I take the bus to the center of town where I know there are car lots. I wanted to wait and go further away from campus but I can't go another day without my own car. The salesman is a creep and he smells like stale cigarettes but I can't be picky any longer. After an hour of negotiation, I write him a check for the down payment and he gives me the keys to a decent 2010 Corolla. The white paint is chipped in a few places but I managed to talk him down low enough that I am willing to let it slide. I call my mother before I drive out of the lot to tell her I got a car, of course she says I should have gotten a bigger car and lists the reason why. I end up pretending to lose service and shut my phone off. I glance in the mirror once and cringe at my tired appearance. I look terrible, my hair is tangled, my eyes puffy and my cheeks are still splotchy from crying earlier.
It feels amazing to drive my own car, I no longer have to depend on public transportation and now I can drive myself to my internship. I hope my cutting ties with Harry doesn't affect it, I don't think it will but what if he is bored with just simply making me cry and does something to ruin it? Maybe I should talk to Ken and try to explain that Harry and I are no longer...dating? He thinks we are dating so I will have to come up with something besides, your son is the cruelest person in the world and he is to toxic to me so I can no longer be around him.
I then the radio on and turn it up longer that I would usually like but it does what I need it to. It drowns out my thoughts and I focus on every lyrics to every song. I ignores the fact that every song seems to remind me of Harry. Before heading back to campus I decide to go buy some more clothes, it is getting colder and I need some more jeans. I am growing tired of wearing my long skirts all the time. I end up buying a few new outfits to wear to Vance and a few pair of jeans, they are tighter than usual but they look good on me, and a couple plain shirts and cardigans. Steph isn't in the room when I return and I am glad. I really think I may need to look into changing rooms, I do like Steph but we can't continue to live together if Harry is around. Depending on how much I will be making at my internship, I could get my own apartment and live off of campus. That would be ideal for me, my mother would lose it but it isn't up to her.
I fold my new clothes and out them away before grabbing my toiletry and and head to the shower. When I return, Steph and Zayn are sitting on her bed. Great.
"Did Harry ever find you last night?" She asks and I nod.
"So did you work it out then?"
"No, well yea I guess. I am done with him." I tell her. Her eyes go wide, she must have assumed he would sink his claws back into me.
"Well, I for one am glad." Zayn smiles and Steph swats his arm. Her phone beeps and she looks down.
"Tristan is here, we gotta go. Wanna come?" she asks.
"No thanks. I got a car today!" I tell her and she squeals.
"Really!" She says and I nod. "I will have to see it when I get back." She says and they head for the door.
Steph walks out but Zayn lingers in the doorway.
"Tessa?" His voice is as smooth as velvet. I look up and he smiles at me.
"Did you think about our date?" He asks, staring into my eyes.
"I..." I am about to reject him but why? He is very attractive and seems sweet. He didn't take advantage of me when he easily could have. I know he would be better company than Harry, anyone would be honestly. "Sure". I smile.
"Sure as in you will let me take you out?" His smile grows.
"Yea, why not?" I reply.
"Tonight then?" He asks.
"Yea, tonight is good." I don't think tonight is a good idea seeing as I have studying to make up for but I am still ahead despite the fact that I have missed a few classes this week.
"Awesome, I will be here at seven, yea?"
"Okay." I tell him and he brings his lip between his perfect teeth.
"See you tonight beautiful." he says and I flush, waving goodbye as he leaves the room.
It is four now, I have three hours until he will be back. I blow dry my hair and curl the ends and to my surprise is looks really good. I apply light makeup and put one of my new outfits, a pair of dark jeans, a white tank top and a long brown cardigan. My nerves are getting the best of me as I stare into the mirror. Maybe I should change? I put on a blue tank top and a button up shirt. I can't believe I am going on a date with Zayn, I have had a boyfriend in my entire life and now I am going on a date with Zayn after all this mess with Harry. Maybe guys with tattoos and piercings are my new type?
I pull out my old copy of Pride and Prejudice and begin to read to pass the time. What seems like just minutes later, there is a knock at the door. I know it must be Zayn because Harry wouldn't knock. he would rudely barge in and throw my stuff all over the place.
When I open the door I can't help but gape at Zayn. He is dressed in tight black jeans, white sneakers, and a t-shirt with a cut off jean jacket on. He looks so hot.
"You look beautiful Tessa." He greets me and hands me a flower. A flower? I am surprised and flattered by his simple gift.
"Thank you" I smile and bring the flower to my nose.
"Are you ready?" He asks politely.
"Yea, where are you taking me?" I ask him as we walk outside.
"I figuresd we would just go to dinner and a movie, just a casual date, no pressure." he beams. I reach for the passenger door handle but he stops me.
"I was going to do that for you." He says.
"Oh. Thanks." I am still nervous but now my nerves are fading. When we got into the car he keeps the radio off and makes small talk, asking about my family and my plans after college. He tells me how he is going to WSU for environmental science, which surprises but intrigues me. We arrive at a casual cafe style restaurant and we sit out on the patio. We order our meals and we continue chatting until the food comes. Zayn eats all of his food and begins to speak fries off of my plate.
"If you take another fries I will have to kill you." I tease. He give me a mock innocent look and laughs with his tongue between his teeth. I find myself laughing for what seems like ages, and it feels great.
"You have an adorable laugh." He compliments and I roll my eyes.
We end up going to see a cheesy comedy that fails to entertain either of us. We make small jokes to each other during the movies and he puts his hand over mine towards the end. It's not uncomfortable like I had assumed that it would be but it doesn't feel the same as when Harry does it. I made it hours without even thinking of him and I am glad. He consumes my thoughts everyday, all day. When Zayn drops me off back at my room it is eleven, I am glad it is Wednesday, only two more days until weekend. He gets out of the car and walks over to me as I adjust my purse on my waist.
"I had a really nice time, thank you for agreeing to come out with me." he tells me.
"I had a nice time too." I smile.
"I was thinking... remember when you asked if I was going to the bonfire." I nod. "Do you mind if I come along?" He asks.
"Yea that would be fine. I will be going with Liam and his girlfriend though." I don't recall Zayn joining in on the group teasing Liam but I just want to make sure he knows that is not okay.
"That's fine, he seems nice." he says and I smile.
"Well its settled then. I will meet you there?" I suggest. There is no way I am taking him to dinner at Liam's house.
"Sounds good. Thanks again for tonight." He takes a step closer. Is he going to kiss me? He wraps his hand over mine and brings it up to his mouth. He places one single kiss on the top of my hand, his lips ring is cold against my hit skin but his gesture is very sweet.
"Have a good night, Tessa." he says and gets back into his car.
I am relieved that he didn't try to kiss me, even though he was good at kissing, I just don't think the timing is right. Now, I just have to think of a way to explain my companion for Friday to Liam.
Steph is curious about my time with Zayn tonight but I keep the details to myself. After I wipe my makeup off I finally climb into bed and sleep. The next morning Liam is waiting at the coffee house for me and I tell him about Zayn.
"Does Harry know about this?" Liam asks.
"No, he doesn't need to. It is none of his business." I say a little too harshly. "I'm sorry, it's just a touchy subject."
"Obviously." he smiles. "They must not be too close of friends if Zayn is taking you out to dinner right after everything with Harry."
"Well no one actually know that anything happened with me and Harry, he kept it all a secret from his friend, remember?"
"Yea, I guess you are right. Just be careful." He warns me sweetly and I promise him that I will. The rest of the day zooms by and Liam doesn't bring Harry or Zayn up again. Finally, it is time for Literature, I hold my breath as Liam and I walk in the room. Harry is sitting in his usual seat. My chest aches at the sight of him. He glances over at me but turns back to the front of the room.
"So you went out with Zayn last night?" Harry asks as I sit down. I was praying that he wouldn't talk to me.
"That's not of your concern." I tell him quietly. He turns in his seat and brings his face close to mine.
"Words travel quickly in our group Tessa, remember that." he smirks. Is he trying to threaten to tell his friends the intimate times we have had? The thought makes bile rise in my throat.
I turn away from him and focus my attention to the professor. "Okay everyone, let's start off where we left off yesterday discussing Wuthering Heights." he says and my stomach drops.
We aren't supposed to be discussing Wuthering Heights until next week, this is what I get for missing class. I feel Harry's eyes on me. Perhaps, like me he is thinking about the first time I was in his bedroom and he caught me reading his copy of novel.
"So as we know Catherine and Heathcliff has a very passionate relationship, their passion was such a force in the novel that it ruined essentially every characters life around them. Some argue that they were terrible for each other and some argue that they should have married one another instead of fighting their love from the beginning." The professor says. "What do you think?" he asks us. Usually, I would raise my hand immediately, proud to show off my expert knowledge on classic novels, but this one hits too close to home.
"I think they were terrible for one another, they fought constantly and Catherine refused to admit her lover for Heathcliff. She married Edgar even though she knew she was in love with Heathcliff the entire time. If they would have just been together in the beginning everyone would have been a lot less miserable." A voice from the back of the room answers. I feel my cheek heat up as Harry looks at me before speaking.
"I think Catherine was a selfish, pompous bitch." gasps are heard through the room and the professor scold Harry before he continues. "Sorry, but she thought she was too good for Heathcliff and maybe she was, but she knew Edgar could never compare to Heathcliff yet she married him anyway. Catherine and Heathcliff were just so similar that it was hard for them to get along, but if Catherine wasn't so stubborn they could have lived a long and happy life together." He says. I feel foolish as I begin to compare Harry and I to the characters in the novel. The difference is that Heathcliff loved Catherine tremendously, so much that he sat by idly as she married another man, before finally marrying someone else. Harry does not love me that way, or at all so he has no right to compare himself to Heathcliff.
The entire class seems to be looking at me, waiting for my reply. They are probably hoping for an argument like last time, but I stay quiet. I know he is trying to bait me, and I will not fall for it.