Chapter 28 – Jiro Was Once An Artist 3
Looking around, Hiroyuki spotted a ceiling beam with a carved piece of wood. The carving was done on a dark piece of wood. Perhaps it was cherry wood? It was a meter long. The carving had depth. Most of the background was removed. The mountain peak in the background was carved to show distance. In the forefront, a bough of cherry blooms was carved to look bigger, to show the flowers were closer.
Standing in front of the wood carving, Hiroyuki said, "This carving looks to be some kind of folk art."
Jiro shook his head shyly, "That's something father and I made."
"You carved this?" Hiroyuki asked. His tone carried both surprise and admiration.
"I did some of it, but father helped me with the more intricate linework."
Hiroyuki reached his hands up to grab the carving. He lifted it off of the nails that were holding it in place. "Let's take this back with us."
Jiro nodded his head. The mat was dusty. There was nothing to clean it with in the empty apartment. Using the mat they had brought, Hiroyuki wrapped the carving up. Since Hiroyuki had decided to carry the wood carving back, Jiro ended up holding the beverages and bento box.
The carving wasn't extremely heavy, but one had to have good endurance in order to carry it back to their apartment. The most tedious part was when Hiroyuki had to walk up the stairs.
When they returned inside their apartment, Hiroyuki laid out some old newspapers. He unwrapped and laid the carving on it. Then, he walked over to the balcony and unfurled the mat, to shake the dust off. Finished, he returned to find Jiro carefully wiping the wood carving with a damp cloth.
The youth's attention was completely focused on the carving. While staring at him working, Hiroyuki noticed that the young boy had beautiful eyes. They were medium sized with long pointed ends. Jiro was a monolid, but his eyes were not small and beady. His black eyelashes were thick and long. It was like a woman who had mascara on. Hiroyuki laughed inwardly as he thought of the girls who were probably envious of Jiro's lashes.
He didn't notice that at some point in time, the young boy had stopped focusing his attention on the wood carving, but was focusing on Hiroyuki instead.
Chapter 29 – Jiro Was Once An Artist 4
"Where shall we hang it?" Jiro asked.
Hiroyuki came out from his thoughts about lashes and quickly answered, "Where do you think it will look best?"
"Above the window. That way, when we open the door, we'll instantly see it.
"That's a good idea. Let's do as you suggested."
The two people finished cleaning and then Jiro went downstairs to ask Soma for two nails. After procuring the nails, they hung the wood carving up.
"What kind of wood is this?" Hiroyuki asked.
"It's walnut. Back then, my dad worked as a carpenter. One of his clients had him make a cabinet. This piece of wood was leftover. The client didn't want it, so dad gave it to me."
"It's beautiful wood," Hiroyuki complimented.
"It used to be better. If we had mineral oil, it would shine."
"I think the market carries mineral oil. We can pick up some next time."
"Really?" Jiro's excited voice was contagious. It made Hiroyuki excited as well.
By the time they were finished, the day was drawing to an end. Even if they were to go to the park, the people would still be there. They had wanted to go early, in order to leave early, but it they were to go now, all the spots would be taken by people who would stay for dinner. Those latecomers would only leave at sundown.
"I'm sorry," Jiro apologized, as he bit down on his lower lip.
"There is nothing to apologize for. We can view the cherry blossom here."
"What?" Jiro didn't quite understand. There were no cherry blossoms and Jiro didn't think the cherry blossom showing was on television at this time.
Hiroyuki grinned before pointing to the carved wooden piece. "There, isn't the view the best?"
Jiro shyly rubbed the back of his head.
They unwrapped the bento box, which had been sitting in the fridge when they returned. Although the food was cold, but it was still delicious. Maybe because of cleaning, but Jiro felt famished. He cleaned up most of the bento box. Hiroyuki smiled as he ate and drank from his can of beer.
The best thing about this cherry blossom was that it would never wilt. When he thought of this, Hiroyuki's lips curved up into a slight arc. It had been a long time since he liked going cherry blossom viewing. In the future, if it was as fun as it was today, he wouldn't mind doing it again.
Chapter 30 – Jiro Was Once An Artist 5
With the meal completed, the two people readied for dinner. That night in bed, a thought occurred to Hiroyuki.
"Say, Jiro do you want to go back to school?"
Jiro secretly did, but he didn't want Hiroyuki to know. Because tuition fees were high. Right now, Hiroyuki didn't even have money to extraneous items for their home. Wouldn't his fees be a much bigger burden?
"I was never good at studying," Jiro replied.
"I wasn't either," Hiroyuki confessed. When Hiroyuki thought about it, there were a lot of similarities between the two of them. Maybe that's also one of the reason why Hiroyuki picked up Jiro in the first place. He saw a younger version of himself. And he wanted to help the younger boy, so he wouldn't lose his way. At least, not lose his way like Hiroyuki had.
"I still have some study books with study problems. I don't think they have ever been touched. I'll ask my mother for them. If you like them, you can use them."
Jiro's chest felt warmer. He didn't know why, but he felt Hiroyuki knew him really well. Even if he didn't admit it, but Hiroyuki could somehow decipher the truth on his own.
"Okay, if you bring them back, I'll take a look at them." Jiro's tone sounded like he had relented to Hiroyuki's demand, but he honestly was secretly overjoyed.
Hiroyuki smiled in the dark. It was too bad, Jiro couldn't see it. If he had, he would have realized that Hiroyuki's feelings for him was deeper than mere friendship. Because of the day's events, Hiroyuki had come to see Jiro as his family.
The following morning, when Hiroyuki had a moment on his walk to work, he called his mother.
"How is the phone working out for you?" his mother briefly inquired.
"It's perfect. Thank you mom."
"What are you thanking me for, you silly child."
His mother had always been much more relaxed about the rules of etiquette than his father. "That's right, the other phone user, your landscaper was it? Does he also like the phone?"
"He's very happy with it."
"Come to think of it, why did you give your landscaper a phone?"
"Because he didn't have one and it's handy to have him on speed dial. If I forget something, he can get it for me, or I can ask him to check to see if I turned off the stove."
"Oh," his mother replied with a flat tone. "And here I thought your landscaper had some kind of dirt on you and he's blackmailing you."
"Mom, if he is blackmailing me, wouldn't he ask for hard cold cash?"
His mother's loud laughter answered him. "Mom, I'm almost at the station. Before I end the call, could you do me another favor and send my box of study books over?"
"I can, but what good will those high school textbooks do for you?"
"I just wanted to look back and refresh on some concepts," Hiroyuki smoothly lied.
"I'll send them to you. In fact, I will also send you some new ones. You know that landscaper looks to be ten years younger than you. He might want the newer, more colorful books they have nowadays."
"Mom . . .?" But as Hiroyuki was about to ask, his mother how she knew about Jiro, his train arrived and he had to swiftly hang up.
On the crowded train, packed in like a sardine, Hiroyuki didn't have the room to take his phone out to text his mother to ask about how she knew about Jiro's existence. The most important part was whether or not Hiroyuki's father knew about Jiro. That's the scariest aspect of it.
Chapter 31 – No More Second Guesses 1
At work, Hiroyuki arrived one minute before work started. He clocked in just in time.
Around 10:20 am, Hiroyuki took a short break and went to call his mother.
"You want to ask how I know about Jiro, right?"
"Yes," Hiroyuki answered.
"Last time you asked for your old clothes, I was already suspicious. I went to your apartment to find you to have a meal together and met a young man wearing your clothes. I told him I was looking for my son and that young man was very helpful. Don't worry. Of course, I didn't tell him I was looking for you. At the end of the conversation, I told him I had the wrong apartment complex and then left."
"Mom, what do you think of him?"
"That kid seems wimpy. He wouldn't survive in our family. But if you want to bring him back as your adopted brother, I don't mind picking up a cute young son."
Hiroyuki felt exasperated. Since the death of his older brother, his mother had a terrible habit of wanting to pick up young boys home to raise. In fact, Hiroyuki once thoroughly believed he would see the news one day with his kicking and screaming mother being carried away in handcuffs, while the news reel at the bottom showed, "Woman attempts to kidnap cute boy from playground."
His mother giggled carefreely on the other end of the line. "Don't worry. I didn't tell your father. If you don't want to bring him home, then that's fine, but what will he do once you return home? Are you going to pay for all of his expenses?"
"Mother! Don't make it sound like I'm keeping a mistress."
"What does it matter! As long as you pay for him, that's all he'll appear to be in the eyes of our family. If you know what's good for both of you, you'll give him a tidy sum of money and let him go his own way. You and I both know that's the best outcome. Don't let the family find out about him. You don't want him to end up . . ."
Here, Hiroyuki's mother's voice turned into soft sobbing.
"Don't cry. I'm sorry mom. I know you're saying this for my own good and for his sake as well."
Hiroyuki comforted his mother for a few more minutes, before she stopped crying. "Look at me, I can't even control my emotions. I'm not fit to be your mother, Hiroyuki. Back then, I should have divorced your father."
"Mom, don't blame yourself. What happened has already happened. We can't change the past."
"Yes, you're right. But we can change the future. Hiroyuki, no matter what choice you make in the future, mom will support you. And if you like that boy, mom won't stop you."
"Mom . . ." Hiroyuki stopped, he didn't know how to respond to his mother. Hearing her words, he suddenly realized he himself didn't know what his relationship with Hiroyuki was like.
Were they in a lover's relationship?
Chapter 32 – No More Second Guesses 2
As Hiroyuki was thinking about his relationship with Jiro and how to respond to his mother, he heard a voice behind him.
"There you are. I've been looking all over for you."
Hiroyuki apologized to his mother and quickly hung up the phone.
"I'm sorry manager, I was speaking with my mother."
Because of his contrite expression, the manager's foul mood dropped considerably. "I need the chart for the number of reported complaints to HR. Send it to me quickly, so I can put it into the presentation for tomorrow's company meeting."
"Yes, right away," Hiroyuki answered, pandering to the manager.
Although he might be a rich man's son, but Hiroyuki was just a worker here at this company. No one here knew his true identity. Back then, when Hiroyuki went to apply for the position, the interviewer had briefly paused on his last name. Hiroyuki, of course, denied any relations to his family and thus the interviewer dropped the matter.
Hiroyuki knew his family and he knew that if he had said he was related to them, he would now be the Vice President of the Human Resources department. The current chief human resource officer was someone who was well-acquainted with his family. Luckily, the man had never seen Hiroyuki before, so when he met him as a small fry in the human resources department, he didn't even cast another glance at him.
As his mother had promised, she worked quickly. By lunchtime, Jiro sent Hiroyuki a text saying a couple of boxes had been delivered to their apartment. In the text, Jiro said he had left them inside and had not opened them.
Based on what Jiro wrote, Hiroyuki could sense the young boy wanted to open and see what was inside the boxes. But Hiroyuki wanted to see Jiro's face when he opened the boxes in person, so he told Jiro to wait for him to come home before opening them.
For the rest of thee day, Hiroyuki's mood was like the torrential rains outside. One moment, it was sunny and the next a deluge would come down.
The key point of his earlier conversation with his mother was that his family, including his father, had not found out yet. As long as they didn't know, Hiroyuki believed Jiro would be safe.
Chapter 33 – No More Second Guesses 3
Yes, Jiro's safety was ensured by Hiroyuki. As long as he was alive, he would protect Jiro. He hoped from now on, Jiro would realize they had a deeper connection. He hoped Jiro wouldn't second guess their relationship. But Hiroyuki didn't know what his relationship with Jiro was. They weren't family nor friends. At best, they were roommates? But that didn't seem right either. They were closer than simple roommates. And then the answer vividly appeared in his mind.
When he realized it, a smile appeared on his face.
At lunch, as he worked, Ono dropped by.
"What's going on?" Ono asked.
"Nothing much. What about you and that vindictive woman?"
Ono laughed. "She's been ignoring me."
"What now?"
"Just another misunderstanding."
"How many misunderstandings does it take for you to stop being blind to her true nature?"
"She's not as bad as you think her to be. In fact, her possessiveness is a result of my popularity. You know that many women her like my good looks."
"Tell me about it. The first time I laid eyes on you, I already knew you were going to bring me plenty of headaches."
The two men burst out into shared laughter. There was no helping it. When it comes to relationships, there were no easy answers. All relationships have obstacles. The only thing a person can do is to work on the relationship to overcome those obstacles. When people stop working, then the relationship falls apart. Ono was someone who stubbornly worked to improve his relationship.
And it's because of this redeeming quality about him, that made other people understand what a passionate person he is about love. This is also why Hiroyuki liked Ono. He respected him for his unwavering heart.
"Let's not talk about me. Lately, you seem to always be in a good mood. Are you seeing someone else?"
Hiroyuki didn't have a second thought before answering, "Yes."
Chapter 34 – Confession (1)
Affections between people need to be nurtured. Feelings grow deeper after overcoming life obstacles. Out of love, mutual trust and respect become the pillars to support the relationship.
Living a poor and frugal life style, who was it that stayed beside him and supported him wholeheartedly? Who is it who understands him better than his own family? To Hiroyuki, there is only one person who comes to mind.
"Who is it?" Ono asked. "Who are you seeing?"
"He's a young man who is currently living with me."
"A young man?" Ono's face betrayed his emotions. "But you've always dated women."
"I know, and it's never worked out."
"How did you meet him?"
Hiroyuki thought quickly. Should he lie to his friend to protect Jiro's past? Or should he tell him the truth. In a flash, Hiroyuki replied with the truncated truth.
"He was having some troubles. I met him while he needed help. His family wasn't good. So, I invited him to live with me."
"Hiroyuki, as your friend, I'm not sure how I should say this. But I wouldn't be a friend if I didn't speak with you. I know you. You're a good person, who wants to do the right thing and help others. However, are you sure what you feel for him is love or is it compassion?"
Taking some time to think the matter over, Hiroyuki knew that yes, in the beginning it was out of pity for Jiro that he brought him home. Somehow, on that day, when he saw the hopeless, imploring look on Jiro's face, it reminded him of the last time Hiroyuki saw his brother. On that day, his brother had the same hopeless, imploring expression, as he begged for help. Back then, Hiroyuki was a teenager and he couldn't help his brother. But now, facing Jiro, Hiroyuki was an adult and he had the power to help him. That's why he brought Jiro home. He wanted to atone for his past regret.
But once Jiro came to live with him and they got to know each other, those feelings of sympathy blossomed into familiarity. From familiarity came love.
Chapter 35 – Confession (2)
On his way home, Hiroyuki wondered about Jiro. What did Jiro think of him?
When he had answered Ono's question earlier, he didn't know if Ono believed him, but he meant every word of what he said. He liked Jiro. No, he loved him. Before Jiro came into his life, there was an unknown void in Hiroyuki's life. After Jiro appeared, Hiroyuki realized the void had been filled.
Every little quirky hand gesture, every facial expression, every habit, and every single one of Jiro's preferences were deeply rooted in Hiroyuki's mind. If this care for another human being isn't love, then what is it? If wanting the other person to be happy isn't love, then what is? Making time for each other, if that isn't love, then Hiroyuki felt he had never loved before.
The moment he entered the door, he saw Jiro's face. Hiroyuki knew what he wanted. He couldn't contain his feelings any longer. He had to know. He had to know what Jiro thought of him. Were their feelings mutual.
"Jiro, do you like men?"
The question came out of nowhere and Jiro didn't know how to respond. In a moment of despondency, Jiro didn't know what he should say. Should he confess that he likes men?
Seeing that Jiro did not answer him, Hiroyuki changed the wording of his question to be more specific.
"Jiro, do like me?"
Jiro's heartbeat grew louder, thumping so hard, it seemed to want to jump out of his chest. Should he tell the truth? Or should he hide it? Because Jiro's mother left him after she found out his secret. Would Hiroyuki also disdain him?
He pondered over the matter, but ultimately, he had to give Hiroyuki an answer.
"Yes," his voice barely eked out.
"You like me?"
Jiro nodded, but his eyes remained downwards. He didn't have the courage to look at Hiroyuki. Although he wanted to lie, but when you love someone, you respect them too much to deceive them. Even if the truth would get him evicted from Hiroyuki's home, Jiro would rather not lie to Hiroyuki.
"I'm so glad. I like you too."
I like you too.
These words echoed inside Jiro's head, swirling him into flustered disbelief.
"You like me?" Jiro asked.
"Yes, I like you."
Sometimes, telling the truth has its rewards. Jiro was glad he hadn't been a coward. If he had said no, then he would have missed out on Hiroyuki's confession. He would have lost his one chance to be with the other man.
Hiroyuki embraced Jiro into his body. He held the smaller framed man. Smiling widely, Hiroyuki couldn't be happier.
Jiro's tense body relaxed and his hands moved up to hug Hiroyuki back. In this moment, everything felt perfect. The mood was right.
That night, Hiroyuki and Jiro slept together in the same futon. Sleeping in each other's embrace was definitely warmer than sleeping side-by-side.
Chapter 36 – Confession (3)
A few days after officially dating Jiro, Ono dropped by Hiroyuki's work station for another long heart-to-heart chat.
"How are you doing with your boyfriend?" Ono asked casually.
"Things are going well. We've officially started dating. What about you and your wild cat?"
"What wild cat? When we were in love, I was crazy over her. The moment that she threatened to break up with me, I suddenly fell out of love. I don't know why I put up with her crazy behavior before."
"To be frank, I don't think you loved her. When you love each other, there is mutual respect and trust. But I never saw that between the two of you."
"I know. I can't say I've met a girl who makes me feel secure being a man in our relationship."
"Huh?"
"What do you mean huh? Are you making fun of me. In your relationship, are you the man or is he the man?"
"We're both the men."
"Don't tell me you two haven't hit a home run."
"We haven't even gone to first base yet."
"Okay, then do you think you are the batter?"
"Batter? He's still young. I can't think about that stuff yet."
"Ha ha ha. I get it now. You don't know how to proceed with a man, right? Geez and you're the gay one. Okay, let this straight man tell you something about gay sex. One of you is the seme (giver) and the other is the uke (receiver). The seme is the man in the relationship and the uke is the female."
"Hey, how do you know so much, Mr. Straight Guy."
Leaning in closer, Ono looked both ways before answering quietly, "I used to read my sister's BL (boy's love) comics."
Hiroyuki stifled his laughter. With a straight face he asked, "Are you sure you're purely straight?"
"I definitely am straight. I've never looked at another man, no matter how handsome he is, like that. But getting back to my original point, girls these days, they don't let you feel like a man anymore. Back in the good old days, a guy could be a guy. He could take a girl out, and treat her for a meal. Nowadays, girls want equality. They want to split the bill. They want to have a say in everything you do. Don't smoke because it's bad for my health. Don't go out drinking because I'm neglecting her. Don't do this. And don't do that. At the end of the day, I'm left feeling like I can't do anything right."
"I don't think that has anything with whether or not you're with a soft girl. I think it has everything to do with finding someone who understands you enough that they can accept your bad habits."
"Yeah, I guess. But I just wished I could have convinced her that if we worked hard at it, we could make it until the end of our lives."
"But if you're the only one putting in the effort, then the relationship is bound to fail."
Ono shrugged his shoulders and laughed self-deprecatingly. "There's nothing to be done about it."
Chapter 37 – Confession (4)
Upon entering the front door, Hiroyuki smelled a delicious odor.
"Jiro?"
Jiro closed the cabinet to reveal his handsome bright face.
"Welcome home. You're home just in time. Dinner's ready."
Hiroyuki went to wash his hands and change into more relaxing clothes.
"You cooked? Where did you learn?"
Jiro shyly answered, "Soma taught me. She used to cook for her family until she moved out."
Hiroyuki tried a bit of the fried fish. It was lightly salted and delicious.
"Where did you buy this fish? It tastes so fresh."
"I didn't buy it. One of the residents went on a fishing trip and gave both Soma and me one each."
Then Hiroyuki tried a plate of sautéed vegetables.
"How fragrant," he complimented.
"These came from the garden on the rooftop."
"There's a rooftop garden?" Hiroyuki exclaimed in surprise.
"Yes, but no one's allowed on the rooftop except for building maintenance personnel."
Jiro's serious expression when he spoke made Hiroyuki laugh lightly. It was good for Jiro to have something he abided by. People who drift through life with no convictions of their own, they won't contribute much to society.
"Someday, I'll ask Soma for permission to see if I can take you up there with me. I think you'll like it. The air is fresher and the view is magnificent."
"I would like that," Hiroyuki replied, his pervious thought thrown out the window. It's fine. Right now, Jiro was still young. But when he grows older, he'll have to think about what it is he wants to protect. A person with no conviction won't stand up to protect the thing they cherish. Whether that thing they protect is an idea or an animal or even another person. However, when they truly mature, they will understand that life isn't black or white. It is a series of shades of gray gradually deepening or lightening depending on the situation. Hopefully, Jiro will have his convictions and know when to stay and fight and when to ignore the situation and walk away.
Looking at Jiro, Hiroyuki only wanted him to grow up well. There was still time for the young boy to figure out himself.
After dinner, the two people went to buy groceries. The store had plenty of vegetables on sale. It seemed that these past few days with the warmer weather, the farmers were able to produce abundant leafy greens. With the flood of vegetables, the store rightly chose to discount the older stock of vegetables, in order to sell them off quickly.
For example, if carrots were on sale for ten yen for a bunch, then in the discount section, the older carrots would go for five yen a bag. All discounted vegetables were bagged, to avoid unscrupulous people from cheating and putting the fresher vegetables inside.
Jiro sorted through a bunch of bagged discount vegetables. In order to entice customers, some of the bags also included a few radishes or other loose items.
After sorting through a bag of shiso (perilla) leaves, Jiro selected a bag where the leaves were still edible. Most of the leaves were not wilted and the ends of the stems weren't too brown. The browner the end stems, the older the vegetable stalk.
Having picked three bags of vegetables, Jiro was about to head towards Hiroyuki, when a friendly face appeared.