Ruan-jie rubbed her forehead after putting the phone back in my hand.
"Go grab your things. I'm going to walk you out. You're a bit worse than usual. If I leave you here, who knows where you might end up in your lost state."
I was ushered back to my desk, pushed into my jacket and my bag was placed on my shoulder.
Outside the office, Ruan-jie handed my hand over to Mr Wen who seemed to have been waiting in the carpark for me.
"Take her to see a doctor and find out what's wrong with her brain," she ordered. "I can't cover for her forever and her condition's been getting worse. I don't know what's going on either but here are the copies of her last examination last year that she doesn't remember."
A folder was slapped on Mr Wen's chest and then Ruan-jie strode back into the office.
"What's wrong with you?" Mr Wen asked me, leading me to his car.
"I don't know," I shrugged. "I don't feel sick."
Mr Wen took a moment to glimpse through the file in his hand, his face becoming tense and eyebrows creasing. He took a long, slow and deep breath while I cowered against the car door. He was still for a long moment, when he moved again, I woke up.
"Is there something wrong with me? What's in the file?" I asked.
"Nothing," Mr Wen leaned over to give me a breathtaking kiss and secure my seatbelt for me. "Let's go to the embassy. I've already made an appointment."
"I thought we were going on the weekend?" I asked.
"I decided after last night that I'd better speed things along or you may run away from me when you come back to your senses," Mr Wen chuckled while he drove. "I have to take advantage of this time."
"Huh," I turned my face away to look out the window, only to discover that we weren't going back to my apartment. Then again, how would he know where my apartment was if I had never told him? That was right. He had said we were going to the embassy. "Why are we going to the embassy?"
"To get married. Have you forgotten?"
"No. Just wanted to be sure."
"Are you having second thoughts?"
"I'm always having second thoughts," I confessed.
"I see. Then don't worry. Second thoughts or not, you're getting married to me. This is non-negotiable. You'll move into my place after tonight. Ok?"
"What about my apartment?"
"I'll help you with the move," Mr Wen said. "And then we'll go on our honeymoon."
The sun was beginning to set when we walked out of the embassy into the blaze of afternoon glory, bathed in the golden light while holding our marriage certificates. Mr Wen was holding my hand and smiling broadly.
At the restaurant - the same one as last night, I ate in a daze, wondering when I would wake up. There were many people congratulating us and flitting about. I supposed the food was good but I barely tasted it. I was feeling much to nervous about what was still to come.
"What's wrong with your wife?"
"Don't worry about her. She thinks she's dreaming."
It wasn't until I felt a sharp pain down there and the familiar rush of feelings from my dream that I began to wake out of the reverie I had fallen into. The more he did, the more I woke up and the more I clung to him. I was so stunned that I forgot to move. Forgot to breathe. Only his gentle reminders kept me from passing out.
All night, in my dreams, we kept at it. It was exciting. Exhilarating. Freeing.
Only when I woke up, I discovered it wasn't just a dream. The moment I stirred, his heavy weight on me did too. Something inflated inside me and before I knew it, I was moaning beneath him again. When he was satisfied for the morning, I peered at him through bleary eyes, feeling like my entire body was aching.
I couldn't stay awake. I fell asleep soon after.
For the first time in a few nights, I had no dreams. Yet, I woke up with a start, feeling more awake than I had been for a long time.
Looking around, I didn't recognize the unfamiliar room or unfamiliar bed. Where was I? His place? His room? His bed? It smelled like him.
There were a lot of noise coming from outside his bedroom. With a bit of groaning and mumbling at the pain in my waist and back, I got out of bed only for my legs to give way the moment they touched the ground. I wasn't as wet and sticky as I had expected. Perhaps he had cleaned me up.
It was just that I had no clothes. After a cursory search on painful and somewhat numb limbs, I crawled back into the bed to hide.
The next thing I knew, he was in me again. What was he? A beast? Was he so insatiable?
Strangely enough, I felt a lot better when he was done and was able to take myself to the bathroom to clean up. Unfortunately, he joined me in the shower and soon had me screaming while he banged me against the wall in the most delicious way. I wasn't much awake after that.
Days passed in a blue. I barely remembered eating and being fed. I think there was even a visit to the hospital at one stage. What I remembered the most was the almost nonstop nightly exercises that I couldn't refuse, no matter how sore I was feeling. He was too good to forget.
Somehow, we ended up on an island with beautiful beaches and blue seas. I got to know the small island quite intimately. Mr Wen introduced me even to the insects amongst the leaves beneath the coconut trees. I felt that we were intertwined with each other half the time. Only heavens knew what the resort staff thought while they watched me being so thoroughly done that I couldn't move anymore.
It was only after I had observed them for a while that I recognised the staff from that restaurant. They watched us with amusement while Mr Wen thoroughly humiliated me in front of them, some of the men with their hands in their pockets and the women rubbing up against the rails. Mr Wen invited them over to touch me and I writhed.
"What naughty dreams you have," Mr Wen broke through the dream, popping it like a bubble. I woke up to find myself clothed, sitting by his side with my head on his shoulder and nowhere near an island resort. We were in a long corridor that smelled of antiseptic.
"You have brain cancer," Mr Wen told me, stroking my head.
"What?" that woke me up. Or so, I thought I did.
Because in the next moment, that bubble popped as well. With it, multiple memories popped, telling me they were the dreams and that I was being dragged, pulled back to reality. The real reality where I was stuck in a hospital bed with needles and tubes stuck in me.
What was real? What was a dream? Who was I? Was I married or not? Did I still have a job?
With effort, I lifted my heavy hand to find it bare. No wedding ring.