am not really that familiar.
Wish? I don't really believe in wishes. Especially in this kind of occasions. Why would I make a wish? And why does it matter?
Back when I was ten I can still remember the last wish I had asked. And that is to make my parents happy for the rest of our lives. But that's exactly the year when my mom died in a tragic car accident. Ever since then, I started not to believe in wishes.
"Come on Blaine, say something before I shoot the fireworks."
Hah! as if it's gonna come true anyway.
I never had any wishes that comes true, never. I'm that hopeless, I'm pathetic.
Sighing, "As if it's going to come true anyway."
I closed my eyes.
I inhale a right amount of air.
I listened to the sound of explosions.
I think of the stupidest thing ever.
Hm.. Let's see...
I want to fuck a man. A hot one.
I want to date a guy. A cool one.
I want to become a man. A strong one.
I want to grow a dick. A big one.