I can't recall the date and time when my Master picked me up from the streets; the time when he took me away from the life I had known.
A life full of suffering and unending hunger and starvation.
However...
I do remember that, at that certain fateful day; it was a cold and lonely time. The world, in the eyes of my younger self at that time, was gray.
Gray as the ashes left by fire and gray as the cobblestones on the street.
As gray as the world truly is.
I recalled that I was shivering from the cold.
I sat in Grandfather Lui's spot; curled up into a ball to preserve the little warmth left of my body and keep the biting cold chill of winter to seep into my flesh and bones.
Grandfather Lui was old.
So old that his back is already hunched down, so elderly that he needs the help of a cane just so that he can walk around.
He was someone who took care of me. Someone who raised me into who I was today.
He told me one day, on those days where I was still so hopeful to see and meet my parents, a story of how a gentle, beautiful lady, so grand in appearance and demeanor that she could be no one else but nobility, dropped off an infant with dark skin at the foot of a temple.
The lady spoke to Grandfather Lui, who was near her at that time, that she will temporarily leave this infant's care of the temple and that she will come back for the child.
"You shouldn't hope for it! Your mother might not want you with how ugly you are." After telling me that story, Grandfather Lui spoke those words as he eyes my dark skin with disdain and dissatisfaction.
I never really took those words of his to heart. Grandfather Lui is already old after all. And with old age, comes illness to the body and mind. He sometimes ends up being delirious ah.
But I really like him.
For all his harsh comments and words, he still took care of me and guided me through this harsh life. He told me a lot of things, tales of a long long time ago... and also about his family.
"I want to see her again," He would say pensively when he finished talking a little bit about his family. His eyes dark and murky with complicated thoughts of an adult that I, a small little child, could not understand.
"Did that little lass finds happiness?"
It was at those moments that his eyes would look straight at me, but only seeing someone else in my place. And, it was in those moments, which he would speak gently and softly towards me... As though I am someone he treasured and loved.
It was at those few moments that I felt the love of a parental figure.
That's why I never mind his occasional delusions.
Unfortunately, Grandfather Lui passed away. Fortunately, he died from old age.
Just a few moments of dying, he spoke to me, voice raspy and so pained that I couldn't help but cry.
"Next time, when a woman with a blue gem on her forehead comes looking for you, go with her. She's your mother."
I darkness swallowed me whole at that time as I grieved for him. But the sadness that comes with Grandfather Lui's death was as fleeting as the winds for me.
For I know that he would always be there in my heart, know that his memories would live on forever with me so long as I am alive.
I committed his last words into both my mind and soul. For they are important to me, they were the last words of my grandfather figure... And also the words that spoke of my mother's appearance.
A blue gem.
When someone with a blue gem on their forehead is looking for me, I should go with them.
I do not care about that person's gender.
After all, Grandfather Lui's mentality is really... something... since he mixes up my gender sometimes.
How can I trust him to remember and know the gender of the one who left me behind here when sometimes, he would mix up my gender? I was his grandson sometimes, and then his granddaughter the next moment.
...He was really delusional ah.
﹊﹊﹊
When he came for me, I am in a poorer state than usual. I was really hungry at that time. Winter is always the time where it is very difficult for someone like me to find food.
My only food and source of energy at that winter was a cold and stony hard meat bun that I had already consumed.
I was on the brick of giving in to my hunger and beg for food on the streets when he arrived at this abandoned temple.
His countenance is so striking, pulling in the gazes of the people here. None dared to approach him though, for his clothes and bearing signifies that his background and status is something we can never match up to.
Dressed in a black garb similar to those of the nobles that I would sometimes catch a glimpse of, he strides into the pathway of the temple. His long black hair flutters along with the cold breeze of the wind as a handsome face and unfathomable dark eyes was revealed to us.
His most eye-catching feature, though, is that lovely gleaming gem in the middle of his forehead.
A bloody red gem.
The man strides in my direction, controlled, but fierce; and I unconsciously curl up into a ball. My eyes wide as I watch him, full of suspicion and distrust towards this man dressed like a noble.
I remembered at that time, that there were a pair of nobles who would come over here once a month.
They always leave this abandoned temple with some children in tow. Children with good-looks, meek and shy children and the ones that I always feel like there was something special about them.
When those children left here, they always look smug and relieved.
Smug because out of all children here, they ended up being the ones chosen by those nobles and relieved because they will no longer be here in this place as a beggar.
They never came back.
I pity them, and at the same time, I was glad that it wasn't me who was chosen but them. It is a selfish thought but I couldn't help it.
Especially when Grandfather Lui had pulled me closer to him when they left and spoke to me, with hid voice soft and full of caution that I should never follow and leave with those men.
It was because those nobles uses those poor children as a 'sacred sacrifice' for their beliefs.
It seems so strange and unbelievable, but I trust Grandfather Lui and never came close to them.
In this world where magic exist, something like this seems plausible enough. And so I did as I was told.
After all, no matter how delusional and insane Grandfather Lui sounded, I would still believe him with this. It was rumored that he used to be a magus before after all.
A magus was someone who can use the energy around us and convert it into a power everyone calls 'magic'.
I don't know what happened to Grandfather Lui that he could no longer use his powers though.
"Are you hungry?"
His question brought me out of my musings.
His voice was rough but aggressive. It greatly complements his dangerous and fierce aura.
I shook my head in refusal, heart beating fast from this man's intense and domineering character.
But, my dear traitorous stomach decided to make itself known. It protested against my action and denial with a loud grumbling sound which caused me to blush from embarrassment.
His face softens a little before he lets out a low chuckle.
Extending his right hand, he spoke to me with the same domineering tone but it was a little but mellower than it was. It sounds, dare I say it, gentler.
"Come with me. I will give you a place to call home and food to eat."
His semi-tanned hands stood out in the whiteness of the snow. His words were powerful, arrogant and overbearing, but they filled me up with warmth and it embedded itself inside my heart.
A home and warm food.
A life were I would not need to worry for where I would spend the night, where to find my source of sustenance and a life where I would not need to be cautious and careful of my every actions.
It is a very tempting offer.
But... I have to ask him this question that has been bothering me ever since I have laid my eyes on his bloody red gem.
"Do you know my mother?"
I remembered uttering those words out before I can stop or think of what the answer to that question would have meant.
I fell silent however, faced with his heavy stare, I could do nothing but continue on to speak.
"She has a blue gem on her forehead," I paused for a bit, surprised at the sound of my voice. It was horse and rough from the lack of use. I pursed my lips before I continue on.
"Grandfather Lui said that to me a long time ago. He said that she left me here in this temple. And well, he didn't describe to me what the gem looks like but only the color! He didn't even told me what my mother looks like."
I rambled on and on and feeling his gaze turning heavier as I spoke, I fell silent.
Sneaking a peak at him, the man's eyes captured mine and I couldn't help but meekly say.
"And, well... you also have a gem. But it's like the color of blood though."
Realizing how my words sounded rather insulting and rude, I fell quiet. I stare at him warily, expecting him to become furious.
Instead, the man has a startled look on his face before it morphs into surprise. He then suddenly laughs, it was a hearty laugh really but... It sounds really sad.
His laugh sounds so jarring and off to my ears, it holds a sad, lonely quality in it. It was filled with sorrow and yearning.
"Yes." He answered me after he regained his composure. His voice was still gruff and husky from laughing.
"Your mother told me to take care of you. I apologize for taking a long time to find you."
He spoke those words sincerely, looking so apologetic that I decided to believe him.
Maybe it was because he knew my mother or it might be because he said that he was supposed to take care of me. It may even have something to do with his handsome appearance that made me do that... Or maybe, it might have been because he seems so... lonely.
But then again, the reason didn't matter. It didn't and wouldn't matter.
For I...
I reached out my hand and my little dark fingers grasp his large callous filled hands
The both of us stare at our clasps hands, marveling at the sharp contrast my small dark hand made with his own large hands.
For the first time since Grandfather Lui passed away, I smile.
"Hm. Okay."