It was a cozy day. I was expecting Cris - my long time "big bro" crush, to come and passed by to our house for today. I quickly ran to the bathroom, take a bath, do my morning routine. And change my clothes into my favorite dress. As I put on my sandals on, I hurriedly go down to our bamboo stairs, he was there. He offered me his sweet smile. His eyes were sparkling like a river. His calm face that attracts me. His lips saying "kiss me". My face was turning red and I felt a hot sensation. I don't know why he was turning me this way. It was a magical feeling- a mixed emotion of being happy yet lonely.

Maybe because he was 35 and I'm just 15. He greeted me "hello young lady, a sweet morning." He was with my cousin Ben, holding his guitar. Cris was a good singer. I loved him since I was in 5th grade. It was 4 years ago already. Time flies but I think I'm just a kid. And I literally think that. And he was old for me. Too old for my age. And that thought keep pushing my lonely feeling into its peak and turns into anxiety, bitterness and jealousy. There were many girls for him. Too many girls that for him I was just a kid.

But the feeling of being happy prevails when he was with me. Everyday he came to our house. Cris was in a vacation. He was dropped-out. He was still in college. His parents was expecting him to graduate this year but unfortunately he was not going to because of subjects he failed. He was handsome, he has a tan skin, black hair, he was 6ft tall. He was a varsity player in the University he was attending. He kept on playing online games and maybe that was the reason why he kept on failing his subjects.

He was with me everyday in this whole summer. He will carry with him his guitar and we will go to the beach. He would sing for me. Sometimes he would treat me in the town. We would cross the island by a boat and drive for at least an hour to the town. He would bought me my favorite ice cream, we would eat in a restaurant and buy me books since I loved reading. Cris was a nice guy. He was. Sometimes I envy those girls- with curved body, wearing lipstick, makeups. Those girls that was near to his age.

The next day, he would again offer me to go to other town. Our trip was a lot of fun.. again. I am falling in love with him. I think I was now deeply in love with him. As the sun sets at the east, he offered his hand as I walked through the stones near the beach and then hugged me. I can't do anything about the moment. I just seized it. He looked at me. And slowly kissed me. 💙