Adding on that it did bother her on some level that she was so inexperienced in romantic matters or other aspects she considered "normal" for a woman. From a young age she had to sacrifice many things and focus on surviving. Once surviving became easier, the goal switched to escaping and making a better life for herself. In the middle of that journey her goal became revenge and that's all she's focused on for the past three years. No where in that period of time was she functioning on a quiet or normal schedule befitting of a woman her age.
The more things were deprived from someone, the more idealistic it became in their mind. Due to the amount of time she had to think about it, time meaning years, the expectations naturally grew along with it. When it came to being 'normal' she put it on a high pedestal, romance also went on its own pedestal, and any other thing she could not attain because of her background.
