I took two days leave from office, calling in sick. It was a horrific thing to do, but I was convinced that I had to complete reading these books before Sebastian arrived. He would be smug and let me know just how interested I was in his subject of choice.
What bothered me was how I couldn't for the life of me figure out how everything tied together. Simple definitions and conjectures did nothing to help me gain insight into the mind of the murderer. What exactly motivated him? What was his story? Why had he turned into a deviant wishing for the blood of others to be splashed on his hand?
They were pressing questions.
I found myself sleeping on the comfortable leather couch with Sheng Sheng cuddling into my chest while I took breaks from reading and taking care of him. She was a sweet cat that made little to no fuss and acted like an angel. She wanted cuddles and purrs to satisfy herself and really did scare easy. Sleeping with the ball of fur gave my heart some much-needed warmth. I even contemplated going to the pet store and buying myself a little kitten to take care of.
I stopped myself when I remembered that I would have to be out of home for long periods as my position in the company got higher. So I digressed.
.
My demons came to me in my dreams again. I witnessed as my parents were slaughtered in front of my eyes. I observed as she taunted me to come out of my hiding and face her in battle. Reality and the dream world merged then. For the first time in years, I changed my dream from what my memories had been stuck at. I bolted out of the bathroom and made my way towards her, hoping to die a more honourable death than the pain I had lived through. I fought her off with all the might I had stored up in my body.
It didn't help. She had her hands on me soon enough, and I succumbed to her power, but not without a fight.
"No," I growled as I tried to reach for her hand which had come down to grab my shoulder. I latched onto it with my teeth and bit in hard. I heard a yelp of pain, but I did not let go.
"Evie, wake up!" I heard someone call me. My jaw loosened around the hand, and I saw Alice slowly vanishing from in front of my eyes. As the darkness dissolved into the dim light of the room, I realised the grave mistake I had committed.
Sebastian was crouched down in front of me, his face in a mask of pain. I startled and let go immediately. I saw the marks on his hand, marks that I had left on him. My eyes grew moist as I stared in horror.
"I'm sorry," I mumbled, still groggy and shaken from the dream. "I'm sorry."
He was sitting on the floor, his hand clutched against his chest.
"Nightmare?" he asked carefully, as if not wanting to offend me.
I nodded, pushing my hand against my eye to wake myself up properly and punish myself for inflicting pain on him.
"I'm sorry," I said again. This time, he chuckled. He reached out to me, careful not to startle me, and the attempt made me break out into a faint smile. He must have been scared by how hard I had bitten down on his arm. He had accepted my apology, from what I could see on his face, but it didn't mean that it hadn't scared him even a little. I knew of how my thrashing around in my sleep had made my aunt believe that I was possessed, but the woman knew very well of the hellish circumstances I had overcome to be capable of sleeping again.
The fear slowly slipped out of my body. I found myself standing up and walking towards the bathroom, where I knew the first-aid box was. Sebastian had previously shown me the ropes and where all the medication was, in case I needed something during an emergency, and I was thankful for the knowledge at that moment.
I took out the kit and walked back to the living room, where he sat on the sofa, with his hand still clutched close to his face. He was inspecting the wound and blowing on it to soothe the inevitable pain he must have been feeling.
"Did I break the skin?" I asked, concerned.
"No. But you bite hard." Even though his words were said in good humour, I found myself feeling ashamed of my reactions. I apologised again, but this time, he gave me an exasperated sigh in return.
"I know how dreams can affect you, Evie. You don't need to tell me why you reacted that way," he began. He paused for a minute as I took care of the bite and then joked light-heartedly. "Will you feel less guilty if I bite you, too?"
I find myself snorting.
"Sure," I said, finally easing myself into the comfort of his presence.
"I shouldn't have left you in charge of Sheng Sheng. Now she has influenced you, and you are acting just like her." I raised my brow in question. "She bites and scratches people if they come close to her while she is sleeping. She is jumpy. And she likes to cuddle."
He gave a pointed look at me, telling me of how I had cuddled his soft cat and fallen asleep on the couch.
I coughed, embarrassed.
"Are you implying that I am a cat?" He nodded. "I like cats," I said absentmindedly.
"I do, too."
"Hmm?"
"Have you seen a therapist? About your dreams?" he asked suddenly, surprising me.
"Yeah. The guy said that I was exaggerating." I shrugged, not wanting to remember the humiliation.
The therapist had taken one look at me and told me that eating disorders were common in people who wanted to get attention. He hadn't even heard what I had to say and told me that I had exaggerated and that eating more would fix everything.
"Don't believe him," he said softly. His hand felt soft on mine. He comforted me with an eas I didn't understand how he possessed. For someone so against social connections, he was particularly good at making people feel comfortable around him.
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