Sleep didn't come for Arawn that night. He spent most of it looking at the ceiling, debating his choices. For how long could he drift around, pretending that he would return? Deep down, he knew that he didn't plan to do it. Ever.
He raised his hands, and ether flickered between his fingers. He released it before it could enter him, then called it again. The ether came like a trained beast, without any hesitation. No matter how many times he called and pushed it back, it always rushed over at a mere thought from him.
"Loyal, aren't you?" he murmured to himself, letting the ether go. "Or just so eager to devour me?"
The white dust retreated, settling back in the things it had left—the bed, stone in the walls, thick curtains, and Arawn's own clothes. It was everywhere, which is why it was so dangerous. There was no place in the world that Arawn could escape from it.
"Could I really have a normal life if I learned to control you?" he asked the ether, but without being called, it stayed still, silent.
At some point in the morning, there was a crashing sound from a nearby room. Arawn rushed to check what had happened and saw Corwal lying on the ground. The man slowly sat up with a dazed expression, rubbing his shoulder.
It took him a moment to recognize Arawn. "Water," he croaked once he did.
Eliot rushed into the room at that moment with a large cup of water. He handed it over, and Corwal drank it in large gulps. His eyes cleared up a little, but he didn't try to stand up. Leaning against the bed, he pushed his hair back and sighed.
"What happened last night?" He winced at the loudness of his own voice and continued in a lower tone. "I have a faint recollection of challenging someone to a drinking duel. I won… I think?" He closed his eyes, rubbing his temples. "It's all a bit of a blur."
"Should be," Arawn said without hiding his displeasure. "We had to drag you back. That was fun."
"Master, it wasn't— He's over—" Eliot began, but Corwal waved him off.
He opened his eyes and gave the kid a pained smiled. "It's fine. He's right. But damn does my head hurt. Why did I even drink so— Oh! Right…"
A shadow passed over his face before he could school his features. It was gone in an instant, but Arawn had learned to be quick about noticing minute changes in expression. If he hadn't, there would've been a dozen more dead bodies in the Gutter.
"You made some admissions yesterday," he said to gauge reaction.
For a moment, Corwal looked at him with a blank stare. "What did I admit to?" His brow furrowed as he tried to recall, but nothing seemed to come.
"It was right before you passed out. Some hound business and a missing princess."
"Arawn, that's enough!" Eliot suddenly said, coming to stand before Corwal. "We can talk later! Master needs to rest!" The kid was staring up at him with some trepidation, but there was a steadiness to his gaze. Although he was afraid of what Arawn could do, he didn't think he'd be attacked for real.
'Are all the people on the outside so courageous?' Arawn wondered. Corwal didn't show any appropriate horror for his power, and now even the thirteen year old boy stepped in front of him. If it was the Gutter, everyone would have scattered hours ago, not daring to even think about being in his vicinity, let alone blocking his way. 'Or do they just not know what real power is like?'
While he was lost in his thoughts, Corwal pulled himself onto the bed. It seemed somewhat more challenging that it should've been, but the man managed it by himself.
Upon straightening up, he called Eliot to his side and sat him down. He then shifted his gaze to Arawn. "Are you having second thoughts about staying around now that you know who I am?"
That was a miss so far off the target, Arawn didn't even know what to say. In the end, he settled on the truth. "I have no idea who hounds even are, so no, that doesn't bother me. I'm more interested in that princess."
"Princess Kyla? Do you know her?" After asking that question, Corwal seemed to have felt stupid and changed it up a bit. "You've heard of her?"
Arawn nodded. It had been a long time ago, in what felt like a different life, but he had heard her voice. Before the Gutter, he was kept in an abandoned wing of the royal palace. He was sent away just as she was born, but he'd heard her cries with his supernatural hearing at the time. He'd lost that ability with time, but the memories he had from living in the palace were still with him.
Even though he hadn't met almost anyone there, he felt a connection with all the people that lived there and on whom he'd spied by listening to their conversations. Now he knew it wasn't supposed to be done, but at the time, he was too young to know better, and way too bored to care. What else was he supposed to do while locked in a cage which could barely fit an adult person?
Once the princess was born, there were lots of celebrations, and the whole palace was decked in yellows and reds. The servants kept on whispering how extravagant the royal pair was being.
Yet Arawn hadn't seen any of it. He could only listen to the praises while sitting in his cage in the middle of nowhere, without a soul around him. It was probably why he remembered the princess so well. He wasn't there when the prince was born, who was a few years older than him, so there was nothing to envy. But the princess… she was born as if to mock him for his station in life.
At the time, he had even been happy that he was transferred, removed from the temptations. Or so he thought until he reached the Gutter. His naivety and innocence were soon beaten out of him there. Death became his companion instead of the royal family and their gallore of servants and courtiers.
"Arawn? You here?"
With a jolt, Arawn returned to reality. He blinked away the memories and focused on the two people sitting before him.They were staring at him with questions in their eyes, wondering why he had spaced out for no reason.
"Yeah, so how old is she now? The princess I mean."
"Twelve," Corwal said with narrowed eyes. There was suspicion in his voice. "Why do you care so much about her?"
After a moment's hesitation, Arawn admitted, "I've never seen her before. I heard she's the most beautiful young lady there is." A few criminals had complained about how the royal family was too lucky. They apparently didn't deserve such a daughter.
Corwal's expression relaxed a little, and a small smile played on his lips. "That's what everyone says, but she's the princess. If they don't say she's the most beautiful, are they going to say she's average? I'd like to see who'd dare."
There was truth to it, and Arawn nodded. He would still love to see the little girl though. In reality, that applied to everyone from the palace whose lives he'd followed, but that was a bit too much to ask. He'd be happy if he saw the princess whom he'd envied so much, and maybe the prince, the person he thought was closest to him at the time. Although they'd never talked, he knew that he wasn't the only one living in a cage, locked away from the public eye.
"Master, are we going to go look for her?" Eliot asked, looking up at Corwal with shining eyes. "It's your new mission, right?"
"I wouldn't call it a mission, but yeah, I'll have to join the investigation." Corwal looked away from the boy's eager gaze and rubbed his temples again. "It's my fault it happened. I was too careless, allowing them to bamboozle me."
That sounded like a great way for Arawn to accomplish one of his life goals which he hadn't even considered as such since it was simply impossible, and he nodded. At that moment, he was finally certain that he wasn't going back to the Gutter. Regardless of his own thoughts and wishes, helping the princess was more important than caging himself. Although he'd been envious of her, she was one of the bright bulbs in his memory. The faint recollections of the days in the royal palace were what got him through the worst days in the Gutter.
Eliot jumped to his feet and clapped. "I'll go and prepare for travel then! We're leaving today, uhm, maybe tomorrow morning? Yeah, I think that's good. I'll need some time to get the horses and collect all the necessities."
"Wait!" Corwal raised his hand, stopping the boy's enthusiastic tirade. "You're not coming. I can't bring you on a trip where we might be attacked at any moment."
"But you're taking him, aren't you?" Eliot pointed at Arawn.
"I am?" Corwal glanced at him. "You would come?"
Arawn nodded. To not put the man on guard, he said, "I still have a lot to learn from you about the ether. You promised to teach me real control over it."
"Good. I'll be more comfortable if you're not running free as well." As his words left his mouth, Corwal winced. "Sorry, that came out wrong. I meant that I'd be worried for you. The way you approach ether is just disturbing."
"If you're taking him, you have to take me," Eliot declared, hands on his hips. "Master, I've been with you longer!"
Corwal shook his head. "That doesn't change anything. You're too young. If something happens and I can't protect you, I'll never be able to forgive myself. Don't worry, I'll find you another teacher, so you don't have to wait for me to return. I-"
"So you're abandoning me?" the boy asked with his eyes reddening. He sniffed. "You just want to get rid of me, don't you? I'm just a nuisance for you!" Noticing a tear on his cheek, Eliot brushed it away with his sleeve and whirled around. Near the door, he glanced back for a second. "I hate you!"
Pain flashed through Corwal's eyes, and on instinct, Arawn extended his hand to catch the escaping boy. "What if I promised to protect him?" he probed.
When the words left his mouth, two stunned people looked at him. It would've been three if Arawn could look at himself too. He'd spoken before he'd thought about it, and color rushed to his cheeks. He let go of Eliot's sleeve and took a step to the side.
Before he could speak though, the boy engulfed him in a hug. "You would really do that?" he asked with shining eyes now aimed at Arawn. "Really?"
"Uhm… Yeah… I guess?"
He turned to the side and saw Corwal giving him a 'why would you do this to me?' look. The man sighed then. "Fine. You can come. But if anything happens, I'm going to send both of you back. Immediately. Understood?"
They nodded, and Eliot grinned up at Arawn. "Thank you!" The boy held him for a moment more, then rushed away to do the preparations. In a second, even his tracks were cold.
"Don't forget what you promised," Corwal said. "I won't always be around to defend him. He's your charge now."
Arawn nodded, feeling like he'd just done something very unnecessary. What had he even been thinking? "As long as you can protect everyone from me, it's going to be fine."
"That's some ominous words," Corwal muttered and fell back on the bed. "This damn headache is going to kill me. I'll never drink again."
"How many times have you said that before?"
"Too many, way too many."